I remembered the next day as being incredibly murky. They picked us up in a helicopter. I remember dismantling the hut and finishing off the last of the smoked fish. There was a certain sense of melancholy to the situation. I'd spent a long time in the small abode and seeing it nothing more, left a pang of sadness run through me.

Eli squeezed my hand as we began trekking up the mountainside to the plateau where the helicopter landed.

It was my first time ever having a helicopter ride and I remembered watching the world blur by with a certain feeling of awe.

"Here," Eli tapped me on the shoulder and passed me a cup of coloured liquid, "drink up,"

"What is it?" I asked.

"Sleeping medication," He replied honestly.

I gave him a look of confusion, "Why do I need to sleep?"

"Because you're tired," Eli laughed, "and we've got a long ride ahead of us and you can't be awake when we get to our destination,"

"I don't have a very good history with sleeping medication," I pointed out. Eli nodded.

"I know, it's the rules. Don't worry, I won't leave you. I'll be with you for every single step. I'll protect you," 

I looked up into his eyes, earnest and true.

I can do this. I took in a deep breath, steeling myself. I slipped at the liquid. It surprisingly lacked taste of any kind. I can do this. Before I finished the drink, I began to feel woozy. Eli took the cup from me and rested me on his shoulder as the world grew black.

...

"Marian," A whisper, the cold was the first thing that seeped into my bones. It was a lot colder here. Not in the arid sense but in the humidity that couldn't be escaped. It reminded me of home. "Marian wake up,"

"Where are we?" I breathed, stirring.

"Come on, we've gotta go,"

I took a few moments and a lot of willpower to stir from the darkness. I looked around, dazed. 

"Where are we?" We were in a clearing of some sort, surrounded by a thick layer of trees. Snow dotted the ground in sparse amounts. It'd just rained. I realised. Were we a little further south? I wondered.

"In the forest, come on," Eli helped me up. "Here's your clothes, I need you to get dressed," He handed me a cloth that I recognised as one of the dresses from the Claiming ceremony.

"Where?" I was shaking off my grogginess. I realised that behind Eli stood a stern-looking man who was our helicopter pilot from before. Eli gave him a nod and he took the trail 'back'.

"There's a set of rocks over there," Eli gestured, "otherwise there's uh, pretty much no one else around," My cheeks flushed at what he was proposing. I began my trek to the handful of rocks.

Apparently I wasn't allowed to wear shoes, or pants. Just the long, white dress that reached to my knees. It was my baptism, Eli explained. There was the elder who was going to be there. If there was ever a time to be quiet, now was it. Eli spoke carefully with a quiet reverence.

We trekked though the forest, my feet freezing. I studied the trees around me, trying my best to decipher where we were. Eli led me to the riverside. By it, were four people; a thin, wiry man who stood in a formal-looking dress shirt, a larger stern-faced man stood behind him. The second man held a special gravity around him, he was definitely the Elder. Besides them, stood two parents holding a baby. I recognised the child as Angel and her parents. I tried to stop a grin from showing.

It was Angel's dedication and they went first. Eli and I stood on the riverside watching. It was a few vow-like words followed by a sprinkling of water and a prompt cheer. Then it was my turn.

I'd been baptised in my church when I was eight years old. I'd been looking forwards to it for some two years. It was the crowning achievement for a church-raised kid. I remember the feeling of celebration and when I'd returned. Seconds later, slipped on the steps out and fell back in. I'd always joked about getting a double baptism.

This was entirely different. Where there was warm water at home, this shot up my bone like ice. Where there was a moderately sloped pool at home, this was a riverbed of rocky stones. By the time the two of us had gotten to the waist-deep section, I'd already lost feeling in my feet and some of my legs.

"Do you promise to uphold laws and teachings of our community?"

"I do," Maybe not.

"Do you promise to uphold the teachings and commandments of your elders?"

"I do," Definitely not.

"Do you promise to teach and to serve your husband in strength and meekness as determined by the law?"

I paused for a second, looking up towards Eli who gave me a half-smile.

