Days floated into weeks for life at Hogwarts, and before the eldest Bulstrode child knew it, she was standing a week prior to the worst day in the world, ( and it's not something she wishes to get into. ) the worst day, that was bound to send her into a fit of over dramatic demise, was also the date of her birth and a holiday made upon pink frilly flowers and chocolate. She had been born both in the middle of a vicious thunderstorm that crackled the night skies as her mother hollered in pain, and in the middle of the one holliday in the year that was dedicated to celebrate love.

She chooses not to see the irony in both of those situations.

It was almost hilarious that the time of year where her birthday rolled around in her fifth year, was the same time when homework started stacking up. She wasn't sure when she started neglecting her schoolwork, exactly, and it wasn't as if she didn't wish to do it. It was the fact her mind couldn't focus long enough to write a complete sentence, she would find herself sitting for hours gazing at nothing lost in her mind as she thought about Cassandra Nott's notebook.

Winnie Bulstrode had taken it upon herself to find answers about the missing people mentioned in the pages, and while she certainly should be looking for something to calm her and center her instead of people long since forgotten, she found herself lost in mystery.

It didn't take much to figure out who Regulus was, for once while Winnie imagined Sirius Black being the one who was married to Charlotte Nott, with the mention of Regulus being the one who was missing and Charlotte not loving him as she should, she could easily put two and two together. It became clearer to her then, remembering Regulus A. Black's name in the family tree back at Grimmauld Place, connected to a face that had been burned off the tree. At the time, Winnie had found herself paying very little attention to the details, too lost in her emotions to observe information like she usually would.

Finding Regulus Black in Hogwarts was perhaps easier than she suspected considering nobody spoke about him at all. She had stumbled upon a picture of him in the floating glass box that held all the Quidditch trophies and past teams posted. Winnie had been walking down to the Great Hall for dinner when she passed, spotting Harry's father's name under Chaser, only to glance to the side and spot a black and white picture of the Slytherin team that same year. It was the narrowed face male, that stood out front that caught her attention, for he looked scarily like Sirius Black that she had halted in her steps completely.

Upon closer inspection, she spotted the differences between the two instantly. While Sirius' hair was straight and smooth like silk, his brothers laid in soft curls on top of his pale features. He was narrow like Sirius, tall and lanky as he held onto a broom with his gloved left hand. Winnie could tell that he held the grey eyes of the Black's, but unlike Sirius' who had grey eyes that looked like molten silver, sparking with mischief and impulsiveness that held his emotions so close to his heart. Regulus' eyes were a darker grey, clouded in a control manner. She watched as he moved, his lip only tilting up slightly in a manner before it fell away, his actions stiff and held together like every respected pureblood male she has ever seen in her life.

The differences between the brothers was striking, and if it wasn't for their last names or similar narrowed faces, she would've thought they weren't related at all.

It was Charlotte Nott who was harder to find, it was as if she didn't exist at all. While Regulus Black was mentioned in several year books she had found in the library, all for Quidditich, a small club called the Slug Club and for his high raking marks, she found nothing for Charlotte. It had frustrated the brunette to no end, for it seemed quite impossible for the female to not exist at all until she had stumbled upon a group of yearbook pictures in a book that was so deeply hidden away, she had coughed for a straight two minutes with dust filling her lungs.

There, tucked deep into the back of the book lay a page she has never seen before, as if the other yearbooks were missing this particular page. Just two weeks after she had found Regulus Black, she found his wife staring up at her from a dusty page.

It was easy to tell she was a Nott rather quickly, she had the same honey blonde hair that she remembered Theodore Nott Sir having. It ran long around the lanky female's shoulders, disappearing behind her back each time she inclined her head to the side ever so slightly. Her hair sat in wide ringlets, while her green eyes sparkled with a familiar dull green, the same ones she had come to recognize upon Theo's face.

It was almost hilarious to her, how his aunt, even years before Theo's time, was so used to occluding that she did it even for pictures.

Charlotte's Nott face was petite, gentle in such a way that Winnie couldn't help but think that she was perhaps one of the prettiest girls she has ever seen. With high cheekbones that sparked pink in the picture up at her, her nose upturned slightly in a way that reminded her of Theo's nose. Charlotte smiled only slightly in the picture, all false and wrong on her, but smiling all the same as if she had practiced right before the picture was taken.

Seeing the forgotten faces of the past was frightening to Winnie, for while the wizarding world held many faces of the dead, it was this pair that seemed to not exist at all. And yet, yet they did all the same. There was proof in cursive words and pictures of ghosts staring back up at her with no answers as to who they were or what happened.

It drove Winnie mad, and while she perhaps shouldn't be obsessing over lost souls, she found herself incapable of not.

It seemed as if all Winnie Buldstrode did lately was obsess, her nose always stuck in a book or her fingers stinging from the unresolved emotions in her chest, and while she hadn't spat up blood since that one horrid night, she suffered in different ways. Sleeping was a thing she found herself doing only when she managed to crawl herself into her bed and not hunched over a table.

It had gotten so bad she nearly caught her hair on fire one afternoon in Potions, someone had nudged her just in time to catch herself, but unfortunately not fast enough to stop her hand from coming in contact with the scolding silver cauldron.

