WILD & WICKED / © yllwjckts
006 ⸻ Hide and Seek

Don't you dare seduce me
I can see all your tricks
I'm gonna take away
All the spotlight from you
It's the price for your actions
Yeah I'm bad, curse me
But I'm going to do
Whatever I like

— "Devil", CLC (English Translation)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .*:☆ﾟ. ───

September 4th, 1977 ✦ Hogwarts

Lily Evans had to have been the most beautiful girl that Lux had ever met, and she'd met some stunning women throughout her eternal life. Back in the Coven, Adelais, Mathilde and Euphraxia had all been gorgeous, despite their curse to never see their own reflection. They had their own unique distinguishing features that separated themselves from each other, making it impossible to mix them up. And of course, there had been the victims too, the beautiful women from all sorts of backgrounds that spent their time partying away in the British nightlife. Lux lured them in with kind words and peasantries and promises of friendship, only to suck their life out through the veins in their neck.

There was something about Lily Evans that stood above them all. Something Lux didn't deserve.

Because Lily was kind, and Lux was a hypocrite. She was the type of person who tore out the necks of loved ones and feasted on their bloody corpses, then cried when it happened to her. Elias, she'd had it coming. She'd done the same to faceless strangers, why should she have faulted Philip for doing the same?

(Maybe it had something to do with the forty lashings riddled on her back like a poorly kept tally marker).

But even so, that didn't make her own actions from her life in the Coven any less deplorable. More so, perhaps, that she only saw the cruelty in it when they were turned back onto her.

Selfish. That was what she was, she determined as she mulled over the topic in her mind, nails digging into the parchment her hand rested atop.

"Be careful with that. You'll rip it," Remus snapped from next to her, jerking her out of her thoughts. A place she decides was equally as unpleasant as her company, the boy she was now forced to sit by as they mulled over their essay one final time before turning it in at the end of class.

She silently removed her hand from the paper, setting it instead on the wooden desk and ignoring the sound of her heart pounding in her ribcage. Even so, she couldn't restrain her heart no more than she could hold back herself from looking at him. It was Pandora's box, something about him grabbed her attention and refused to let go, much like Lily had done.

For a moment, if she glanced at Remus from the corner of her eye, she could push out the fear that he caused her by simply being, and find the ability to see him for what he was. Even through her blurred vision, it was more than clear; Remus Lupin was just a boy with scars too large for his barely lived out life, who had suffered in a way she had no desire to discover.

"Why are you looking at me?" He snapped, jerking her once again out of her thoughts.

"I'm not," she said swiftly, lowering her head.

"You were," Remus insisted. "Why?"

"I have eyes," she eventually settled on, straightening her posture as she spoke. Any dismissals of danger returned at once, alarm bells ringing in her mind as she shifted so she was seated as far away from the boy as she possibly could get. "Am I not allowed to use them?"

That seemed to shut him up.

Fulk dismissed the class moments later, but Lux hovered behind with a select other few students to turn their essays in. She waited for the room to empty itself out before approaching Fulk's desk, and placing the essay atop the pile of papers scaling up his desk.

"I see you and Mr. Lupin came to a conclusion," he smirked, eyeing the paper. "Which did you settle on, then? Vampires or werewolves as the bearer of power?"

"Vampires," she responded with an accomplished grin sliding across her face.

"I'm surprised Remus gave in. He seems like the type who plays to win."

She glanced behind her, confirming no one was nearby, before responding, "So are we, Fulk. So are we."

Lux turned around, preparing herself to leave the classroom, but before she could take so much as a step away from his desk, Fulk spoke. "You seemed...distracted, in class today. Did you and that Evans girl have a fight?"

Her brow furrowed, as she moved to face him once again. "Why would Lily and I have had a fight?"

"I saw her speaking to you at your desk before class began. You barely looked at her."

"Why would I?"

"You care for her," Fulk insisted, and when her lips parted to protest this, he pressed further, "You think I can't read you, after twenty years? My dear, I know you better than I know the back of my hand."

"I've known her for a week," she insisted, gritting her teeth and clenching her fists so hard that her nails dug little crescents into her pale skin. "Why would I give a damn about her?"

"Because she's pretty, and gives you attention, and you like it," he said as though it was that simple, lifting his shoulders in a shrug as he did. "Spending twenty years away from anyone other than myself ought to have been as isolating to you as it was to me."

For a long moment, she was silent. Fulk was right, of course he was fucking right. When had there been a day within their twenty years as partners in crime was he unable to read her? Sometimes it felt as though he knew her better than she knew herself, that his ability to psychoanalyze her was almost a superpower of sorts.

