Summary: "until the cold winter passes, and the spring day greets again, until the flowers bloom, stay there a little longer." Or where Namjoon keeps Seokjin's promise, even though Seokjin's hospital-bound.
Inspiration: Spring Day by BTS (JIN ACTUALLY GOT LINES AND NO JOKE ITS MY FAVOURITE PART OF THE SONG IT SOUNDS SO PLEASING TO THE EAR UGHHHHHHH)
Song: Spring Day by BTS
---
With six flowers clutched in my hands, I stare through the glass of his door, waiting for the call of hope. The plastic seat is uncomfortable, causing me to wiggle around to find a spot that wouldn't make me ache. Although, my butt pains are nothing in comparison as to what he's going through.

Even just saying his name brings tears to my eyes, my poor Seokjin. He's just been laying there in the hospital bed, sleeping and eating repeatedly. I miss the nights where we would eat ramen while binge watching a random series on Netflix, his head nuzzling into my neck for warmth as I wrap my arm around his broad shoulders. I miss the days where we would walk down the beach, having ice cream moustaches as our feet get submerged by the orange sand beneath us, and he would hug onto a rilakkuma toy I won for him at one of the arcades. I miss the afternoons we'd spend at the coffee shop, exploring a book together as we drank different fancy teas. Unfortunately, that had to stop six months ago, when Seokjin started living at the hospital.

Seokjin was diagnosed with cancer of the heart last December, after he complained his chest was hurting several times and passed out soon after. He was rushed to hospital for check-ups, but that's when they found the primary heart tumour. The doctors told me while Seokjin was finishing up in the MRI scan room, and I could feel the world fall around me. I assumed they told Seokjin after I left, because he didn't come home, he didn't call me, he didn't answer my calls. I smashed things that night, broken glass scattered across the floor, clothes flooding the ground, chairs flipped and thrown around the room. My pillows were soggy with salty tears from the fact that my only love was as good as dead. He's lucky to have lasted a year, as most patients would be gone after the first six months. Who is he fighting for? He has no family around, and I don't understand why he would fight for me. I'm just a simple boyfriend.

A year later, and I'm sitting here. Waiting for them to let me see him again.

Ever since that day he was diagnosed, the world around me changed. Underperforming in my job, writing less songs, earning less money, I'm close to being kicked out of our apartment. The CEO has moaned at me several times, saying how he will pull through and that I should focus on my job, but how can I focus when my only love is practically on his death bed, monitored twenty-four-seven? When Bangtan disbanded, I didn't stop writing songs, because I wanted to carry on making Seokjin smile with my lyrics. That's what has kept me going, giving me the motivation to carry on with my dream job. Working at a publishing company is not where I saw myself after leaving the group, and I definitely didn't expect sitting outside his hospital room.

The corridors were silent, the other patients in the rooms had either passed on or have been discharged. Seokjin got a lot of attention in his ward, due to his condition, so it would always be a while before I was allowed to see him. The walls were painted a dull white, yet if you peeked through the windows of Seokjin's room, you could see walls of pastel pink, stuffed teddy bears lining the shelves, and polaroids held up by strings and pegs across the room. He was going to live there for a while, so they allowed him to decorate the room to his liking. It resembled Seokjin perfectly, as if they spilt a pot of his imagination over the room. It reminded me of how he convinced me to paint our living room pink, which is why I've avoided that room for a year.

Whispers came from the doctors in the room, and the door swung open straight after. "Kim Namjoon?" I nodded in reply to the doctor, "may I have a quick word?"

The doctor, who has cared for Seokjin since he was diagnosed, stepped outside. He had brown, shoulder-length hair, which was currently tied up into a low ponytail. His white coat was too big for him, as the sleeves were halfway down his thighs - hiding his delicate hands - and the ends of coat touched his calves. His colleague next to him had the same white coat, yet it fitted him perfectly. He had black hair, styled into almost a bowl haircut, and brown eyes that sparkled just like the other doctor. "As you know, I'm Dr Yoon Jeonghan, and this is my colleague, Dr Choi Seungcheol, who is training to become a doctor specialising in the cardiovascular organs."

"Nice to meet you, Doctor."

"Seokjin has fought for a significantly large amount of time, longer than any other patient of mine, but I would consider...saying your final goodbyes."