Which led her exactly to where she sat right now, her hand held out and being wrapped in a white cloth after Madam Promfrey spread burn gel over the small red splotch that had started to blister against the surface of her palm. Winnie had endured a string of disappointed stares towards her from Snape for the first few seconds before she disappeared towards the Hospital Wing, she had walked, cradling her hand to her chest and wishing she set her hair on fire rather than her hand. ( This was a lie, if her hair was set on fire she would punch someone without a second's thought. )

"You should be able to take this off within two hours, the gel works pretty quick but still," Madam Promfrey instructed, securing the white bandage that circled three inches around her wrist, and stopping right over her knuckles. The brunette lady waved her wand, emitting a tiny yellow glow before the bandage secured into place. "You should be more careful Miss.Bulstrode," the women warned, her wrinkled hands tapping the blonde's wrist softly before she let her hand drop, Winnie's own hand falling to her lap as she traced the bandage with her forefinger on her unburned hand

"Thank you Madam Promfrey, I'll be fine," Winnie stifled a yawn through her lips, tiredness aching away at her bones as she rubbed at her eyes, the scratching sting as her eyes widened. The air swirling around the dryness from the lack of water and sleep, making them sting far more than what she was used to.

"Child, how much have you been sleeping?" Madam Promfrey questioned, stopping her from getting off the bed as the women's hazel crescent eyes stared hard over the young girl's face. Winnie's lips pressed to a line, blinking furiously as she tried to get up once more, realizing she had left her bag with all her books in the classroom.

"I'm fine Madam Promfrey, really. Just a harder night's sleep last night, that's all," the girl smiled, brushing it off as she stood close, straightening her shoulders and smoothing a hand down over her crumpled robes and allowing it to fall swiftly around her feet.

"I always say they work you kids harder than they should," the brunette crumpled, shaking her head as she pressed her lips into a line, her eyes tracing over the young girl who shifted on her feet, itching to leave the scrutiny of the healer's eye. She was the first person to ever point out or question the lack of sleep that slowly progressed to worse rather than better, it made her shoulders tense and sting the muscles that were tightened beyond measure. "Just make sure you get a good night's sleep dear," the woman instructed, tapping her hand against the young girl's cheek. Winnie bristled at the action.

She was completely fine.

"I will, thank you," she pulled her lips into a thin smile, tucking a loose strand of hair out of her face that trickled down from the loose ponytail she had pulled out of her face with an ebony ribbon that morning. Turning on her heel, she sauntered quickly out of the Hospital Wing, almost running into a group of second years that were heading towards their next class. The blonde sighed, tugging on the edge of her ponytail as she breathed heavily from her mouth, dragging her free hand down her face. Class was already over by now, meaning she would have to walk all the way to the dungeons and interrupt another class, though she supposed one bonus was at least that she had a free period now.

Letting the door swing shut behind her, she quickly made her way down towards the dungeon. Her feet stamped against the stone steps, moving quickly to avoid being stopped on a moving staircase. ( That had happened once during her five years at Hogwarts, she was in her Third year and just decided to sit there on the step for the rest of the class period. )

Her shoes clicked against the floor as she entered the dungeons, the air swirling around in a circle of chilly air. The dungeons were always glowed by the flickering yellow light from the lanterns laid upon the surface of the grey walls. There were small portraits and the statues of knights stood heavy upon the grounds, watching over the coming students. The dark grey stone of a serpent with its mouth stretched open in a wide gape held the entrance to the Slytherin common room — she knew this only because of Cordelia.

She was almost nearing the entrance to the potions classroom, nearly passing an alcove when she heard the whispered voices of her fellow housemates. One of them being connected to the pendant that continued to rest against her skin under her shirt, she haltered, eyes narrowed as the whispers of the words 'Occlumency' and 'Snape' twirled around her ears.

Winnie was never one to listen in on conversations, perhaps it was her raising or maybe it was the way she hated finding out people listen in on her conversations without her knowledge. And yet, she found her feet frozen to the ground, the edge of the alcove barely there where she knew Harry, Hermione and Ron stood huddled together, engaged in a whispered conversation.

Occlumency was a talent many purebloods knew well, she had heard many conversations of the topic in her own home. ( ex home. ) Her father had mentioned it once at the dinner table, calling it a gift of camouflage, trapping your every emotion behind a mask. Occlumency was a type of magic that allowed one to simply feel as numb as the white snow kissing the grounds, your emotions stayed trapped within your mind while the outside world saw what you picked for them to see. Winnie had never bothered to learn more about the subject, it was never something Hogwarts would teach their students, because it was never something you would expect a child to learn and prevail at. It was the main reason behind Winnie halting her feet and freezing like an icle, wondering why her classmate would need to know Occlumency and much less, learning it with Snape.

Her eyebrows pulled down around her face, remembering Harry's words of being able to feel Voldymoldy ( that was her name for the vile creature, saying his name felt too much like giving a source of power to him that she felt he didn't deserve. ) emotions. Is that why he needed to learn Occlumency, but if so, did that mean Voldymoldy could hear Harry's thoughts? A sudden chill ran down the course of her spine, causing her hands to press against her side, the surface of her wand pressing into her bandage hand. Suddenly, a hand clasped around her shoulder, causing her to let out a shrill yell in surprise, wand flying into her hand and twisting to point at whomever grabbed her. Heart racing, she saw red scorch the depths of her soul, she expected the hand to turn to the crook of her throat, gripping the muscles until she gagged and gulped for oxygen that would never come.

But instead of the frigid, gaunt works of a hand she suspected, she was washed with the feeling of familiar warmth pressing against the surface of her robes, hooded juniper eyes twisted into her vision, eclipsing the momentarily terror that burst through her system. Theo's eyes flickered down to the tip of her wand that rested under his chin, digging into the beating muscle of blood. Winnies lips fell open slowly, heat flushing her face as she quickly pulled her wand away, stoving it back into the pocket of her robe, eyes blinking slowly in recognition. This was Theo, her Theo, this wasn't a mirage of the demon that absorbed her sleepless nights. His lips slowly opened, bushy eyebrows furrowing against his forehead as he stood preprelled over her. His lanky figure resulted in him looking as if he was folding like a card over her as his hand slowly moved to the surface of her cheek. As if he sensed the inner dilemma that raged inside of her mind, she wondered for a moment, just exactly how he knew.

