Chapter 34 - Rachel Stark 

I peel my eyes from the screen, watching as all of the S.H.I.E.L.D. safeguards fall away. A wry smile graces my lips as I take my gun off of Pierce's temple and turn back to the computer. All of the data is leaking onto the internet. Everything. My small victory is short-lived as I listen to Sam get shot down over the comms. I don't avert my eyes from the screen, however, trying to keep my face a stoic mask. 

"Done. And it's trending." I meet Pierce's gaze with a smirk, which he returns, causing me to raise my eyebrows in confusion. A scream breaks out over the room, turning my attention away from Alexander's face. I turn my head towards the noise, seeing one of the councilmen screaming and holding his chest. Sparks fly from the pins that were given to us, burning into the chests of the other members as well. I pick up my gun from the computer counter, taking a few short steps forward towards Pierce. I hear another gun getting pulled, throwing a look past Alexander to see Fury aiming at his head as well. Pierce quickly holds up his device, his thumb hovering over the screen. 

"Unless you want a two-inch hole in your sternum, I'd put that gun down." I keep my face unflinching, thinking through my options. "That was armed the moment you pinned it on." 

I slowly put my gun down, bringing it to my side. Alexander grabs it roughly from my hand and aims it at my head as he makes his way over to the computer. The three of us still standing watch each other in silence, each of us waiting for the other to make the first move. A gunshot rings out and I flinch, garnering the attention of both Fury and Pierce. 

"Sam?" I ask, checking over the comms. The chaos that unfolded in the room caused me to tune out the noise that was flooding through the comm. Now, with the painful silence, I heard it all. 

"Not me," he grunts, obviously hearing the shot as well. I whip my attention to the windows.

"Cap?" I ask frantically. Something runs through Pierce's eyes that cause my stomach to flip in panic. 

"Rachel," he grunts, his voice already thick with fatigue. My heart falters as my brain tries to decipher whether or not the bullet hit Steve. 

"30 seconds Cap!" Maria yells through the comm. I hear Steve's heavy breath. That shot had to have hit him. My mind starts racing, trying to run through all of the ways that I could get out of this room and to Steve.

"Charlie-" he is cut off by a gunshot. I gasp quietly, my hands beginning to subtly shake at my sides. Fury looks quizzically at me, trying to keep an eye on Pierce at the same time. My heartbeat begins to pick up its pace, ringing out in my ears. I try to control my breathing, attempting every possible technique I know.

I look back to the big screen in the room, watching the number increase by thousands. If Steve doesn't get this chip in place...

"Charlie lock." My thoughts are cut off by his voice, filled with pain. I feel the beginnings of a crack forming in my heart as I clutch my chest.

"Okay Cap, get outta there," Maria says.

"Fire now."

"Steve!" I whimper, clutching my chest tighter as I look back to the scene outside. This isn't it... it can't be. 

"Do it! Do it now!" Steve yells, his words laced with pain. I shake my head in silent response.

"No!" I try, but watch as the guns begin to fire on the last remaining carrier. The tears brim in my eyes and the wind is taken from my lungs as my knees buckle under me. Fury tries to step forward but doesn't make it in time as I sink to the floor. Pierce aims his gun away from me and over to Fury, getting him to back off. Tears fall from my eyes silently as my breathing runs ragged.  

"You still on the fence about Rogers' chances?" Fury mumbles to Pierce. Alexander aims the gun at me again as he makes his way across the room to me. He grabs my bad arm and I whimper as he pulls me up from the floor.

"Time to go, Councilwoman. You are going to fly me out of here." I put my hand into my pocket, feeling my way around it since my eyes are unable to see anything without the blur of tears. I try taking deep breaths again, a plan forming in my head. The faster I get out of this room, the faster I'll be able to locate Steve. 

"You know, there was a time that I would've taken a bullet for you," Fury says to Pierce, causing him to stop in his tracks. He lets go of my arm as I find one of the little widow's bites that Fury had suggested I bring earlier. I quickly take it between my thumb and pointer finger, the cold metal momentarily pulling my attention away from Steve. 

"You already did. You will again when it's..." I cut him as my body goes stiff and hits the floor. The shock stings, but it'll do the job; that pin will be disabled by the time the pain subsides. I writhe around on the ground as a shot rings out around the room. I mentally flinch, thinking I'd been shot, but when the bite's edge wears off, I relax. The shot was not meant for me. I hear footsteps approach my side and the squeak of leather.  

"Stark. Rachel. Rachel! Come on!"

"Ow," I grumble, opening my eyes only to see Fury. "Those really do sting." He chuckles and helps me stand up, grabbing my good arm. I sigh as we stand, the pain running down my body again.

"We have to go find Steve," he urges as he leads me to the chopper. I carefully get in the back, my pantsuit swishing against the seat. Fury gets it up in the air and we hover for a moment, trying to determine where to go first. I look around frantically, trying to find anything that could tell me where Steve was. 

"Please tell me you got that chopper in the air!" Sam yells into the comms, taking my attention away from the search. 

"Sam, where are you?" I ask as I wipe the tear stains from my cheeks.

