dakota's pov +

i didn't tell anyone where i was really going today.

i told my mom and nate that i was heading to the library and i told my friends that i had a family over so i couldn't hang out. i just needed to do this on my own. i just need to get it over and done with, and never speak of this day again.

it was three o'clock and i stood outside the cafe, questioning whether to enter or not. numerous people walked in and out whilst i stood on the side, contemplating what to do next.

i soon picked up the courage to open the door and walk inside to scan the room for my father.

people can change a lot in four years, so i probably wouldn't recognise him at a first glance. or maybe he's decided to bail on me as per usual.

"dakota?" i heard a voice say from behind me and i looked over to see him sitting by the window on one of the stools - my dad.

"hi" he let out a smile, standing up from his seat. "i was starting to think that you changed your mind".

he took a few steps forward to hug me, but i instantly stepped back. it's been far too long and i'm just not comfortable with him like that anymore.

i could tell that he was taken aback by my resistance, but he brushed it off and gestured to the seats.

"come on, let's sit" my dad said and he sat back on his stool by the window, but i decided to sit one seat away from him.

"look at you. wow" he spoke in shock. "you're so grown up. you look just like your mother at your age".

i didn't respond with any emotion. i kept my hands on my lap and allowed him to do all the talking because i had nothing to say. well, nothing nice any ways.

"so, um, how have you been? whenever i text you, you never reply. but it's okay, i change my number a lot" he explained. "i was wondering if you could give me nathan's number too, so that i can—".

"why now?" i abruptly cut him off.

i couldn't hold it in. i just needed to get this off my chest before this day moves any further.

"what?" he questioned, chuckling to lighten the moment.

"why did you want to meet now, today? of all days. because if it's money that you want, ya know for drugs" i dug into my purse and took out a few bills. "then here. i have enough for heroin, coke, ecstasy, i don't really remember which one was your favourite".

i could feel people starting to look over at my dad and i whilst i stared him down. he glanced at a few of them and awkwardly gave them a smile.

"no, no, i don't want your money" he denied. "i haven't been in los angeles for a while and when i knew i was coming, my first instinct was to contact my daughter".

i scoffed at his words.

"i missed you, dakota" my dad added.

"then why didn't you come back sooner? it's been four years!" i helplessly exclaimed. "where have you been?".

"everywhere really. every city, every state" he informed.

a smile started to grow on his face as i wondered what he could possibly find amusing about this situation.

"i landed in mexico once" he began to tell. "and when i was there, i saw this authentic burrito restaurant that instantly reminded me of you. remember on your birthdays, how i'd always take you to that burrito place? what was it called again?".

i had the name of the restaurant in my head. i can't believe that he still remembers that. and at this point, i could have easily blurted out the answer like an excited child, but i held myself back.

"...francisco's" i calmly replied.

"we went there so much that the owner made sure that you always got special treatment on your birthday".

i nodded as i remembered the goof memories. "they even named my favourite burrito after me".

my dad chuckled, "yes, yes. i remember that".

for some reason, i was starting to smile too until i remembered that these good times were just memories. memories that have covered up the bullshit that he's put us through.

"well, i haven't been there since my twelfth birthday and we didn't know where you were on my thirteenth" i mentioned, causing his shoulders to drop.

"actually now that i think about it, we did go on my fourteenth birthday, but you were high off your head that i'm sure you don't remember" i continued.

my dad let out a sigh and scratched the back of his neck.

"look, i've made many mistakes in the past, dakota and i'm sorry for that, but i'm trying to clean up my act".

"yeah, right" i muttered.

"i'm your father, there's no way that i could have forgotten about my little girl. i had to contact you every now and then to make sure that you and everyone else were okay. and when you don't reply, it worries me because i just assume the worse".

most deadbeat parents wouldn't even bother to check up on us when they can. but he does...well, at least he tries.

"then why don't you ever find out for yourself though? by sticking around and actually visiting us every now and then" i retorted, then my voice began to a whisper. "...we've missed you".

his eyebrows raised, "we?".

"mom and nate".

"is that what nathan calls himself now?".

i nodded, "yeah, he's changed too. he's so much taller, he has a sleeve tattoo now".

"nathan?!" he recalled in surprise.

i laughed to myself, "yeah, he tries to hold this whole bad boy vibe. you should see it. i mean, it's funny at times because i know he's a big softy at heart".

my dad turned in his seat to face me more, evidently growing my comfortable as i stopped being so hostile.

"and your mother?" he inquired. "still beautiful as ever?".

"yes. she's got a promotion at work last year actually, so that's helped a bit of money come through for college and stuff".

"what about your friends? what were their names again? jonah and then forsythe's son, um, liam?".

"they're great, jonah and i are still as close as ever" i replied. "liam and i are closer now too".