"Winnie?" Her attention snapped like a rubber band being stretched far too wide, cracking back to reality as her face turned beyond her shoulder, meeting the three pairs of eyes of her housemates. Hermione's bushy hair ran like a halo around her head, ringlets falling in a series of waterfalls as she stared with her honey eyes narrowed in question. Ron Weasley stood behind her, freckles darting across pale skin and bright ginger straight locks kicking against his forehead, his stature towing over the two beside him. Harry Potter was the nearest to the alcove, half of his shoulder brushing against the stone with robes eschewed across his body, messy ebony locks stuck up every which way, with beady upturned shaped green eyes watching. "Is everything alright?" Hermione finished, her eyes darting between the two as Winnie nodded, perhaps too fast, for she noticed the way Ron's eyes tightened around the corners, bright blue eyes screwing in on Theo. Realizing where this situation could be heading, the blonde quickly cleared her throat.

"Everythings fine, I was just heading back from the Hospital Wing to get my things," she paused, raising her bandaged hand for them to see as she placed a smile across her features. "Theo just startled me, that's all. Where did you guys come from?" Keeping a smile across her face as the three of them shared a questioning look between each other, she could feel Theo tense beyond her shoulders, his arm brushing against her back. She wasn't about to admit that she was listening in on their conversation, nor was she trying to get anyone pied off, guessing by the way she could still see the accusation in Rons eyes, it wouldn't take much for the ginger to get twisted at a Slytherin.

"Oi Nott, why don't you just bugger off?" Apparently she was correct, for the redhead gave a twisted scowl towards the brunet who stood behind her, his tone as chilly as it was bitter. Winnie narrowed her eyes at him, her lips furrowing into a frown with little to no happiness burrowed deep within it.

"Ron, he didn't do anything," Winnie replied quickly, sending him a scowl of her own, lips curling in a disdain on her left side as the redhead glanced at her. He scuffed, which earned him a small nudge in his side from Hermione who threw him a narrowed gaze look designed across her heart shaped face.

"Oh come off it, he's a Slytherin, and besides his dad is a Death Eater, the apple doesn't fall that far from tree," Ronald Weasley always did have the tendency to speak before his mind could catch up to his words, Winnie knew this only because Hermione was the one to tell her so. She knew the brunette loved her friend dearly, but as the words twisted from her mouth Winnies own lips twisted into a deep scowl, eyes narrowed and shoulders squared.

"Well Weasel, with that intelligence you must be getting top marks," Theo drawled from behind her, his tone as bitter as the thoughts that raged through Winnies own mind. The blonde twisted her head to the side, just in time to see the way his shoulders tensed for a flicker of moment, before relaxing as if his entire flare of anger swelled back inside of him. He spared one glance at her, before turning and leaving the four lions alone, her emotions flickering after him as a surge of anger forced its way into her body. Her foot lifted, itching to run after him until she remembered the presence of the trio behind her, she could slightly hear the familiar sound of a scolding come from Hermione Granger. Suddenly, the acidic taste in her mouth made sense, for it wasn't only her anger she was experiencing. Turning, the blonde's feet carried her forward, setting her eyes on the redhead who so stupidly opened his mouth. Her fingers stretched down around the fabrics of her robe, her eyes flared an furious ember as she came to stand an inch away from the taller male. Hermione and Harry had come to a silent stop, the two of them had been quietly arguing towards the redhead who looked as red as the hair that ticked on top of his head. Almost instantly, the sound of a slap radiated off the walls, Winnies bandaged hand fell down to her side. The action of slapping the boy had caused her hand to erupt in agony, pins and needles stabbing into her burn, but all she felt was the look of anger that radiated off Theo. Rons own words rumbling around in her mind, reminding her of something she had locked away deep within herself.

"Now you listen here Ronald Weasley, and you listen well. Because I'm about to tell you something that I have never, ever told anyone," she snapped, her lips curling into a deep seated scowl as the redhead slowly looked at her, a handprint flaring across the side of his freckled face. "Notice how everyone but me in my family is a Slytherin? Yeah well, my father was in school when good old Voldymoldy walked the halls, and can you guess who decided to join him?" She questioned slowly, her eyes narrowed and head tilted upwards to stare the boy right into his eyes. "That's right, my father. My father was a Death Eater, so are you going to look at me and tell me the apple doesn't fall far from the tree?" The redhead swallowed slowly, his eyes flicking to his friends while hers stayed glued to his face, watching his every moment like a snake.

She felt it the moment shame had burst through his pride, tasting sour in her mouth as she screwed up her mouth, forcing herself to swallow.

There was one thing not many people knew about the Buldstrode family, and it was the very fact that Winnie's father was one of the original Death Eaters. She had seen his mark only once, faded as it may have been, it still haunted her very being for everything it had stood for. It was by accident that she had seen it, it was the Yule break of her third year. Where she stole away into a cupboard during the middle of the night, cookies stoved into her mouth after her parents had made her skip another meal. He had been particularly drunk, stumbling in and cursing about her mother under his breath, it wasn't long before he had found her. Her body crawled into a fertile position, trying to keep herself as small as possible, as if it would prevent him from finding her.

He had found her, as he always did.

His faded mark had flashed in front of her face due to his rolled up sleeves as he reached to grab a hold of her, she had just started studying with Hermione during that time. So the sight of the skull with the serpent crawling out of its mouth was enough to send her into a frenzy. She had kicked and screamed, her nails biting into his skin as she tried to tear his greasy hands off of her. Granted, he had only gone as far as pulling on her tangled hair and causing bruises to form around her torso and stomach like it was a decoration on her skin. It was still enough, however, for her to avoid Hermione like the plague when she returned to school.

