I stared myself in mirror, winged eyeliner framed my eyes, red painted lips, cheeks tinted pink not because I'm blushing and I was wearing traditional red wedding lehanga. I was not nervous I was scared. Scared for what future beholds for me, Jibran told me not to expect anything from him but don't know why I still have this thing called hope. But, I'm keeping it as low as possible.

"MA'sha'Allah you are looking beautiful." That's what people said when they saw me.
"بارك الله لكما وبارك عليكما وجمع بينكما في خير"
wished my cousin sister.

"She veiled her feelings again."

"جزاك اللهُ خيرًا" .I thanked her

I met Jibran once before our Nikah. He came to my house, we were in a room and Abba was also present. I was nervous wreck but he was calm. Basically he asked me if I am okay with this marriage and I replied a positive answer 'yes'. To it he just gave me a curt nod and left my house with salams and Allah Hafiz.

I barely looked at him, I am happy that he has beard. I always wanted to marry a guy with beard, it's weird that I have a thing for beard.*blushes*

But he didn't give me any vibe of happiness about this marriage. He already told me that he is doing this for his daughter. There was this hollowness which I quit didn't understand, I just shrugged it off.

Here I'm sitting on the bed adorn by flowers. It felt like déjà vu but how I wish it not to be. My finger nails are digging in my knees. The squeak of the door made me realize his presence. I was highly strung, cannot even lift my head.

My heart started to beat frantically by each step he took. I tried to gulped my agitation but it didn't work.

"Assalamualikum" he said in his stern voice.

"Walikumassalam." I replied, more like I whispered. He passed by me and sat on the furthest corner of the bed. We were silent no one tried to talk. I was getting more skittish.

"Huhmmm..." he cleared his through and broke the silence. I flinched by his act. As I turned around I found him laid down on the bed.

Then he suddenly rushed out like it was suffocating for him to stay in this room with me alone. Is fate repeating? A tear rolled down, why am I upset when he already said me not to expect.

"Show me your hands." He said, I skipped a beat. Why? I thought. But little do I know what was about to happen.

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Author's note:

I know, I know. This update is way too late. But please! Spare my pretty little life because I was busy with college work.

I'll try to update faster but no promises though.