"I have you," Lux settled on with a deep breath. "I have no need for other friends."

"When did I say anything about friendship?"

Her mouth went dry, heart seizing in a horrible, burning sensation. "I...I don't care for Lily Evans, Fulk, as a friend or as something else. I'm not...like that. Besides, you said it yourself, caring is nothing but a weakness, and I am not weak."

The corners of his lips turned upwards. "I wouldn't dare suggest you are."

"Then why imply I have...feelings, for Lily?" She demanded, spitting out the word feelings like a curse that had tainted her tongue for far too long. "Like I said, I don't...I'm not...I don't."

"I just want you to be honest with me."

"I've never been anything but."

He shook his head. "No, you say what you think I want to hear, and what you yourself want to believe. That isn't honesty."

She shook her head, letting out a breathy laugh despite the sudden pain in her chest. It felt as if he'd just stabbed her, ripped out the knife, and then left her for dead. "I have to go to class."

While she expected him to protest, a strange part of her was let down when he didn't, an ache in her chest that didn't resolve until Fulk was completely out of her vision, and she was instead in Slughorn's class. Even then, the only thing distracting her was the amusement she got out of the middle aged professor. Slughorn was a man whom age had not treated with kindness. The man was about as massive as they came both in weight and stature, and his mustache looked as though a massive worm had crawled over his top lip and made a home there.

Lux was one of four Gryffindors taking the class, with the others being Peter, Marlene and Lily. Her heart sank as the latter rushed through the door, clutching her books to her chest, and sighed with relief when she realized she wasn't late as she must have presumed.

"Lux," Lily approached her seat, eyeing it with apprehension. Like Fulk, she must have noticed how she'd been ignoring the redhead like the plague. "Can I sit here?"

She nodded, not looking up. Lily exhaled a breath as she sat down, and out of the corner of her eye, Lux could see her grinning as though she'd won a medal. She wasn't sure what to make of it, and she considered tearing her hair out as she mulled over the topic.

Lily and her couldn't be friends, not with Fulk's words lingering in her ear, crawling around in her brain and making a home there. He was right, he was always right, and the knowledge of that ached like nothing before.

"Lux," Lily said her name once more, and this time, she couldn't help but glance upwards and meet her gaze. The moment she did, her mouth went dry. "Are you alright? You've been acting odd all day."

"Fine," she dismissed with a quick nod, averting her attention from Lily and back to picking at her nails.

Moments later, Slughorn greeted the class with a warm welcome.

"Today, I will be putting you into pairs, and having you attempt to brew Veritaserum, a very powerful truth potion," Slughorn explained as he paced around the room. "I've created the pairs myself with the intention to create a nice balance, so everything is fair. Miss Evans, you're with Miss McKinnon."

Lux expected Lily to be excited, but instead, she flashed her a sad smile, as though disappointed with her partner.

"Mr. Pettigrew, you're with Mr. Mulciber."

Peter let out an odd sort of squeak, but it was the other boy that drew Lux's attention further. Near the back of a room, next to the greasy haired boy whose name she couldn't recall, sat a kid who seemed to have been summoned with the dictionary definition of menacing.

"Poor Peter," Lily leaned in and whispered. "Mulciber's a right arsehole — nearly got himself expelled a few years back for something he did to Mary. He's not allowed in any of her classes now, at least."

Lux's eyes widened. "What did he to do Mary?"

Lily's lips parted, but before she could get a word out, Slughorn was announcing another name.

"Miss Erzsebet, you're with Mr. Snape."

Severus Snape, right, that was the name of the greasy haired boy seated by Mulciber. His dark eyes flickered upwards to meet Lux's stare, frowning when they made eye contact. Something jolted within her the moment his gaze darkened, a stake buried in her gut as her heartbeat sped up to an astronomical rate. The only thing that set this sensation apart from every time Remus looked at her the wrong way was the sense of doubt in her mind — despite everything, Remus was harmless, she was well aware of it, and thus was able to talk herself down.

The same could not be said for Severus Snape. Every inch of him radiated intent as he rose from his seat without prompting, and walked over to where she and Lily sat. Though as she observed him closer, that dark gaze he'd worn like a mask had lifted, and his gaze had moved towards Lily instead.

Lily, who looked as though she'd rather be anywhere else in the world, as opposed to in the general vicinity of Snape. Something had happened between the two, that was as clear as day. Something that made Lily feel uneasy. Unsafe, even.

Lux rose to her feet without prompting, instincts causing her to push herself in front of Lily. A shield, of sorts. "Snape. Hello," she greeted, concealing Lily with her own body.