"Yeah but he's a slytherin and-"

"Oh for Godric sake! You're so bloody dense. News flash, not of that shite matters, and if you still believe it does, perhaps you have to take a very good fucking look at yourself and ask yourself why it matters. We have a much bigger enemy than pointing fingers at each other and blaming each other for our fathers mistakes. How about you get to know someone before you accuse them of being a bloody Death Eater. Because if that's how you want to look at it, make sure you call me one too." She spat, narrowing her eyes further as she sucked in a breath,swallowing thickly before turning her attention to both Hermione and Harry. The blonde squared her shoulders, getting ready for any comment they could throw at her, perhaps even look at her in disgust. Instead, she was greeted with wide eyed expressions and their lips parted, at least for Harry. For Hermione's expression quickly floated into a frown, brown eyes sleeping with pity. It was enough to make one drown in a pool of anger and resentment, Winnie Buldstrode absolutely did not wish to be pitied. Instead, the brunette nodded once, before swirling on her feet and making her way to the one place she assumed Theo would disappear off to.

Unfortunately, it was the same place she couldn't get into on her own.

Standing in front of the serpent statue, her lips screwed into a line she raised her fist and banged loudly against the stone. Really, she had no idea how to exchange with the snake, nor did she know how one goes about trying to enter the snake pit. She figured knocking was simply her best bet, and well, half of it was because her anger still rolled off her in waves, and she truly did just want to punch a pillow.

Finally, after what felt like an hour of knocking, the serpent's mouth parted, causing her feet to stumble backwards and her raised fist to fall helpless to her side. Slowly, a black wooden door appeared, where it opened to expose a head of platinum locks. She bristled, preparing herself for one out of two people who could appear from under the locks. But as her eyes traced down the person's face, seeing the small, slightly upturned button nose much like her own. Winnie realized she would have much preferred if it was Draco Malfoy answering the door.

"What do you want?" Millie drawled, cobalt eyes sparkling in narrowed slits as the blonde tossed her large ringlet curls over her shoulder. Her Slytherin robe was discarded, leaving her in the Hogwarts grey sweater vest, the tip of her Oxford blouse peeking out with her green and silver tie. She sported a plaid skirt with black stockings pulled over the bare skin of her legs. There were small faint freckles darting over her nose and cheeks, and for a minute, Winnie grew uncomfortably aware of how much her and her sister looked truly alike. Their hair fell to the same length, stopping at their mid-bake with straightened, they had the same nose, same upturn of the cupid's bow in their lips. While Winnie was slightly more curvy, Millie stayed thin and bony. If it wasn't for the difference of their eyes, they could be mistaken as twins.

"Is Theo there?" Winnie questioned, her tone clipped and controlled, all of her anger vanished slightly at the sight of her sister. Millie had started to become more of a constant in her life than she ever was since their time at Hogwarts. Though it was never for the reason that mattered, it was due to the factor of Millie appearing everywhere Theo did as of late. Winnie had even taken notice of the fact that her sister had started sitting next or at least near Theo during eating times in the Great Hall. Winnie tried her best not to notice, she tried her best not to stab her food every time she saw Millie flutter her eyelashes as the brunet boy as if he was the most attractive boy in the entire school. ( If asked, Winnie would argue that all boys in Hogwarts were as ugly as Hippogriff dung. )

"What do you want with him?" Millie questioned slowly, her body leaning against the doorframe as the rest of the door pressed into her side. Winnie sighed, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms across her chest, wishing her sister would just answer a question for once in her life.

"Would it kill you to just answer the question? Besides, it's hardly any of your business what I need Theo for." Winnie replied matter of factly, sticking her chin in the air as her sister's lips pulled into a small smirk, her finger coming up to twirl a false curl around her finger.

"As a matter of fact, he is here, but I need him for a little something," she giggled, her left eye pulling into a wink as Winnies stomach twisted painfully, her mouth falling dry. She felt the same rage that burned within her everytime she saw Millie touch Theos arm or laugh as if he was the funniest person in the world. "I'm afraid you can come by later, or you know, don't come by at all." Millie waggled her fingers, smiling before going to close the door. Winnies eyes widened, her feet taking her to surge forward the same time she heard the familiar voice of her cousin behind her. She watched as her sister's lips pressed into a frown, the same time Cordelia's voice trailed around them. Turning, Winnies eyes landed on the brunette as a sigh of relief left her mouth.

"Oh thank Merlin," the blonde sighed, stepping towards her cousin who was looking between her and the entrance with furrowed eyebrows. "I need to see Theo and this cow is being a bloody idiot," Winnie growled, turning her head slightly to throw a glare at Millie who returned the gesture with her own scowl across glossed lips.

"Why do you need to see Theo?" Cordelia questioned as she walked closer, ignoring Millie who started speaking rather quickly, arguing that Winnie wasn't allowed to come inside, which only earned an ignored glance from Cordelia and Winnie sticking her tongue out at her sister as she stepped inside the common room. Winnie opened her mouth to explain why Ron Weasley was an idiot, but decided better on it once she saw exactly who was sitting around them as they entered.

"Long story, which I promise to explain, just not here. Look I really need to see Theo okay?" It never occurred to Winnie just how strange she could be coming off to Cordelia, considering two months ago, she would never try to enter the Slytherin common room in the search of a boy she swore she hated. But really, all that floated through her mind was the acquisition of Theo being exactly like his father. Winnie didn't know much about Lord Theodore Nott, she had only ever seen him during Galas or at dinner parties her parents threw, he didn't have a job per say, nor did people think fairly highly of the man. But anything she did know about Theo's father was nothing that Theo was showing to be, and the assumption that he was anything like the vile excuse of a man his father was, sent her mind in a frenzy.