"I do,"

"Do you realise and understand that when you leave these waters, you will be emerging anew, with a new purpose to serve the community in any way that you can?"

"I do," My voice was firm, my commitment was not.

"Then arise, anew," The Elder held out his hand, expectantly. I realised with a start that he was expecting my hand. I held it out. His grip was firm. Eli also held my hand. He gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. From the folds of his clothing, the Elder produced a stamp-like object.

"This might hurt," Eli whispered. I tried not to scream. The stamp was a brand and I cradled my hand, biting back tears. Eli had to receive the same. Because, of course, he wasn't a true member of the community without a wife.

Eli, was my 'dunker' and placed me safely so that the water rushed overhead. For a brief second, like I did in my childhood, I wondered if they'd ever pull me up. Seconds later, I broke the surface, throwing wet locks of my hair off of my face.

A splutter of a clap back on the riverside and Eli helped me out. The two of us shuffled through the forest, my parka from the trials acting as my only protection against the cold, my hand still throbbing.

"Congrats," He kissed my hairline, wrapping me in a tight embrace. We shuffled back up the trail, his arm tightly around me, "you're one of us now,"

My stomach dropped, I made sure to scold it for that. Pushing through the dread, I threw up a grin at Eli. "It's been crazy," I admitted. "Where are we going now?"

"A treat," Eli grinned, "then we'll have to return back. We need to start making preparations and then you'll be recommended to by the elders on the results of your training,"

"Nice," I gave him a small, tight-lipped smile. Preparations for what?

Faster than I expected, we made it to the carpark. There were three cars parked; two Utes and a very nice looking sedan. Eli turned to chat with Angel's parents as I tapped her on the nose, causing her to often burst out in a fit of giggles. Eli turned back to me, a grin on his face.

"Let's go," He opened the door of one of the utes.

"Where to?" I asked slowly, getting in on the other side.

"Top secret," He gave me a wink, a bloom of excitement ran through me and I jumped in on the other side.

It took me a little while to realise what Eli meant. It wasn't until we were parked in a carpark did I really know what it meant. 

The car was parked outside of the supermarket, people; mums with kids, shoestring budget university students, families, couples, spilling in and out at all times.

"Need to top up some supplies," Eli grinned, "let's go!"

My hand trembled by the door handle. I struggled to breathe. I was here, this was it. I just needed to make a break for it and then it'd be all over. 

"Aren't you worried that someone will recognise me?" Every word was a struggle to get out. Eli shrugged.

"Nah, this place is pretty small, we should be okay,"

"Right," I whispered, my hand on the door handle. I was going to do it, if I just opened it quickly, made a run for it. Where was the nearest Police station? Maybe they could help me.

"Let's go shopping!" Eli was a little kid, oblivious to my internal struggle.

I thought of the baptism, of the weeks spent in absolute isolation, of all the things Eli had done for me, lying in bed with him at night... Maybe I can't.

This may be your only chance! My mind raged at me. I hardened my resolve. My hand creeping over the door handle. I could do this. I could. I had no other choice if I wanted to be free.

The second I was going to burst out, a ute pulled in. I jerked away from the door, shocked at the sudden action. It was Angel's parents. They gave us a wave and a grin, hopping out of the car.

Operation Escape has been delayed. I thought dully to myself, sliding out. I set my hand in the crook of Eli's elbow and threw him a cheesy grin as we walked inside.

I never expected to appreciate a supermarket, but here I was, taking in the consumerism and the sheer grandeur of it all. I winced at the sales and watched in wonder as a child, chewing lollies passed me.

I was hungry, I realised, my stomach stirring.

"Anything you're looking for?" I asked curiously.

"Not particularly, a few things here and there but some of your friends will be getting married soon so you might want to find them some practical things as gifts,"

I gasped, "How did they do?!"

"Haven't heard much from the second group, but everyone in the first made it out well," He gave a tight lipped smile, "we were closely contesting for first but your friend, Jane and Robert got in first,"

"Hey," I laughed, Eli thumbed through some of the non-perishables, adding them to the cart, "you still haven't told me what happened when you wouldn't reply on the radio!"

