| NAINA |

Looking into people's eyes was always a kind of addiction for me. While their voice tells us the stories they want us to hear, their eyes tell us the stories they refuse to say. I always believed that stories that later make us regret knowing it lie beneath the eyes. But I couldn't help but have my heart broken because of this.

Though Angad's voice gave a romantic vibe, his eyes gave the melancholy. His eyes were heavy with guilt and confusion, not love and passion.

Hence, I decided to clear my doubts.

"Angad, before saying my response, I feel like you wanted to tell me something more than this. Do you mind telling me what's that?"

His face had an inexplicable horror as I saw it go white as snow. Yet, trying to conceal it with his smile, he said, "Yeah. I was about to tell you that. Shall I proceed?"

"Sure." There I was, embracing an iceberg-sized twist with a warm smile.

"Naina, some truths are sweet to hear. Some are hard to digest. Some are hard to hear. But this is the hardest to reveal.

"The thing is, you still don't know much about me. My first meeting with you was not on the flight from New York. I hid a long tale that happened before that. I remember seeing you often at Central Park two years ago. And that was the moment I realised that you are my other crazy half. It was my fault for not meeting you back then and confessing my feelings because you had a life with another guy. That was when I met this girl. She is my fiancee, Meeta Grover. Oh, and yeah, I came to India to get married, and you came to India to see me getting married. But the thing is that I don't like Meeta. I couldn't imagine living a life with her by my side. It's you and only you."

Heavy emotions from his eyes were transferred to mine as he was done. I knew that it would be worse, but that was the worst of the worst.

He is my friend's fiance. And my friend loves him more than anything else. But he loves his fiancee's friend.

Could this go any worse than this?

Tears trickled down as I analysed what had happened now. I wanted to push him out of a cliff and cry hard. But I have a life. So does he.

Ignoring the thought with a cough, I finally found my voice. "Does she know this?"

"Meeta? No. I don't dare to say it."

Okay, I saw this coming.

I looked away from him, and my eyes that held perplexion were on the dark sky. A few minutes ago, he was commencing his proposal with a cheesy pickup line with the stars in the sky and my eyes.

Then I looked at his eyes with a heavy heart and said, "Drop me at my house."

***

"Is that a no?"

He killed the silence between us for the past four hours as I was about to turn away from him to go inside my house.

"What do you mean?" I tried to be headstrong by looking at him with my head tilted to my left.

"I said that you can put forward your rejection by asking me to drop at your house. So--"

"Listen, Angad." I interrupted him to end that conversation as soon as possible. I might fall back on him if I spend another minute with him. "I'm not as impromptu as you are. You may know me as your crush for the last two years. But you are still a stranger to me. Remember that we met only a couple of weeks ago. And I already faced a set of heartbreaks in these two weeks. Not again. So, please give me some time. I beg you!"

There was a silence that demanded us to end the conversation. And I followed it.

"Good night, Angad."

***

Charlotte: What happened, Nee?

Me: Angad proposed to me today.

Charlotte: Proposal as in? Wedding proposal? Or love proposal?

Me: Wedding.

Charlotte: OH MY--

Charlotte: How come so soon?

Me: It seems he was in love with me for two years.

Charlotte: Oh! Secret admirer, huh?

Me: Yeah, but...

Me: It turns out to be that he is Meeta's fiancé.

Charlotte: Wait! Meeta, as in your bride friend?

Me: I wish that's a no.

Charlotte: Fuck!

Charlotte: I don't know what to say now.

Charlotte: What did you say?

Me: What should I say? "Ditch Meeta and marry me."? Or "Go fuck yourself."?

Me: I asked him to give me some time. I need time.

Charlotte: What's there to think? If you say yes, then there's no better way than this to cheat your friend.

Me: Yeah. But all I think about is Angad. He seems much more serious about pursuing me. No fool would wait for a girl for two whole years.

Charlotte: Veer waited for Zaara for twenty-two years. What say?

Me: How did you know about Veer-Zaara, Charlie?

Charlotte: FYI: I have dated Indians as well.

