Chapter 22: meekness ≠ peace

I had no sense of time while inside the isolation facility. Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras na ako roon and it seemed like every second passing made me lose my sanity. I spent my hours staring at my unending reflection, thinking about the comfort of home and my books.

The isolation was wearing me down, and it wouldn't be long before I broke.

Why was I in this situation again?

Ah, Wolff Glass.

Naputol ang pag-iisip ko nang bumukas ang isang salamin at pumasok ang unipormadong tauhan. The opening of the door made an annoying hiss. Binuksan niya nang maluwag ang pinto, na kanina ay hindi ko mawari kung saan.

"Please, the meals are ready."

Tumayo ako sa kama at lumapit sa pinto. The guard guided me towards the equally eerie white hallway, hanggang sa huminto kami sa tapat ng puting pinto. Nang binuksan niya iyon, naroon ang mahabang mesa kung saan nakaupo si Kruger.

Gaya ko, tila bagot ang kanyang hitsura, but there was something more in it.

"Help yourself," sabi ng gwardiyang sumundo sa akin at tinuro ang tray na naglalaman ng pagkain. Kruger's food was in front of him too, ngunit hindi pa niya iyon ginagalaw. He stared at me silently, ngunit tila nangungusap ang kanyang mga mata.

Iniwas ko ang tingin sa kanya at umupo sa mesa, staring blankly at the food.

My stomach was growling, ngunit hindi man lamang ako natakam sa pagkain na nasa harap ko. Compared to what was served in the facility where we came from, mas disente ang pagkaing nasa harap ko ngayon, ngunit kahit tingnan man lang iyon ay hindi ko magawa.

Nang lumabas ang gwardiya at iniwan kami ni Kruger, pareho kaming nagpapakiramdaman. Kruger leaned closer and spoke in a whisper.

"Noticed anything suspicious?"

My dull eyes looked at him ngunit hindi ako nagsalita. I'm still so consumed and overwhelmed with all the things that happened.

Tinitigan niya ako nang matagal, para bang binabasa kung ano ang nasa isip ko. Wait, he can't read minds, right?

"They successfully eroded your mind," sabi niya.

Napakunot ang noo ko.

Kruger crossed his arms, a smirk playing on his lips. "It's either you're a good actress o wala ka talagang alam sa mga nangyayari."

I slammed my fist on the table, my frustration boiling over. "Pwede ba, hindi ko na alam ang mga nangyayari! Can't you just be nice to me for once? Mababaliw na ako!"

Tears welled up in my eyes.

Was I crying?

I think so.

I sniffed, sat back down, and buried my face in my hands, sobbing uncontrollably. I felt so helpless, so frustrated. Everything was spiraling out of control, and no matter how much I regretted agreeing to Wolff Bane's idea, I couldn't turn back time. I was stuck, unsure if I would even see the sun tomorrow.

Kruger just let me cry, silently watching me. When I finally calmed down, hindi niya inalis ang tingin sa akin.

"You're feeding into their wants by crying and being vulnerable," he said flatly.

I looked up at him, confusion clouding my face. He continued.

"Don't you think this place has eyes and ears everywhere?" Inilibot niya ang tingin sa paligid. "Our every move here is watched, every conversation is being listened to. That chamber is not meant to isolate us from close contact with the illness; it's to break us down mentally, strip us of resistance, at nang sa ganoon ay maging sunod-sunuran tayo sa gusto ng kung sinuman ang nasa likod nito."

I felt a chill run down my spine dahil sa isiniwalat ni Kruger. It all makes sense. Pero bakit?

Iginala ni Kruger ang tingin sa paligid. Nang mapadako ang tingin niya sa sulok ng silid na gawa sa salamin, tumayo siya at lumapit roon.

"Care to tell us what's going on?" tanong niya sa dingding. I was so confused as to what he was talking to the wall about, ngunit nang akmang kukunin niya ang upuan upang hampasin ang salamin, lumabas ang hologram ng doktor sa paligid.

