(A/n- I've never been on a date- no idea how this shit goes- it's fine tho, I mean it's not actually a date, right? [it totally is])

BeepBeepBeepBee-SLAM

Stupid alarm clock... oh shit, my date- not date, with Illumi is today. I immediately get up, getting ready.

(Outfit can be whatever, probably something more casual. Not having a jacket is preferred-)

✨After Getting Ready✨

"You look nice." Illumi commented.

"Thanks, you do to." I respond.

"..."

"..."

"So, what are we doing?" Illumi questions.

"Getting you an ice cream cone is top priority." I state, leading the way.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"So, where are we going exactly?" Illumi asks.

"I saw an ice cream truck on the way here." I respond.

"..."

"..."

"I thought you didn't go into free candy vans..." Illumi muttered.

"It's an ice cream truck." I correct.

"What's the difference?" Illumi asks. You absolute idiot.

"It isn't free, it's ice cream, and you don't go in it."

"It's free if you steal it, same thing, and how do they serve ice cream then?"

"We aren't stealing it, no it isn't , and they go in the truck, you don't go in it!"

"Why not, fine, and why not?"

"Just shut up..."

"Because I'm right?"

"No- whatever, sure." I reply, causing Illumi to let out a hum of satisfaction.

✨At the Truck✨

"So what's so good about ice cream anyways?" Illumi asks. I feel sorry for you.

"It's amazing, you just have to try it." I reply.

"Hello! What can I get for you today?" The ice cream man asks.

"One chocolate ice cream cone and..." What did Illumi want?

"Make it two chocolate ice cream cones." Illumi stated.

"Here you go! Have fun on your date!" The ice cream man said, handing us our ice cream cones.

"Oh, we're not-" I attempted to correct him, but I was cut of by Illumi.

"We will." Illumi responded.

"Seriously?" I ask, now walking away from the ice cream truck.

"You don't want to go on a date with me?" Illumi asks, faking being hurt.

"No." I respond.

"Ouch." Illumi says, staring at his ice cream cone.

"You don't know how to eat it, do you?" I ask.

"..."

"I'll take that as a yes, just lick it.. or bite into it if you're crazy enough." I explain, causing Illumi to instantly bite into it.

"..."

"..."

"My head hurt." Illumi says, causing me to burst out laughing.

"That's a brain freeze." I explain, after I stopped laughing at him.

"So don't bite into it?"

"Don't bite into it."

Many brain freezes later

"Where are we going next?" Illumi asks.

"The zoo." I respond.

"Slow down, my head still hurts." Illumi complained.

"You shouldn't have ate ice cream so fast then!"  I reply.

"It's not my fault it was good!"

"You had eight in the time I had one!"

"It was good!"

"I know!"

"Then why are we yelling then?" Illumi questions.

"I don't know." I respond.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"So, the zoo?" Illumi asks, breaking the awkward silence.

"Yeah." I reply.

At the Zoo

"..."

"..."

"So, what are they in there for?" Illumi asks.

"This isn't a prison." I reply.

"Then can they leave?" Illumi questions.

"Well no, but- oh shit."

"I bet that one murdered someone." Illumi said, pointing at a goat.

"That one definitely is in there for arson." I add, pointing at a different goat.

"Vandalism." Illumi said, pointing at a meerkat.

"DUI." I state, pointing at a giraffe.

"Mass murder." Illumi added, pointing at a bird.

"Tax-evasion."

"Murder."

"Arson."

"Kidnapping."

"Theft."

"Assault."

"Murder."

"Armed robbery."

"Burglary."

"Terrorism."

"Abuse."

"Arson."

"Theft."

"Mass murder."

"DWI."

"DUI."

"Vandalism."

"Fraud."

(SpongeBob narrator voice)
A few hours later

"I guess this is a prison." I state.

"Told you." Illumi responds.

"Can't believe that red panda murdered someone, I trusted him." I add, wiping away fake tears.

"You only knew him for five minutes, me and that black panther were basically life long friends." Illumi replies, also wiping away fake tears.

"I may have only known him for a couple minutes, but I trusted him with my life." I respond.

"Honey let's get away from those crazy people.." A mother whispered, dragging their kid away.

"..."

"..."

I burst out laughing, Illumi was calmer but I could tell he was attempting not to smile.

"I- give me- a- second." I choke out, still dying of laughter.

A few minutes later

"Alright, I can breathe now." I state, now done laughing.

"We should go see a movie." Illumi suggests, following me out of the zoo.

"Alright." I respond, now following Illumi.

⭐️At the Movie Theater💧

"Hello, what can I do for you today?" The ticket person asked.

"Two tickets to Harry Potter." I reply.

"Alright! That'll be (amount)" Illumi payed for the tickets, and the food, which I'm not complaining, free food is the best food.

We sat down in the theater, that had a surprisingly large amount of teenagers. I should start a cult...

"Whatever you're thinking about doing, don't." Illumi said. Ha, not like that'll stop me! I grab a couple pieces of paper and a pen, (don't ask where they came from) earning me a confused look from Illumi.

'We all should scream when Hermione comes on screen' I wrote on the papers, tossing the notes to the groups of teenagers.