"Another story for another time," Eli spoke grandly. I rolled my eyes.

We wandered through the aisles without real purpose. I chose a few soduku books and two more narrative stories. Eventually we found ourselves in the hygiene aisle and I paused, thinking. Pads, tampons and the other achievements of the female, modern age laid before me. My stomach stirred uneasily as I tried to think. Training was six weeks, another two weeks of survival; it'd been almost seven weeks since-.

No, I shut that though down seriously. We'd never done it on my cycle, sometimes under weeks of high stress.

No, I assured myself, definitely not.

I still grabbed the test anyway.

...

Eli had thrown me an odd look when I'd sent them through but otherwise remained quiet.

"Some of the other girls get worried," I laughed it off, "real wedding present right there!"

"Okay," Eli laughed.

We'd left the groceries in the backseat and with Angel's parents, had gone to the local cafe. I ordered a hot chocolate and Eli did the same. We both had a hand placed in the other's and I looked around in silent wonder, watching the Christmas decorations twinkle against the ceiling and the music flit through the air.

"All done?" Eli asked, Angel's parents were finishing up too. My stomach lurched, here I'd been giggling like a schoolgirl and drinking hot chocolate while my escape window slowly grew tighter and tighter.

"Yeah," I managed, "just need to run to the toilet real quick,"

"Sure!" He pointed it out. Just the hall behind me and on the left. I got up and walked over, noting with a pang of disappointment that there was only a single entry point in and out.

There was something else on the forefront of my mind. Once I was inside, I pulled out the test from before. Waiting it was like a mountain of anxiety like no other.

"Please don't resort me to a teen mum," I whispered, clenching the it with both hands. I wasn't sure what I'd do if it said positive but I knew for certain that I definitely wasn't ready. What would I do with a kid? Abortion was never an option in my mind but it would seem tantalising if I could actually get out. Eli would want to keep the kid and the community would see it as an outright celebration.

"Lord, I can't have a kid, no way," I sobbed. I couldn't, I was a teenager! I needed to escape! There wasn't much out there for me with a year into my Fine Arts course but I might be able to make something out of it.

I thought it was joking when the test results showed. Despite my almost raging hysteria, there was an out-of-body peace to the results.

I took a deep breath in and out, doing my best to gather myself. Pocketing the result I went to wash my hands. The woman besides me was topping up her lipstick. Her eyes flickered towards me, then down, her forehead creased and then she looked back up.

I washed my hands, feeling removed from the world and its woes. I glared at the slightly round stomach that I would never be able to rid myself of.

"Y-You're that girl," The woman besides me gasped, I looked up, she was staring right at me, her hand poised in mid-flick of her lipstick, "the one whose been missing for months, you're her!

A set of chills ran down my spine. I was pregnant, but here was my chance. How long had I been in here? Was Eli suspicious? I turned to her with a trained calmness.

"I can't leave," I confessed, "it's gotten a lot harder. Tell my family that I love them and I'm trying to get out,"

The woman scrambled for her purse.

"Don't go out there for a few moments," I warned, suddenly breathless, "he's probably armed,"

She gave me a curt nod, pressing the phone to her ear. I took in another breath, gathering my wits and putting on a beaming smile. Eli was waiting at the end of the hallway.

"Hey," He grinned.

"Hi,"

"Thought you'd never get out," He joked, I moved quickly up to him. I was torn; split down the middle. I wanted to escape more than anything yet now I had new allegiances.

"There's a woman in there who recognised me," I spoke in a low, rushed voice before I could help myself, "she's calling the cops,"

Eli's jovial smile turned serious, he gave me a curt nod. "Well, let's get moving then," Eli turned to Angel's parents, giving them a quick look. They understood immediately, opting to leave via the front entrance. Eli led me through the back entrance and into the main shopping centre. He was gentle, but his grip was firm to make sure that he wouldn't loose me.