"It is unknown when Seokjin will pass on, it could be tonight, it could be next month. Hell, he could even last another year. But, we don't think that Seokjin will be able to defeat his cancer." My lip started to tremble as Dr Choi announced his statement.

"We haven't found a cure for heart cancer, unlike many other forms, but - as we've discovered through this last year - chemotherapy won't be able to get rid of his tumour, and it's been getting worse for him." A tear rolled down my cheek as Dr Yoon spoke, the door opening soon after I was cleared up. "You may see the patient now."

"Joonie~!" Seokjin sung, sitting upright and sporting a gigantic smile. His face was whiter than snow, yet he made the atmosphere feel warm and welcoming. All of his hair was shaved clean off, and we couldn't bare him a wig because the doctors said it wasn't worth it. Although, Dr Yoon allowed Seokjin to wear the pyjamas of his choice, so today's attire was the pink and blue Mario top and bottoms I bought him for Valentines Day, with the words 'You're like a star, you drive me wild!' sewn in purple by the collar. He reached out for a hug, and held me tight. "I wish I never had to let go." He whispered by my ear, but then released as I sat down. "How's work?" He always asks about me.

"Alright, boss still wants to demote me, but I keep on pulling through for you."

"Why for me? I can look after myself." I fall silent after his words, fiddling about with my fingers. "Is Hoseok still a pain like you described him? I find him alright-"

"He went to Cambridge University six months ago, haven't heard from him since." I spat blankly, I didn't want to say another word about that rude so-called 'friend' that left me to care for Seokjin alone.

"Okay, how are your songs coming along? I bet they're wonderful." I stayed silent. "What about your cousin, Taehyung? Is he doing alright?" I kept my mouth shut. "What's wrong, Joonie? You can tell me anything-"

"SHUT UP SEOKJIN-AH!" I shouted, mentally pleading that the doctors don't come in. Looking startled, Seokjin took a few deep breaths, giving me the hint that I need to learn to control myself. "Please! Don't worry about me when you're stuck here in hospital! I'm stuck at home sick to the stomach about whether you're going to survive another day, but you seem like everything's fine in the world!"

"That's actually all I do, Namjoon." Seokjin interrupted my rant. "It's just the fact that I don't want to give my guests negative vibes." An awkward silence lurked in the air, soon disappearing as Seokjin pulled out an iPod shuffle and a set of earphones from his beside drawer. "I may not be able to do much, but as a cancer patient I'm allowed one wish. I made that wish to be that I recorded my own song for you. Do you want to listen?"

I nodded, pushing the buds into my ears before pressing play. "It's called Spring Day." Seokjin smiled, as the introduction began. "It reminds me of our first date."

The sun was shining bright, as Namjoon clasped a hold of Seokjin's hand. With food in one hand, and his boyfriend in the other, Seokjin couldn't feel any more complete. They walked along the pathways of Seoul Forest, whistling along to the afternoon birdsong. Seokjin spotted a small orchid tree, surrounded by hundreds of square metres of grass. It was the only one of its kind, the rest just regular oak tree saplings ready to grow - just like Namjoon and Seokjin's relationship. Laying down the checked blanket and getting comfortable, Namjoon pulled out his ukulele while Seokjin found a pain de chocolat amongst the other food in their 'Around the World and Back Again' theme.

"Wanna sing a song?" Namjoon asked at the full-mouthed Seokjin, who swallowed soon after Namjoon's question.

"Sure," Seokjin replied, sitting upright as Namjoon strummed the first chord to see if it was in tune.

"🎵Wise men say, only fools rush in, but I can't help, falling in love with you~🎵" Harmonising perfectly, they didn't care if a crowd built up or if they were isolated.

The afternoon went by in a blast, and they sure did have a blast as well. Eating the food they brought until they could explode, singing until they couldn't even speak without chugging an ocean's worth of water, kissing until their lips went dry. The day lasted until sunset, where they watched the glowing sphere float down behind the line where the sky met the earth. Radiant colours of orange and purple swirled through the sky like paint on a mixing palette. They gazed upon the practically cloudless sky, watching the stars appear together. Seokjin turned his head to see an awing Namjoon, and softly whispered in his ear.