"Hello, inmate 1101052," bati ng doktor. Unlike the last time he appeared before us, hindi na siya nakasuot ng PPE ngayon. Instead, he was wearing a lab gown at nakasuot ng salamin. I almost dropped my heart when I recognized who it was.

The doctor I saw nang unang beses na natrap ako sa Zone Z.

The same doctor I saw who also happened to work at Bane Lab.

Dr. Lee.

I'm doomed. Ito na ba ang katapusan ko?

"You're trying to make us lose our sanity," nakangising sabi ni Kruger. "This is not about isolation to illness, right?"

"You are as sharp as you were before you became a citizen of Zone Z, inmate 1101052," komento ni Dr. Lee. I'm shaking as I watched their exchange, but Kruger's courage somehow helped me not to pass out any time now.

"Hindi niyo ako mamanipula, Dr. Lee. I told you before, right? Lalabas ako ng Zone Z at papatunayan ko sa'yo na wala akong kasalanan," determinadong wika ni Kruger. Ibig bang sabihin ay kilala niya si Dr. Lee bago pa siya makulong? What was their connection?

"Alright, aaminin kong hindi lamang ito tungkol sa sakit. There was another reason."

Kruger sat silently with a smirk, as if taunting the doctor to reveal what the reason was.

"You two are high-profile criminals, and being isolated in the normal isolation facility would mean your escape," sabi ni Dr. Lee. "Sa tingin ninyo ay maniniwala ang lahat na nagkataong kayong tatlo—Inmate 1101077, Inmate 1101052, at Inmate 1101121—ang nagkataong Patient Zero and mga close contacts? That's more contrived than anything." Nagpalipat-lipat ang tingin niya sa aming dalawa.

Wait, did he just give me a number and say I’m a high-profile criminal?

"Anong ibig mong sabihin?" I couldn’t stop myself from asking.

"Inmate 1101121, just a few days into your detention, and you're already planning to escape?" Dr. Lee asked.

It felt like my brain was about to explode from everything he was saying. First, he gave me an inmate number, then he knew I was new here. If this were under different circumstances, I might have been pleased to prove to Kruger that I wasn’t an intruder, just as he initially assumed.

"A-ano?" I asked, frowning in confusion.

"Feigning innocence, are we?" the doctor replied. "You barely started working at Bane Lab, and you already tried stealing from their special vault?"

My mouth fell open as I remembered what he was talking about—the robbery at Bane Lab that triggered a Code Black. And what was he saying? That I did it?!

Didn’t Wolff say it was their cough syrup he swapped out, and that the one they were working on was the one that got stolen?

I shook my head to clear my thoughts. Hindi iyon ang mahalaga. The real issue at hand was them linking the robbery to me! If anything, I was the one who was innocent! I had an alibi during the time of the crime! Wolff and I were stuck inside the elevator!

My eyewitness is Wolff Bane himself!

Kruger shot me a glance, silently reading the surprise dawning on my face after Dr. Lee’s revelation. Ibig bang sabihin... totoo nga? I’m a real prisoner of Zone Z now?!

So this wasn’t just me breaching this place under Wolff Bane’s command?

What exactly is happening?! Mababaliw na ako sa mga nangyayari.

"And you, inmate 1101052—"

Kruger cut him off. "Inmate 1101052? It's weird hearing you not call me Young Master, Dr. Lee, or should I say, Assistant Lee."

A slight change flickered across the doctor’s face, but it was quickly replaced by a grin. "Who are you again? Kilala lamang kita bilang isang Inmate 1101052."

Magkakilala nga ba sila before Kruger was stripped of his identity? And could it be that he held more power than Dr. Lee? It makes me think about how Zone Z holds so many secrets, identities, and truths that could change the course of events in Sanip.

Dr. Lee crossed his arms and laughed. "No need to be so suspicious. You were in the Cube dahil, gaya ng sabi ko, you are high-profile criminals and were the close contacts of inmate 1101077. His lab results will be out soon, so we're moving you out of the Cube, and he will join you later. Once we ascertain that the rashes he had are not a threat, babalik na kayo sa inyong mga division and carry on with your daily duties."