"Where are we going?" I asked, we were moving quickly, almost a sprint. Eli was focused and sure, he knew this place very well.

"Back entrance, on the opposite side. They'll bring up the ute and take the express lane into the wilderness. At best we'll have about twenty minutes before we have a sizeable force with us,"

"Right, okay," I spoke uncertainly as Eli led me down the main set of shopping elevators.

"Freeze or I'll shoot!" Came the cry from behind us. I turned, still being dragged by Eli, to see a cop standing at the top of the elevator stairs, his gun pointed at us.

"Eli-,"

"Come on," Eli insisted, tugging me further. I broke into a run, his hand still firmly clasped around mine. He let me through what appeared to be a staff hallway. It too a few twists and turns. "We're almost there!" Eli insisted. My chest was breathing heavily, the starvation and fatigue from the past three weeks catching up with me.

We hit a dead end. The doors before us standing tauntingly. My heart kept into my throat, there was a door on either side but they were all locked too. We were so dead.

Eli spun around, looking down at me. His eyes were honest, true. He was incredibly calm.

"Do you trust me?" His voice was quiet, his breathing heavy. Distantly, the cops rounded the corner. My stomach tied in knots did I trust Eli? Was I willing to put my life in his hands?

"Stop!" They cried behind me.

"Of course," I whispered, a small smile stretched across his face. In one, swift movement, Eli spun me around so I was facing the cops, his arm was across my body, pinning me to him.

"Stop or I shoot!" Eli shouted to them, distantly, I was aware of the barrel of Eli's handgun pressed to my chin. My stomach flipped wildly.

This wasn't a part of the plan! I wanted to cry. It worked, the cops stilled their guns still raised. Behind me, Eli was firm, his breathing a normal rate. How can you be calm in this moment? I wanted to cry.

I took in a deep, shaky breath, looking to the cops. My hands were raised, trembling palms.

"Put the guns down," Eli called, his voice strong. There was a slight hitch at the end of his words, or maybe I was imagining it. I kept my mouth firmly shut but tears began to pool in my eyes.

I should've just made a run for it when I had the chance. I'm such an idiot.

"Look kid, you don't need to do this," One of the cops spoke diplomatically.

"Down!" Eli cried, clicking off the safety, I flinched away. He was actually going to do it. The idiot.

I wanted to clench my eyes shut, to assure myself that it was all a bad dream. Though the cop's expression in front of me spoke otherwise. Their faces were pale, and slowly, they raised their hands to place the guns on the floor.

I am positively screwed. I wanted to cry.

There was a sound behind us, as if the door was breaking in. Within seconds, the door was flooded in light, temporarily blinding me. We were moving; Eli hauling me through the doorway. For a second my feet couldn't reach the floor. Then we were running through the blinding light.

"You took a while," Eli hissed. It was Angel's Dad, he'd gotten us out of the hallway, "we've got two of them behind us," I stumbled to the other side of the ute as Eli got in. He leaned out of the window, firing off two warning shots.

"Great," Her Dad grunted, jumping in the second car, "I'll take the highway,"

"Easy," Eli shouted, starting up the car. The cops reached the doorway, firing a few rounds before we were out of the car park. I ducked my head. "You okay?" Eli shot to me, pulling out onto the main road, cutting off a swath of cars who honked aggressively.

"I-I," I managed, I'd been in high tension situations before but nothing like this.

"Are you okay?" Eli repeated, his voice hard and his eyes glued to the road.

"Yes!" I cried, struggling to get my breathing under control. Eli was looking like he was approaching another main road out of the town. My hands were clasped to the door as he sped across three lanes to overtake the cars.

I looked to him, dodging in and out of cars like a maniac. Eli's eyes were wild and his breathing heavy. His hair was ruffled, strands falling out of his braid and I tried not to blush, thinking the last time it'd been like that.

"What are we going to do?" I asked, my voice low as he took the exit into another town.

"We need to swap cars to loose these guys, then I'm going to radio in and the guys back home will call off the chase,"

"Wait," I asked confused, "they can do that?"