Charlotte: Anyways, what's your call?

Me: To be honest, I have no reason to say no except for the fact that he is my friend's fiance.

Charlotte: Is there any better reason than this to say no? What else do you want? That he is a womaniser? That he is a drug lord? Think straight, Nee.

Me: Don't worry, Charlie.

Me: I have a plan.

But neither do I know what the plan is.

***

THE NEXT DAY...

I was watching Dangal, a biography of Mahavir Singh Phogat and his wrestler daughters Geeta Phogat and Babita Kumari and mopping my house when I received a call from Charlotte.

"What happened, Charlie?" I raised my eyebrows at the eerie silence over the call as I connected it. All I heard was her gasping loudly. "Charlie, I asked what had happened. Are you having sex or what?" I couldn't help but yell at her for being silent like a stupid.

"Nee..." There she was, going all silent again.

"Look, Charlie. I'm already pissed off! Please tell me what the fuck is going--"

"Mom called," she had finally spoken abruptly after seconds of silence.

"Whose mom? Mine?" I asked, unpacking everything from my sling bag.

"Yeah. Dad..." She gasped for more and proceeded, "Dad had a cardiac arrest this morning and..."

"And?" My voice cracked as my mind had already speculated what was going on.

"Mom said that Dad passed away this morning, and..." With that, I heard nothing while my body threatened to fall.

***

THE NEXT DAY...

"Mumma!" I hugged the sulking lady in a white kurta, sitting near her dead husband.

"Naina!" Mumma couldn't help but wail so loud that the skies of New York City would crash down. "Look at him, Naina." She pointed at Papa, who went into an evermore sleep. "He left us all alone. I want to go with him. Why did he leave me alone?"

"Mumma, don't say such things. Please! I'm sorry, Mumma. I should have been with him during his last days. I'm extremely sorry, Mumma. Please forgive me." I almost made her top damp with my tears and mucus.

"Chechi!" We heard Mumma's sister Rohini exclaiming in an exuberant tone and a happy face that fell off after seeing our devastating state.

***

After an hour, half of New York's Vogue office and our neighbours were assembled in our house. Since Mumma and Papa were separated from their families, Rohini Mausi, her daughter Dhriti, and Dada's cousin Kishore were the only participants as our family members. Charlie and her girlfriend Olivia were the first participants and helped us with everything.

Mumma couldn't have any food and always sat near Papa. She either spoke to herself (or to Papa), cried continuously, or lied next to him. Kishore Chacha and Dhriti tried a lot to calm Mumma down, but it went in vain. How could she calm down? It was not some random stuff she lost but the man of her life.

I did nothing except sit on the chair at the entrance and welcome everyone. I could barely speak because of the emotional lump in my throat. Hence, I decided to go mum.

Until I saw Angad standing at the entrance with his trolley and rucksack.

Charlie was the first to notice when I was sleeping with my head leaning on the wall. As I woke up, I saw him approaching me and asking, "Are you okay, Naina?"

Overtook by a wave of emotions, I nodded a yes and did nothing else. And he placed his bags next to me and went towards Mumma while I followed him. What if he introduced himself as my boyfriend?

"Hi, Aunty." He sat near Mumma, who was lying on the floor until then.

Sitting upright, she looked at him first. Then she looked at me. Then him. Then me. And finally, her gaze locked on me as if to ask who was that guy in the white shirt and blue jeans.

Sitting near her, yet away from him, I said, "He's my friend, Angad. We met in Delhi." He looked at me while I glared as if to say, "Don't tell her about us."

"Oh! Hi, beta!" Mumma finally spoke up after minutes of silence while we looked at her again.

"What happened, Aunty?" Angad asked in a concerned tone while I went to my position.

"How did he know?" Charlie raised her eyebrows and looked at him. "Did you tell him?"

"No." I shook my head and looked at the ceiling. Then it struck me. "Meeta?"

"Exactly!" She sat upright and snapped her fingers. "I told her this morning." Then, we looked at how Angad comforted Mumma with a hug. "Just look how he is: a typical son-in-law type."