Snape frowned, his confusion evident. Running a hand through his greasy hair, he bit down on his lip, before a glare fixed onto his expression the moment he realized Lux's movements had been intentional.

But he kept silent, for some reason opting out of arguing with or insulting her. Instead, after a long pause, he simply jerked his chin in a motion for her to follow him, which she did, sending a final look back at Lily as they parted ways.

Mulciber was already busy tormenting Peter at his own table when they returned, the poor boy looking downright miserable as the menace began tugging on his ear, then laughing loudly when Peter let out a squeak.

"Don't mind them," Snape commanded, following her gaze, but it was too late. Slughorn was too busy being a useless sack of bones to notice what was happening right in front of their eyes, so she took it upon herself.

Her mind had been swimming in thoughts for the entire day of shame, of self hatred and pity and other ridiculous notions that she shouldn't care about, just as she shouldn't care about Lily or Peter. But she did. And maybe, a tiny part of her rationalized with her, if she did this, she'd be slightly more worthy of Lily and Sirius and any other good thing that came her way.

"Leave him alone, arsehole," she demanded as she stepped up to the pair, where Mulciber still had a death grip on Peter's ear.

"Who the fuck are you?" Mulciber spat as he let go of Peter's ear, eying her up and down with a hungry look that didn't match the anger in his tone. No, the bite within his voice was something Lux was all to familiar with, that had every nerve of hers suddenly on edge.

"She's no one," Snape interjected for her, grabbing onto her wrist in an attempt to pull her away.

"Don't fucking touch me!" She yelped, yanking herself out of his grip and stumbling over her own two feet in the process. Peter was only just able to catch her by her other arm before she toppled onto the ground, and through her flaming red cheeks, she managed to muster a small smile at him.

"What's going on here?" Slughorn, who had finished reading off the rest of the names, stepped up to the group of four as fast as his wobbly legs would take him. "How can you possibly be fighting? We've not even started the lesson yet!" His eyes narrowed in on Mulciber. "How did I know it would be you causing trouble yet again, Mr. Mulciber?"

To his credit, the boy stood his ground, his chin held up high. "She started it, actually," he jerked his chin towards Lux, who bared her teeth in response. "The new girl butted herself into my business, shouting for no good reason."

"He was being an arse," Lux insisted.

"He pulled on my ear!" Peter scrambled to back her up, rubbing his flaming red ear with indigence as he spoke.

"Miss Erzsebet, I understand you're new, but we cannot have such vulgar language used in my classroom."

Typically Lux would remain silent after being scolded for a misuse of words, but Lux was no longer in a typical situation. What could Slughorn possibly be able to do to her? She feared this man about as much as she feared the whining Peter Pettigrew, and she refused to let someone like him hold the reins on her lips.

"Arse is hardly vulgar," she pushed.

"Detention, then," Slughorn sighed, and she parted her lips to argue, but he turned to Mulciber before she could. "Both of you. Tomorrow, during dinner."

Any sense of justice was soothed within her as he said this — if she was going down, at least this jerk was going down with her. With one final look at Peter, confirming he was alright, she walked back over to the table Snape had been seated on, pulling out the stool and sitting atop it.

"You shouldn't have done that," Snape glared at her through those dark eyes of his.

She lifted an eyebrow, resting her elbow atop the table. "Your friend was bullying someone. Why should I not have intervened?"

While she expected him to bring up the pathetic detention she'd been given, he didn't. Instead, his voice lowered. "You're meddling in things you don't understand. You should stay out, if you know what's good for you."

"What gives you that impression?"

He eyed her up and down, carefully considering his next few words. But whatever it was he wished to say, Snape never did, as he bit down on his lip and instead went to gather the ingredients needed for their potion without a sound.

When he returned, the pair opened their individual textbooks, not bothering to speak to each other unless determining they needed to. Other than the occasional "pass me that," and "chop this up," and "don't stir that fast," their communication was stagnant.

Lux was grateful for this. Something about Snape was so deeply wrong, in a way she couldn't begin to understand. If Mulciber's awful grin had reminded her of Philip, then Snape reminded her of Adelais, someone just as evil and with more will to carry out their brutalities.

Even if her extreme thoughts were based off of the aura that radiated from him, just like Remus. She knew this, but cared little in dismissing them, not anymore. Not if it kept her safe from whatever it was Mucliber had done to Mary MacDonald.

"Done," Snape said as he added the final bit of rat's tail to the veriteserum. There was no need for stirring, the potion was rendered complete as she watched the tail seemingly melt within the liquid, the crimson red rapidly absorbing as it became the clear shade the rest of the potion was.