Without another word, his hologram disappeared. The dining hall was filled with silence once again as Kruger and I exchanged glances. Mukhang marami siyang gustong itanong sa akin, pero hindi niya ginawa. Instead, he urged me to eat my food.

"Eat your food so you can think straight," he said in a lowered voice. "We'll figure out a way to know what exactly is going on."

I had no appetite, ngunit pinilit kong magkalaman ang tiyan. Kruger is right—I have to think straight, and hunger is not helping. The time inside the Cube seriously affected me and my sanity, but I have to remind myself that I was already out of my mind from the moment I agreed to Wolff's plan.

Dr. Lee wasn't lying when he said we wouldn't be returning to the Cube. We were still inside the facility, but now in a larger room. No glass walls, just thick concrete ones. There were chairs, government-issued magazines, and various things to keep us occupied.

When the guard left us, Kruger immediately moved and inspected the surroundings. I silently watched him as he examined every corner, as if looking for something.

"Anong ginagawa mo?" Hindi ko mapigilang tanong.

"Looking for anything, in case they're trying to spy on us."

I sat down and leaned back. "You think they'd use big, obvious devices?"

Natigilan siya. "Good point, but based on my initial assessment, this place is better than the Cube. Inside the Cube, they're watching our every move. Alam nila kung ilang beses tayong kumurap habang nasa loob, they even know the pattern of our breathing and can accurately count our pulses."

"T-that's creepy."

He sat comfortably. "Welcome to modernity." Tiningnan niya ako nang matagal. "Wala akong ibang choice kundi pagkatiwalaan ka. Whether we like it or not, we're stuck together as..." He quoted his hands in the air. "High-profile criminals. Wanna hear my deduction about your identity?"

I crossed my arms and looked away. "We're not supposed to talk about it."

He laughed. "We're high-profile criminals. We're a threat to Sanip. A mere policy can't stop us from doing what we want. We can do anything."

Tiningnan ko siya nang matagal. Honestly, I'm curious about what he deduced about me. Maybe through that, I can learn things about him too.

"Fire away," sagot ko.

"I stand by my initial deduction na hindi ka taga-Zone Z. You're not a detainee. Your body language the first time told me so. And to back up my claim, your reaction to Dr. Lee's words just sealed it. You're given a number and accused of a crime you know you didn't commit."

I was amazed at how he read me through my small movements. Alam kong bawat galaw ko ay maaring makakuha siya ng impormasyon tungkol sa akin kaya kailangan kong maging maingat. Hindi pa ako sigurado kung mapagkakatiwalaan ko ba si Kruger.

Nagpatuloy siya sa pagsasalita. "Also, there were irregularities that I observed along the way. Remember when we were called as the close contacts? Inilabas nila ang mga imahe natin, instead of just calling us through our inmate numbers, like how they usually do. Doon ko napagtantong wala ka pang numero, and so as not to alarm everyone or maybe they were still in the process of investigating you, they released our images instead of numbers. Nang nasa Cube tayo, your bodily responses gave you away as well. Ganoon na lamang ang gulat mo nang mabigyan ka ng inmate number. Your reaction also tells me you know Dr. Lee, or at least this isn’t the first time you’ve seen him. The way your eyes dilated when you recognized him, the way you shook when he mentioned your crime—"

Mabilis akong tumayo. "Hindi ko ginawa ang sinasabi niya!"

"Half of Zone Z's detainees claimed that too," sagot niya sa akin. "So, you stole a chemical from Bane Lab?"

"I told you, hindi ko ginawa iyon!"

Mapait na tumawa si Kruger. "Alam mo ba ang nakakatawa sa Charter of Rights natin? No individual shall be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law, and all citizens shall receive protection as deemed appropriate by the state, provided it serves the greater order. That's bullshit kasi wala namang due process na ginagawa. The Supreme Authority's decisions are final and unquestionable. Protection under the law is granted only to those who demonstrate absolute loyalty to the state and its directives."

It made me realize that the world is really rotten. Ang problemang pasan ko ay isang buhangin lamang sa dalampasigan. And it's so disheartening to know that fact.

I am no hero, and I know I cannot change the world. What was I thinking when I agreed to save Bean?

Bumaling ako kay Kruger. "How about you? You knew Dr. Lee personally?"

"Ever heard of the name Kruger?"

The name does ring a bell, ngunit hindi ko maalala kung saan at ano ang narinig ko tungkol doon kaya umiling na lamang ako bilang sagot.

He sighed and leaned back comfortably. "Of course, only the Glass and Marave are meant to be remembered. No one remembers the second, so they say."

Napakunot ang noo ko. Right, Glass and Marave top the list of the most wealthy and influential families in the whole country. They were always neck and neck with each other... and next in line are the Krugers!

"You're from the family who designed Zone Z!" Hindi makapaniwalang bulalas ko.

"Designed, modified, and improved. Yes."

Nabuhay ang pag-asa sa dibdib ko. "Then you must know a way—" Hindi na niya ako pinatapos.

"No. Zone Z is designed to be foolproof."

"Pero merong paraan! I'm sure mayroong paraan—"

He sighed. "I can escape here if I want to, but what will become of me? Magiging pugante at magtatago? I'd rather rot here and make the wrong right than live freely by escaping and not fighting for what's right."

It hit me. Kruger does not want freedom; he wants reform. Pero hindi ako kagaya niya. I'm not incriminating myself for the sake of the world.

"You're fooling yourself kung sa tingin mo mababago mo ang mundo."

"Who said I want to change the world? Well, technically, yes, I want that, but my lifetime won't be enough. Let's start with Zone Z," nakangising sagot niya.

I will never understand what he's trying to prove. "We're no longer who we used to be, Kruger. Paano mo mababago ang Zone Z kung ganito, isa ka lamang sa mga bilanggo?"

Hindi niya pinansin ang komento ko. "When my father designed the current state of Zone Z, he was getting my opinion. He designed this place as a jail in a kid's imagination. Kids tend to think of the impossible, but my dad made it all possible."

He sounded so proud and sad at the same time. Ayaw kong tanungin kung nasaan na ang tatay niya, because I may be sad too.

"Zone Z isn't just about keeping people inside. It's like Sanip, in a smaller perspective. Likewise, the whole country is just like Zone Z, but bigger."

Agad kong naintindihan ang ibig niyang sabihin. Hindi lamang ang Zone Z ang bilangguan, kundi ang buong bansa, to which I agree. With no intellectual freedom, forced societal conformity, and government control? Sanip itself is a prison.

He sighed, looking so sad at the harsh reality. "Zone Z is a political symbol. Whether we like it or not, this all comes down to politics."

Ah, politics.

Messy and chaotic politics.

I hate it.

Marahil ay napansin niya ang reaksyon ko.

"Ayaw mo sa pulitika?" he asked.

I shrugged. "I... I just think they're too complicated and chaotic."

He looked at me like he was carefully deducing something. "You're one of those meek people."

Meek? Right, because what choice do I have? Wala akong boses, wala akong kapangyarihan.

"Judge me all you want, Kruger. I don't think being meek is that bad. I just want peace."

Kruger crossed his arms, his eyes never leaving mine, as if waiting for me to realize something. "You want peace, yet you let others dictate the world around you. That’s not peace. That’s surrender."

His words hit harder than I expected. "I just don’t want to be part of the chaos."

"And that’s exactly why you’re stuck in it." He leaned forward, his voice dropping. "Kayong mga nananahimik, kayong mga natutulog sa pansitan, kayong mga hinahayaan lamang ang mga bagay-bagay, you are the very reason the powerful get to stay in power. They bank on people like you—too scared to stand up, too eager for comfort at the expense of everything else."

My throat tightened as his words sank in. He wasn’t wrong. By staying quiet, by not fighting back, had I allowed the chaos to consume everything I cared about?

"Peace isn’t about sitting back and hoping things will work out," he continued. "Hindi iyon pananahimik tungkol sa mga bagay na alam mong tama. It’s about fighting for the world you want to live in."

I swallowed hard, the weight of his words pressing down on me.

Was my meekness costing me more than I realized?

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