"I can see you up there, Namjoon." The other boy looked back at Seokjin, confused at his statement. "You're my shining star, gazing down upon the world."

"Are you talking to a mirror, Seokjin?" Namjoon smirked as he replied, planting a kiss on top of the older boy's forehead. "Because every star is unique, and I don't think I'd be able to fall for anyone else but you."

"So, did you like the song?" By the time the final chord was pressed, I was virtually a waterfall, tears streaming down my red cheeks without any pauses.

"Jin, di-did you write that...j-just for me?"

"Who else would I miss that much?" Seokjin answered, "Certainly not any of my neighbours." He passed me the box of tissues beside his hospital bed, I wiped my undereyes several times before it stayed dry.

"Jin...I'm honoured...I-I don't know wh-what to say..."

"The thing is, Namjoon," Seokjin cut me off, holding onto my hand, "you don't have to say anything. You just have to promise me one thing."

"Anything for you."

"If I die today, if I die tomorrow, if I die next year, please promise that past the end of this cold winter, until the spring comes again, until the flowers bloom again, stay there a little longer. For me, stay there."

"Stay where?"

"By the tree, I will always be there, waiting for your return." He leaned in, cupping my head with his frozen hands. Our lips connected, my strawberry scented with his partially cracked ones. It's been a year since I felt this gorgeous feeling, where my heart flutters and my stomach's full of butterflies. I stand up from the chair as he sits up more, the pipes coming from his hands bashing against my soggy cheeks. His fingers become tangled in my bleached, purple hair, soon after my arms wrap around his neck.

But, I feel his grip on my hair weaken, his body starting to lie down, his lips disconnecting from mine, his eyelids fluttering like wings, the monitor next to him beeping rapidly. Doctors start to rush in, including Dr Yoon and Dr Choi.

"This is Dr Yoon, yes we need cardiovascular doctors in room 54 immediately."

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.

"I need revivers, and fast!"

Beep, beep, beep, beep.

"Get the antibiotics going, he needs all the help he can get!"

Beep, beep, beep.

"Clear!"

Beep, beep.

"We're losing him, clear!"

Beep.

"SEOKJIN!"

Silence.

-----

I sit underneath the cherry blossom tree, taking small bites of a pain de chocolat. It was a fine Tuesday in the beginning of Spring, where the sun was incandescent and the lake waters of Seoul Forest were shimmering like diamonds. Young children were wandering about, exploring the wonders of nature, but my mind goes in and out of focus at points as I try to think of a good melody. One couple does catch my eye though, and I try to listen into their conversation.

"Why are you so heavy, Chim-chim?" The mint-haired complains jokingly, placing down the boy with the blonde hair that was sitting on his back. They lay out a checked blanket as their conversation continues.

"I don't know Yoongi, like why do you act so tough, yet you are already too cute?" The other replies, sitting in between supposedly Yoongi's legs. Yoongi grabs a croissant from their hamper and feeds it to the boy, giggling as he tries to put the pastry into the mouth.

"Stop moving around, Jimin!" Yoongi laughs, kissing Jimin's neck once he starts to chew onto the croissant. He grabs a ukulele out of his hamper, just as Jimin asks if he can learn to play it.

"Wow, you can read minds!"

Yoongi places the instrument in Jimin's hands, wrapping his arms around his waist as he helps him strum the chords. They giggle as they fail at positioning Jimin's hands on the correct chords.

"Okay, sing louder than me 'cause I sound like a toy goose compared to you, angel." He helps his boyfriend strum the introductory chords, before beginning the song. "🎵Wise men say, only fools rush in, but I can't help, falling in love..🎵"

"🎵With you~🎵" I feel a tear roll down my cheek, as the memories of Seokjin are refreshed in my mind. I wipe it away, and carry on listening to the two boys.

Kim Seokjin may have died of heart cancer on Feburary 13th at 10:10am, but his love and positivity for the world will always live on, even in my cold heart. I hope people around the world listen to his song on repeat when I release it, and I will always remember his last words, on that day when I gave him those six orchids.

"If I die today, if I die tomorrow, if I die next year, please promise that past the end of this cold winter, until the spring comes again, until the flowers bloom again, stay there a little longer. For me, stay there."

"Stay where?"

"By the tree, I will always be there, waiting for your return."