'Sure' The first note was tossed back, earning a confused glance from Illumi.

'Won't we get kicked out?' The second note came back. I wrote 'It'll be fun plus we'll all get kicked out together!' And tossed the note back.

'Alright' The third note came back. Damn they're either really slow writers or took forever to decide.

'Fine' The second note was tossed back again. Perfect phase one of start a cult complete.

When Hermione came on screen everyone started screaming, causing Illumi to give me an 'are you serious' look.

"You're all going to have to be quiet or we'll kick you out, now who started this all?" An employee asked, luckily nobody snitched.

"Fine, just don't do it again." The employee said, leaving the room. Long story short, we did it again, and got kicked out. Some parents were talking to the employees about letting them back in, leaving about fifteen of us in the lobby to wait.

"That was hilarious!" One of the teenagers said.

"Yeah, I'm gonna get grounded though." Another teenager complained.

"Ever heard the saying go big or go home?" I asked, causing all attention to go to me.

"What do you have in mind?" Someone asked.

"There's a 7-11 across the street, might as well raid it." I respond, smirking.

"I'm in."

"No way!"

The teenagers were about fifty-fifty about going or not.

"I'm leaving, you either stay here and get in trouble, or follow me and get in more trouble later." I state, walking toward the exit.

Many teenagers instantly started following, causing the teenagers who wanted to 'fit in' to follow as well, abandoning only two people at the theater.

"There's thirteen of us in total, so let's start some chaos." I state.

"Yeah!" The teenagers yelled, following me into the 7-11. Phase two complete.

"...here comes trouble." The cashier muttered underneath their breath after seeing us.

"Grab what you want." I say, causing the group to go wild.

"Everyone got everything?" I ask, after everyone had lined up at the front. Everyone nodded or let out a little "mhm".

"Perfect, now run!" I yell, running out of the store. The group quickly followed, not knowing what else to do.

"Heads up I'm calling the police! I need to keep this job, sorry!" The cashier yelled. Thanks for the warning, I guess?

"What do we do now!?" Some yelled, still following me.

"We run from the cops, obviously!" Another person yelled back.

"I'm not going to run from the cops!"

"Then hide from them!" I replied, easy fix.

"How are we supposed to hide from the cops!?" Someone yelled back.

"By hiding, I know a place we can stay if you follow me!" I shout back. People followed me, some people ran out of breath and tried to find their own hiding spot instead.

"We're here." I say, leading them inside an abandoned building.

"Follow someone you don't know inside an abandoned building, sounds completely safe." Someone mumbled.

"Safer then getting caught by the cops, my mom will kill me." Someone whispered back.

"Technically, we have food so we could stay here a couple of days, then say we were kidnapped." Another person mentioned.

"I have a knife on me, I could take someone hostage for dramatic effect." I add.

"That just might work."

"Perfect, so uhhh, why were you all at the theater?" I ask, damn my socially awkward self!

"Hanging out with friends." Someone replied, a couple of people, who I assume are there friends, nodded.

"A reward for getting straight A's" Someone else replied. Well now you're just bragging..

"Also hanging out with friends."

"Cool." I reply.

"So why were you at the theater?" Someone questioned.

"On a date." I respond. Wait- well no point in correcting myself now.

"You just abandoned him?" Someone else questioned.

"Yeah." I reply.

"Was he ugly?"

"No, eight or nine out of ten." I replied.

"And you abandoned him!?" Someone shouted, instantly covering their mouth.

"I asked him if he wanted to go, he said he'll just watch the movie."

"So hot but a douche?" Someone questioned.

"Nah, hot but knows I do stupid shit." I reply.

"Oh, so what's everyone else's dating life like?" Someone asked, finally directing the conversation away from me.

"Absolute shit." Everyone has basically the same response.

"..."

"..."

"Anyone here ever murder someone?" I ask.

"My mother died in childbirth?" Someone responded.

"I wish my mother died in childbirth." I replied, a couple people agreeing.

"You ever murder anyone?" Some asked me.

"Yeah, I'm an assassin." I reply, causing some people to scoot away from me, and most people to leave entirely.

"..."

"..."

"We should exchange numbers." Someone else mentioned.

"Sure." I said, starting to exchange numbers with the four other remaining people.

"I'll create a groupchat." I stated.

🛐🛐🛐Cult🛐🛐🛐

✨Y/n✨ has created a new groupchat
4 people are now online
4 people have changed their name

✨Harou✨
What's with the groupchat name-

✨Y/n✨
Idk- it's fitting?

✨Anzai✨
Okay-

✨Shuko✨
Who's the cult leader-

✨Anzai✨
Oldest??

✨Y/n✨
Why aren't we talking irl-

✨Urara✨
Idk-

Irl

"I have no idea who people are." I mention.

"Im Harou." A guy said, biting into his sandwich.

"I'm Shuko!"

"Anzai"

"Urara"

"Nice, I'm Y/n."

Word count: 1813

Fun Facts:

• Illumi went on a date before Killua- just thought i should point this out.

• Illumi didn't allow you to pay for anything. I believe Illumi would be quite the gentleman, mainly because his mother forced him to be.

• Illumi was technically abandoned, but the date shall continue!

(Also, would you like character information??)