The sunlight illuminated through the curtains, right onto Yeonjun's previously sleeping face. He shifted around and opened his eyes to face the ceiling, dazed off without any coherent thoughts. He couldn't fall asleep again though - the room felt cold. Way too cold, so Yeonjun blindly reached out for the blanket. Fingertips grazing on his bed, Yeonjun frowned when he touched a stiff object. Warm, squishy, human like.

Yeonjun's eyes darted around the room only to spot Beomgyu laying down beside him. That guy who was in the same band as him. Choi Beomgyu. The one who pissed him off every single day. Yeah, that's him. Yeonjun felt relieved for a second, but that's when he realized that Beomgyu was naked. He covered his eyes, even though they see each other like that quite often.

Why was Beomgyu naked in his bed? Yeonjun didn't know. So he asked him.

"Why are you naked in my bed?"

No response. Oh, Beomgyu must be sleeping. Yeonjun could tell that much by seeing him breathe in and out softly. The younger was never that relaxed while awake. Wait, since when were Yeonjun's eyes uncovered?

Something seemed off. Yeonjun's head was hurting like hell, as if someone beat him up yesterday. But that's not what happened yesterday. Frankly, Yeonjun didn't remember much. His brain was still a little foggy, and he momentarily thought that this was just a dream, but Beomgyu started snoring and it wasn't cute snoring. It was Beomgyu's snoring. The one that caused Yeonjun many sleepless nights during their debut days. This was definitely reality.

"Gyu..," Yeonjun's hand reached out to shake Beomgyu's shoulder, urgent and agressive. It seemed tasty. Beomgyu's shoulder seemed tasty. So Yeonjun leaned over and bit it.

"Aaaaah!"

He watched as Beomgyu's body jerked forward, stumbling until he fell onto the floor. Yeonjun felt bad, but after all he never invited Beomgyu for a sleepover. He wanted him to leave immediately. So he said it out loud. "Go away, Beomgyu."

He heard a few groans from the floor, and saw Beomgyu's hand reached out on the mattress. "Help me up immediately or I will kill you with my bare hands."

Yeonjun giggled, arms wrapping around his own tummy in pure comedy. Then he sat up and intertwined their fingers, pulling his bandmate up. When Beomgyu returned to the bed, he was deep in thought. Scanning Yeonjun up and down, he suddenly gasped in horror and covered his mouth.

"You asshole! You motherfucking asshole!" Beomgyu shouted dramatically, and Yeonjun shushed him down because the other members were probably still sleeping. He wasn't feeling so comfortable anymore, and that's when consciousness started kicking in.

They weren't in his bedroom. They were in a hotel room.

He looked at Beomgyu with question in his eyes, and the younger bit his lip nervously before covering himself with a blanket.

"What? Why am I an asshole? Why are you so quiet?" Yeonjun blurted out, questioning his own sanity at this point. There was a faint memory in his mind, blurred out whenever he tried to reach it.

"You really don't remember?" Beomgyu asked, stressed out and rectulant. Yeonjun shook his head.

"Oh my god, hyung..," he trailed off, hiding his face in his hands. Yeonjun didn't get what Beomgyu was saying at all, until the younger turned around and opened a second drawer of his bedside table. Suddenly, there was a used condom in Beomgyu's hand and everything made sense.

Fuck.

"Wait, did we..?" Yeonjun mumbled, doing an O shape with his hand and sticking a finger through. Beomgyu couldn't face Yeonjun but still nodded his head like he knew exactly what he was talking about.

"No way. We didn't. You're.. you're lying."

It was impossible. Yeonjun could already feel his senses coming back, flashbacks from last night rushing through his mind. He got goosepumps because this wasn't supposed to happen - actually, Yeonjun was sure that it was just a sick joke Beomgyu came up with. They couldn't, and they didn't... fuck. That just wasn't cool, no matter how drunk they got. Beomgyu was his bandmate, best friend and everything else, but nothing will ever persuade Yeonjun that they had sex together.

But they did. Yeonjun knew.

"I wish I was," Beomgyu huffed, looking at Yeonjun with uneasy eyes, and that's when the older realized that he was naked as well. They were both naked. This was so obvious, yet so foreign because he couldn't imagine how much alcohol he had in him to fuck an actual Choi Beomgyu. "I don't remember how it happened, though."

