// thanks to numba1lonelykid for the ideas! The chapter with Izuku's father might take awhile im doing these firsts lol

1.) Salt line

Katsuki stared as Shoto take a spoonful of whatever he's eating into his mouth again

"What the heck are you eating, sugar? You'd get diabetes from that"

"This isn't sugar, this is Salt"

"You'd get kidney failure from that"

"trust me it's very easy to get a donor" Katsuki scrunched up his face

"How do you even enjoy shit like that?"

"It tastes delicious to me I do not understand"

"You probably got some shit that doesn't allow you to taste salty shit, no one in their right mind would eat that"

"I'm in my right mind and I'd eat it" Katsuki stared at him a bit more before smirking and grabbing the container from him, Shoto glared at him annoyed

"What are you doing?"

"Let's go do some demon hunting with these"

________

"Katsuki"

"Yes?"

"All you literally did is put a salt line infront of the door, how do you expect to demon hunt with these?"

"I don't know, but hey whoever can't get through this door is certainly not a human, let's catch those who can't pass through! Call all your friends!"

"The only friend that I know of is that pokepiece of shit"

"Call him"

PokeBall : hey come over

PokemonHo : but why??????

PokeBall : Katsuki wants to meet you

PokemonHo : Really dude???? You mean that crazy guy who ate scotch tape and bit your cheek???

PokeBall : yah

PokeBall : Izuku's here too

PokemonHo : Seaweed child!!!!!!!!

PokemonHo : Omw!!!!!!

____________

It didn't take long before they heard laughter of two people from just outside the door, they heard a knock

"Come in!" They said

Izuku opened the door revealing him and Kaminari just outside, they both were about to step in before they both sent backwards hissing

"What the heck?! Why the heck would you put a salt line on the entrance of your room! Not cool Pokebro!" Kaminari hissed, tossing the shoe with salt on it faraway, Izuku growled and went as far as punching the window on the wall behind them open, sending a large gust of wind to blow the salt away before crawling into the room with inhumane speeds that should not be possible and pouncing on both of them like a predator to a prey

"W̵̵̙̜̭̕͞͝H̸̷̴̡̼̰̮̘̜̦̺̻̩͡ͅĄ̴̡͉̯̱̗̹̞̲̺̠̞͉̫͇̦́T̷̷͞͏̪̮͔̥͔̙̜͖͕͕ ̢̛͜҉̥̣̠̤̪͢W̸҉̮̫͚̰̱͙͝E҉̧͇̣̩͓̠̦̮̲̜̳̳̠͎͜͢R͇͔͚̖̪͘̕͡È̶͕̱̱̞̳̩̮̬̖̞̜̘͈̤̭̹͈̕͝͡ ̡̩̦̺̣Y̸̧͖̙̣̜̤̹͕͖͈̞͘͝O͕̜̲̗̲͘͢͟Ư͏̹̬̻͈̳̱̹̜̬͕̱̼͇̞ ̶̷̧̼̘̝͍̱̲̹͎B̷̨̯̫̫̪̰͍̦̩̹̣͠ͅͅO̶̷̢̤̮̠͓͉̕Ţ̴͓̝̩̲͙͙̼̖̗̯̜͚̝͎͍̗̻̦͘͜͞H̡͕̰̜̩̝̮͔̣̜̹͚͖̺̬̤͍̣̥ ̶̶̯̺̩̤͚̺͔̰̘̹̼̮̕Ț̛̗̦͉͘͞H̢̛̯̩͔̘̮̲̫̮̜̯͚͚̮͖͓͔͟͝͞I̷̳̞͈̖̹̰͚̥͔̹̥͔͢͜ͅN͟͏̧̹͓̱̰͜ͅͅK͏҉҉̪͈̯͇̲̭̳̦̦̫̞I̵̸̮̳̦̖̹͔͓̝͉̬̫ͅŅ̸͉̥̠̥̥͖͇̗̳̗̣̩͚̩̗̹͕͜͞ͅG̴̣̱̥̬̱̭̝͜" Izuku said, his message barely audible

"W-What? I-Izuku" Shoto stammered, despite the situation he was blushing like an idiot, Kaminari stared at them from above

