He called me over the phone many times, but I did not answer. Eyebrows arched as I looked intently to the golden heart-shaped container. My hands could not let go of it. I grew skeptical about the timing of everything.

Was this fate's doing — to see Nathan's box of written letters and poetry on the day I said yes to Eric?

What did this mean?

Could this be Nathan's?

I took a deep breath, thinking about opening the folded paper on the count of three. I had been through so many secrets, and it was valid to say no truth could scare me anymore. I needed to know. I deserved to know.

So I read it.

"My dearest Avery,

Today is the day that our lives will change forever. You and I will live in a world built with our love and dreams, and away from the things that hold us back.

We will not run away and hide in secret, but I will be a man and marry you. I've saved up enough over the years, and I'm willing to offer all I have to you. I am a very lucky man to be loved by a woman like you. A gorgeous, loving, fun, and intelligent young woman.

You always asked me before why I chose you. That's not a very hard question to answer. It doesn't need to be asked. I love you because you're different than other girls who have as much as you. I love you because you're into writing as I am. I love you because you hate to swim and I liked it when you put your arm around my neck. But most of all, I love you because you believe in me. You believe in the man that I am, not the man that I will become. You believe in me, and that's more than I can ever ask for.

I hope you say yes. I love you with all my heart and soul. I love you more than no matter the distance, no matter the circumstance; in more languages than one.

                                                          All my love,
                                                                      Nate"

Taking a step back, I thought about what that letter meant to me or how it affected me. I didn't notice the tears until it reached my chin. A lot of possibilities and regrets jumbled in my mind as I stood still. A feeling of hopelessness and lost love.

I regretted I left him.
I regretted I didn't fight for him.
I regretted not loving him enough.

Now I would never know how he died.
Now my heart would never be in its happiest state.
Now I would never feel the same love.

But I couldn't do anything about it anymore. I made my choice. The damage had been done. And what had been lost would never return.

"Miss Avery..." Someone knocked on the door outside my room. I wiped my tears quickly and opened the door. It was the driver.

"I'm sorry to have disturbed you but Mr. Greddon insisted that you must return to the mansion. He said it's urgent," was his message.

"Okay then," I said, giving him a forced smile. I brought the golden container with me, close to my chest, as I walked out.

When I got inside the car, I looked at my apartment one last time. I had the best memories in this place. This would always be my home.

He drove faster than usual. I guessed this had something to do with Eric. After reading the letter, I had mixed feelings about going home to him. Uneasiness and short breaths— the same feelings I felt the day when we got married.

Finally, we arrived. I stepped out of the car and saw Eric standing outside the door, I wondered why. "Sorry, I didn't get to answer your calls. I was busy," was my excuse.

I apologized to him like how a teenager would to her father for staying out late with some friends nearby a lake. Even as my fiancé, Eric always struck me as an overprotective best friend. I still needed more time to digest everything at the moment.

"It's okay, hon, just get ready for dinner," he said and kissed my forehead. "What's that in your hand?"

I was caught off guard. I didn't think he would notice. "Nothing," I scoffed, "Just some junk I found in my apartment. I need it."

"Is it our pictures?" Eric asked.

"No, it's different." I thought about talking to him about our marriage and insisting that we probably were moving way too fast.

"By the way, about our wedding—" But I failed.

"I know what you're feeling," Eric interrupted, acting like the know-it-all he was. "You're being distant towards me because you thought we weren't gonna celebrate with your family."

"And that made my fiance sad," he added with a pouty voice, pinching my cheeks, both left and right.

"No," I laughed awkwardly, moving my face away from his hands, "I'm not mad at all."

Eric chuckled and said, "You're lucky you got me as a husband." He opened the door and familiar faces greeted me.

I was surprised by the crowd. Eric's family and friends were sitting on the couch, having some wine. But what caught my attention were the smiles from my parents shining through the room. Audrey was there as well standing too close beside my mother.

Seeing all of them made me realize all the things I longed for in such a long time ago were here, right in front of me. But why did I feel like there was still something missing?

"Oh my God," I gasped, "You're all here!"

Audrey was the first to approach me with a big hug. "I am so happy for you, sis."

"You're standing too close to mom, are you...?"

"Friends?" Audrey said. "Not quite there yet, but I'd say getting there."

I was as shocked as both of them. "Really? Audrey, that's..." I couldn't find the right words to say.

"I know," she replied with a smile, "but today is your day."

"Yeah...sure." I nodded reluctantly.

Eric put his hand on my shoulder and said, "Why don't you start the toast?"

"Okay, I just have to change first," was my reply.

I climbed up the stairs and went inside my room. The noise and chattering from downstairs distracted me from locking the door. I could tell by how slow I was closing it that I was dubious.

I needed him.

"See you in paradise, my love," I whispered, kissing the golden heart-shaped container I had been holding.

As I stepped into the bathroom, I turned on the faucet and stared at the running water filling the tub. I removed my clothing and dipped into the tub. Thinking about my idea of paradise was both taunting and satisfying. I knew it was all fantasy, but I was ready to go through extreme lengths to fulfill such a horizon.

I held my breath and submerged into the water, floating perfectly still and calm. I knew he was going to be at the other end, waiting for me to come running into his arms.

He was my true, undying love. I intended to spend the rest of my life fulfilling the promise of eternity with him in paradise, no matter what it took.

And when it was time I opened my eyes, I saw him.

He was there.

THE END