Glancing around, Lux's eyes instinctively went to examine Lily, and see how she faired with Marlene. They weren't done with theirs yet, their potion somehow a bright pink shade as Marlene vigorously stirred it and Lily studied the textbook to see what had gone wrong.

Then, her gaze flickered over to Peter and Mulciber, with the former doing all the work for the latter. Her stomach tightened at the sight, but she figured it wasn't a big deal. At least he wasn't physically assaulting the boy as he'd been doing earlier.

"We have half an hour left of class," Snape said without prompting, his voice low and words spoken at a snail's pace.

"Brilliant," she shrugged.

For a moment, he was silent. And then, just under his breath, Snape said, "You shouldn't provoke Thomas."

"Thomas?" Lux frowned.

"Mulciber. Thomas Mulciber."

She let out a soft laugh, rolling her eyes. "I think I'll do as I please, Snape. I don't particularly care about your input."

She expected a lot of reactions from him, but certainly not a crafty smile sliding onto his lips, that made her stomach sink. "And you'll pay dearly for that."

While she wished otherwise, she suspected that perhaps Snape was right.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .*:☆ﾟ. ───

"Are you alright?"

Lux frowned as she heard Lily's voice echo from behind her, directed towards the vampire. She'd just stumbled out of Slughorn's classroom, having received the highest marks in the class for their expertly brewed veritserum. Though she hated to admit it, that was likely due to Snape's expertise at the subject.

"You should be asking Peter that question, not me. It was his ear Mulciber was tugging at, not my own," she said, dodging the question as she turned the corner in the halls, directing herself towards the library for her free period.

"You're brave," Lily commented, struggling to match her pace. "Not many people have the guts to stand up to Thomas. He's a right bully, and a complete creep. You out to be careful around him, Lux."

She couldn't help but roll her eyes, even as her stomach churned at the idea of what Mulciber might get up to. If he was even a tenth as mad and powerful as Philip had been... "I'll be fine. I know my way around bullies. Mulciber is nothing."

"He's been picking on Peter for ages. It's about time someone told him to stop," Lily continued. "Where are you off to, anyways? The Great Hall is the other way."

"I'm not hungry. I'm going to the library to get some studying done."

Lily's brow furrowed together. "How can you possibly not be hungry? You didn't eat breakfast either — Sirius told me."

"Why are you speaking to Sirius Black about my meal habits?"

"Because I'm worried about you," she confessed, throat bobbing as she gulped. "Because you're my friend, and truthfully, I haven't seen you eat a thing since you've gotten here. Do you not eat at all?"

"I eat," Lux insisted, a bite in her tone despite her insides feeling odd. She'd hoped that to everyone, her lack of eating, and thus, her identity, would go unnoticed. But something about Lily being aware of it made her feel a bit dizzy. "Don't be silly. That's a stupid question. If I didn't eat, I'd be dead. Honestly, don't be a fool."

She flinched. "Don't be mean, I'm just worried about you."

"I never asked for your concern."

Please be concerned.

Lily's jaw shifted. "Fine, then I won't be concerned."

"Fine."

"Fine."

When Lily walked away, Lux couldn't help but watch as she did, heart aching as she turned the corner and disappeared out of view.

Taking a deep breath, she began her trek up the stairs and into the library, sitting down at an otherwise empty table and opening her History of Magic textbook. The goal had been to finish off her essay before class that evening, but she was distracted from it the moment someone took a seat across from her.

"Hello, Luxie," Sirius greeted with a bright grin.

She responded with a scowl, cutting right to the chase. "I've heard you've been gossiping about my eating habits."

If he was embarrassed, he didn't show it. Instead, he shrugged, his smile not dimming as he did. "Evans asked me if you'd eaten earlier, and I told her the truth. I didn't see you eat a thing at breakfast today."

"You pay an awful lot of attention to me, then."

"Why wouldn't I?"

She remained silent, biting on her lip.

"If you have...eating issues," Sirius began, voice low as he leaned in, any humor on his face dying down. "There are people you can see for that. You can get help, if you need it."

"I don't have eating issues," Lux insisted, and when he gave her an unconvinced look, she continued, "I just wasn't hungry. I'm serious."

"No, I'm Sirius."

"Oh my God," she groaned, loud enough that a shush was earned from Madam Pince. "Sirius, I'm fine. Really, I am. You and Lily can stop whatever it is you're doing."

His lips parted, but before he could get a word of his own out, his eyes grew wide. Before Lux knew what was happening, the boy was ducked beneath the table, whispering a pathetic "hide me" out as he slid under the wooden slab.

"What are you doing?" She cried out.

"Quiet!" Madam Pince demanded in response. "I'll kick both of you out now!"

"Both of you?" A boy questioned, his voice high and haughty as he sauntered up to the table from where he had been lingering within the shelves. "Am I missing something, or is there only one person here?"

"Sirius Black is down there." Lux jabbed her finger towards the table.

"Is he?" The boy asked, eyebrows lifted high enough to reveal dazzling blue eyes. He was quite handsome, Lux noticed as she observed him, if not a bit overdone. Between perfectly curled blonde hair and what she was convinced was blush lightly dabbed onto his rosy cheeks, it was clear he put more effort into his appearance than necessary, turning his attractiveness from a higher rate to a lower.

"No," Sirius called out from underneath the table.

"This is your last warning!" Madam Pince was louder than they were at this point, shooting daggers from behind her thin, silver glasses.

"Sorry!" Sirius called back, followed by a loud bang as he seemingly hit his head on the table. He emerged moments later, rising onto his feet and rubbing his head with his hand as he winced. "Bloody hell. Tables, yeah?"

Lux's eyes rolled again, but she wasn't nearly as put off by this odd behavior as the mysterious, high strung boy was.

"You weren't hiding from me, were you, Sirius?" He pouted, lip curved downwards in mock hurt.

"Hiding?" He let out a high pitched laugh, scratching the back of his neck. "Why would you think I was hiding? Hiding, really? I'd never hide! Especially not from you, stranger." He nudged his elbow at the boy, though he was too far away to make contact with him, so it looked as though he was just thrusting into the air like a duck.

"It's a good thing we've run into each other, isn't it? I was wondering when I could get my jacket returned to me," the boy continued, stiffening his posture. "It's of great value, and I'd like it back. Quirinus would appreciate it as a gift instead, I'm sure."

"Jacket, jacket, jacket..." Sirius repeated, eyes wide as he thought hard, scrambling for a response. His eyes lit up. "Right! Your jacket! Er...I'll look into it."

"Brilliant." The boy flashed him a bright smile, revealing shiny white teeth that seemed to reflect light off of them. "Nice seeing you. And meeting you, of course," he glanced towards Lux for a brief moment, nose scrunched up like he didn't quite mean it, before stalking away.

Sirius exhaled a breath of relief, slumping back down into his chair. Lux did the same, sitting down while unsure if she was supposed to laugh or be upset from that bizarre interaction.

Instead, she decided questioning Sirius would be the best way to figure out what the hell had just happened. Since when did Sirius Black get flustered, and over someone even more posh than he was, no less?

"What was that about?" She crossed her arms over her chest the moment the strange boy was out of earshot.

"Nothing," Sirius said a little too fast.

Her eyes narrowed.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Fine, fine. That was Gilderoy Lockhart."

"That name means nothing to me."

"You've never heard of—oh, never mind. He was in a magazine or two over the past few years for having a really nice smile. Got pretty famous for it."

"I don't read magazines."

"Course you don't. You're too cool and mysterious for magazines with hot men on the cover."

While part of Lux wanted to refute this — she would read magazines if she had the opportunity to, she kept quiet on the subject. It would only lead to questions she couldn't answer, so instead, she asked, "Why do you have his jacket?"

"We went out a few times," Sirius admitted, as if this fact caused him great embarrassment. "I know, I know, it's bad. But he was cute, and I was desperate."

Her brow furrowed together. "Went out...as in...you were a couple?"

He shrugged. "You could say that, yeah. Except he never wanted to call it anything serious. Didn't want me to tie him down, you see. But he has no problem calling that Quirrell kid his boyfriend, so maybe it was against me specifically."

"Boyfriend," she repeated, more to herself than to Sirius. "So you're..."

"I don't like to label things." He shrugged as her question trailed off. "I fancied Mary MacDonald, and then I fancied Gilderoy Lockhart. Suppose people can fancy whoever they want, don't you?"

"I...yes, I suppose so," she gulped. It wasn't out of disgust that had her confused — there had been a man in the Coven called Odo, who preferred the company of other men as well. But it had never occurred to her that one could like both men and women, that humanity could balance that tightrope and fall into both categories of attraction, or perhaps neither, as it appeared Fulk did.

But if the heart could be attracted to anyone, no matter the sex attached, what did that mean for Lux?

"You seem uncomfortable." Sirius frowned. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No," she said a bit too fast. "No, you did nothing. I just...got stunned, for a moment. Caught me off guard."

"No worries." He flashed her an uneasy grin. "We're cool, yeah?"

"Cool," she gulped, hardly registering his words, her mind on a vastly different planet as her head spun and bones began to ache. "Yeah, yeah, we're cool."

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