As much as I had wanted him gone, a part of me yearned to let him stay for a little longer. For a couple of months I have lived in this apartment long enough to realize that I wasn't as independent as I thought.

Now that someone I considered special has come back to my life, I kind of missed having someone like him by my side. No matter how much I tried bugging him off, I knew deep inside that I was only fooling myself into pretending not to miss him. Regardless of how deeply I concealed it, the vow I made with myself two years ago was the source of my strength.

I no longer wanted to hurt the people I love.

His reappearance was mainly a ruse spearheaded by the universe to keep me distracted from achieving a personal goal of mine, which was to leave my past relationships and start anew. When I made this promise of mine, I was certain that when I see him again, I'm likely to fail. And I know I will, but today is definitely not the day.

"Go away, Nate! We've been fighting for the whole day. I have to take this very important call in peace!" I screamed right at his swollen ear. As he moaned in agony, he listened to my plea with not much of a choice to argue. Unwillingly, he stood up, dusted off his pants, and wore his leather jacket. While doing so, he managed to eavesdrop.

"Good evening, Professor Brawston. To what do I owe the pleasure?" I asked, putting the phone closer to my ear. Walking around the room in circles, I pushed myself not to mind the clutter all over my room and reminded myself of the predicament I was in.

"You mean displeasure. You don't even like the guy! It says so in your journal, sweetheart. Enough of the niceties," Nathan said in a rather high intonation, striving to get hold of the phone.

Trying to save some of the dignity I have left, I stayed away from Nate. I didn't wish for Professor Brawston to hear the upset tone in my voice.

"Yes, I have called to inform you that you are no longer a student at Wixton Academy. Your absences were unacceptable. The university is afraid you'd be seen as an example to be emulated by the student body, considering your influence. For this reason, you are expelled, effective immediately."

"W-Wha-What! Expelled? What are you talking about? There must be some kind of mistake. Mr. Brawston, wait for a minu—"

Before I had the chance to explain myself, he ended the call. This body started heating up, burning sensations hovered in my chest and dug a hole right in the middle. As my hands were shaking uncontrollably, I tried to call him back. The line kept disconnecting. Feeling hopeless, I sat on the ground with both palms on a flushed face, on the verge of crying.

"Looks like you and I are going to spend more time than I thought," Nathan said, chuckling underneath his breath.

"Au revoir!" He added, kicking the books lying on the floor.

"You are...sick. How dare you take pleasure at my misfortunes."

"Woah, woah there. I'm sad for you, Carter. I really am. Just a little tip, deal with it."

With all the anger exuding from inside me, I pushed him outside the door and made him leave. I had no choice but to clean up the mess that he had left all by myself. I tried to remember all the horrible things that Nathan had done since he arrived to remind myself to stay away from him as far as possible.

Thinking of him as the bad guy eased the frustration I was feeling as I swept the broken pieces of glass from under my bed. Once I had finished, I took a quick shower to freshen up.

With all the time I spent contemplating in my bathtub, I've thought of stopping by Wixton tomorrow to talk to Professor Brawston.

As soon as morning came, I went to school immediately. Waiting outside Professor Brawston's office, I rehearsed my lines over and over. A bunch of other students passing by the hallway stared at me, probably wondering what I was doing there. Some even peeked through the glass windows to take a look.

After much rehearsing and praying for the best, I took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

"Excuse me, Professor Braws—?"

"Exit this room immediately, or I'm afraid I will have to call security to escort you out," he said, his hand gripping on the telephone.

"But, sir, you shouldn't! There must be something I can do." I begged with my hands clasped. I spoke even without his full attention, hoping he would hear me. He didn't bother to hang up the phone on my account.

"Yes, sir. Consider it done," Professor Brawston said, speaking on the telephone. As soon as his talk was over, he then looked at me.

"Ms. Carter, perhaps, there is still a way for you to evade expulsion. Wixton Academy will be hosting a Founders' Ball tonight, and you will be attending. Instructions will be disseminated once you arrive. Consider this probation. No questions, please. I'm quite busy."

Utterly confused but more relieved, I exited his office with a grin sketched on my face. It was a kind of grin mostly caused by joy and pride among all. Drops of sweat trickled along my face as I walked briskly toward the gates of the campus, thinking of several things at the same time.

Clearly, I wasn't prepared at all, nor was my mind able to process that I was about to be kicked out of school for apparently no reason. Then seconds after, the heavens have pitied me of my cries and suddenly brought in a lever for me to pull that would open a door of second chances.

Having left Wixton, I rode a cab on the way to pick an attire in a rushed timeframe. There were too many things bothering my mind at the same time, however, the worry was then overpowered by the gratitude of being given consideration.

When I arrived at the dress shop blocks away from school, I remembered I didn't have many friends to ask out on a date for the Founders' Ball. In the long process of picking gowns, I was troubled not only by the urgency of it all but with whom I'd be spending the night.

I was well aware of the stunt he pulled at my apartment the day before, but in our many years of friendship and something more, he was the only guy whom I could trust that would show up during desperate times when I needed him the most. With not much choice left, I swallowed my pride and texted Nathan about the Founders' Ball.

Having purchased my dress, I hurried to the nearest beauty salon and paid the best beauticians and stylists to style me up. As the hairstylist brushed my long, voluminous brown hair, I thought about what I'd done to face a grave penalty such as expulsion, when I knew that the mistakes I've done before were already settled. Nonetheless, it was clear that how I would look tonight was the least of my concerns.

A few hours later, I arrived at Wixton Academy wearing a silky, royal blue evening gown, strewn with shimmering pearls and beads at the corners.

The students, faculty, and staff were all in one giant room. My intention for showing up here was not to dance with any of my batch mates nor to drink one or two glasses of lemonade punch, but to talk to my professor and to solve this problem once and for all.

Everyone in the room was having fun. Everyone, but me. I couldn't help but notice some guys itching to dance with me. One boy pushed another, and his companions were all cheering him on. That's probably because I was the only one who wasn't doing anything.

To avoid even more awkward positions, I steered clear from the crowd and searched for Professor Brawston right away. "Excuse me," I said countless times as I passed between couples holding each other in intimate embraces beneath the giant, shimmering disco ball.

"Beautiful..." Nate appeared in front of me all of a sudden, wearing a neatly-pressed tuxedo and a daring smile painted on his face.

Startled, I smiled at him uneasily. I didn't think he would actually come considering that everything was in short notice. Looking at him all handsome and laid-back, unlike the apparels he usually wore, I might have gazed at his sturdy, attractive chest a little too much than expected.

"There you are! You look dapper yourself," I said, breaking eye contact when I realized my stares were only boosting his ego all the more.

"Dance with me?" Nate offered his hand.

"Why not," I replied, walking with him to the dance floor. All things considering, I told myself this dance was only my way of saying thanks, and nothing more.

As people began to step into the dance floor, the hired band played the most romantic songs of the '80s. Their mellow music set the calm, inviting ambiance in the venue. Bright lights above us shone at our faces, manifesting the joy we felt in those magically perfect moments. All the other couples danced their hearts away.

Nate and I enjoyed each other's company as well. Both of our eyes were locked and our arms automatically touched and blended at the right places; allowing ourselves to be subdued by the night.

As they say, every party needs a little drama to spice things up. Out of nowhere, Nate initiated a conversation, and as soon as he did, things began to escalate quickly and questions blew out of proportion.

"Two years ago, we made a promise to one another...that we would elope, far away from your family. I was ready to surrender everything for you. My mind was hardwired into believing we would spend our lives together, away from all the chaos. Away from all the drama. Away from all this."

"I know. I'm sorry... I —"

"I just have to ask. Why did you —?"

"I...can't. Nate, just, please. Don't make this any harder than it already is." I broke free of his arms around me.

"Avery..." He looked at me in the eyes, hoping for an answer we both knew I wouldn't dare give.

"Nate, you and I are history. And besides, even if we try to make this work, both of us know it won't end well."

Ambushed by the dreaded reminiscing of the past, I left the function hall without so much as a goodbye, not even to Professor Brawston. When Nathan uttered those words, he painted the very image I thought I had already torn apart in my mind. As I ran outside, I knew I had to talk to Professor Brawston again to explain why I had to leave the ball so soon.

Evidently, being reminded of the worst mistake of my life was crushing me in ways I couldn't bear. The promise of forever that we both shared, though it was all now in the past, distracted me from worrying about the problems that I now face in the present.

I no longer had the time to call a cab or to hitch onto a distant friend's car since I wanted to leave right away. So I ran as fast and far away as I could like a damsel in distress.

The smell of raindrops that just descended from the heavens to the asphalted cement reminded me of times I beat so hard to forget. It made me more emotional; and at that moment, the memory I buried deep in my heart revealed itself from its crevices.

Hearing footsteps other than my own, I turned back to see that Nathan has been following me. He hugged me from behind, and his head leaned on my shoulders. As his grip tightened the more I struggled to let go of him. And the more his deep, slow exhales echoed through my ears, the more I felt his heart beating so fast.

I knew what I had to do; the consequence be damned.

"Why would I want to be with an outsider?" I spat. "Nathan Trevmore, your social status is at the bottom of the ladder. I am destined with bigger things, while your destiny lies only in your dreams. I need not worry about money, or taxes, or fame. I have enough to suffice my granddaughter's granddaughter, and so on. I have the whole world wrapped around my finger. One word and everybody will work for me. Men will go to war for me. That's how powerful I am!"

His face was confused about my rage. And so was I. The moment I began pouring my heart out, I lost control of my lips. Even I was shocked that I could hurt the man I loved for the longest time. Even I was afraid of myself.

Rage has the ability to turn the tables around, and it can never, even for good reason, be solved by using it to attack itself. Smothering a fire with rage would obliterate an entire rainforest.

"No. That's how powerful you were! Past tense, Carter. As you slowly cancel out everything money can buy, everything handed down to you, everything you received without as so much working for it, you realize that you have nothing. The very powerful Avery Bridgette van Carter, daughter of William Alexander and Elizabeth van Carter, possessors of God knows what, elites of God knows where had no power at all."

"You didn't want to be that girl anymore, because, in spite of everything you have, you were deprived of the simple pleasures in life, of experiences that come only once, of meeting people who allow you to feel the most intense, mind-boggling emotions, like a never-ending rollercoaster ride. That's what you have always wanted, Avery. That's the Avery I knew. The Avery I loved," he said, trying to stop his tears from falling.

I saw in his sad, troubled eyes that he was crestfallen. And so was I. After all that's been said and done, he left without saying a single word. He walked away like a beggar who had been denied with scraps and alms — completely lost, oblivious, and hopeless.

Even if it pained my eyes to see, I took a good look at him leaving. I watched him walk away. A thought of chasing after him crossed my mind, but I told myself it had to be done. I knew it was for the good of both of us. So I let him be.

"Avery?" A familiar voice sent chills through my spine. I knew that when I turn around, my life would change forever. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was a man I had known my whole life.