"I̧̿ͯ ̸͛̔̾̈́̽T̴̡ͧ̓ͦ̄ͣ̈H̨̧ͩ̂͑ͮOͫU̓ͬͦ͢G͊ͪͬ͆̅̑̀͢H̨ͭ̉ͯ̍̍͑̐͠T̨̔̋͒̊̈̕҉ ̶̧ͫ͐W̎̈ͪ̃́ͧE̶͗ͨͦ̂̉̋ͧ̽͝ ̛͂͆̾͊̈́ͮ͂͑̓̕̕W̧̔̄̋́ͫ̄͗̕E̴̛͌̀͒ͥ͒̊͑͏R͆̐ͧ̈́̾̾E̒ͦ̐ͭ́ͯ͞ ̷ͭ̃ͪ̐ͨ̽͒͞B̵ͤ̍ͣ̍ͩ̕R̷͊ͭ̓̾͝Ơͮ̽̀̃͝͡S̴̓͊ͭ̔ͧ́͢ ̴ͭ̎̈̄ͬ̓̐͞W͒̚͘͝Hͧ̿Ý͊͗ͫ ̄҉̸D̀̑̎͗ͣ͂ͨI̵̽̓́̚͟D͂ͬͬ̌̆ͨ̈́ͬ̑́̕͝ ͛͗͛͛ͬ̈́͗́͞Y̷͆̏̇͐̈̾̑̌O̢̾͒̓͑ͬ̅̀͆Ū͛̚ ͪ̂ͦ͑D̔ͮ͗̉ͮͬ̚Ö̷́ͦͫ̉͞ ̨̨͆̑̋ͩ͐̉͆͑T̡ͥͮ͂̿͐ͣ̄̄̚̕H̒̃̓Aͬ͂͆ͬͨ́҉̀T̨̡ͭͪ͂̅ͣ͘" atleast his voice was easier to understand

"Why the heck are you both acting like that, it's just a salt line! It was supposed to keep away... demons" Katsuki said his eyes widening, Izuku's eyes widened too before he covered both their faces with his hands and almost instantly the both were asleep

"Geeze, do they do this kinda thing often?"

"Not really, they tried a ghost radar on me once, I exploded it though" Kaminari's eyes shined

"Cool!"

"Why do you think we're affected by the salt line though? We still are just humans.. well I'm sure I'm human, what about you?" Kaminari shrugged

"Maybe the salt gods are just salty that we're cooler than them"

"Hmm, either way, let's do this again"

_____________

Shoto and Katsuki groaned as they sat up

"Dude I think we accidentally fell asleep while waiting for them" Shoto said

"No shit- oh look someone's knocking, COME IN!"

Kaminari opened the door and trudged in , Izuku followed after him

"Hey guys? Whatcha up to? I heard a certain blond is interested in me!" Kaminari wiggled his eyebrows, Katsuki groaned

"Well whatever, do what you want I got a throbbing headache" Kaminari grinned and crashed on their bed before falling asleep almost as soon as he hit the mattress

"Ah! Kacchan are you okay?" Izuku said and ran to his side

"Mhmm Fine, I just feel weird, you know I had a dream that you were a demon, it was a real weird dream"

"E-Eh? Me as a demon?" Izuku pouted, his skill was supposed to make them forget entirely about him! "Geeze Kacchan... do you think of me in that way...?" He said his eyes tearing up, Katsuki panicked

"Of course not! W-Why would I think of you in that way? U-Uh... Kaminari was a demon too in my dream? Ugh I don't remember my memory is foggy" Izuku frowned, right, Kaminari was here too, that might be why...

"What about me? Aren't you gonna ask if I'm okay too?" Shoto asked

"O-Oh um... are you okay Shoucchan?"

"I'm perfectly fine, in my dream you were an angel!" Shoto said with stars in his eyes even though his face is as blank as ever, Izuku doesn't know why Shoto's memory of him altered into an angel, it was just supposed to make it seem like a dream, oh well he'd take it over being accused as a demon, he blushed shyly and smiled

"T-Thank you Shoucchan!"

___________________________

2.) Phone that speaks to the dead

Todoroki was happily munching on his healthy greens until he felt something touch his foot, he looked down under the table and stumbled backwards, he almost got a heart attack, under the table was Bakugou looking up at him with the most sickest grin and the most menacing eyes he has ever seen, Jesus fuckin Christ

"Heeeeeey shitstain guess what I got?" Katsuki smirked as he climbed on top of the poor fallen teen, god why couldn't Izuku suddenly switch place with Katsuki in this moment? He would be sooooo happy

"What did you get- and let me guess, you used my credit card again"

"Oh you know me well don'tcha you half assed Canadian flag? Look at this shit!" He said before shoving a phone on the poor teens face

"... It's a phone, you just bought yourself a new phone with my money?!"

"Dude no! It's a phone that speaks to dead people, we like that shit yeah?"

"I guess we do... do I need to know the price?"

"The cheapest one yet"

"Considering how expensive the other two yet, I still don't want to know it's price" Katsuki grinned, got off him and pulled him up

"Just for once, I'll let you try it first, this time you should be able to understand it completely"

"Oh wow thanks, I don't have to rely on you anymore I feel like an independent kid" Shoto said taking the phone away from Katsuki, he placed it on his ear

"N i c e A s s" Shoto froze

"L e m m e s q u e e z e y o u r m a n p e c s"

"Y o u s m e l l l i k e m y d e a d b o y f r i e n d"

"Ah... is this what you keep on hearing at that ghost radar?" Katsuki looked at him confused

"They being perverted little shits? Because if so then yeah, that's what I've been hearing"

"I'm sorry for the time when I wanted to know what it meant, thank you for not telling me"

"Your welcome shitface"

____________________

They were at Shoto's room now fiddling with the phone

"What else can you do with this phone?"

"Well if you say the name of someone dead, they'd answer the call"

"Oh, not alive?"

"Hell Yeah!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah just for proof gimme that" Katsuki said snatching the phone away from him "I'm gonna call Midoriya's dad lol"

Katsuki pressed the phone unto his ear and said out loud " Hizashi Midoriya"

....

....

....

"Hello, who is this? I don't recognize the number at all.....How did you get through this number? It's private" Katsuki's eyes widened and Shoto looked at him concerned

"What happened?" Shoto asked, Katsuki covered his mouth

"H-Hey! Hi Midoriya's mom- I mean dad!"

"Ah Katsuki! How did you get this number? Are you trying to prank call someone or something?"

"Something kinda like that...?"

"Well either way be careful! You almost gave me a heart attack kiddo, you gotta becareful on who you prank call since they can trace you back you know? Are you on a street phone right now? I can't trace you"

"Uh kinda? Yeah!"

"Well either way, I have to get back to work, be careful and tell Izuku I said hi okay? Bye"

"Bye Sir" the moment the phone dropped Katsuki collapsed on the bed breathing heavily and sweating

"You okay dude?"

"Dude I just talked with Satan, no I am not okay"

"Isn't he just Midoriya's dad?"

"He isn't just Midoriya's dad, he's the origin of all that is bad, he's the contents of Pandora's box, Jesus Christ I almost had a heart attack when he answered"

"You said this phone is only supposed to answer to the dead, correct me if I'm wrong but Hizashi Midoriya is still alive right?"

"Of course he is! That grown up piece of shit can't even die if he tried!"

"Well... I'm gonna try something out too"

"Huh?"

Shoto placed the phone in his ear and called out loud "Midoriya Izuku"

....

....

....

"Thank god he isn't answering-"

"Hello? Who's this?" And after a few moment "Shoucchan?" Shoto's eyes sparkled

"You truly are an angel... Izuku"

"U-Uh... t-thanks...? Um why are you calling me?"

"Nothing I just missed you"

"Do you want me to come over there?"

"Yes" Shoto said almost immediately

"Okay bye!" The phone dropped and Shoto collapsed

"I confirmed it, Izuku was an angel, that's why I dreamt of him as one"

"What the fuck?! That doesn't make sense you piece of shit, he isn't dead yet"

"A living angel..." his eyes sparkled, Katsuki groaned

"Hey... I wonder how the phone is gonna react once Izuku is over, he got that cult of ghosts following him around"

"I've looked at them in a new light, the souls of the dead are attracted to Izuku's bright light, that's the reason why"

"Whatever makes you happy you love stricken piece of shit"

__________________

They immediately knew that Izuku was near when the phone started making horrible screeches, it wasn't even near their ear it just started screaming at everything

"Izuku tends to plague a lot of bad spirits" Katsuki hissed and placed a bunch of pillows on the phone to stop it from being so loud, suddenly the door opened

"Hey guys-"

BOOM

"He didn't even have to touch it this time"

"Maybe if the stupid ghosts have shut up it wouldn't have exploded at all"

"Um guys?"

"Don't worry about it Izuku, were just trying out some horror shit" Izuku pouted

"Did you guys just make me come here to test that stuff again?"

"Yep"

"You guys are mean... I-I thought you guys actually missed me..." he said his eyes tearing up, Shoto stood up and held both his hands

"I missed you, don't worry about Katsuki he's an asshole anyways"

"Hey what the shit?!"

"See, come on I'll get you something to eat"

"Are you guys just ignoring me?!"

"O-Oh um.. okay Shoucchan!" Izuku smiled

"What about me?!"

"Oh you can just tag along or something lol" Shoto said dismissively

"Shoucchan! Don't be mean to Kacchan"

"I'll try not to" Katsuki groaned

Being a third wheel is hard