"41st floor! Northwest corner!" he says. Fury turns the bird around, headed towards the location.

"We're on it! Stay where you are!" I yell back, looking out the side of the chopper again.

"Not an option!" We quickly swing around the helicarrier and get in position to catch Sam, hopefully somewhere around the 40th floor. I watch in awe as Sam leaps from the building, about 3 floors above where we were at. I ready myself as Sam falls. I grab his arm as he grabs one of the seats, trying to break his fall. The door does most of the work, however, flying off after his impact. 

"41st floor! 41st!"  Sam yells to Fury and I as he gains his bearings back. He looks at me in shock as he pulls himself into the seat next to me. 

"It's not like they put the numbers on the outside of the building!" Fury yells from the front, pulling the helicopter out of the way of the falling building.

"Hill! Where is Steve?" I say, tears quickly returning to my eyes. I feel a hand on my shoulder and look behind me to see Sam watching me intently. 

"No, Rachel, I'm sorry." My breath hitches as the information sets in. I let my tears fall, unabashedly and fully. Fury continues on around the falling debris, still looking. My breathing becomes irregular and I feel Sam's hand tighten on my shoulder in worry. He says something that I can't hear as Fury lands the helicopter on the land around the Potomac. 

I shake off Sam's hand as I get out of my seat, my heels sinking in the mud around the river. I am flanked by Sam and Fury as we search the bank. We search for minutes, slowly losing time and hope of finding him. I come to a sharp stop when I see the Soldier pulling Steve out of the water by one of the straps on his uniform. I feel my heart begin to race faster, watching the man pull my friend out of the river. 

Not just some man, but Bucky. His friend. 

I quickly come to the realization that Bucky must still be in there. He gently drops Steve's injured body on the ground and meets my eyes as he looks up. I rush over to him, causing him to flinch away. I stop a good few feet back, not wanting to start a fight or scare him off. 

"Thank you," I rasp through uneven breaths. I watch him nod, the vacancy flooding back into his eyes as he turns his back on us and walks away. Once he puts some distance between himself and our group, I rush over to Steve. I am not sure that I am breathing as I drop to my knees, assessing his injuries. I reach out a shaking hand and gingerly brush my fingers over the massive bruises that have already formed near his lovely eyes. 

My heart jumps as I hear him cough, water dribbling from his lips. I quickly throw my hands over the bullet wound on his torso, applying as much pressure as I can as a quick breath rushes into my lungs. 

I'm panicking. 

I let out a small sob as he continues coughing, trying my best to keep him comfortable through all of the pain. My heart seizes up thinking about how much pain he is in. Sam comes up behind me and grabs the sides of Steve's head, helping to stabilize his neck and spine. Sam cracks a panicked smile as Steve opens his eyes ever so slightly. 

"Steve! Steve! Stay with me, okay?" I say as steadily as I can through sobs. I lean my face over his, hoping he would be able to see me through the slits of his open eyes. He coughs again and I cringe, applying more pressure to his wound.

"Rachel," he says in a whisper. My hands start to shake as I fixate on the blood covering my hands. Steve's blood. "Rachel," he tries to get my attention away from his torso.

"Stay with me, okay? I need you to stay." I look up at his face through my tears, throwing a quick glance towards Fury who is already on the phone. Sam's eyes are on me. I feel the attention burning on my skin.

"I..." he cuts himself off, trying to gather enough breath in his lungs. "I love... you," he breathes, closing his eyes once more. An ugly sob tears out of me as I try to hold pressure on his wounds with my shaking hands and body. My eyes go wide as I look at his face again.

"I... I love you too. Stay with me! I love you too..." I trail off, feeling his body go still. I lose it as I lay my brow on his chest. I sob, my entire body convulsing, unable to control the tremor my hands were feeling earlier. 

I feel like I am going to throw up. It feels so... so... shattering. My hands move from his torso to his shoulders, my eyes searching his face for any sign of life. I slowly lean towards his head, placing a kiss on his temple as my entire body continues to shake.

As I pull away, a strong pair of hands go under my shoulders and pick me up, pulling me away from Steve. I am about to turn around and fight them off through the tears until I hear his voice. 

"Let them work on him." Sam pulls me into his arms, pinning mine to my sides with my back against his chest so that I can watch the EMTs work. He tells me to breathe, trying to align our breathing so that I can calm down. It doesn't work as my tears stream down my face. 

I watched numbly as the team of EMTs cart him off on a gurney. I turn around, facing Sam, and pull him into a hug. 

I meant it too. I meant those three little words. 

I knew I wanted to say them to him for a long time now, almost since the day that he kissed me in that hospital. But I was scared. I still am scared because of stuff like this. Steve just fell from the sky and all I could do was watch. But I can't let this stop me anymore. 

We are Avengers. 

There will never be a good moment or a time where everything feels normal. I have been over this conversation with myself too many times to count. I needed to get it off my chest, but now, I may not ever be able to talk to him again. I missed it all. We so colossally missed each other. Every time one of us was ready, the other wasn't. And now? Now, we may never get a chance to say those three little words to each other again.