Yeonjun gulped. "But I do."

...

There wasn't anyone else that would agree to Yeonjun's offer. Not on the first day of their very short break, when they're supposed to be resting after the harsh schelude they had.

Thank God he had Beomgyu.

His younger bandmate immediately nodded when Yeonjun asked him about going to a club, winding up and having some fun together. In fact, Beomgyu's face lit up like he saw an ice cream truck, eyes shining bright and a smile so sickeningly sweet it was infectious. Yeonjun couldn't help smiling too.

So here they were, around nine in the evening, choosing outfits for each other. Yeonjun was pissed, sitting on his bed with his arms crossed and a pout, because Beomgyu kept bringing him ridiculous shirts to wear. And that was after Yeonjun chose the best outfit known to man for Beomgyu. But after all, the younger looked good in everything. He usually hid his body in oversized clothes, so people forgot about how well built Beomgyu really was. Yeonjun couldn't say the same about himself.

For the past few weeks, his head was flowing with unwanted thoughts after seeing that one tweet calling him fat. Someone called Yeonjun fat. It seemed ridiculous, because he always tried his best to stay in shape and ate the same amount of food as Beomgyu. Which meant a little. The younger was always a light eater, but the same couldn't be said about Yeonjun. His body needed more food, but his stomach twisted whenever he ate more than Beomgyu or Taehyun. So he spent a few days overthinking and then adjusted his portions of food. His self esteem was better now, even though his stomach churned all the time.

But someone still went on Twitter and called Yeonjun fat. He wanted to know why. There was something wrong with him - or rather his body. His effort still wasn't enough to please his fans.

"Earth to Yeonjun hyung," Beomgyu waved his hand infront of Yeonjun's face, which made him snap out of his thoughts. His mind was a scary place sometimes, but Yeonjun never talked about it. He should be able to deal with it himself.

"This one would look so good on you," Beomgyu continued, holding a piece of clothing infront of Yeonjun's face. He blinked a few times to actually process what Beomgyu was showing him, and then frantically shook his head. It was a black crop top, something that Yeonjun would really love, but at the moment, he felt like losing more weight first before putting such a shirt on himself.

"Not that one," Yeonjun mumbled, averting his gaze to Beomgyu while biting his lips. The younger looked at him with confusion, as if waiting for an explanation. "Not feeling those vibes today."

"Are you kidding?" Beomgyu huffed, pointing at all of the clothes on the floor which Yeonjun rejected before. There was already a pile forming. "What's wrong with you today? You love crop tops!"

Yeonjun didn't really know how it happened, but he ended up wearing that damn black crop top. Maybe he just felt too tired to care about the criticism, or maybe all it took to convince him were Beomgyu's puppy eyes.

After briefly listening to Soobin's ted talk about how they should rather stay home and watch movies with them, Yeonjun and Beomgyu found themselves calling the taxi to take them into one of the most expensive clubs in Seoul. It was very private, and that was the main reason why they chose it in the first place. Nobody needed to see papparazi photos of drunk Yeonjun passed out on the floor. Or even worse, rapping Cypher 3 on the bar table. Not like that happened before or something.

"I can't wait to get wasted," Beomgyu cheered once they finally got inside, pratically running to order them the drinks. Yeonjun just laughed and slowly followed him, already feeling bad for the barista when Beomgyu pronounced 'Gin & Tonic' wrong. They paid with Yeonjun's credit card and made themselves comfortable on bar stools, gulping down the drink in a matter of minutes.

And then Beomgyu ordered another. And another and another.

"...and then I say, go away you bitchy bitsh!" Yeonjun stumbled upon his own words, telling Beomgyu a very interesting story from his high school days. His head was spinning around, and there were around three Beomgyu's standing infront of him on the dance floor. Being a lightweight, Yeonjun always got drunk quickly, but Beomgyu wasn't that much better, which made the whole situation worse.

Beomgyu started hysterically laughing, stumbling and falling forward until their chests met, but Yeonjun didn't know which Beomgyu was the real one so he couldn't catch him. They fell on the floor with a loud thump, earning little to no audience. Yeonjun groaned, wiggling around because Beomgyu's sweaty body was on top of his and he couldn't move.