I clicked my tongue and said, "All must be a drama," while my heart said otherwise.

***

My mind replayed the last time I faced Papa before sending off his delicate body to the electric crematorium. I remember Mumma standing to my right and Angad to my left. I was leaning on Angad (I didn't notice it back then) while Kishore Chacha was taking care of the formalities. I broke into tears as it went on. So did Mumma. I remember Angad patting Mumma's head while I was busy looking at the burning man who was the cause of my birth.

As the gentle night breeze of New York City was on my face, I felt a hand on my shoulder. And I instantly knew who that was.

"What are you doing here?" I whisper-yelled at my friend's fiance, standing in the backyard under the glistening stars and aesthetic sky.

"Meeta told me everything. She regretted how she couldn't be with you in the saddest part of your life. So, she wanted to talk to you," he said, took out his mobile and dialled Meeta. After a few seconds, he spoke up. "Hello? Meeta, Naina is here." He passed his mobile to me while tears waited for her voice to be heard.

"Naina?" Her cracky voice made tears crack down my eyes; my voice trembled as fuck.

"Meeta?" I closed my mouth with my palm, but the sound kept escaping.

"I'm sorry, Naina. It's not that I didn't want to meet you. Dadi didn't allow me, Naina. She said the bride isn't allowed to inauspicious events when the wedding is near. I'm so sorry. I want to be with you. Please forgive me." She unapologetically bellowed while my conscience shook hard.

"That's... That's okay, Meeta. It happens. Okay? Don't cry. Please!" My voice stopped trembling as I picked up a pace while she didn't stop crying.

"No matter what, you should stay strong. You are the only belonging Mumma has in the world. Nobody can calm her down like you do. Mumma will be strong only if you do. Only you can help her to move on. I know it's hard for you to move on as well. But, you two are the company of each other. Stay strong! I love you. Talk to me when you feel like doing it." That was her turn not to cry and try to console me.

"I love you, Meeta." I was full of guilt as my eyes fell on the guy in front of me, whose face was kissed by the moonlight.

"I love you more, Naina," she said while I heard a peck.

"Take care. And focus on your wedding. I'll be there soon. Bye!"

"Don't force yourself. Bye!" She disconnected the call while I handed over the mobile to Angad.

"Thank you," I whispered and moved away to lean on the compound wall, facing the Smiths' house. And that brought sweet memories of how I played ball games with Mr. Smith, his teen son John, and Papa after my college hours. Papa was a great player in our team, yet he used to pretend he was the worst, for my sake. Hence, I would have a chance to play.

Tears blocked my view; I became breathless as more memories flashed on. I closed my mouth so that the sound doesn't escape. I wanted to yell, "Papa, I miss you!" but no, a part of me suppressed it.

"Naina," Angad called me from behind, and as I looked back, he had a paper stuck to a Snickers while I felt like having a deja vu.

I had it from him and read the message written on it.

Shit happens. I know that. But Papa loves your face glowing while you smile. :) -- Angad, your lone companion.

My eyes were on the lovesick guy in front of him. Then it struck me. He had known me since I lost my grandmother to surgery. He was at the same hospital where she was admitted. And he was in love with me since I decided to take charge of Grandma. And he stood with me while I didn't care a fuck about who he was.

I took a few steps closer to him. We were half an inch away while I cupped his face. My gaze fell on him, who looked unusually handsome tonight. Those eyebrows that were frowning at me relaxed as my head was on his shoulder. It was so warm as drinking hot chocolate during winter. It was so refreshing, like to have a hot shower after a long day. It was so like a home to me.

But I must acknowledge that he is my friend's fiancee.

While that thought sprung into my head, I moved an inch away from him, and we parted. I whispered, "Sorry," and ran to my room.

Leaning on the door, I whispered loudly, "God! Why the fuck is my heart beating so fast? Come on, Naina! Relax. You are not falling in love. Don't act like one."

***

I guess, I did my best today. Please tell me how it was. I won't mind even if you find it to be awful.

Stay tuned for more!

Song Courtesy: Style by Taylor Swift.

By the way, Happy Wattversary to me!