"Are you sure you don't want to borrow the lingerie I bought?" Julia asked as she zipped up the back of my dress, effectively trapping me inside this piece of clothing for the rest of the night because there was no way was I getting out of it. It was extremely tight but because of its navy blue color and quarter long sleeves, it wasn't too suggestive, "I haven't worn it yet so it's still fresh."

"I'm sure," I breathed out, using her shoulder as support to step into my heels, "And I'm not going to consider it as anything, date or not."

The last time I allowed her crazy speculations get into my head, a huge mess came out of it – granted that it was Adam's fault for tricking me like that, but perhaps I wasn't innocent as well because I overthought all of it.

"Again, thank you for letting me borrow this," I said to Meg who was nodding while loudly chewing her apple. While Julia and I were in the midst of faffing around, she suddenly asked what the hell was I going to wear.

As you could guess, we ripped through my closet but we found nothing that I deemed appropriate and it wasn't like I could borrow anything from Julia since we were clearly different sizes.

So In the end, Meg volunteered to lend me a dress. I thought that it was too small but she said that it was made that way, making sure it hugged every single one of your curves.

I tried to refuse but she was insistent that I looked good in it and she was backed up by my own roommate.

"You two are going out on dates and leaving me all alone," Meg pouted, leaning against the doorframe. Julia was asked out by a guy, that she met in the library if I might add which was a total meet cute, leaving Meg complaining that even though she was the only in an actual relationship among the three of us, she was the one who was going to have a lonely Friday night.

By this time, I was sick and tired of trying to convince them that I wasn't sure if this was an actual date or not.

If he says that it was one, I promised myself that I wasn't going to freak out. If he says that it wasn't, then I'm going to thank him for the friendly outing.

Was I hoping that it was a date? I had to admit that I was reaching more onto the 'yes' side.

He arrived just minutes before Julia's date did and instead of shocking me with flowers like the last time, it was only a small gesture of hello and an offer of his hand that he presented. Honestly, this was better because it kept my sanity intact. Although because it was like this, the arrow was now pointing towards the direction wherein it said that this wasn't a date.

My dress was covered by my coat and I actually used the whole car ride to decide whether I was daring enough to reveal it to him or not.

When he said fancy, it was really fancy to the point that they had a foyer area where you give your coats to this lady. My hands were shaking when I slowly slid it off my body and handed it to her. Afraid to look at Adam, I kept my eyes trained on my clutch while she gave us a tag and escorted us to the maître d'.

Adam said his name for the reservations and we were led to a booth that was private enough but was still seen by the rest of the people walking by, "So how'd you get us a table here?"

"Might have asked somebody to pull some strings," he admitted sheepishly, "But I think she was more excited than I was."

I raised a brow while the waiter filled up our glasses with water. He saw this and he was quick to correct himself, "This is by my own doing and decision, she did not influence this at all except for getting me the reservation."

He said it so stiffly and robotic that it was actually amusing.

Although we tried to ignore and forget about that small argument sparked by Heart's meddling, it hung in the air because it indeed happened and the only reason we were in this current situation was because he thought he had to make it up to me.

"I believe you," I smiled softly, taking the menu.

But I couldn't just forget what he made me go through.

I was expecting him to do the same, look awkwardly and discuss what we food we were getting to relieve a bit of tension, but what he did instead was take one good look at me before showing me the same smile I flashed him, "You look beautiful by the way."

Needless to say, I was back to being a flustered mess and this menu was the only thing that was stopping him from seeing the red blush on my face. Maybe now I'm going to promise myself be a little nicer to Meg as a thank you for pushing me into this outfit.

Maybe the people we don't exactly like will be the ones to make us step out of our comfort zone.

And maybe I should stop it with the philosophical gibberish.

"You've chosen what you want?" he asked and I gasped when I realized I took too much time in having an internal monologue to even flip through the menu. In order not to make such a complete fool of myself, I nodded and just told the waiter the first pasta dish that I saw, "That and a bottle of the chef's choice red wine."