"You okay?" Beomgyu called out loudly, clumsily throwing himself onto the floor next to Yeonjun. It happened again. Yeonjun was wasted on the floor again. He let out an extravagated sigh, vision blurry and seeing stars infront of him. Wait, those weren't stars. They were strands of Beomgyu's messy hair while he was shouting all the nasty and innapropriate things at Yeonjun to finally get his attention. And for a moment, Yeonjun truly wasn't present - but he collected himself and slapped Beomgyu on the face a few seconds later.

"Owwwieee!" Beomgyu screamed like someone just broke his spine, falling onto Yeonjun again and this time directly between his legs - on his crotch. Beomgyu's face was on his crotch. It was possibly the most embarassing and unfortunate situation that Yeonjun got himself into, and if he could decipher that much while being drunk, he didn't want to know what would happen if he was sober.

"Get off of me!" Yeonjun screamed at him back, and he could already feel that people were looking at them. This was a luxurious club, so something like this was seen as obscure and quite innapropriate. When Beomgyu didn't move an inch, Yeonjun grabbed a fistful of his hair and forcefully pulled him back up. "Leave me dick alone!"

"Gentlemen, please keep it down."

Yeonjun wanted to apologize to the bodyguard that just approached them, to tell him that they probably went too far, but Beomgyu looked at him through his glorious eyelashes and let out the most offensive, disrespectful and insulting answer out of his filthy mouth. "How about ya keep it down, chunky ass cunt."

They were thrown out of that club.

"Sooo dumb, you sooo stupid," Yeonjun repeated over and over, holding onto Beomgyu's shirt for dear life because his legs were giving up. It was mildly raining by now, and they managed to call the taxi from Yeonjun's phone, so all they had to do was wait.

He felt Beomgyu's hands on his waist, holding them chest to chest and if it was a different situation, everything would be fine. But at the moment, there was just something so attractive about Beomgyu's veins and the cold fingers tapping against his skin. Yeonjun couldn't help it. He wanted to get laid tonight, but what he got instead was Beomgyu's face on his dick, so he needed to work with what he had. There was no space for rational thoughts. Not when he was this drunk. So Yeonjun's mind unwillingly turned off.

"Hyung.. hyung enough," Beomgyu pulled him away when the taxi arrived, and only then Yeonjun realized what he was doing. He was leaving small trails of kisses alogside of Beomgyu's neck, all sloppy and wet and it probably rather disgusted the younger. It wasn't like Yeonjun never did that, either; they were all very affectionate with each other. But Yeonjun's heart ached in a weird way; he never knew he could feel like that just with Beomgyu's presence. It was like he wanted more, needed more. Yeonjun just blamed it on the clinginess after alcohol.

"I'm hard," Yeonjun stated bluntly, right when they sat down in the taxi. Beomgyu's eyes widened and he merely looked at the driver, rather focusing on slapping Yeonjun's thigh to shut him up. What they both didn't expect was Yeonjun moaning right there and then, back arching in pleasure.

"I-" Beomgyu trailed off, but Yeonjun only hid his face in his hands and stayed quiet. It was so embarassing he wanted to curl up into a ball and cry, because emotions were a hundred times harder when he was drunk. Instead though, he let out sinful words that made Beomgyu choke on his own saliva because hello, the driver was still there, present and waiting for them to say their destination.

"I want to get railed, sooo bad."

Beomgyu looked apalled, but there was a hint of something else in his eyes. He struggled to speak properly when he finally said; "Take us to the Four Seasons Hotel, please."

After they arrived, Beomgyu decided to leave the driver a tip for bearing with them and also sent him a flying kiss, which made Yeonjun furious and he didn't know why. Yeonjun actually didn't know many things. Like why Beomgyu was taking them to a hotel instead of going home and getting a special treatment by Tyunning because they always felt bad. Oh, and a lecture by a worried Soobin.

So he asked Beomgyu.

"Why are we hereee?" Yeonjun whined, a pout never leaving his lips and Beomgyu only giggled. It would be a cute moment that Yeonjun could treasure forever, only if Beomgyu didn't fall again. Right onto the red carpet. Immediately, there were workers helping him stand up and Yeonjun just watched while laughing and searching for his phone to record it.

"One room for couples, the best one ya have. Four stars, at least," Beomgyu requested to the receptionist, and Yeonjun started laughing again. Everything was so funny, even the receptionist's face. "Is a five star hotel, dummy!"