"Okay follow me, he's probably in his room," Cordelia replied after a moment, her eyes flashing with unspoken worry as her hand folded into Winnie's own. The blonde smiled, nodded her head in a silent sign of thankfulness. It was only then when Winnie finally looked around the common room, seeing couches of black leather sprouting around the room, a fireplace standing tall and wide next to a small wooden table. But the thing that caught her eye the most was the wide clear windows on the far wall, casting a green hue from the light of the Black Lake. She watched in awe as a school of fish swam by it, tails flickering in vibrant colours of pinks and yellows. "That's beautiful," she commented quietly to Cordelia as they passed by it, entering a small valley of steps that twisted and turned upwards.

"Well what did you expect? Skulls and bones everywhere?" Cordelia questioned, a snicker falling from the surface of her lips as she continued to pull her upwards through the stairway.

"Well duh," Winnie teased, her tongue clicking against the roof of her mouth as she nudged Cordelia who sent her a false glare over her shoulders. Winnie erupted into a series of small giggles, her bandaged hand coming up to cover her lips as they came to a stop in front of a door labeled 'Fifth Year'. Cordelia raised her hand, knocking softly before the muffled sound of a 'come in' Cordelia turned the brass knob then, the door falling open and exposing five beds all set up in a circle. Green glow trickled in from the wide windows that stretched across the far wall, creating circles against the dark brown of the wooden floor. Emerald bed curtains were wrapped around each bedpost, three out of five were pulled while the others were open exposing the bodies of the teenage boys in the room. For a moment, Winnie was briefly surprised to find the occupants being both Draco and Theo, existing in a calm nature without killing each other. However, her eyesight snapped to Theo, seeing him leaning back against the surface of white pillowcases, a book opened and propped on his lap as his legs stretched out in front of him. His tie was discarded, leaving two buttons of his white Oxford shirt undone and exposing the skin of his chest slightly. Her face flushed as she caught herself looking perhaps far too long than appropriate, tearing her gaze away, she looked back up at his face.

"You have a guest, Millie was bombarding her at the door and I saved her, you're welcome," Cordelia grinned slightly, nudging Winnie in the door further as the girl sent a narrowed eyed gaze towards her cousin who simply grinned with self pleasure.

"Winnie? What are you doing here?" Theo questioned, his green eyes flickering between the two as his eyebrows furrowed. His body leaned up, hair falling in front of his eyebrows as his tongue darted out to smooth across the surface of his bottom lip. Winnie shifted on her feet, suddenly feeling as if her entering the common room like a maniac was really the best option or not.

"I- well, you sorta-" she paused, hearing the quick, tumultuous closing of a book snapping shut on the other side of the room. Her head curled to the side, watching as a platinum blond boy stood abruptly, his arms crossing the surface of his chest with silvery eyes darting between the trio before landing on her like a bomb. The blonde sighed, rolling her shoulders already knowing what was about to happen, she twisted on her heel, facing towards Draco Malfoy as he ambled over towards her.

"You can't be here Bulstrode, if you need someone to satisfy you needs, go find someone of your own kind," the male drawled, coming to a stop not far away from her as Winnies lip opened in a bitter chuckle, her eyes rolling at the mention of someone needing to satisfy your needs.

"Oh Merlin Malfoy, get a new line honestly, perhaps you need someone to satisfy your own needs," Cordelia sighed from her spot next to the door, Winnie snorted, casting a gaze to her cousin who was rolling her blue eyes in what Winnie suspected was both boredom and annoyance.

"Leave her alone Malfoy, she can be here if one of us allows it. Pretty sure both me and Cordelia allow it," Theo exhaled, closing his book and placing it on his bed stand before standing. His arms crossing across his chest as green eyes narrowed his gaze towards Draco, the blond stood at least two inches taller than the brunet, but Theo seemed all the more intimating with his locked jaw and narrowed eyes.

"Oh I see, trying to get both of them are you? Figured you'd at least have better taste than these two sla- " his voice trailed of his jumped back slightly, Theos body surged forward, only to be stopped as Cordelia's hand came out to wrap around his forearm, Winnies hand coming in contact with his chest, both females blocking him from moving.

"Finish that sentence Malfoy, I dare you." Theo warned, his lips snarling and curling with venom. Winnie was acutely aware of the fact he could easily get out of her and Cordelia's hold on him, but he made no move to, however. Only standing with his shoulders rigid and hand curling into a fist at his sides. The blonde sighed, blowing out a heavy breath of air, she was incredibly sick of everyone's attitude in wishing to fight that day. Letting her hand fall from Theos chest, she stepped in front of him, body facing Draco as she narrowed her eyes at the pampered blond who she was itching to hit again.

"I already hit a Weasel today, don't think I wont hit a fucking ferret too," Winnie snapped, pointing a finger at him as he glared at her with melted moulten eyes. "It's really none of your business why I'm here quite frankly, but the next time I hear you call my cousin anything that assumes she's a slag, I'll finish what Moody didn't get to do." The female threatened, eyes tracing over his face as his eyes twitched, deciding not to give him another moment of her attention, she turned on her heel, facing Theo and Cordelia once again as she sniffed, keeping her chin high.

As soon as she heard the shuffled footsteps and the sound of the door closing behind her, her shoulders shagged. She tucked strands behind her ear, chewing on her bottom lips before deciding to take a seat on someone's bed. Not really caring about who slept there each night, she just cared about needing to sit down after yelling at two people not even ten minutes apart.

"Did you say that you hit a Weasel?" Cordelia questioned suddenly, breaking the silence as the brunette took a seat next to her, her leg crossing up in under her as Winnie snorted.

