Eat food, drink water, and get 5+ hours of sleep today or the green mulleted ant rabbit bird hybrid furry will haunt all your dreams

(Me who very rarely actually has dreams: Haha! No food, water, or sleep for me 😄)

And then we murdered the ants and we all lived happily ever after. The end.

(Ending it there would've been fun-)

Nah, that would require me to do actual work. We all know I'm to lazy to do that.

Anywhore, we went looking for these ant hybrid insects. I was already very useful by suggesting the N.G.L., so I'm not going to be any help.

Where is Kalluto getting those ice cream cones? Dave has to be around here somewhere..

Wait what- I've heard of birds delivering letters, but a bee?

"What does it say?" Killua asked.

"We were right, the Chimera ant queen is here. It'll be risky. Are you sure you want to come along?" Kite replied. You literally cannot get rid of us. If I died I would crawl out of hell to come back and annoy you. You cannot escape.

"Obviously. If we're gonna take over the world we need to get rid of any competition. Like a man in a penguin costume becoming the president." Gon stated.

"...That's a weird example." Obviously someone doesn't watch the presidential elections.

"You aren't going to get rid of us that easily old man." Killua added.

"Old man- whatever. Just stay safe." Kite said.

"Aw, you do care."

"Kalluto, you're grounded for another week."

"Fine ...dad."

"Two weeks."

"Ouch. Am I you're least favorite child?"

"Of course not- ...three weeks."

"But dadddd."

"Kill me. Kill me now."

"Are we ignoring the man in a penguin costume becoming the president?"

"We'll it was either the man in a penguin costume, or the penguin in a man costume."

"I- what?"

"It's still better than the U.S. elections." Jinx stated. Thank you for speaking facts.

"We should get going then. Miss translator, I'm sorry, but we really must hurry." Kite informed. When did that person get there? I'm very observant guys. Trust me.

"Right. I'm sure the horses can go a bit faster if it's necessary." Random person replied.

"They still won't be fast enough. Stick, Podungo, I want you two to return to the border and rendezvous with the others. Then call the association." Kite said.

"Alright. Be careful Kite."

"I will. You four keep up or I'll leave you behind."

Bruh, we're running? I'm just gonna teleport to y'all in a couple of minutes. I cannot be bothered to do exercise.

About 30 minutes later Ig

"Hullo- why is there a huge puddle of blood?" I asked.

"A dead body was here, idiot." Killua replied.

"...But like, where did the body go?"

"How would I know!?"

"I don't know, you got here before me!"

"We'll maybe if you actually ran with us we would've gotten here at the same time!"

"That's a lot of work!"

"You'll both be grounded if you continue fighting." Kite threatened. What are you gonna ground me from? ...Never mind, there's actually a lot you can ground me from.

"Sorry dad."

"Apologies father."

"Stop trying to one up me!" Killua shouted. Haha, never.

"Killua, Y/n." And we're screwed.

"Haha... Sorry?"

"You're both grounded for two weeks."

"Fuck."

"Damnit."

"Now, back to work. It's safe for us to assume that the chimera ants have taken full control of the NGL's interior. The only question now is whether we can reach the nest before the queen has a chance to give birth to the king." Kite informed.

"Wait- king?" What did I miss? There's more competition?

"..."

"..."

"As I was saying, before I was so rudely interrupted-" Kite started to say, before ...that thing cut him off.

"Hey!" No, seriously, what is that?"

"Bitch- ...What the actual fuck is that?"

"What in the rabbit bird furry ass shit?"

"What the fuck."

"When I heard 'Chimera ants' I thought we were going up against insects, not whatever the fuck this is."

"Yeah, what the hell is that thing?"

"Keep away from my prey!" Rabbit bird furry shouted. Are you talking about the horses impaled on the trees? Just get McDonald's bro, it's much easier.

"Gon, Killua, and Kalluto, this one's all yours. Take care of him." Kite said. I love being a god, I don't have to fight weirdos. Like that guy who ate hair, or this hybrid thing.

