WILD & WICKED / © yllwjckts
010 ⸻ Fallen Masks

Can you hear me cry out to you?
Words I thought I'd choke on figure out
I'm really not so with you anymore
I'm just a ghost
So I can't hurt you anymore

— "This Is How I Disappear", My Chemical Romance

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .*:☆ﾟ. ───

trigger warning for more in depth discussion of lux's past s/a

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .*:☆ﾟ. ───

It was Fulk's quick thinking that saved Remus's life, according to Madam Pomfrey as she hastily explained to the crowd of twenty that had swarmed into the Hospital Wing. He'd been the only one in the room intelligent enough to understand what was happening — not choking, not coughing, but somehow, he'd consumed hemlock.

Fulk, who had found a bezoar in Slughorn's drawer, and shoved it down Remus's throat just before his heart could stop completely. Hemlock was fast acting, Pomfrey said, taking over the body within minutes. Remus Lupin was lucky to be alive.

"Hemlock?" Lux repeated when the healer had finished her long winded rant, a sensation akin to fist hitting her gut jerking through her. "How could he have—"

"There will be an investigation, I'm sure," she interrupted with the wave of her hand. "That is not my job to do. My job is to tend to my patients, which I cannot do when over a dozen people are inside my office!"

Her tone was harsh enough to get most of the students to leave, filing out of the door as they murmured amongst each other. No doubt rumor would get out by the next morning that Remus had been poisoned in a Slug Club meeting.

"I'm not leaving," James announced with a firm foot slammed on the ground as if marking his territory. Remus was unconscious on the bed, with curtains drawn around him that James couldn't stop glancing at, as though he would emerge any moment. "He's my best mate. I'm not leaving him."

Lux's lips parted to insist the same, but before she could get a word out, a hand was atop her shoulder. "We're wanted in the headmaster's office," Fulk whispered into her ear, just quiet enough as to not be heard by James.

She turned, eyebrows raised and anxiety pooling in her stomach. "He doesn't think we did this, does he?"

"Just come with me," Fulk insisted, and Lux decided it was in her best interest to obey. She could fight Dumbledore, she knew she could, especially with Fulk at her side. Two vampires against one old man had an obvious end in sight, which was the only thing soothing her nerves as they stepped through the hallway and towards Dumbledore's office in silence.

"How do you know the password?" She asked when Fulk had caused the golden eagle statue to move with the words "chocolate frog".

"Dumbledore and I have meetings fairly often," he admitted, chin held high as he scaled the staircase that had formed. "He's a crafty man, that is certain. Knows how to make his alliances, and with whom."

Lux inhaled a breath, watching as Fulk pushed open the door to Dumbledore's office, revealing an array of people. First, Lux spotted Slughorn, nervously wringing his hands together from where he sat.

Then, pacing back and forth on the floor was a man whom she didn't recognize, his skin saggy and hairs flecked with grey despite the youth in his eyes. Just as Lux knew age, she could spot a young soul, and he couldn't have been over fifty. Worked to the bone, no doubt, with restless case of worry she wondered if he ever was able to shake off, or if it even managed to plague his dreams as well.

Dumbledore was seated at his desk, his eyes also etched with worry as he spoke to the pacing man words that Lux couldn't be bothered to pay attention too, more intrigued by the remaining two humans that snagged her attention.

Most curiously, were Lily Evans and Thomas Mulciber, with the former hovering by Dumbledore's desk, and the latter sitting in a chair with his arms folded across his chest and a scowl on his face. Even so, something was deeper in his eyes, a sense of sheer, unrelenting panic. An animal backed into a corner.

"Mr. Ingelger, Miss Erzsebet, thank you for joining us," Dumbledore greeted them with a calm nod, and nudging towards two empty chairs. "Please, take a seat."

Fulk did. Lux did not, finding her heart rate too fast to do anything but stand.

"What's happening?" Lux demanded after a followed silence. "Is this about Remus? Headmaster, I swear, I had nothing—"

Dumbledore held out a hand, cutting her speech off. "I know you had no role in what happened to Mr. Lupin. There's no need to worry, Miss Erzsebet."

She exhaled a breath of relief, but even so, anxiety clung to her, sinking into her skin. "Then why are we here?"

"Is it true that at this so called Slug Club meeting, Mr. Lupin ate your food?"

