I sank a little lower into my bathtub, letting the hot water sooth my body aches. After Jackson left, I was feeling nauseous again and decided to have some chicken noodle soup and saltine crackers. The added benefit of the ginger ale definitely help. After I enjoyed my meal, I decided to take a bath. I was currently flipping through one of the books he got me. What to Expect When You're Expecting.

The beginning of the book told me a few things I already knew, but then it also told me a lot of things I didn't know. It was very enlightening and I was grateful to Jackson for getting it for me. Not long after he left, Harper called me to give me a play-by-play of how it went with her mother. According to her, her mother was starting to actually make some progress in bettering herself.

Harper said that her mom apologized for what she had done and actually showed remorse. She said she wanted to make an effort to be in her life and get to know Jackson. I asked Harper if she believed her mother, and she said yes. I was happy for them. It sounded like they were actually making some progress.

Harper was also surprised and amused when I told her that Jackson had paid me a visit and dragged me out of the house. She was also extremely surprised when I told her he now knew that I was pregnant. I also confessed that he offered for me to come stay with them so I wasn't by myself, and she thought it was a good idea.

When I told her I wanted to think about it, she told me stop thinking that I would be imposing on them. Harper explained that they had plenty of room and it would help to keep her from worrying about me by myself. I swear, my best friend knew me better than I did sometimes.

The sound of my phone ringing had me quickly drying my hands before I grabbed it. When the caller ID said UNKNOWN, I nearly squealed with happiness. It was either Ayden or Nate. I would be happy hearing from either one of them.

"Hello?"

"Hey, baby."

Tears of joy streamed down my face when I heard Ayden's voice come through the line. "Hey," I said on a sob.

"How are you feeling?" He asked in a low tone. "How's the baby?"

I smiled as I ran my hand over my belly. I wasn't showing yet, but I was excited to see what my baby bump would look like. "I'm good. We're both good." Next was the question I was dreading. "Are you and Nate safe?"

The silence before his answer told me what I needed to know. "We're okay. How was your day?"

I knew he was lying, but I couldn't think about that. Instead, I giggled as I shifted in the tub. "Well, Jackson came by to check on me and ended up hanging out for a few hours. He brought me some food and ended up taking me shopping. Get this," I quipped, "I thought Harper spilled the beans about me being pregnant and I ended up outing myself."

Ayden's laugh on the other end of the line made my entire night. "Well, I'm sure it was just a matter of time before he found out anyway. What did he take you shopping for?"

"He took me shopping for pregnancy stuff. It was so random. I guess he wanted to drag me out of the house since I've stayed in bed the past few days." As soon as the words left my lips, I regretted it.

"Why have you been in bed? Have you not gone to work? I thought you said you and the baby were okay."

His concern was one of the many reasons I loved him. "We are okay, Ayden. It's just normal pregnancy stuff. I was having really bad morning sickness so I decided to stay home and rest for a few days. My boss was nice enough to approve it." When he remained silent, I added, "Ayden, I promise you we are okay."

He let out what sounded like a relieved sigh. "Okay, good." He cleared his throat. "What stuff did you get when you went shopping?"

"He got me a body pillow, some pregnancy books, and a journal." I frowned when the other end of the line was completely silent. "Ayden?"

"I'm here." The roughness in his voice made my chest ache. "God, Lanie. I should be there with you. I should be the one going shopping with you."

It took every ounce of energy I had to not let my emotions get the best of me. If I got upset, it would only make him more upset. That was the last thing I wanted for either of us.

"Ayden, don't do that. You going to be here let's enjoy this time that we have to talk, okay? How about we change the subject to something more...playful?"

He cleared his throat before he asked, "So, what are you wearing?"

I couldn't hold back my smile when Ayden asked me that question. Even though I was in the privacy of my own home, I still felt my cheeks heat up. "Why, Sergeant, I do believe it was your idea to keep that line of questioning to letters and emails only from now on."

He snorted on the other end of the line. "Maybe. Maybe I want to take advantage of actually having some privacy tonight."

"You're alone?" I asked hopefully. Even though we usually spoke on the phone once or twice a week, he was always around other soldiers. There have been a few times in the beginning when he was alone, but we were just friends then. Friends having a normal conversation.

Now? Now we were so much more. Even though he was thousands of miles away, something happened between us. Something that keeps me up at night worrying about him. Something that has me keeping secrets from my brother still. First I was only keeping our relationship a secret. Now, I was keeping my brothers own niece or nephew a secret.

Everytime I spoke to Nate, I felt more and more guilty. We promised each other a long time ago that we wouldn't get involved with each other's closest friends. That was the reason he never even attempted to go after Harper, Danielle, or Jaime. But here I was, a total hypocrite. It may not have been intentional, but it happened. Sooner or later, I needed to tell him.

"Yeah, the rest of my unit is doing a training session," Ayden said into the phone.

"And you don't have to be a part of it?" I asked before glancing at the calendar on my phone. It's been exactly two months since he left the first time, and each passing day is getting harder and harder.

"Nope. I got the night off. Well, you know what I mean," he laughed.

I knew exactly what he meant. Even though he was "off" for the night, it didn't mean he may not have to fight tonight or go off on some secret mission. I wish I knew more about what his job entailed. Since he was Special Forces, he couldn't tell me much. When Nate became a part of Special Forces, he started being tight-lipped about it, too. I wish these two would just be honest with me. The truth was better than letting my mind wander.

"Lucky me," I replied with a heavy sigh. "By the way," I added, "You left your hoodie here."

"I know. It was intentional."

I smiled again. "Really?"

"Yeah. I figured you would wear it, you know, when you were missing me."

How right he was about that. I ended up wearing that hoodie almost all day everyday while he was gone. It still smelled like the cologne he wore and it made me feel a little better when I was down.

"Tell me what's on your mind," he said softly when I remained silent. I had no idea how he always knew when something was bothering me. I was supposed to be the psychic one.

"How do you know something is wrong?" I quipped.

"I can tell. I can feel it in the force all the way over here." His deep voice sent chills through my body. It was amazing how much he affected me. Lately, he was all I thought about. All I dreamed about.

"I don't know. I miss you. It's just-"

"Hard," he finished for me. "I know. It's hard for me too, Goddess."

I smiled at the nickname. "You know, I love that nickname. No one has called me by a nickname besides Nate in over a decade."

"Nate doesn't count." I could hear the smile in his voice. "Besides, I like that I'm the only one who calls you that."

"Me too," I breathed. Truth was, I liked it a little too much.

"So, I'm going to ask one more time, Goddess. What are you wearing?"

I was still in the bath right now and I couldn't wait to hear his reaction when I told him. Just as I opened my mouth to answer, the other end of the line erupted in gunfire.

Moments later, there was no sound coming from the other line. There was only dead silence.