*Ben POV*
I am pacing my hotel room, fuck what have I done ? And what do I do ? I gave into my most base urges, let my feelings rule me, but I know it is wrong, I am not supposed to have these feelings, Ginny is just about ready to kill me, and I get her, even Tom had looked ready to punch my lights out.
But it is not as easy as just walking away, I close my eyes, I have to face the truth, I am in love with her, against all better judgement and sanity, I have gone and fall in love with India.
I am not stupid though, I know how this will look to the public, it won't look good at all, and I do the only thing I can think to do, I call my puplicist Karon.
"Hey Ben, is everything okay ?" She picks up after the second ring, sounding a bit nervous, knowing that I rarely call if there isn't some kind of issue.
I breathe in deeply, knowing I can trust Karon, but also that this probably will end with me getting yelled at. "No Karon, I have really fucked up here, I need your advice. Do you remember India, my goddaugther ? She visited me last spring".
"Yeah, I remember her, a nice girl. What's with her Ben ?" She asks, when I don't answer, it only takes her half a minute to connect the dots. "Oh shit Ben, no you didn't, please tell me you didn't sleep with her, for Gods sake she is what 18 ?"
"She is 20 Karon, almost 21. And well you want the truth right ?" The groan from the other ends tell me that she is pacing the floor, pulling her hair in frustration right now. "I love her Karon, I truly do".
She huffs and I know she could happily throttle me right now. "Don't talk about love Ben, you can't do this, it would be a publicity nightmare, it could kill your career, not only her age, but the fact that you are her godfather and has known her since she was born".
"I know Karon, I know, I just feel like the world biggest jerk right now, and having to tell her it was just those two ..".Karon cut me off with a squeak. "Two times Ben ? You bloody wanker".
I roll my eyes and continues. "Telling her this is it, will only make me feel worse, like I used her just for that".
"Believe me Ben, it will be kinder to her, what she would get from your fans and the tabloids, it would be far worse, not to talk about how Ginny would react". The last she says make me cringe, she might never forgive me.
I bite my lip, wondering how I have managed to screw this up so badly in such a short time. "Well I kind of already know, she might have walked in on us, she kind of want to kill me, Tom had to physical hold her back".
"Tom ? How does he fit in in all of this ? And of course she wants to kill you, what did you expect ?" She tells me.
I let out a breath. "I don't know, I honestly didn't think I would ever act on my feelings, but she kind of got me drunk enough to forget. Tom is dating Ginny, I think he kind of wanted to punch my lights out".
"She got you drunk, so she is to blame. We can use this to make you look better if this gets out". She says, sounding very hopeful.
I shake my head, quickly checking the text I just got. "We wont Karon, she didn't make me do anything that I hadn't wanted to do for a long time, but I got to go, she just texted me that she wants to talk".
"End it Ben, it is the only sane thing to do, end it before it all goes to hell. Talk to you soon". She says, hanging up.
I quickly text India back, telling her that indeed we need to talk and to come to my hotel, steeling myself, I have to do this, for both of us.

*India POV*
I contacted Ben, telling him we need to talk and he asked me to come to his hotel, I don't really know what it is I want to say to him, I mean I know what I want, I want him, but I just don't know if it is possible.
When I knock on the door, he opens the door, letting me inside, he looks really tense and stressed, and I get a sinking feeling in my stomach.
He looks at me, rubbing his neck with one hand, a move I know means that he is uncomfortable. "I am so sorry India, I should never have given into my desires, it was so very wrong of me, letting you think that there might be more to it. I hope you can forgive me".
"I guess you spoke with Karon right ? So this is it". I try to hold me feelings back, I should have known, should have realised that I can't have him, there are to much pulling us apart.
He nods slowly, looking down on the floor, and I know what is coming. "India, I am sorry, Karon is right, it would only bring trouble, for us both, the publicity would be hell, you mom would kill me and you would end up getting hurt".
"Yeah contrary to now right Ben, when I am not hurt at all, but I get it, you are right, so nothing else to talk about. See you". I have to get away, I won't let him see me cry.
I run out the door, hearing him call out, but I need to get away, to be alone, it feels like my heart has been ripped out and I can't breathe, but at least I have the memories, maybe those can comfort me just a bit.