The song above is how Skye feels about Miles.

•••

Skye

I had a tendency to ignore or forgive people for their mistakes and flaws. Especially, when it came to friends and lovers.

Ashely and Skye; my two best friends. While me and Ash had always been close, that's not the case with Skye. To me she deserved the world, and no one would ever be good enough for her, especially not someone like Miles. But that's not the way she saw it. She saw a guy with charming eyes and witty words, while I saw a boy who made rash choices and cruel remarks.

I bent down until I was sitting on the carpeted floor. The lavender bean bag to the left of me matched the four purple walls of Skye's room. There was a desk that held a lamp and laptop that occupied a corner of the petite room. There wasn't a lot of space left for anything else besides the queen size bed. Skye had four other siblings who happened to all be older than her, so until one of them moved out she was stuck with the smallest room.

Even though the space was small we often had sleepovers and study sessions here. At my house there was to great a chance at hearing a marriage fall apart, and at Ashley's house her parents were to "in her business", as Ash liked to complain. They were constantly suffocating her with questions and adoration. Ashley hated it and hardly ever invited anyone to her home, but I thought they were sweet. They cared. How could anyone despise that?

Two figures sat facing each other on the bed, in between them a plate of homemade cookies. They were eating in what seemed to be a comfortable silence.

"These are.." Ashley chewed away at the cookie, a crunching sound drifted into the air.

"In my defense," Skye picked up a cookie and tapped it against the plate. She cringed when it bounced back, completely intact. "I've never made cookies before."

Scooting the plate away from them Ashley crinkled her nose. "Oh, I know. I was only trying them so I didn't hurt your feelings."

This caused a bubble of laughter to escape from Skye's lips. Almost as sudden as it came, it was gone, a frown left in its place.

My own frown deepened. She should be laughing and smiling. She should be moving on.

"God, I hate this. Don't you hate this?" She didn't wait for her reply. "I hate that I feel guilt for laughing over something so small. And when I smile I want to slap myself for being so insensitive. It feels like I haven't smiled in eons." Skye threw her body back onto the bed with a sigh.

She had no reason to feel guilty. I was the one who had meddled in her love life and caused a whole slew of problems. I'd almost ruined our friendship, and over a meaningless boy.

Skye continued with her rant. "You know the other day I was actually happy, guaranteed it was only for a split second, but still. Over the smallest thing ever too. Mom called me down for dinner and when I went down I smelled the lasagna she had made. I became so happy, over lasagna!" She shook her head in confusion. "And then every time I feel guilty I instantly get mad too. I feel mad at myself for not being a better friend and at the universe for not giving her a better life. But most of all I feel angry at her. Angry at the choices she made."

Ashley stared at her in silence, words weren't enough. She knew that no matter what she told Skye it wouldn't take away her anger. I didn't mind it much. In fact, I was glad that Skye was mad, because it meant that she was still feeling. It's when you stopped talking about how you felt that things became chaotic. Your thoughts carved every single negative feeling into your soul. I was a semi-living and breathing example.

"I hate feeling this way. It makes me weak." Skye's eyes glazed over at the thought.

Ashley finally spoke, "No Skye. It makes you human."

•••

* Seven Months Earlier *

"This sucks donkey balls." Ashley threw her pencil down from where she was laying on the bed. Skye and I shared a look before bursting into laughter.

"Really, donkey balls?" Skye's laughter grew. Mine joined, causing me to clutch my aching stomach.

"Stoppp. It's not funny." Ashley wined, not appreciating us laughing at her misery.

We'd all gotten together at Skye's house to work on the piles of homework we'd received. English was Ashley's worst subject, and that's what we were currently working on.

Once we'd managed to calm down and finish the paper we all laid sprawled out on our phones. I had a suspicion that Skye was texting Miles back, despite my many warnings. I wanted nothing more than to say something, but I knew it'd come out harsh and I didn't want to start another fight.

Skye saved me from spewing any unfiltered words that would've been driven by pure selfishness. "What do you think makes humans weak?"

I squinted my eyes at the strange and out of the blue question. Nevertheless, I pondered what she'd asked.

"That's a good one! Huh," Ashley directed her attention towards me. "What do you think Lil?" She loved these kind of talks. Her bubbly energy was felt throughout the room.

Uncrossing my legs I replied, "Humanity." They looked at me with eyes begging to explain. "Humanity makes humans weak. The fact that we are indeed human will always be our greatest downfall. Our emotions and beliefs control us. They drive who we are and who we want to be." I stopped and rolled my eyes at them. They weren't getting my drift.

"I am confusion." Ashley stared at me with wide dark eyes. Biting my lip I tried to think of an example. When nothing came to me I gave them the next best thing.

"Watch The Vampire Diaries." I told my best friends, giving up on them ever understanding where I was coming from.

Ashely just shrugged her shoulders, the curiosity draining out of her. Skye on the other hand still seemed to be deep in thought. Why did she ask in the first place? There was always a deeper reason behind her actions.

"Why'd you wanna know?" I asked, voicing my thoughts. Her eyes darted up to mine, glazed over by an unknown emotion. Only then did I notice how tense her body was.

She pushed her brown hair behind her ear. "I've just been thinking." She answered. Her response only caused my suspicion to raise to new heights.

"About Miles?" Ashley wiggled her eyebrows and let out a series of giggles. I squinted my eyes, daring Skye to answer the question.

"Kind of." She glanced my way nervous about how her answer would affect me.

The words spilled out before I had a chance to think them through. "Is that who you've been texting? I don't even know why you'd answer him back. You're being naive.–"

"No." She shook her head furiously at me. "Stop. Not today, okay Lil? Today I'm happy. He's making me happy." In that moment I knew why she asked, and I knew how'd she answer.

"Love." She'd say. "Love makes us weak."

•••

Ashley laid down next to Skye on the bed. The over cooked cookies had been removed and thrown away. They laid there for quite some time, lost in their own thoughts, before any words were spoken.

"Have you gone to see her?"

"No." Was Skye's choked reply.

"You should. It might help with the anger." Ash was always the one to give advice.

"She wouldn't want me there. Plus, I'm still too angry with her. I'm afraid I'll say all the wrong things."

Ashley shifted over on the bed so that she was laying on her side, facing Skye. "Tell me why you're angry then." I prepared for the pieces left of my heart to be hammered away at.

"I'm mad because she made the worst choices. She chose a selfish road to travel down. She didn't think about everyone who would have to continue living. How am I– are we supposed to keep on living if she's not here?" She wiped at her tears in anger. "No, you know what? I hate her. I hate the way she wasn't happy for me and Miles. I hate the fact that she betrayed you. I absolutely hate how she let herself be pushed around. Most of all I hate how she didn't think she was loved, because she wasn't always lovable." I couldn't do anything but let her words wear down on my soul.

"Oh god, but she was my best friend and I loved her. I loved her so so much. Doesn't that suck? When you hate someone that you love."

•••

A/N
I love their friendship, almost as much as I love Ashley. She's my favorite character :))

Anyways, Q&A time!

How do you feel about Lila? Do you hate her? Love her? Relate to her?

Also just to clarify: She's so rude when it comes to Miles because she thinks that Skye could never do any harm, which is false. (something you'll see later) Miles has constantly hurt her [Lila] emotionally and she doesn't ever want that to happen to Skye.

Until next time ❤️