TW ; Anxiety, death

    ¤

I am bound by the invisible cuffs it ties me to.

They tell me,

It's all inside your head.
I ask you,

how can the daggers that
tear me apart each day,
ever not exist?

I can smell the constraint in my throat, my stomach a mush full of peeled memories.

Did you see me not breathing?
Gasping for air everywhere,
yet the only place I get it from,
is a two-inch space.

Do I need to be muted forever, for
you to finally hear?
Is it because I don't shed tears,
that I don't get paid heed to?

Empty statistics and scary campuses populate the world,
taking away lives too early,
too cruelly.

And yet,
the world won't get it.
All because it doesn't get fixed with a capsule or surgery.

A slit wrist,
an overdose on a bottle,
a rope around the neck,
a fallen corpse,
a battered body.
Ever wondered why
death felt like a better
button to press?

How can you be so sure?

it's temporary

What? You don't believe me?

it will be okay in few days

Will you listen to a stopped heart at least?

it's all because you don't study hard

Did you ever feel constricted?

you look so happy anyways, what's the issue

Did you ever feel your lungs don't work enough?

you don't know what you're talking about

Have you felt the pain?

When people dismiss the poison growing
for 'lack of bloody sleep'?

you just need rest
those friends of yours
are spoiling you.

Of course.

I'll get some rest.
Maybe they were right.

Resting forever was a better choice.

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If anyone reading this is going through any sort of mental health problems, you need to know - YES THEY ARE VALID. Mental health plays an equally important role in your life as that of physical!

Do NOT hesitate to reach out and ask for help, if not friends or family, THERE ARE helplines and foundations that are committed to helping people out.

These are some foundations that work 24/7 so you could reach out anytime!

+91 730 459 9836 - Domestic helpline for Vandrevala Foundation (India)

+91 730 459 9837 - International helpline for the same.

help@vandrevalafoundation.com

0832-2252525 - Suicide helpline.

YouMatterByCooj@gmail.com