"as in together?".

"what? no, no" i quickly corrected, practically laughing at the thought.

he pointed at me in shock, "i saw that, your smile. so liam is your boyfriend".

"no, dad. i swear he's not!" i tried to say. "we're just best friends".

he chuckled, tilting his head to the side in awe, "...it's great to hear you call me dad".

i didn't even notice that the word slipped from my tongue, but i smiled back at him any ways.

"now, do you want a drink?" he stood up and dug into his pockets. "hot chocolate, it's on me".

"actually, i'll have a coffee".

"really?" he furrowed his brows in confusion.

"i'm eighteen now, dad".

he laughed, "right. and i'll get you a slice of chocolate cake and a cookie for later too".

i nodded with obvious excitement, before he left for the counter to order our food and drinks.

i was glad that things were going so well now. i don't know, maybe this could turn into a regular thing. meeting my dad once every few weeks just to catch up and at least feel like i do have two parents.

for almost another hour, we sat with our food and drinks, speaking about what he missed throughout the years and he told me many stories about the places that he's been to.

just before i was about to speak, a random man knocked on the window in front of us, aiming to get the attention of my dad.

he was covered up in a hoodie and looked slightly on edge as he urgently tapped the watch on his wrist.

"who's that?" i asked.

"no one, ignore him" dad quickly said.

although, the man outside continued to knock on the window until my dad got up from his seat.

"one second" he touched my shoulder, then left the cafe to confront the man.

i watched them have a heated conversation, almost yelling at each other back and forth and occasionally pointing at me. the man soon handed my dad the spare black hoodie in his arms, before he came back inside the cafe.

"everything okay?" i inquired, silently praying that it was.

"i have to go" he let out a breath.

"what? why?".

"it's a long story, i wish i could stay and explain but i have to get back on the road" he told as he began to put on the hoodie that he was handed.

"but...but you can't just leave".

"i'm sorry dakota".

at that moment, a small bag dropped out of his pocket and he took no time to pick it up and hide it in his hands before i could react.

i wasn't blind. i knew what it was, i've seen it before and i just can't believe that i fell for his fatherly act again.

i'm just so stupid. i tried my best to be angry and i could have exploded right in his face, but my emotions got the best of me.

i just stared at him with so much hurt in my eyes and tried looking into his for any remorse or a father who cares for his daughter even the slightest bit. but nothing.

at this point, i could feel my body begin to shake as my eyes welled up with tears.

"dakota, this is not what you think, okay" he tried to explain.

but i didn't give him the time to as i rushed out of the cafe and began running down the street with tears clouding my sight.

once i ran as far as i could, i stopped by a nearby wall and caught my breath for a second with my hands resting on my knees. i wiped my falling tears and tried to compose myself, then contacted an uber to drop me home.

i managed to cry silently the whole way home and i was surprised that the driver didn't ask me if i was okay. but it's not as if i would tell him the real reason any ways.

i stepped out of the car outside my house and wiped my eyes one last time incase my mom or nate started asking questions.

"hey dakota!".

i turned around and saw adrianna standing across the road outside jack's house with johnson, seriyah and jack himself.

great, this is just what i needed.

"hey" i lightly waved.

"are you okay?" seriyah asked with a look of concern over her face.

i nodded with a smile, "yeah, fine".

beside her, i could see jack looking at me with his eye slightly squinted as if he was trying to figure something out.

"um, maybe we could catch up next week" adrianna suggested. "hang out just us three, and i promise that crystal won't find a way to show up".

i've never hung out with them alone unless i was at one of connor or sam's parties or with jack at least there too.

"yeah, maybe" i replied, then turned to head to my front door before the conversation could continue further.

when i unlocked the door, thankfully no one was home. i went upstairs to my room to lay down on my bed and i couldn't help but cry again as i thought back to my dad and how he managed to disappoint me again.

he's not worth this though. there's no way that he's worth me, spending my afternoon crying about how shit of a father he is.

i rose back up from my bed and pulled my hands down my face to clear my tears. i moved to my window to open it a little, so that i could get some fresh air but i got distracted when i noticed jack crossing the road.

i wiped my eyes again to make sure that i was seeing correctly, and i was. he was coming straight towards my house.

it's been so long since i've spoken to him and i know that i said i moved on, but a part of me was hoping that he'd knock on my door right now, and i'd vent and cry to him for hours.

for some reason, he's the only person that i feel comfortable telling about what happened today.

however, my shoulders dropped with disappointment when jack paused on my lawn and scratch the back of his head. he looked up at my window, but i quickly hid to act like i wasn't just watching him.

i glanced back slyly and he was walking back across the road. he opened his front door and glimpsed back at mine, before going in like nothing happened.

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