"Room 143, here are the keys," the receptionist handed them to Yeonjun, and her eyes widened in horror when she saw Beomgyu running off and crawling the stairs on four. "I would advise you to take the elevator instead."

"Gyu.. you're not a dog!"

They arrived succesfully in their room, even if it took a lot of effort because numbers on the doors weren't easy to read. Yeonjun immediately threw himself into the sheets, closing his eyes just for a second. They were soft and smelled like vanilla, which was more comforting than the smell of alcohol and Beomgyu's sweat. Actually, Beomgyu didn't smell that bad. Right, Beomgyu. The younger boy layed down next to him and looked at Yeonjun like he was expecting something to happen.

"What?" Yeonjun frowned, utterly confused. Beomgyu pinched his cheeks with a giggle.

"Ya wanted to get railed, so.."

"So?" Yeonjun asked, caressing the cheeks that Beomgyu just assaulted. Maybe Beomgyu reserved them a stripter. That would be so relieving, considering that Yeonjun's dick was still alive and in need of release. He was seriously worried that it would fall off soon.

"I'm the railer."

"That doesn't even make sense-"

Except it did. Yeonjun's face immediately went red, and it was not because his cheeks hurt. He was drunk, tired and Beomgyu helping him get off would seriously feel like heaven right now. And Beomgyu looked so good. He was wearing a white tank top that Yeonjun so professionaly chose for him, together with denim jeans. Such a simple outfit yet it made him look ethereal.

But it was Beomgyu. Choi Beomgyu who did so many weird things through the day that repeatedly put Yeonjun off. He was sure that none of their fans would like him romantically if they lived together with him. Beomgyu was just.. Beomgyu. There shouldn't be anything attractive about him when Yeonjun knew him so personally, knew so much about him as a person. His morning routine, moody personality, the way his shit smelled after he exited the toilet.

But he also knew Beomgyu - the pretty boy archetype that everyone would die for. The one whose puppy eyes could convince Yeonjun in a heartbeart, or the one whose smile could light up the whole room. The Choi Beomgyu with bubbly and charming personality, the one who hugged Yeonjun after difficult days and became his therapist while struggling himself.

"Please.. rail me," Yeonjun whispered into the silence. He cringed internally afterwards, but there wasn't much room to think since Beomgyu straddled his lap and suddenly, he was everywhere. Yeonjun breathed out the air he didn't know he was holding when Beomgyu finally leaned down and kissed his lips, messy and desperate and just how Yeonjun wanted him. His heart was racing miles when he kissed Beomgyu back and sucked on his bottom lip, already breathless. As embarassing as it was, Yeonjun needed to pull away so he could take a deep breath, but he was struggling. Just something about being underneath Beomgyu made him rigid, like his body was slowly turning off and leaving everything else to Beomgyu.

"Hyung..," the younger stammered, so gentle and reassuring that it actually made Yeonjun worried about how pathetic up he must look right now. He already missed the feeling of Beomgyu's lips against his own, so he puckered his lips and pointed at them. "Kiss me."

And Beomgyu listened, leaving a trail of saliva alongside of Yeonjun's lips, and it should be disgusting, it really should, but it only turned Yeonjun on. Suddenly, he forgot about every single flaw that Beomgyu had and only focused on how good he can be. Passionately kissing him back, Yeonjun moaned into the kiss and felt the bulge in his pants grow, especially because Beomgyu was almost directly sitting on it. He buckled his hips upwards and this time, it was Beomgyu who was making unholy sounds into the wetness of his lips.

Rectulantly pulling away when Beomgyu tapped on his arm, Yeonjun watched him undress piece by piece. He wanted to say that it can actually be hotter when they take their time, but Yeonjun was just as desperate as Beomgyu, so he did the same and threw their clothes somewhere on the floor. It felt like a movie scene - except that Beomgyu immediately ruined it by bringing their dicks together and meassuring them.

"Beomgyu!" Yeonjun shouted, only to be interrupted by an excited squeal.

"We're not only the same height, but our dicks are similar as well!"

"You're sooo weird. And I'm taller," Yeonjun covered his eyes in pure disbelief, only to hear Beomgyu laugh. This was the real Beomgyu. Only he could ruin the most enticing moment by something so obscure. It made his almost sober thoughts come up, the ones that told him to immediately stop because he would regret it later. But Beomgyu made them all dissapear simply by pecking Yeonjun's nose and leaning down to whisper in his ear. "Wanna suck it, please."