"I say we blow him up!"

"Yeah, toss a bomb in his mouth!"

"No, set him on fire!"

"Or freeze him!"

"...'Cause you're hot then you're cold.."

"'Cause you're hot then you're cold! You're yes then you're no! You're in then you're out! You're up then you're down! You're wrong when it's right! It's black and it's white! We fight, we break up! We kiss, we make up! You don't really want to stay, no! But you don't really want to go! You're hot then you're cold! You're yes then you're no! You're in then you're out! You're up then you're down!"

Ah yes, from murder plans to Katy Perry.

"Goddamnit! Stop fooling around and fight me already!"

"I'm sorry. I can't take a rabbit bird hybrid seriously, especially with those clothes-" Killua replied.

"This guy would not survive middle school. He'd instantly get bullied." Kalluto added.

"No seriously, what the actual fuck is that? Hey, furry bitch! What are you?" Killua asked.

"When I said 'Take care of him' I meant a fight, not insults." Kite muttered.

"Okay, but honestly, nobody can take fighting this hybrid furry thing seriously." I replied.

"Fair."

"Fine, if you're not going to attack I will!" Rabbit bird thing yelled.

He then got a bomb tossed in his mouth. He was warned.

"You bastards! I'll kill you!"

"We'll that hurts my feelings, now we're both in the wrong." Gon replied.

The ...whatever that is, did not like getting a bomb tossed in his mouth apparently.

"Ill eat you! I swear on my life!"

...where the fuck did they get gasoline? Never mind, I'm not gonna question it. Anywhore, the bird thing was set on fire.

*Inaudible sounds of a rabbit bird hybrid furry thing burning to death*

"I'd say we could roast marshmallows, but I don't want my food near that thing." Kalluto said. Do you just consume unhealthy amounts of unhealthy food and talk about unhealthy food all day?

I still need to figure out where Dave is... there isn't any ice cream shops here, meaning he's currently homeless. I need to make fun of him.

Good news: The rabbit thing is dead, the fire didn't kill him, but the children used him as a piñata, which did kill him.

More good news: We started a fire and made s'mores.

Even more good news: We burnt down like half a forest. A is for arson. (I need more of Arson alphabet)

Bad news: Apparently there's more of those hybrid furry things.

Good news: I didn't have to fight any of them. Killua, Gon, Kalluto, and Kite however... oh well, sucks to be them.

"Why do we have to fight them. Hey Y/n, can't you just kill all of the ants at one?" Gon whined.

"They're not going to because they're lazy." Killua said. Le gasp, rude. I'm not going to kill them all now. I wasn't going to anyways, but I'm definitely not going to now.

"Bruh it's fine, they're all pretty weak. I mean you killed one with a stick." I stated. You might've had to hit it with said stick around a thousand times, but you still killed it with a stick.

"And some fire." Gon mentioned.

"Don't forget about the bomb."

"I guess they are weak. We don't need your help." Killua admitted. That's great because I wasn't planning on helping.

"Interesting." Where the fuck did that human cat thing come from?

"...We'll now you've Jinxed it." I said.

"You talked about them being weak first!" Killua shouted.

"That's besides the point-"

"Can you both stop arguing for one minute. There's literally an enemy right in front of us." Kite sighed.

"Fine."

"Hey Siri, set a timer for one minute."

Word count: 1482 (Close enough- I'm just not trying at all-)

Fun Facts:

• There's no offense to furies here, I personally think furries are pretty fucking cool.

• I'm rewatching the Chimera ant arc as I write and I just now noticed that like 90% of the arc is following the Chimera ants- Episode 76 was the start of the Chimera ant arc and I'm on episode 85 right now- I've only been writing this arc since chapter 84- wtf-

• Dave is around the island somewhere, selling ice cream to the Chimera ants... the ants that don't tip get brutally murdered. The chimera ants think that he's a god, he has received many gifts. The chimera ants are sacrificing humans to him.