"Until There Was You" - @Eastwards

Summary:

"I promised myself that although I was different, someday, I would be the center of someone's universe. I would matter to someone, but no one would ever matter to me," she said.

When Jude Lockhart found out that his best friend and his girlfriend were hooking up he was utterly destroyed. His envious reputation began to crumble, and his heart was slowly taking the fall from this surprising turn of events. The two people he cared for more than anything betrayed him, and on top of that, exposed him in front of the entire school. Jude didn't think he would ever recover from the scarring blow, but then he does in the form of Waverly Clarke--a familiar, mysterious girl with a knack for being complicated.

Initial Reaction:

In the first chapter, the plot jumps right into the deep end - so to speak - with the break up. As the reader, I start to freak out! What's happening? Who is this? This jump engages the readers and makes them apart of the story with Jude. Jude's behavior is all normal and also his internal conflict trying to figure out through memories. I'm immediately interested and want to learn more about Jude, his ex-girlfriend, and ex-best friend. How will he heal from this? He's grieving the loss of his girlfriend and also his best friend. This can affect his trust with other people now. This is amazing! The characterization, plot's pacing, and descriptions make me smile. I enjoy every moment!

Strengths:

1. Descriptions: May I give you a hug? The reason being, the descriptions are magnificent! The readers get to see what's happening. The showing versus telling is real and this story shows. I can see and interrupt what the character's emotions are. This also gives the readers opportunity to connect to experience with the characters, the connection is key! One specific example is, in chapter two, when Jude looks back at his ex-girlfriend, Beverly's, photos: "Jude had his arms encircled around her waist, his lips in the crook of her neck, and Beverly had been smiling brightly." The fact he's reflecting on what their relationship was and wishes to continue. On the flip side, he's hurting because he also realizes the reality - he no longer has a girlfriend. The love of his life has cheated on him. He's angry with himself, Beverly, and his ex-best friend, Seth. Keep up the good work, man, I love seeing the mannerisms and characters' actions.

P.S. I'm in love with Waverly! The description in chapter three, "She was the girl who dipped her cookies in orange juice." I am in love. This shows me and gives me an idea of what Waverly is like and also how Jude perceives Waverly from a distance. I'm curious to learn and spend time with her. She's sassy and shuts down Beverly's BS.

2. Internal thoughts: The reader knows what is going on in Jude's mind. This gives the reader insight about his motivation behind his actions and behaviors. In a way, the readers know more about Jude than other characters do. This creates a sense of empathy and bound towards Jude. Especially in chapter four, when Jude has to attend detention, the same detention with Beverly, Seth, Waverly, and other students. Beverly walks up to him to confront and apologize, Jude thinks, "She knew what she was doing to him, ... She had to know." This thought I agree with Jude. We're in his point of view for the narrative, I still agree and side with Jude. I believe she knows what she has done and what she's currently doing to him. She wants to go back to the past as well, this time as Seth's girlfriend not with Jude. She wishes things to continue even though things won't be the same. The readers infer this by Jude's internal thoughts, this helps us understand other characters and seeing in his point of view.

3. Memories: Yaaas! Memories! This helps the readers understand what Jude has experienced in the past. He compares the present to the past. This goes along with his grief and anger of the betrayal. We see the emotional depth in his heart and how he values the relationships. Unlike Beverly and Seth, who seem to overweigh their romantic relationship than Jude's. In chapter one, we see Jude's small memory, trying to piece together hints of their hidden romance: "The looks. The touches. The flirty smiles." He notices these details until he realizes the reality of what's happening. He knew, but he didn't know. The sentences are short and brief, he losses his relationships, so quickly and short like those memories. I find this amazing and throughout the entire five chapters, I read. So good!

Recommendation:

There's a few unanswered questions from the first chapter: "How did Jude find out about them? Did Beverly and Seth kiss? Overhead them? How long has Jude and Beverly been dating? How long has Jude and Seth been friends? What does Jude look like?"

I have a feeling when Jude opens up to Waverly, he'll tell how he found out about their betrayal. Which can keep the reader going to find out this answer.

The reason why I'm curious about how long their relationships have been, depending on how big Jude's trust was with Beverly and Seth, the harsher the betrayal can affect Jude's actions and his behavior towards others, mostly strangers. One recommendation is to hint towards this in Jude's memories or recollection so then the readers have a foundation right away. Then as the story progress, we learn details on their relationships.

The last question has been answered in chapter two and four, he has gray eyes because of his nickname and he looks like his mother. I'm curious what other physical traits he has. It's a small detail, I'm curious to see and helps the readers picture him better.

I hope this helps! I throughly enjoy reading "Until There Was You"!

~ Fallon Elizabeth ~