"Do it," Yeonjun responded, voice already strangled and they didn't even do anything yet. It was unbelievable, the effect that Beomgyu had on him. His back arched painfully when he felt Beomgyu swallow him deep, wet mouth clinging against his cock. Just like that, no sequence of careful events leading to it. It was so Beomgyu coded that Yeonjun wanted to laugh, but he was also kind of impressed by Beomgyu's ability to suck cock without choking, so instead he let out a high pitched moan and thrusted his hips forward.

"Ah, please, please, please," Yeonjun repeated like a broken cassette, not even knowing what he was so desperately pleading for. He just wanted Beomgyu and Beomgyu alone, all for himself. Yeonjun never wanted to live without his warm mouth anymore. "It's so good, so good... Gyu, you're doing so good."

His cock was already leaking with pre-cum when they started, so it didn't take long for him to be painfully close. He tugged onto Beomgyu's hair and lifted him off, forcefully squeezing his legs together to avoid making a mess right then and there. After he opened his eyes again, Beomgyu was there, watching him in awe, and Yeonjun wanted to cry because Beomgyu looked at him so lovingly, like he was actually beautiful. Like Yeonjun's body was actually beautiful.

But it was Beomgyu that should be admired. His puffed lips were rosy red, matching the color of his flushed cheeks perfectly. They were stained with tears, and suddenly Yeonjun didn't feel so bad for wanting to cry. It was just so lovely, living in that moment. Drunk or not.

"Let me.. let me do something for you," Yeonjun blurted out, because he suddenly felt like he wasn't doing enough. Beomgyu just sucked his dick and he didn't do anything yet. "What do ya want? Want my hands?.. My mouth?"

"Everything," Beomgyu breathed out, smiling big and Yeonjun could just smile back. He pulled Beomgyu forward by his arm and swiftly changed their positions, so that he was straddling Beomgyu this time. The younger suddenly started giggling, deep honey like voice echoing through the room, and Yeonjun frowned because he was genuinely confused.

"What?"

"Nothin'. Just enjoyin' this."

Yeonjun snorted and slightly adjusted himself so that he wasn't completely sitting on Beomgyu, because after all, he was heavier. It made him feel bad about himself, like Beomgyu deserved someone better who could sit on him without smothering him to death. His head was spinning, a bit dazed off and drunken out, so he took a moment to brace himself back to normal. Beomgyu noticed.

"What're you doing?" he asked, hands lightly touching Yeonjun's waist, just lingering there - but Yeonjun wanted them to stay forever and ever. "Just sit on me."

"No."

Beomgyu was looking at him with question in his eyes, pressing Yeonjun down by the waist until he was finally straddling him. The older didn't look too happy about the whole situation. "Why not?"

"Just..," Yeonjun trailed off, and there it was again. He felt beautiful like that, being watched by Beomgyu. It was so overwhelming he wanted to curl up into a ball, and he felt pathetic because Beomgyu was probably just horny and wanted a quick fuck. That's all, yet it felt like so much more. Maybe because Yeonjun didn't get laid in so long. Yeah, that was probably it.

"Just?"

"Just thought it's too much weight," Yeonjun answered truthfully, feeling a warm wave of alcohol rush through his veins. Beomgyu was getting ready to bash Yeonjun out, he could already see it on his expression, but the older only shushed him down by pecking his lips. "Keep quiet. Wanna focuse on you. Wanna take care of you."

Before Beomgyu could say anything else, Yeonjun was already lowering down to suck onto his nipples, watching the way Beomgyu's eyes widened in surprisement. He licked around, merely closing his eyes when Beomgyu's fingers dug into his waist. It was painful, but in a good way. Even better when Beomgyu's other hand traveled into his hair.

Switching to Beomgyu's neck, Yeonjun slowly started nibbling and licking around, momentarily lifting his head up to silently ask Beomgyu for approval. The younger nodded, so Yeonjun bit down to create a hickey, pulling back to see how nicely it contrasted with Beomgyu's pale skintone.