"Yes," Lux answered, biting down on the side of her cheek.

The nervous man's pacing increased.

Dumbledore raised his eyebrows as Lily shifted her position. "And you did not eat any of it, correct?"

"Correct, but Headmaster, I—"

"—I am not accusing you of anything, Miss Erzsebet," Dumbledore insisted, cutting her off once more. "I am simply proving a theory brought to me by Miss Evans, here."

"She's a liar!" Mulciber snapped, his tone thick with anger. "She's a lying, filthy mudblood—"

"Hey!" Lux cried as the pacing man stopped in his tracks, eyes growing wide at the slur. Slughorn let out a hiccup, and even Fulk inhaled a sharp breath.

"You did it, I saw you!" Lily protested, the only one unaffected by the word. "You put something onto Lux's food when James's glass shattered! I bet you did that too, as a distraction."

"Prove it," Mulciber spat in response.

"How else would hemlock have gotten onto Lux's food? Slughorn checked himself, there was hemlock on her plate and only hers! Why would you do that?"

He opened his mouth, likely to spout more professions of innocence, but Lux cut him off.

"He tried to set me on fire in detention last week."

All heads turned to her. The pacing man let out a cough. Even Mulciber was too shocked to deny this.

"What?" Fulk demanded, an intensity in those icy eyes of his that she'd never seen before.

"We got into a spat," she elaborated, wringing her hands together. "He was upset that I'd gotten him detention in the first place. Set my parchment on fire. It escalated into a duel of sorts. He cast incendio, while aimed at me."

"Only because you punched me!" Mulciber said, rising onto his feet and storming up to her. When he was only inches away from her, his head pivoted towards Dumbledore, a wild anger in his expression. "She's not normal! There's something wrong with her, I swear it! No one, especially not a girl, should be able to break a jaw with a punch!"

"I broke your jaw?" She gaped. She knew she was strong, of course, but never bone breaking. Never tough enough to hurt without probable cause, and at that point, she'd been the aggressor.

(She hated to wonder where that part of her came from. Had it been Philip's molding, or something she'd carved out of herself?)

"Maybe you're just weak as hell, Thomas," Lily called out from behind them, causing Lux to scoff in agreement.

His face contorted, what had once been anger morphing into pure rage. "You think that's funny? You think that's fucking funny, Erzsebet?"

She parted her lips, preparing to say that she did, in fact, find it funny. But with a speed fast enough to rival her own, his hand was thrust upwards, his fist connecting with her jugular as his fingers wrapped around her neck and squeezed.

Lux's eyes bulged. Heart raced. Hands moved to pry his own off of her. Body shook with a mixture of pain and oxygen deprivation — could vampires die from an inability to breathe? Or would the pain last on and on and on, an eternity of gasping for air that she'd never find?

In the distance, something fell over, or maybe that was her mind making up a distraction from the situation at hand. That once again, her life was in the mercy of someone with hands wrapped around her throat. That once again, she was an inch from death, and she could do nothing but look it in the eye as it took her.

She'd had this thought before, the concept of dying from lack of air. If vampires even could. She'd never found out for certain, but feared it anyways. Never had it occurred to her that she'd experience such a thing again, not since Philip was buried in a shallow grave.

Maybe she deserved it. Maybe this was karma, greeting an old friend.

Lux quit her feeble attempts at fighting back.

Her vision was spotting and her ears rang, but it didn't last for long. Thomas Mulciber's restraint around her ability to breathe was gone within moments, the boy thrust backwards and to the floor by a pair of large, shaking hands.

Fulk was already breathing heavy as he made himself visible to Lux, though he hardly looked at her, his attention focused on the groaning Mulciber.

Dumbledore called out something inextinguishable and far too calm for the situation, as Fulk's shoe covered foot collided with the boy's stomach. Again, and again, and again, eliciting cry after cry from the boy. Even as his groans grew more pained, Fulk only increased his assault, his vampire strength coming out in full force.

Lux barely noticed, nor could she hear the shouts coming from Fulk as she focused on the ringing still filling her ears and the ability to breathe returning to her.

Amidst this, Lily had rushed past the two boys, red hair tossed over her shoulder as she reached over and grabbed onto Lux's arm, whispering something into her ear that she couldn't comprehend. Somehow, she found it soothed her racing heart anyways, calmed the whispers in her mind of Philip and death and how much her throat already hurt.

