A U G U S T  1 9 7 6

.・。.・゜✭・.・✧・゜・。.

THE WARM AUGUST BREEZE mixed with the longer days was exactly what Clara loved about being home for the summer. Over the years, she would often sneak out onto the roof of Potter Manor just outside her bedroom window, reading until the sun had completely set and she was straining to see the words on the page any longer. Tonight was no different.

On this particular evening, she had decided upon reading 'The Great Gatsby' at her father's recommendation. They were the only pure-blood family she knew that openly read muggle literature and listened to muggle music. While it was taboo, she loved it and her father especially encouraged it. Midway through reading the first party scene at Jay Gatsby's mansion, the sound of her window opening made Clara jump. The book fell to the thatched roof with an unceremonious thump causing her to lose her page – and her patience. When she looked over to see the source of the noisy intrusion, she saw Sirius crawling out of her bedroom window.

"Can I help you?" she asked indignantly.

Though it had been nearly three weeks since Sirius had first arrived at the manor, the two of them kept their distance. Or at least Clara tried to.

On occasion, he and James would attempt some sort of humiliating prank on her, although Euphemia often intervened before things were taken too far. Most days, the boy were holed up in James's room, listening to muggle rock music and talking about only Merlin knows what. If they weren't doing that, they were most likely to be found out in the back garden practising Quidditch. Although practising usually meant James was trying to perfect a new technique while Sirius attempted to knock him off his broom at every turn for a laugh.

"I asked Prongs if he knew any good places to smoke where your parents wouldn't get upset and he told me they didn't know about you sneaking onto the roof." he explained, pulling the carton of cigarettes from his back pocket.

"So you decided to not only invade my space but to also do that disgusting habit near me?"

"Exactly." he said with a wink, placing a cigarette delicately between his lips.

Clara let out a disgusted groan as she picked up the book, flipping through the pages attempting to find the place where she had left off. A moment of silence fell between the two as she continued reading. Bitter smoke lingered around her like an early morning fog, though this particular kind of mist burned in the back of her throat unlike the first breath on a fresh summer's day. Sirius remained mostly silent, so even in her discomfort, she wasn't entirely annoyed by his presence.

"So, can we talk about what happened on the train then?" he asked casually, flicking the butt of his finished cigarette off into the distance.

Clara didn't know about Sirius, but she had grown quite comfortable with their unspoken agreement to pretend she hadn't witnessed anything on the train. It came as a surprise to her that he seemed to want to talk about it at all. Folding a dog-ear on the page she was on to make sure she wouldn't lose her place this time, she then set the book aside and glanced at Sirius. Remembering how upset and dismissive he had been to her in that moment, she didn't want him to feel forced to open up to her just because she was James' sister and they were all momentarily living under the same roof.

"We don't have to if you don't want to." Clara offered.

"It's okay, I feel like I owe a bit of an explanation... and an apology."

All Clara could bring herself to do was nod. As she did, Sirius laid back on the roof, resting his hands behind his head. Clara assumed it was probably much easier for him to speak his mind into the vast nothingness of the faded orange sky, rather than to look into the hazel eyes that so vividly matched those of his best friend and bare his soul to her.

"My family's a lot different than yours. I assume you've gathered that by now."

She began to nod, but caught herself as he still avoided looking in her direction. Instead, she replied with a tentative, "Yes."

"My parents absolutely hate me, always have. It got worse once I started school and was placed into Gryffindor and when Reg was put into Slytherin... it was exactly what they wanted. They could finally pit my brother against me. He's their golden child, their Slytherin Prince. And I'm the disappointment."

Wordlessly, Clara decided to lay back against the roof as well. Resting her hands over her stomach, their shoulders barely touching, she watched the orange and pink tinted clouds float by as he continued on.

"I held on to this idea that maybe he'd see the light and follow me out of there as long as I stayed. I thought if I didn't leave him alone in that house, I could help him. But after our argument on the train, I realised that wasn't the truth. I was too late or I didn't try hard enough, I don't know. Either way, it wasn't getting any better once we got home." he explained.

Before he finished his story, Clara turned her head to face the boy whose eyes were still focused on the clouds above them. They were so close, she could still smell the tobacco that lingered on his breath. And though he refused to meet her gaze, she could clearly see the pained expression on his face. The way his brows furrowed tightly, the watery reflection of the sunset in his silver eyes, the bobbing of his throat as he fought back his emotions. Sirius really did care for Regulus, Clara had been right about that.

"I won't give you any of the details. There wasn't even really one huge incident that caused me to leave, just a million reasons building up over sixteen years."

"I'm sorry." Clara finally spoke, her voice wavering slightly.

"Don't be sorry for things you can't control." he replied flatly. It seemed like a mantra he had repeated to himself over and over again for years.

"Well, I'm just glad you're safe."

Sirius finally turned to face her, he cocked an eyebrow slightly with the smallest hint of a smirk playing at the corner of his lips. This close, she could see the faint flecks of gold hidden within his silver eyes, sparkling like stars. How fitting for a boy with his name.

"Don't go soft on me now, Potter." he teased.

Clara groaned at the return of Sirius' usual attitude and sat up to reach for her book, hoping he would take it as a hint to leave her alone and allow her to continue enjoying the last moments of daylight in peace.

"I'm sorry, by the way." he spoke, as he propped himself up on his hands, leaning back casually.

When she glanced up from the pages, he continued, "I shouldn't have yelled at you on the train like that. You really didn't deserve it. You didn't know what I was dealing with, so I know I shouldn't have lashed out at you and I'm sorry."

Hearing the words 'I'm sorry' leave Sirius' lips made her feel like she was sitting beside some sort of imposter. Never, in nearly six years of increasingly humiliating pranks, had he ever apologised to her. As he awaited her response, she wondered if he could notice the shock and confusion in her eyes.

"I appreciate that, Sirius. But I suppose it's somewhat my fault for being nosy, so I'm sorry for that." she replied.

Sirius raised his eyebrows, seemingly shocked by her own apology. But his face quickly relaxed into a smug grin, "Well, you make a valid point there. Maybe you did deserve it after all."

Clara's own expression fell into a frown and she immediately returned her attention back to her book. Even when they were being civil with each other, or coming close to a moment one could consider friendly, it always turned back into their usual back and forth bickering eventually.

"So, do you mind if we share this spot while I stay?" he asked, seemingly unfazed by her change in demeanour.

"Or you could just quit smoking. It'll kill you, you know."

"I could and I should." he admitted with a shrug, "But I probably won't."

"You're not giving me much of a choice in the matter are you?"

"No, not really." he shook his head with a grin.

Clara sighed as she admitted defeat, "Fine. But next time, climb through the window in my dad's study next door. I don't need you bothering me every time you want to smoke."

"Fair enough. I wouldn't want to catch you when you're indecent." he said with a wink before getting up to crawl back through her window.

Clearly unamused at the idea, Clara's lips pressed into a thin line, "I trust that you'd knock and not just barge in."

But the boy had already disappeared through the window, no doubt tuning out her voice and forgetting their heartfelt conversation. Instead, he'd be focusing on how best to annoy her for the rest of the summer holiday.

With a look at the sky, a sigh fell from Clara's lips. The sun was already too low to get lost in her book as she'd wished. Even the simplest pleasures in her life were ruined by Sirius Black. The sooner they could get back to Hogwarts and far away from each other, the better.