As predicted, the bottle of wine came first. The waiter poured each of us a glass before setting it inside the bucket of ice next to our table. Adam raised his glass, "Here's to..."

His voice slowly died down, his eyes widening as if he realized just what he was about to say. I cleared my throat, finding this situation a bit compromising but I was determined to push through. So I simply ignored the lack of reason for the toasting and simply clinked our glasses together.

While he took a sip and his gaze fluttering around, perhaps of embarrassment or some other reason, I downed the whole glass. Thank heavens we were in a booth, can you imagine me doing that if we were seated in the middle?

But it did give me a jolt of confidence.

"May I clarify one thing so there would be no confusion on my part?" I questioned, waiting for him to nod before taking a deep breath, "Is this a date?"

Whoop, there it was.

He finally placed those brown eyes on me. It took him a while to answer, obviously hesitating. But when my shoulders slumped after not receiving a quick response, he finally replied, "And if it is?"

I may or may not hyperventilate but with the pep talk I've given myself earlier, we're leaning more on the latter so we're more or less safe right now, "I don't exactly know."

"Well, give me an opinion of this night at the end then I'll tell you if it's a date or not," he chuckled, allowing whatever nerves he had felt slowly melt away, and I had to be skeptical at that. Somehow, even if I knew he was joking, it was a free-way ticket out of embarrassment because if this doesn't go well, he'll say it wasn't a date and if it did, then he may say that it was one.

Our meals came and I found out that through my bumbling anxiousness, I managed to order lasagna which was not that bad considering that I once gotten squid ink pasta at one of my dates and although it tasted good, there was not a single kiss from that night.

I glanced towards Adam then to my food before slightly laughing, "Remember that lasagna you made me?"

"Which I still promised that I would make you one from scratch," he grinned, cutting his steak, "Visit my apartment soon, it gets a little lonely."

My posture relaxed because there wasn't a tinge of flirtation in his teasing tone and it sounded more like friendly banter than anything. What I've learned from the past is that overthinking a situation never ends well and maybe the best thing to do is just to take a deep breath and enjoy yourself.

So that was what we did – instead of him trying to be a good date or such that might make him look like a jerk or instead of me being a nervous wreck, we relaxed and just imagined ourselves like we were in his empty apartment again, using his moving boxes as our only furniture.

Because that was us. My thing with Justin included loud pizza places with old arcade machines and his thing with Heart was running away from the paparazzi while making a game out of it.

And our thing? It was undefined because we weren't dating yet and I don't know if he likes me while I'm still balancing the pros and cons of developing feelings for him.

But the process has started – it began when he brought me up to that roof deck where he showed me the twilight sky. He held my hand and didn't let go, seemingly prepared that the both of us were moving on from people we held the torch for.

He took the wine bottle and refilled our glasses, raising it once again and this time, actually completing his toast, "Here's to us."

I blinked at him for a second before the corners of my lips twitched up into a smile, "To us."

And we were lost in our own little world during that night. No tension, not forced or hidden flirting, but simply two people enjoying each other's company.

"So what do you think?" he dared to ask after we had ended our meals, he paid the bill, and got our coats back, "Good, bad, anything?"

"And if I say it was horrible?" I crossed my arms over my chest in a challenging fashion.

He smiled down and shrugged, "Then I'll still consider this as a date."

I paused halfway out of the door because of his words but he remained calm, offering me an arm. I had to stop my mouth from gaping before my gaze went upwards. He wasn't looking at me and I know for a fact that his emotions were unidentifiable as mine were.

Okay, this was going to be a slow burn.

Linking my arm with his, he escorted me out hailed out a cab to take us back to the university. But while we were on the ride, I turned to him and swallowed hard before I spoke, "Just saying, I had a really great time tonight."

"I'm glad," he smiled, the streetlights that we passed by slightly illuminating his face.

No, there was no kiss when he walked me back to the dormitories. Actually, it was more awkward than I predicted but we resorted to a simple wave of goodbye instead of a compromising hug or an uncomfortable handshake. Julia wasn't back from her date yet so I had to ask Meg to help me get out of the dress before bolting into the bathroom.