"He deserved it for opening his mouth," the blonde shrugged, turning her head to the side to look at Cordelia who frowned, her eyebrows dragging down across her forehead in confusion. It was only then why Winnie remembered why she needed to see Theo so badly, turning her gaze towards him, her face fell from the small smile and instead pulled into a deep seated frown. She found him sitting on his bed, elbows pierced into the surface of his knee, green eyes already pierced on her. The female breathed in heavily through her nose, she watched as the surface of his shoulders moved from within the lines of his shirt. She felt the dip of the bed move, causing her attention to turn to Cordelia who had stood.

"I promised I'd help Tracey with ... something, so I'll just," she paused, pointing towards the door before nodding her head and walking swiftly towards the door and disappearing beyond the wood, clicking behind her. The air shifted around her, stinging her with a sugar substance as Cordelia left, making her have the feeling that Cordelia didn't have to be anywhere. She frowned, staring at the oak wood for a moment before she looked back at Theo. She became aware then of the fact that she sat in his bedroom, well, he shared it with four other boys, but still his bedroom. It made her cheeks flush and before she knew it, she walked briskly, packing across the surface of his bedroom to try and forget that she was in fact, in his bedroom alone with him.

"This is completely ridiculous, I don't know why I'm here ... you probably think I'm mental," she rambled, wringing her hands together before she brushing her finger across her bandage, her bottom lip slipping between her teeth, wishing she was able to twist her silver ring that was restricted beneath the surface of the bandage. Halting, she shook her head, breathing in a deep sigh before making her way to the door. This was completely insane, she shouldn't care how he's doing, why did she want to come in here so badly? "This was a mistake, I'm sorry i'll just leave you to whatever you were doing." She mumbled, drawing her tongue against the surface of her teeth as her blood pounded in her ears, this was beyond stupid. Why did she do this?

Before she could even make it past the surface of his bed, a hand came out and wrapped itself around her wrist, stopping her from leaving, from running. She squeezed her eyes shut, head hanging downwards as the fingers around her wrist tugged her closer. Her tongue darted across her teeth once more before she let her body move towards him, her hazel eyes slowly opening. She was left standing in front of his knees, his hand wrapped around the wrist of her bandaged hand, while his thumb moved softly against the skin of her arm. She twisted her lips into a frown, eyes tracing every inch of his face, noticing a small brown dot next to his left eye, right in under the start of his waterline.

"I uh ..." she paused, swallowing thickly as she shifted on her feet, feeling the tops of his knees brush against her thighs through her skirt. "I wanted to see if you were okay," she finished gently, feeling his hands slowly trickle down from her wrist and over the surface of the white bandage. She glanced down, watching as his fingers traced the emprit of her ring, her spine trickled with a cold sweep of air as he moved to place the back of her hand up to rest against the palm of his own.

"Are you okay?" He asked quietly, his hand curling hers close before twisting up to her wrist. The pads of his fingers made her skin flicker like it was set on fire. Her heart grew quicker, thumping against her chest like a sledgehammer, bumping in her ears as her eyes switched to look at him. Finding dull nothingness with the sincerity of his words, and despite herself, her heart burned, stinging painfully.

"Why don't you let me feel your emotions?" She questions quietly, feeling his thumb pause against the rubbing of the inner side of her wrist, he stared at her, frozen for a moment before he shook his head.

"You don't want that," he argued, as Winnie scuffed, shaking her own head this time as he looked down, fingers still wrapped around her wrists. Perhaps she didn't want that, perhaps feeling his emotions would break everything they had built since the beginning of the year, and yet, she found her heart breaking with every moment he didn't. Everything he said felt lifelessly and false with no emotion behind it.

"Please," she whispered, feeling his fingers squeeze her wrist once. It was quiet, nothing but a dull silence as she held her breath, almost afraid to breathe as if it would shut everything away. After a few more moments of nothing, she sighed, turning her head to sigh as she opened her mouth to tell him to forget it, that it didn't matter, but then she was burning.

Emotions collapsed so harshly into her mind and body that she felt herself stumble, only to have Theo's arm snake up around her waist and catch her before she stumbled back on the bed across from them. Her mouth watered, filling with a harsh tangy taste that she had come to instantly recognize as anguish, her chest heaved with it. Being replaced with such two emotions that made her eyes squeeze shut, her hands coming up to brace herself against the top of her shoulders as she tasted vanilla in her mouth, mixing with the familiar taste of chocolate and berries she loved to eat late at nights when her world was quiet.

Her body was overwhelmed, slightly trembling as she forced herself to try and take a grasp on what he was feeling, all of it nothing she had experienced before and yet she felt herself becoming addicted to it. It didn't leave the same imprint as the harsher, more bitter taste did. Instead of burning with uncontrollable magic, she was standing with the feeling of safety and calmness washing over her, and despite the fear that came with it, she opened her eyes to look at him.

She sucked in a breath, meeting a wild burning gaze of sea green. His pupils were dilated, as wide as black saucers staring pointedly up at her as if she was the sun. They trickled towards her in awe, bright and swimming with so much emotion it almost caused her to stumble. The look that glowed in his eyes was a look she had never seen before, and yet some part of her instantly knew what it was. With a sinking feeling she remembered every word, every time they had insulted each other so bitterly and sworn nothing but hatred for each other, and yet none of it matched up to the gaze he glued upon her now.It was an intoxicating feeling, causing her lips to part and her throat to fill with a lump.

"Please dont look at me like that," she whispered, not knowing when exactly she came to stand in between his legs. Or when his hand had moved to rest against her hip, all she knew was the way his eyes glowed towards her. She didn't deserve this look, someone else did, someone far better who didn't ruin every chance she got. Her hand moved to place itself on his chest, right over the surface of his beating heart. Feeling her heart flutter inside of her own chest, she felt the quicken pace of his own heart under his shirt, beating furiously against her palm.