"Thank ya," Beomgyu giggled, and Yeonjun did the same. It was a little awkward, but Beomgyu told Yeonjun to get off of him and lay down on his back, and who was Yeonjun to decline?

"Lube? Condom?" Beomgyu asked, raising an eyebrow at Yeonjun like he was a damn cashier. He laughed and pointed at his pants that were laying down on the floor. "There."

"Gotcha," Beomgyu winked, clumsily jumping off the bed and while Yeonjun's hard got a bit toned down, it was still worth it - sleeping with Beomgyu. That boy was one of a kind.

Before Yeonjun could realize what was happening, he felt Beomgyu's finger against his hole, making him shudder. He was so dazed out he couldn't even tell when Beomgyu opened up the lube or applied some on his fingers. That way or another, when his finger pressed down deeper, Yeonjun let out the most embarassing, high pitched and broken down sound that he ever made. Not the one that makes you fall in love with someone. It was terrible, really. But Beomgyu only snorted and continued to push his finger in, slightly wiggling it around and earning small whimpers in reply.

"Oh God," Beomgyu breathed out against his neck, thrusting his finger in and out when Yeonjun lightly nodded his head. "So sensitive and I haven't even done anything yet."

"Yeah.. don't need to," Yeonjun whined when Beomgyu added another finger, hips twitching. "It's just you.. you turn me on, so so much."

"Alright," Beomgyu chuckled, and now that there were three fingers up Yeonjun's ass, he couldn't even breathe with how much he needed it. How much he needed Beomgyu, how sweet his voice was and how good his hands were.

"What are you so pretty for?"

It was Beomgyu, running a hand through Yeonjun's hair, removing strands out of his face. It made him feel so cherished, and his heart almost burst out of his chest. Being affectionate, drunk and touch deprived was a deadly combination. And Yeonjun currently had all of those traits.

"Please, fuck me."

And Beomgyu obliged. Yeonjun watched as he lubed up his cock and opened a condom, struggling to put it on. He started laughing, and Beomgyu looked at him like he was heavily offended. "You want to get fucked or not?"

"Sorry, my hero."

Beomgyu gave him a sly smile and when his condom was finally on, he spread Yeonjun's legs apart and rested his dick there, just admiring how beautiful Yeonjun really was. And he told him. Beomgyu praised him around a hundred times while slipping his cock in, and Yeonjun swore he'd be a crying mess soon if Beomgyu continued the act. He rolled his eyes back in pleasure and let himself be taken somewhere far, far away while Beomgyu pushed himself deeper into him.

He didn't remember much afterwards. Not the events, at least. But the feeling of home was the one that stayed. Yeonjun felt so, so loved under Beomgyu's touch and compliments... so he told him.

"I love you."

...

"Wow," Beomgyu breathed out, watching the ceiling instead of looking at Yeonjun's overwhelming stare on him. "We really did a lot, huh?"

"Don't say it like that," Yeonjun scrunched up his nose. It was still so unbelievable that they actually had sex together, and he didn't know how he was supposed to go back to normal after that. Was it even possible to look at Beomgyu the same way?

And did he want to look at him the same way?

Before any of them could say anything else, Beomgyu's phone started ringing. It was impossible to overhear it, since his ringtone was set on Barbie Girl by Aqua for quite a while. It was such a stupid idea, and Yeonjun always got second hand embarassment when they were out in public.

"Oh..," Beomgyu looked at his phone, expression a bit frantic. "Soobin hyung's calling me."

Yeonjun held his breath. Beomgyu picked up the call and set it on speaker.

"Beomgyu?"

"Yes?"

"I'm going to kill you both."

As it turns out, fans took photos of Beomgyu and Yeonjun going into a taxi, looking like they just came out of a homeless shelter. Seriously, it was really bad. Their manager already contacted Soobin, and the poor leader was hopelessly trying to reach them since yesterday. Yeonjun checked his phone and had twenty-one missed calls from Soobin, fourteen from Taehyun and seventeen from Huening Kai. Together, that's... a lot of calls.

When Beomgyu hung up, he looked at Yeonjun and they both started hysterically laughing. There was nothing funny about the situation whatsoever, but Yeonjun still felt amused.

"There's something I didn't get to tell you yesterday," Beomgyu trailed off, his gaze suddenly focused on Yeonjun - like he was the only thing that mattered in this world.

"What is it?"

"I love you too."