Wow this is probably the shittiest thing I've ever written on this site, and I feel like I've written about it before but no one is going to see this, also this is like two rants in one, so lets get on with it, I guess.

Anyways, I hate people with talent. I work my ass off to be decent or at par with everyone else and everything I like doing, I have to go that extra mile to even be considered part of the team for the swim team, that extra mile to be adequate in choir, and I have to go that extra mile to be a little above average on my instrument, and like, everyone says I'm getting better but there is no evidence that I have ever made any improvement whatsoever in any of these things. My range is the same for my instrument and vocally, and I improved by all of one second in my free swimming this year. Wow, so great. 

It really pisses me off though, when people say that they aren't talented, that they just have been practicing a lot, but bitch no. I practice every chance I can and I'm not even at par at you, and like I get that being humble is supposed to be a fucking good thing but I hate it. I hate it when people say they're not good at something because they're insulting everyone who has to try twice as hard as them to be able to be half as good. Like who the fuck do you think you are?

And then like, I have one year left, one fucking year, to make it into a good role for the school musical, like I got into chorus this time but no one notices the fucking chorus, and that means I'm average. See the thing about either sucking or being really good is that people notice you, if you're average, no one cares, that's why the chorus usually goes unnoticed. Sorry, not sorry, you can say they don't but you don't remember the chorus of a musical you remember the main characters. 

And I hate being average, I hate it. I don't know how the fuck to get further, how to advance more, and the director keeps pushing me away whenever I ask to work with him so I can get better and like how the fuck am I supposed to know how to get better. I thought I rocked my audition and clearly I only did better than sucking to get in. 

Footloose isn't that cool anyways

i dont care