Song for the mood: To jab it at Vera, Marvin Gaye's What's Going On. She hates it right now. ;-) Or, Moral Of The Story by Ashe:

It's funny how a memory
Turns into a bad dream
When running wild turns volatile

Vera

Tuesday, February 14

"Great! Another fucking Valentine's Day alone," I cursed, looking around the couple-filled café, which played Marvin Gaye's "What's Going On."

"It's just a day, Vee, and you're not alone," Saph said, placing one warm hand on mine. "You're with me."

Staring at Saph's sparkling blue eyes, I wanted to unbutton her silk blouse and see her body. However, there was no way I'd tap what Julian had.

"You've been burying yourself in court cases, working late nights and weekends. I've hardly seen you these days," she remarked.

"Well, sex is off the menu and my mojo left the building," I responded with a tight smile.

"You'll get your mojo back, Vee," she assured, moving closer to me. "Have you heard from Daddy Jim lately?"

"Uh yeah," I replied and cleared my throat. "He's kinda busy because his daughter and her partner just had a baby boy."

"Oh, Granddaddy Jim!" Saph exclaimed, then laughed softly.

"You know, for someone who has such a sweet look, you've got an incredibly dirty mind," I jested, grinning back.

"I do not have a dirty mind," she protested, then paused. "Well, maybe I'm a little dirty."

"Mmm-hmm. You know Julian misses you," I mentioned, hiding a hopeful smile behind my coffee cup.

"Oh, really?" Saph's eyes shot up like bolts of blue lights.

"Yeah. You're the one who got away," I replied, patting her arm.

"I'm seeing someone. His name is Raphael Thomas. It's only a casual thing, more like work colleagues with benefits."

"Oh, I think I know him from law school. Does he have dark curls and hazel eyes?"

"Yes, that's the guy! He's sexy as sin with the mind of Zeus and the body of Apollo."

"Hmm, be careful with that one. He seems charming, but he's shady," I warned. Raphael was ambitious-it was no surprise when he became involved in politics. The attention whore used to hijack my discussions during law lectures. The guy was a prick.

"It's just sex and friendship," Saph confessed. "It isn't love, and I don't think anyone can replace Julian."

"For heaven's sake, Saph, if you're still in love with my brother, then do something about it! He'll have you in his arms in a heartbeat!"

Saph sipped her coffee and exhaled. Gazing at me, she said, "I don't see the old Vee anymore. What's going on?"

I leaned back against my chair and blew out a slow and heavy sigh. "I'm not sure if I can have kids."

"What? Why?" Saph asked as her baby blues widened

I didn't want to scare Saph and tell her that Saira was a vindictive bitch, so I told her only what she needed to know. "I underwent a tubal ligation procedure, and the doctor did a lousy job. It happened at the start of the year."

"Sweetie, I would have been there for you!" Saph got up from her chair and hugged my shoulders. "Did you have anyone to talk to?"

"I had a good doctor at Saint John's Hospital, who helped me get through the worst. Saph..." I could barely string my words together as my chest heaved. I couldn't talk about it.

"Oh, Vee," Saph said, kissing my forehead.

"It hurts," I admitted. "I get days when I feel like shit. I mean, I didn't plan to have kids any time soon, but maybe one day..."

"Vee, look at me." Saph's eyes pierced mine.

Placing her hands on my shoulders, she said, "I love you like a sister. Your wish will come true one day, and you don't need to give birth to be a mother."

"I know," I replied. "I might become a foster parent or adopt a child. I already sponsor an orphanage in a developing country."

"See? There you go. You are a mother to these children."

I took a tissue out of my handbag and dabbed my tearful eyes. "I could have a tubal ligation reversal, but my chances of having children are slim because of what the butcher surgeon did."

"I am so sorry. Are you recovered and healthy?"

"Physically, yes. The doctor at Saint John's said I was lucky that good health was on my side." I tightened the grip of friendship on Saph's hand, which held mine.

"If there's anything you want me to do for you, let me know."

"I will," I said, forcing a smile.

Saph and I bowed our heads and our foreheads touched. She prayed to God for my body to be restored. I didn't know if any of it would help, but the gesture was kind.

"Thank you, Saph," I said after we had a minute of silence.

"Look at us. We're a crazy bunch, aren't we?" Saph cheered, pulling out her phone to show an old photo of us before I met Alistair.

Did I regret meeting Alistair? No. Would I speak to him if I saw him on the street or at a social event? I wasn't sure.

After coffee, I stopped by a newsstand and noticed the cover of a lifestyle magazine. It featured Alistair and the same woman in the social media post I saw months ago when he went on a Caribbean cruise.

Meet Alistair Scott's new bride-to-be, actress Rebecca Ross.

Picking up the magazine, I flicked through the pages until I found the article about Alistair and his fiancée, Rebecca. They announced their engagement after a whirlwind romance on the cruise ship. She came into his life when I needed him most. "I'm hoping Alistair and I can start a family after the wedding," Rebecca said in the article.

It hurt to see Alistair with a woman who appeared unmarked by the misery of life's injustices. The article revealed that Rebecca planned an extravagant birthday bash for Alistair on February seventeen.

I was not invited to the party.

The man who was once my lover was getting married. How quickly men like Alistair, with everything at their disposal, moved on.