Thomas Mulciber's hands may have left her skin, but his phantom fist was still there, squeezing and squeezing.

Or maybe that was Philip's. She could never tell.

Fulk only stopped his assault when Dumbledore cast an unknown spell, projecting a shield between the pair. The ringing in Lux's ears had died down, and she was able to hear somewhat clearly as the Headmaster announced a simple, "Enough."

The power of Dumbledore's authority got the nervous man to stop pacing once again. At some point, Slughorn must have fallen out of his chair, and was now pulling himself up off of the ground and onto his shaky feet.

"My father will hear about this!" Mulciber spat out as he scampered away from the shield, putting as much distance between him and the fuming professor as he could.

"Your father is next!" Fulk practically roared, slamming a fist into the shield Dumbledore had cast. Mulciber was promptly silent, still on his back with his hands and feet on the ground, pushing himself further and further away until he was backed up against the wall. Skin gone pale, his eyes were wild with shock as they flickered between the other people in the room.

Lily burst into tears.

"I'm sorry," she blubbered when Lux turned to her, confused at the sound of sobbing. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...I didn't mean to provoke him."

"It's not—" Lux began, but stopped when her voice came out hoarse and scratchy. It felt as though sandpaper had been rubbed against her vocal cords, and before she could finish her sentence, Fulk was at her side.

He was shaking.

Fulk, the smoothest, most sly, most aloof and almost apathetic man she'd ever met, was shaking. She'd never seen him so much as stutter in his speech, but his rage had consumed him enough to send tremors through his body.

And when he spoke, it was clear he only just managed to grasp control of his tone, holding a leash around himself even as he struggled for freedom. "I trust Dumbledore will see to Mr. Mulciber's expulsion, if not for the attempted poisoning, but the assault that took place in front of his eyes." His spat out words were not directed at Lux as he spoke, but at the Headmaster, a glimmer in his eye she recognized.

It was a threat.

But soon enough, his gaze was back on hers, and a hand had moved to her shoulder. "I'll be taking my daughter to the Hospital Wing as well. Mr. Lupin, it was a pleasure to meet you." He nodded towards the pacing man, who Lux only just realized must have been Remus's father, summoned to the castle upon news of his son.

"Can I come with?" Lily asked through the tears streaming down her face. It took everything in Lux not to lean in and wipe them away, assure her it wasn't her fault.

But something had a claim to her tongue, keeping her silent. It was as though Philip's ghost was in the room with them, perhaps buried within the body of Mulciber. A possession of the sorts.

Her hands moved up to touch her throat, claw at her skin to confirm there was no hand there other than the phantom fist of Philip.

"I think Lux needs some time alone," Fulk informed Lily with the bow of his head. "You can see her tomorrow. I'm sure she'll be back and better than ever by then."

Lily sniffed loudly, green eyes welling with more tears as she looked at Lux. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Lux nodded.

With a hand on her shoulder, Fulk led Lux out of Dumbledore's office. She didn't need to ask where they were going — she knew he was leading her towards his office, as opposed to the Hospital Wing. Her neck would be better within a day or two without any interference from Pomfrey or any magical medicines, yet even so, deep down she was praying Fulk had a cure for the bruises she knew would be scattered across her skin. She wanted any reminders of what had occurred vanished from her body as fast as they could be.

They entered his office, Fulk shutting the door behind them with a reverberating slam that had the nearby paintings rocking on the walls.

All the hairs on the back of her neck stood up, a she swiftly jolted away from the sound, and thus, him.

He gulped, exhaling a breath as he noticed the anxiety that rushed through her. "Sorry." His eyes flickered towards the door, then hers again, shoulders slumping ever so slightly as he relaxed. "Sorry, I—"

"Why did you do that?" Lux interjected, a cringe running through her body at the sound of her own voice. Fulk did the same, wincing for a brief second — the most he would allow himself, even with his fallen mask.

He was silent for a moment. "I slammed the door because I was pissed off."

She let out a scoff, despite the pain it caused. "You know I'm not referring to the door."

Another silence, in which his icy eyes pierced hers. She did the same, staring back at him and daring him to look away. Pleading with him not to.