"Like what?" He questioned softly, tilting his head to the side as the hand not resting against her hip raised to tuck a strand of hair that fell loose from her ponytail behind her ear. His hand came to rest against her cheek now, thumb moving softly under the surface of her eye. She felt the fear trickle into his own chest and swirl towards her, his fingers trembling against his face as vulnerability ate him alive. Despite her better judgement, she moved into it, feeling the warmth swirl through her cheek and awaken the best parts of her. She watched as the glow of the lake trickled in around him, casting a mellow green light over his shoulders and face. Long eyelashes curled across his eyes and touched the tips of his eyebrows, she darted her tongue across her bottom lip, and with a deep exhale, she watched his eye track the movement.The same look trailing back up to her eyes but with more urgency, as if she was the gravity keeping him still, keeping him grounded. As if ...

"Like you love me," she replied, her words thumpling off her lips quietly, barely heard over the beating of her own blood in her ears. The feeling of his heartbeat twisted through her palm, heating the coldness and creating a pool of warmth in her stomach. Everything suddenly made no sense at all to her, yet everything in this moment felt right. Her stature melted like honey, giving away to him in a bittersweet tug of her heart and mind. He couldn't love her, it would be foolish to love her. She didn't even like him.

And yet, as he sat up straighter, his chest nearly grazing her own in a swirl of wind and air, she allowed him to gently drag her face down closer to his. She allowed him to keep his hand stilled across her face, allowed him to reach up and tug the ribbon out of her hair. She nearly gave away as the smell of cinnamon and spice twirled around her nose, a smell she so sweetly placed with nothing else but him. His breath mixed with her own, brown and green staring at each other with a look of such sincerity it burned her from the inside.

"I think I do," he whispered against her lips, voice trembling as the hand not against her face tucked into the locks of her hair. She felt his finger twirl a lock of hair, smoothing it out between the pads of his pointer finger and his thumb. She sucked in a breath, feeling a surge of selfishness, because he certainly should not love her. She would destroy him, she would eclipse his light with her darkness until there was nothing but ash and crumpled desire left.

But perhaps, he was just as selfish as her.

For suddenly, his face surged forward, his own lips crashing against her own in an awkward gesture of crushed noses and teeth clicking together. She stilled, fingers curling and clutching the fabric of his shirt as she pressed the palm of her hand into him further. She felt his hand press against her face, felt his shoulder tense beneath her fingers, almost as if he was second guessing this. His lips moved against her frozen ones for a moment longer, before she felt him slowly pull away. But before he could fully, she surged forward, moving her lips in a jumbled, awkward way against his own. Her fingers gripping the fabric of his shirt tighter, eyes squeezing shut as she held onto him.

It was only then when he shifted his head to the side slightly, his hand melting away from her hair and falling to her hip as his fingers squeezed into her hip bone. Pulling her tighter against him so her chest was pressed into his own, despite herself, she wrapped her free arm around his shoulders, a stifled whine left her lips as she felt his emotions surge into her. Her lips moved softly, hesitantly against his own, their teeth no longer clashing and clicking. She felt the fire that burned in her chest, burning them both, searing them together by fire. She felt his tongue dart out to lick against the surface of her bottom lip, nudging her mouth open slowly. The taste of bitter coffee and mint swirled around her as she nipped down on his bottom lip, emitting a groan from deep within his throat. Just as she felt his hands push her closer, the clicking sound of a door opened swirled through the room.

Jumping back, she tripped and fell down on her behind. Eyes wide and cheeks flushed a furious red she watched as Blaise Zabini stepped into the room. His mouth opened to speak until he saw her sprawled out on the floor, hair a tangled mess and cheeks crimson like cherries. Her eyes filtered to Theo the same time Blaises did, seeing the boy shifting awkwardly on his bed. Cheeks flushed and lips bruised, brunet locks standing up every which way on top of his head.

"My bad, continue on you sly dogs," Blaise winked, backing out of the room with a vicious smirk trailed across his face. Winnies eyes widened further, her body quickly moving to stand herself up as she smoothed down her hair. Cheeks a violent red as she stood awkwardly, scolding herself for her raging beating heart.

"I uh .. gotta do," Theo trailed off, coughing as he cleared his throat and shifted on his bed once more. His emotions were locked so quickly away, she felt nothing but a dull coldness engulf her in its wake. The female nodded, chuckling as she waved her hand through the air.

"Homework right... yeah me too. Uh see you later," she sniffed, before letting her feet carry her out of his room and down the stairs as quickly as possible. She avoided the winking gaze Blaise sent her from his spot next to Cordelia and Claire, instead she simply nodded and continued her way out of the common room. It wasn't until she was near the familiar location of the Gryffindor Common Room when she finally stopped, her back pressing against the bitter cold stone, eyes squeezed shut as her finger trailed over the surface of her bottom lip.

Her first kiss had been with a boy she had spent the better half of her life insisting she hated. The feeling of his slightly chapped lips pressed upon her own was seared into her memory, the look that fastened across his face trickled through every aspect of her being. She realized, with a sickening twist of her mind, that she burned inside and out for Theo Nott, whether she truly accepted it or not.

༺♥༻

       Winnie always liked Astronomy, the idea of watching the stars and darting each constellation that danced across the night sky was like an involuntary dream of a hobby for her. She didn't, however, enjoy the fact that Hogwarts classes for Astronomy didn't end until nearly midnight. She had just finished a class after trudging through the hallway that night, her fingers wrapped around her purple toothbrush as she brushed her teeth. Her eyes stared blankly at herself in the mirror, light brown eyes staring back at her like a faucet of her emotions.