"In the most non-stalker like fashion, I watched you part outside," she said when I was back in my room, "So it wasn't a date."

"It was," I stated, grabbing an oversized shirt and a pair of cotton shorts, shrugging off the bathrobe I hastily put on, "Okay, theoretically that I might like him but at the same time, I don't want to like him right now but I'm open to the idea of liking him, yet I have no idea when I think I'm ready to like him, so what do you think I should do?"

"All I heard was like, like, liking, and like," she placed her hands on her hips, "You're talking just like me when I'm out shopping."

"Okay, all-knowing Megan," I shot sarcastically while I pulled on the shorts and inserting myself into the shirt, "What advice do you have for me."

"Get some paper and write exactly what you just told me, even just the first part," she instructed, sitting on my bed as I reached under my pillow and took out my sketchbook since it was the nearest thing I could grab. With the pen sitting on my bedside table, I did what I was told on one of the blank pages, the ink slightly bleeding into the paper.

I might like him but at the same time, I don't want to like him right now.

I passed it to her and she used the pen to cross out multiple words in the sentence then tossing it onto my lap, pressing it down with her pointer finger, "Now read it."

"I like him," I said without a second thought and then when it registered in my brain, I gasped while my jaw slightly slackened at her deceit, "Hey!"

She smirked, standing up and shooting me a wink, "I'm no psychologist but I recommend repeating that until you come in terms with yourself."

She skipped out of the room, leaving the door ajar and I groaned, looking down on the paper. My hands traced over the words as my eyebrows scrunched up with confusion, "Do I?"

I like him. I like him. I like him. I like him.

I fell backwards onto the mattress as I closed my eyes shut. I tried to picture us together, my hand clasped in his like last Tuesday, him pulling me with him like that twilight, his laughter echoing in my mind, his playful smiles and remarks, his teasing jabs and optimistic outlook, his caring gaze and pleasant sighs – all of them slowly disappeared until it was just an image of his back. The one I saw when he dragged me to the rooftop, the warmth that had engulfed me then and how I compared it to when he embraced me.

"I like him," it was a quiet whisper and yet, it felt like I just screamed it to the universe.

Oh gosh I like him.

I jolted back up and scrambled around to reach for the book that was just sitting on my bedside table. I flipped it open to the chapter I knew by heart – not because it was the most dramatic scene, but it was the beginning to a story I would never forget.

She was slowly turning into a green-eyed monster because as much as she wanted to deny it, those glares that she showed to whoever girl approached him was extremely noticeable to everybody else. She refused to acknowledge it because admitting it was like telling herself that she liked him.

Whenever he would approach her after talking to another girl in their class, she would huff and roll her eyes at him. She would ignore him, not because she was mad at him, but because she wanted him to give her the time of day. She wanted his attention and for her, the only way that could happen was being a bit of a dive.

It didn't backfire, because instead of walking away and waiting for her to cool down, he went down on his knees – much to the amusement of their friends – and begged for forgiveness for a fault he did not know of.

Yes, she forgave him. Aside from that, another happening occurred when she realized that the stabbing feeling in her chest was in fact jealousy.

She liked him.

If I learned about what I felt from him was caused by jealousy, this one bloomed by halting the denial. The acceptance of the 'what if' and honestly, I like this way better.

But now there's the question if he will ever feel the same about me and whether or not he does, will I ever tell him?

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You might not feel it now, but you guys will love Julia and Meg soon. Not right now, but eventually.

Old A/N: Admittedly, I almost forgot to update but that was because it was my first week of internship and let me tell you, the stress plus the rain caused my immune system to go down and now I'm here nursing what possibly could be the flu. 

Have I left Radish? Kind of yes. There were just some things I don't agree with the team in terms of professionalism and morals so I do not update there anymore. BUT all chapters that were uploaded there will remain there. Unless they change their ways, I would stay here for now.

New A/N: I'm a sentimental girl so I don't have it in me to delete my old author's notes. On the flip side, I still kept up with my promise that I have at least one update a week. You guys just had two

Don't forget to vote, comment, and follow. I love you guys and I shall see you all next chapter.