"Call off a chase?" Eli asked, "yeah, I mean, we've got people in almost every station across the providence and then some at the other levels,"

My stomach dropped as I gained an idea of what was happening here. There must be thousands of people in this... community across the country. I wondered if they were international too.

This made my chances of a successful escape that much more difficult. Imagine escaping only to be caught halfway across the country and dragged back, kicking and screaming. I tried not to cry. How did I get caught up in this mess? I remembered back at the baptism, they had helicopters, guns for training, thousands of people living here.

I am so in over my head, I did my best not to break down. How can I know who's legit or whose a double agent?

"Hey," Eli whispered, pulling up in a dodgy-looking car park, "it's gonna be okay, can you grab the groceries?"

I nodded numbly, almost falling out of the car. My mind elsewhere, I looped the bags around my fingers and dropped them in the back of the blue sedan that Eli had picked up. It took two loads and we were driving again in the span of less than a minute.

It took another car swap but eventually Eli's tension subsided and the sirens in the back ebbed into the distance. We were reaching the outskirts of the wilderness and I was struggling to remember all the sign names passing by.

"Marian..." Eli spoke softly, I looked up, "I have a question,"

"Yeah?" I asked curiously.

"I know you want to leave," A lump formed in my throat. I watched Eli carefully as he chose his words, "and back there... In the cafe, at the supermarket, even during the rush to get out, you had every chance. I guess I'm asking-,"

"Why didn't I go?" I rasped.

"Yeah," Eli spoke sheepishly, "Yeah I guess I'm asking that,"

I took in a long breath, the trees rushing past with greater intensity. For a second I thought about it- everything. About home, about my family waiting for me, about wondering the country without any idea or direction that I wanted to take. About how I found myself at the community not on my own accord. About how even in my darkest hour, Eli chose me, he picked me up from the rubble, decided that I was worth it and cared for me. Was gentle, was kind. In a place where I didn't deserve it. So I loved him for it.

"I didn't have much of a purpose when I was first... taken," I managed slowly, "but over the last few weeks I've come to realise that the community was really what I needed to find my place in the world... With you," I spoke slowly, hoping the words sounded right.

Eli took his hand up in mine, giving it a small squeeze. I played with the threads of my dress, it was still slightly wet. Slowly running the words over in my mind, I gathered the courage to speak them.

"Eli, I-," I took in a deep breath. He was driving down the main road, maybe this wasn't the best time to tell him. He was looking at me as much as one could while they were driving. I had his attention, "Eli, I'm pregnant," The words rushed out pregnant, I was too young to be pregnant.

He slammed on the breaks, pulling the car over into the ditch. 

For a moment we stopped. He was breathing heavily. A fleeting thought wondered that he might kill me.

"Are you serious?" He breathed turning to me. I slunk down in my seat, biting my lip. I managed a small nod.

"Yes," my voice was raspy. Oh no he's gonna hate me.

Eli was still for another few seconds. Looking out the front windscreen. I was still, not even daring to breathe. In one, swift motion he unlocked his seatbelt and got out of the car.

Oh no, I've really done it. I watched Eli carefully as he circled to the front of the bonnet, looking out into the distance.

He picked up a handful of snow and threw it, suddenly turning back to the car. He rushed up to my side of the door, swinging it open. On his face, the biggest of grins.

"You're pregnant?" He asked again. I nodded, laughing. "You're actually pregnant?" He gasped, looking around in shock.

He ran up the bank, occasionally slipping in the snow. He stood at the top, his hands in a victory pose.

"I'm gonna be a dad!" He yelled out to the world. I got out of the car, on the other side of the road was a full view of a small town. "I'm gonna be a dad!" Eli cheered again. I laughed, my hand on the roof of the car, watching him.

He slid down the embarkment, rushing towards me and enveloping me in a tight hug, swinging me around. The world spun around us as we both laughed. Eli placed me down, planting a full tis on my lips.

"I love you," He breathed heavily, his breath curling in the snow.

"Me too," I whispered back, flakes of snow beginning to fall around us.