Ever since her situation ( for a choice of a better word ) with Theo earlier that day, she had hogged herself away in her dorm room. Starting over pages of books and wishing she could forget about the feel of his lips on hers, wishing she could forget that look the burst in his sea green eyes as he stared at her. Wishing she could forget the utter feeling of adoration and love that floated from him.It was no good, however, no matter what she did, he was in her mind, like an addiction set loose through her bloodstream. It was as if he was glued to her very being, following after her like a ghost and whispering the feeling of him admitting he may just love her. She didn't want him to love her, she didn't want any part of her to appeal to him, she didn't want him to look at her as the sun rises and falls because of her.

And yet, the more she told herself that the more she felt her heart crumple at the idea of him not feeling that way.

With a grumble groan, she spat out a wad of toothpaste spit, running the water from the faucet over her toothbrush as Hermione Granger appeared in the mirror beside her. A bottle of face cream in her hands with her hair pulled into a very poorly made bun on her head.The blonde froze for a moment, staring at the girl through the mirror. Her and Hermione hadn't spoken since the scene with Ron, though Winnie wasn't mad at the brunette, she had still slapped and yelled at the girl's best friend. She figured loyalty would overthrow her here, no matter how right she was.

"Hi," Hermione started awkwardly, a small smile pulling onto her face as Winnie cleared her throat toothbrush still in hand.

"Hi," she replied softly, thankful for the smallest gesture between the brunette, she stuck her toothbrush back into her mouth, brushing the row of her bottom teeth as Hermione laid the blue bottle down on the counter.

"Look, Ronald was completely out of line, and I don't fault you for what you did or said... as far as Theo goes, he doesn't seem completely terrible." Hermione sighed, opening the round bottle as Winnies face flushed at the mention of the brunet boy, images of his wide seafoam eyes and the feel of his lips pillowed against her own flashed in her mind. Hermione must've noticed the sudden flush of her skin for the brunette smiled slightly. "He looks at you like ... well you know." The female giggled, waving her hand as Winnie almost choked, her face blaring as red as the hair kissing the tops of the Weasleys heads.

"Er yeah ... I guess," Winnie sputtered awkwardly, spitting out into the sink before turning on the faucet, grabbing a washcloth and placing it under the water.

"If you like him, nobody would care, you know." Hermione sighed, dotting white swats of lotion on her face. "Not saying that you would care or anything ... oh I don't know, I'm not good at talking about these things, but you're my friend and well, you can talk to me about these things. " Hermione rambled, waving her hand before smoothing the white dots into her skin. Winnies lips pulled into a frown, staring at the running water that trickled out of the faucet. To be completely truthful, if she were to speak about boys with anyone she would go to Cordelia, but the simple action of offering to be there suddenly made Winnies lip twist into a small smile.

"Same goes for you, you know, if you ever like anyone." The girl chuckled softly, picking up the blue cloth and twisting the water out of it so it didn't drop everywhere. She smoothed the wash cloth over her face, silently debating on if she should even tell Hermione on the fact that she kissed Theo or not. Suddenly, she allowed her mouth to work before she could second guess herself, pulling the cloth from her face.

"I kissed Theo."

"I'm dating Fred."

"What?"

"What?"

The two girls blinked at each other, their lips opened in shock as the realization of Hermione's confessions trickled through her mind, suddenly every time Hermione spoke about being in the library and not being there made sense, all the secret glances and blushes between the two clicked together like a series of puzzle pieces. Winnie blinked, looking over at the furiously blushing girl who still had half of the lotion smeared into her face.

"You're dating Fred?" Winnie questioned slowly, watching as Hermione nodded furiously. Her attention drifted to the rest of the lotion on her face as she continued to rub it into her face. "How did this happen?"

"Well uh.. Last year really. We started dating this year during Christmas, but last year during the Yule ball, he saw me crying over Ron and Viktor, he cheered me up by doing one of his stupid pranks and well... I don't know, it's a little mad isn't it?"

"Absolutely insane," Winnie laughed, smiling softly as the brunette nodded her head, brown eyes wide and bursting with emotion as she blushed and shrugged. "It's cute though, let me know if he treats you poorly, ill hex him." Winnie teased, winking as the brunette rolled her eyes, despite the smile that cracked on her face.

"Don't worry, I'll hex him and then you can have him after I'm done," Hermione spoke in a sing-song voice, causing the blonde to laugh softly, nodding her head. She seriously betted the poor guy who would ever hurt Hermione Granger, they would need all the luck in the world. "So you and Theo, huh? Can't say I'm surprised."

"There's no Theo and me," Winnie argued, shaking her head quickly as Hermione grinned, humming in response as she placed toothpaste over her blue toothbrush. "I mean... I don't know how we even kissed. We were just talking, I mean not really. I was gonna leave and then he stopped me, and then next thing I know I'm falling on my arse because Blaise flipping Zabini walked in on us!" Her hands fell dramatically to her side as she leaned against the counter, Hermione spitting out her toothpaste, wiping her mouth with a towel before she grinned, sending her a knowing gaze as she bounced on her heels.

"Like I said before, you and Theo, huh," the girl questioned, nudging her with her shoulder as Winniw groaned, shaking her head as her cheeks flushed. She trailed back to bed, mumbling a quiet goodnight to Hermione as she shut her curtains closed around her bed, falling back against her bed with a heavy sigh. Squeezing her eyes closed, she twisted onto her side, suddenly wondering when exactly everything became much more complicated than simply her hating a boy.

But as she allowed herself to fall in a catalyst of darkness, she started to question just exactly how different was the line between hate and love.