"We stick up for our own. That's how we work."

An eyebrow lifted. "We, as in..."

"Vampires," he answered simply, and something in her shattered. "You may not be part of the Coven anymore, Lux, but we're still hunters of a pack. We don't let one member falter."

"I can handle myself," she insisted with her arms crossed over her chest, her shoulders caved in ever so slightly. "You didn't need to step in, nor beat Mulciber bloody after the fact."

"You weren't doing anything to stop it!" Fulk argued, eyes narrowing in on her. "Was I supposed to sit there and let it happen?"

"Yes! I could've fought back on my own."

Just say it. Please. Just say you care.

He barked a laugh, and any hopes died as they bloomed within her. "You never fight back! You were going to die if he'd kept going."

"I can handle myself! Need I remind you that I killed Philip—"

"—You let Philip rape you for three hundred years, Lux! That's not fighting back! That's cowardice. Submissive, pathetic cowardice, and it'll get you killed someday."

He'd have been better off slapping her. He'd have been better off shoving a stake into her heart.

If he regretted his words, he showed no sign of it, chest still heaving as he breathed heavily. For a moment, she waited, searching him for an apology somewhere.

He gave none, not in words or expression.

She thought about screaming at him, at hitting him, at making him feel as hurt as she felt. A dagger, shoved deep into her chest and twisted about until all she could feel was the blood seeping out from her flesh.

Who was wielding the knife, she wondered? Fulk, or Philip? Or had it been her own hand?

Lux was out the door before she could even begin to process what he'd just said, slamming it behind her even as she heard him call her name.

Down the halls she stormed, her footsteps echoing off the walls as she directed herself not towards her dorm, no, she didn't think she could face looking Lily in the eye quite yet. Instead, she turned the corner and rushed back into the Hospital Wing, heart racing as she did.

It was odd, she lamented as she pushed through the doors. Fulk was always her save haven, her eye in the storm that was threats like Remus and Snape and Mulciber, but now...she couldn't get far enough away from him. Instead, she pushed herself right into the belly of the beast.

Everything hurt, but she ignored the pain, deeming it something she could deal with at a later date. Now, she just needed to put as much space in between her and Fulk as possible.

Remus's father was in the Hospital Wing now, seated at a chair next to Remus, who was sound asleep. The curtain that Pomfrey had drawn around him had been removed, and other than the three, the room was vacant. Pomfrey, it seemed, had gone to sleep as well.

Mr. Lupin glanced upwards at her arrival, then frowned. "Should you not be with your father?"

"I have no need to be." Her voice was kept low as she responded, careful not to trigger the dull pain in her throat. With her gaze shifting between him and the boy in the bed, she gulped spilling out something she could not tell the truth of. "I wanted to check on Remus. He's...he's going to be okay, right?"

"He is," Mr. Lupin answered with a grave nod that seemed to suggest the opposite. "Madam Pomfrey is taking good care of him. He should be awake tomorrow."

"Good." She forced a wavering smile.

"Would you like to sit down?" He nudged towards the chair on the other side of Remus. "You're not supposed to," he admitted as she stepped closer to accept, and with a sheepish sort of grin, continued, "Madam Pomfrey sent James Potter away, but what she doesn't know won't hurt her."

Lux nodded with understanding as she took a seat, shifting her position in the uncomfortable chair.

"Are you...are you okay?" Mr. Lupin asked her after a pause between them, his voice hushed. "With that boy, and what he did to you—"

"I'm fine," she interjected before he could elaborate on what had happened, suddenly feeling far too exposed. It felt like her neck was suddenly an area that shouldn't be shown off, and she desired to wear something to cover it.

"I'm glad to hear that," Mr. Lupin said, but it was evident he didn't believe her. "That kid will get expelled. I'm sure of it. He's not been allowed outside of Dumbledore's office. It's up in the air right now if he truly did put that hemlock in your food, but Dumbledore can't deny he tried to kill you right in front of him."

She gave him an absentminded nod, eyes shifting towards Remus. While awake he took precedence in her mind as a predator, asleep, he seemed peaceful. Harmless. Just a boy with scars he'd yet to outgrow.

"Forgive me," Mr. Lupin cleared his throat, scratching the back of his neck. "But...are you and Remus together, then?"

"Together?" She repeated, then paled when she understood the implication. "Oh, no, we're not. I just needed a date for this Slug Club thing, and he was the first person that came to mind. He and I are just..." Friends? Rivals? Uneasy allies? She hadn't a clue where to begin with what she and Remus Lupin were. "Classmates."

"Classmates," he repeated, and she nodded slowly. "I see. Well, I'm sorry we had to meet under such unfortunate circumstances. I'm Lyall, by the way."

"Lux." She reached over Remus's bed and accepted the hand he'd outstretched for him to shake.

It was not long after their conversation died down that Lyall Lupin fell asleep in his chair, the gentle sounds of his snores emitting from his parted lips. Even in his dreams, he did not appear to at peace, the occasional grunt or odd noise coming out from him, signaling a nightmare that Lux wondered about waking him from.

She decided not to, instead shifting in her chair as she struggled to find a way to relax. Even when she found a half decent position, closing her eyes was of no comfort to her.

Instead, all she could focus on as she attempted to find sleep herself was the voice of Fulk, ringing in the back of her mind.

Coward.

Maybe he was right. She had been one, allowing Philip to use her like a marionette on strings for whatever it was he desired from her. It went beyond sex, the acts he'd forced her to commit. Lux had never been the main executioner of the Coven, that job had been Torquatus's, but there'd been enough times where his words would result in her teeth in someone's neck.

She couldn't recall if she'd wanted to fulfill those requests.

They'd go to bars at nights, find their victims, bring them into alleys and surround them. There'd never been hope for their survival, and Lux so often gave the final blow.

She'd never fought against it, the Coven and their cruelty out of fear it would be turned onto her. She'd never told him no. Never even tried. Just how she'd let him worm his way underneath her skin, keeping any protests at bay.

"You let Philip rape you for three hundred years, Lux!"

(Was it rape, if she'd never said no?)

Those scars burned in a way that reminded her they'd been burning this whole time, an inferno she'd gone about ignoring.

"Lux?"

She jolted upwards, eyes shooting open as she shot towards the source of the noise. Remus was staring up at her through groggy eyes, shoving his blankets down as he attempted to sit up.

She didn't stop up, allowing him to wince and groan as he leveled himself with her. "What happened?" He asked, wincing again as a pain shot through him. "What—are you crying?"

"What?" Lux demanded, a hand rushing to her face to find hot tears staining her cheeks. She wiped them away as fast as she could, her breath fast and shallow as she did. "No, no, I'm fine. You were poisoned," she spat out before he could press further.

Even as she spoke, her cheeks were flaming with embarrassment. Good Merlin, when was the last time she'd cried?

His eyes grew large. "What?"

"Mulciber put hemlock into the food of mine you ate, when he cast a spell to shatter James's glass. A distraction, it was meant to be. He'll be expelled, so you needn't worry."

For a long moment, there was silence. Then, he asked, voice soft, "You didn't eat any of it, did you?"

"No," she answered simply, ignoring the way his concern made her mind go fuzzy.

"Then what happened to your voice? You sound awful."

Despite the tightness in her chest, she found herself rolling her eyes and a gentle laugh escaping her. "Speak for yourself. You sound like you've been run over by a Hippogriff."

It was his turn to laugh, and that tight knot loosened ever so slightly.

Next to him, Lyall let out a loud snore.

"He's been here all night," Lux said without prompting when Remus turned to look at him.

She watched as his lips curved upwards in the smallest of motions.

"Where's Professor Ingelger?"

She shrugged, ignoring the gut punch that was his name being spoken, as it slammed into her. "Asleep, I presume."

"Shouldn't you be asleep as well?"

"I'm not tired."

He exhaled a breath. "You were acting odd at dinner. Giving each other strange looks throughout the entire thing. Did something happen?"

"Is this an interrogation?"

"I'm just trying to be nice," he said a bit too fast, frowning at her words. "I...we got off to the wrong start. Wouldn't you say?"

"Since when do you care?"

"Truthfully?" He lifted an eyebrow, and she nodded for him to continue. "Sirius told me I had to be nice to you at that Slug Club thing, or he won't speak to me for two weeks."

This time, she couldn't contain the grin that crept across her lips, a playful thing that had her nearly forgetting entirely about her argument with Fulk in the first place. "Two weeks? How specific."