Such is the bitterness of cruel love.

***

Alistair

Friday afternoon, February 24

"You will not launch any new technology without a successful field trial!" I barked at a colleague before abruptly ending the conversation.

Placing my mobile phone into my trouser pocket, I walked out of my office building and headed toward a market florist's stall on the city's riverside. I wanted to thank Rebecca for the birthday party she had hosted for me last week.

"How much are those tulips?" I asked the vendor, pointing at the most vibrant bunch of flowers on the stand.

"These? Oh, they're-"

Suddenly, I noticed a tall woman with caramel hair at a nearby stall, sniffing a bouquet of roses. I recognized Vera by her stance and how she rolled her hips to one side when she relaxed.

Roses. Vera always loved roses.

I watched her dark eyes look up and emit an enigmatic smile at the street vendor. Her Mona Lisa visage radiated and affected the man, who grinned from ear to ear.

Sweetheart, I've missed you.

"Sir?"

"Huh?" I snapped back to the man talking to me. "No, sorry, maybe another day."

My eyes were glued to the olive-skinned beauty, watching her every move and not wanting her to disappear into thin air.

I marched as fast as I could to Vera, rushing past the crowd of passers-by who finished work and headed in all directions toward the train station, bus stop, city mall, or the local bar.

Finally, I was just a few feet away from her.

"Vera!" I exclaimed as my heart leapt. The sight of her gave me palpitations-she had an incredible effect on my emotions.

I watched her look around before her eyes fell on me. At first, they were stone cold; then, they warmed up a little when she forced a smile.

"Vera!"

"Alistair? Hey, fancy seeing you here! It's been a while," Vera greeted, placing her hands in her pockets. She stepped back when I leaned forward, hoping to kiss her cheek.

"How are you, sweetheart?"

"I'm fine. Don't you think it's a little strange that you still call me sweetheart?" Vera asked, lifting her left eyebrow.

"Why's that?" I demanded, furrowing my own brows.

"Well, you're getting married," she reminded me. She paused and bit her lip. Damn it, woman!

"Are you trying to seduce a man who's about to get married?" I placed my thumb on her lower lip, tracing its contour. "It's when you bite your lip, you see..."

"Scotty, you can't do this. I don't like a cheating man." Vera removed my thumb from her lip.

"I'm not cheating."

"Well, you've moved on. Now, if you excuse me-"

"I never forgot you!" I shouted. "You forgot me! You did not contact me in the past few months, not even once, to see how I was doing."

"What?" Vera's eyes widened, and her mouth fell open. "I called you. I called you because I needed you, and you were the one person I could trust my life with."

"You called?" I rubbed my brow in confusion.

"Why would I lie to you, Scotty? Have I ever lied to you?"

Pulling her aside, I said, "Let's walk along the riverside, away from the crowd."

"Sure," she agreed, shrugging her shoulders.

Moments later, we sat on a bench staring at the ferries cruise up and down the river. Vera's scent floated in the breezy air like the petals of fresh frangipani flowers.

"How's your brother?"

"He's fine these days because Saira leaves him alone. How are you?"

"Terrible. I've been terrible without you," I admitted, eyeing Vera's smooth, toned shoulders as she leaned forward.

"Do you love her?" Vera asked, tilting her head to one side.

"Who?" I whispered, wishing I had never let go of Vera so easily. That was my biggest mistake. My eyes were lost in my ex-lover's presence.

"Your fiancée, Rebecca."

"No, I don't love her. However, I've come to terms with the fact that the woman I need has moved on."

"I called you after the New Year!" Vera protested. "I left messages too!"

"I never heard from you!"

"It was on the night you met Rebecca."

I shook my head in disbelief and clasped my hands between my knees. I had to think about that night. I had listened to my therapist's advice to take a short vacation. However, I didn't plan to meet Rebecca.

"The ship must have had poor reception," I said, shrugging my shoulders.

"Don't you think it's unfair to both yourself and Rebecca that you're marrying her, but you don't love her?" Vera questioned, studying my face.

"I'm attracted to her, and the sex is great. She gives me something, and I give her something in return."

"What, sex for money and fame? Are you helping her with her film career?"

I nodded, feeling ashamed in front of this lioness.

"Love might develop over time, but I'll have to forget about you first," I said, touching a soft caramel curl that blew with the wind.

"Then forget me. Leave and forget me," Vera said, flicking my hand away from her hair.

"I can't."

"I won't be your mistress! I'm worth more."

"My heart won't let me forget you, sweetheart."

"And when you make love to another woman?"

"I think of you-of us."

Vera got up from the bench. "Julian taught me that we are all like autumn leaves, which turn into nothingness in our winter days."

"Your brother is right, but it doesn't stop me from thinking of you."

"Mister Scott, it was nice seeing you today, and I wish you all the best with your wedding. It's at the end of next month, isn't it?"

"It is."

Vera waved and walked away, but I couldn't just let her go, so I sprang after her.

"Vera, stop!" I begged, grabbing her hand.

She halted, then said, "Alistair, you're marrying another woman. It's all or nothing for me. If you're serious about what you say, then act on it. If not, then it's time to say adieu."

"So, that's it?"

"Goodbye, Mister Scott."

A/N: Your thoughts? Mine: