My letters to my brother

will always be hidden
at the bottom of my cupboard.
Dustless,
for I read them

every

single

day.

You were my shield,
my source of grit.
The rock who never broke.

While others laughed
at my obsession with reading
scientific guides,
you would be the only one ready to spend all your money on them.

Would my science fairs ever have the same infectious energy it possessed before,
without you attending them?

How I wish I had called you brother,
the night it all happened.

A crime that doesn't have
an apt remuneration.
Nor any punishment prescribed.
My science models were all
incomplete.

I wish my biology diagram was at least colored.

I know you blame yourself
but it's all okay now.

I didn't know it was my fault,
that the mean-looking boy
you called friend,
wasn't appealing to me.
I didn't know,
I was supposed to adhere to him.

I don't know what hit me, brother,

all my science fantasies
couldn't help me decide,

if it was
hydrochloric

or sulphuric

that touched me first.

It burnt,
burnt
and burnt.

It wasn't your fault,
you picked the wrong friends.
How could you know?
That the ones by your side always,
would dare to pick up

a bottle of acid?

My skin was crawling, brother,
and I know I don't look the same.

The neighbor's point,

the doctors heave.

But it wasn't because of you.
It wasn't because of you.

So tell me, brother.
Why did I find your
feet meeting my face

your body choked of life?

I told you it wasn't your fault.

But a piece of jute
decided that day?

Sympathy and remorse have been
the only emotions I have seen so far.

But I saw hopelessness in yours.
And I think that's what breaks me,

every

single

day.

It's been a long time, brother,
the pain has quietened down.
But the saddest part is,
I didn't just lose a face that day.

I lost my shield too.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

If it was never sold, it would never be thrown.