"He knows he can't go any longer than that. He'd go mad without me."

Under her breath, she laughed again.

"It wasn't that bad," Remus admitted, shifting his position.

"The Slug Club?" She raised her eyebrows. "Need I remind you that you got poisoned? I don't know how it could've been any worse, actually."

"Not the Slug Club. Being nice to you."

Something snagged her tongue, catching onto it and refusing to let go, resulting in a long silence between the pair.

Minutes later, the sound of snoring filled the room once more — signaling that Remus had drifted back off into his slumber.

As his consciousness faded, so did the lightness within her, her mind reverting to her initial anxious, angry, hurt mood. The thought of her bed was flooding her brain as well, but she wasn't in a state where she could walk through those halls without fearing her own shadow. Wasn't in a state where she could face Lily, and potentially have to discuss Mulciber and his hand on her windpipe.

She too drifted off to sleep, the sounds of the snores her only comfort, and when she dreamed, she dreamed of how those scars splashed across her back came to be.

September 15th, 1977 ✦ Hogwarts

Lux was jolted awake when the doors to the Hospital Wing screamed as their hinges were assaulted. Her eyes shot open just in time to witness three boys rushing in as fast as they could, settling onto Remus's bed.

He'd woken up in the chaos too, his dreary expression growing into a bright grin as he made contact with the three other Marauders.

"Moony! You're alive!" Sirius exclaimed, throwing himself atop the bed and consuming Remus in a massive embrace. "Pomfrey wouldn't let us see you all night! We thought you were dead!"

"No we didn't," Peter countered from his position behind James, peeking around to observe the scene. Evident from the stuffiness in his voice, he was still sick, rubbing his red nose with the sleeve of his robe.

"I'm fine, Sirius, really, you can let go," Remus wheezed as the embrace slowly but surely deflated his lungs.

Sirius did, though it seemed to cause him great emotional pain, letting out a loud whine as he released him.

Lyall, too, woke up, and met Lux's eye for a brief moment as he silently grinned at the scene before him.

"Bloody hell, we were so worried about you," James said, shoving Sirius to the side to pat Remus on the shoulder. In his arms, he held something Lux didn't quite recognize the use for, making him unable to hug his friend. "Glad you're alright, mate."

"What's she doing here?" Peter jammed a thumb in Lux's direction, where she'd been sitting and watching the scene observe before her with an uneasy amusement.

"Sorry," Lux apologized as she rose to her wobbly feet, still unsteady as her brain struggled to fully leave the realm of dreams.

"No, don't go!" Sirius exclaimed, rushing around the bed to meet her. Grabbing onto her hands, he paid no mind to her flinch as he pressed, "You were there, weren't you? Right next to him?"

She nodded, resisting the urge to pull her hands out of his grip.

His lips parted as he prepared to say something, but his eyes got snagged by the bruises she imagined currently decorated her skin. "What happened to your neck?"

"Nothing."

"Lily said something about Mulciber," James interjected with a frown. "We were a bit too preoccupied to listen to her though."

"Did Mulciber do this?" Sirius demanded.

"Who else would've?" Remus asked before Lux could get a word in. "He tried to poison her, why wouldn't he strangle her on top of that? That poison was intended for her, wasn't it?"

"It was," James said with a nod. "According to Lily, anyways. She was quite hysterical though, couldn't tell much of what she was saying..." His head spun to face her. "Lux, you should go talk to her."

"She shouldn't be talking at all!" Sirius argued, gesturing wildly at her. "Look at the state of her throat! It has to hurt like hell to talk, and you heard her voice."

"It does sound pretty bad," Peter admitted with a cringe.

She shot him a glare.

"Seriously, Luxie, what happened?" Sirius demanded, his hands now moving to her shoulders.

"Thomas Mulciber will be expelled, and no one will ever be hurt by him again," Lyall spoke for the first time, giving Lux a feeble smile as he did. "That's all anyone needs to know, as far as I'm concerned."

She gave him a nod as a silent thanks.

"James was right," she began, cringing again at the sound of her voice. "I need to go speak to Lily. Feel better soon, Remus."

Sirius called out to her, insisting something about wanting to play music they'd brought for Remus, but just like with Fulk, she didn't turn around. She didn't so much as falter in her steps.