NPOV

I remembered the day before, and the words Will had said to me.

"I love you, Nico Anderson."

Those words shouldn't have left me feeling so hollow, so vulnerable. I'm not Nico Anderson. Nico Anderson is a character, fabricated for me to hide behind. He's a combination of all the lies I've told so far. He's the one Will is in love with, not me. If Will knew who I really was, or what Octavian's forced me to do, he sure as Hell wouldn't love me. He'd be completely appalled. And I can't say I'd blame him because everyone else would be, too.

Even though I never allow myself to forget that, I still love him.

I hate myself for that. Why waste time falling in love when your feelings won't matter in the grand scheme of things? Because it's not going to matter how much I love the boy sitting across from me - this relationship was doomed to fail from the start.

And agreeing to answer Will's questions was one of the stupidest moves I've ever made, but there was still a part of me that rebelled against that logic, that fact. It was the same part that demanded for Will to know something about me that was truthful. It didn't even matter what.

I watched Will chew his lip, deep in thought. The morning light cast through the window and seemed to make him look more beautiful than he already was, something I never thought possible. It was a moment I wanted to freeze in time, to frame and visit forever.

After a while Will laughed, "I'm not sure what I should ask you. I gotta make the questions count, there's only five problems on the sheet."

"Oh well, Solace. You're the one making me answer questions in exchange for answers that may not even be right." I said, rolling my eyes. "You're supposed to do that for free."

"That was before we got together.... now I'm going to want all sorts of payment. You know.... the lovey-dovey kind."

I snorted despite the heat rushing to my cheeks, "Did you seriously just use the term lovely-dovey? What does that even mean?"

"It sounded a lot better in my head." He admitted. "But at least I got you to blush."

"Whatever." I huffed, feeling more and more flustered.

He propped his head up, with one elbow resting on the table, and just looked at me, like I was everything he wanted. So I stared right back, taking in his features and letting myself admire each and every one of them. The dusting of freckles across his face. His unruly, golden hair (that I love running my hands though). His jawline. The beautiful emotions that played in his eyes.

I wonder if he realizes how perfect he is.

"I guess I should start with the questions, huh?"

"Unless you want to tutor me like you're supposed to."

Will let out a chuckle. "Nope.... time for my first question." He straightened himself in the chair, "What's your favorite sound in the entire world?"

"That's a strange thing to ask, Solace." I remarked, with an eyebrow raised.

"You can tell a lot about someone from that question."  

I pushed a hand through my hair, and after a moment of thinking I knew the answer. "Back home, in Italy, our street was kind of loud at night. My parents would complain about it from time to time, but I always thought it was relaxing. I've missed it since we moved."

"But, isn't it loud here?"

"It's not the same type of noise - if that makes any sense? I don't know...." A smile had overtaken my face at this point because I hadn't let myself indulge in the memories of Italy in a long, long time. "It was just better."

Will was studying my expression, "You miss it, don't you?"

"Yeah, I really do.... Everything was a lot less complicated back then."

"I know what you mean." He said with a smile of his own.

That seemed to knock me out of my trance. After all, there's a reason why I don't talk about Italy anymore. It makes me miss the life I used to have before everything was ruined. 

I took a shuddering breath and asked Will for the first answer, "Did you get 5-3i for number one?"

"Yup."

"What about number two?"

"I haven't asked you another question yet, silly." Will said as he shook his head.

"Yeah you have." I used my fingers to tick them off, smirking. "You asked me about my favorite sound and whether or not I missed Italy. Try to keep up, Solace."

He gave me a look along the lines of 'You have got to be kidding me,' but relinquished the answer anyway. "I got 1/2."

"What the fuck? How?"

"Let me see your paper and I'll tell you where you went wrong, okay Neeks?"

I handed him my work, a piece of notebook paper that had definitely seen better days, and he scanned through my chicken scratch.

"You factored wrong." He said, pointing at my paper with his index finger.

"I'll rework it." I muttered.

I did the math while Will mulled over what he wanted to ask me next and, after several attempts, I got the same answer as him.

"See, that wasn't so bad."

If looks could kill, Will would be dead. But, instead of murder, I moved on to more important things. "What's your next question?"

"Right. Okay so, what should I expect when I meet your parents? Like, do you guys get along or....?" He left the question hanging in a newfound silence.

This was one of the questions I knew I needed to be careful when I answered, so that it didn't cause any suspicion. But I wanted him to know at least part of the truth, so I wasn't going to do the safe thing (which involved a complete and total lie). I realized I had let the silence go on for too long, and Will was looking at me like I was a puzzle again.

I broke the silence. "Back when I lived in Italy, our house caught on fire and my mom died. Dad moved my sister and I here afterwards, I guess he needed the change or something, I'm not sure.... I haven't seen him in years." 

"I know it doesn't change or fix anything, but I'm sorry about what happened." Will said sincerely, grabbing my hand.

"It's okay.... I've had a lot of time to get over it." I told him, although I was still having to remind myself to breathe.

His expression was still one of concern, maybe sympathy, when I took my hand back and ran it through my hair.

"Do you mind if I ask how you and Juniper made it? Like, were you old enough to live by yourselves or did you have to go through foster care?" He asked me, still concerned but wanting to know more about the situation.

But I couldn't answer that question without lying to him, and I wanted a break from having to do that. "I don't want to talk about it anymore.... I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry," He said quickly, a rush of words trying to reassure me, "Um, for number three I got 9-i."

I nodded, appreciating the change of subject, "I got the same thing."

Then came the next question, "What do you want to do after high school, maybe career-wise?"

"No idea." I shrugged, "I never really thought about it before."

Because I don't have a future.

"That's okay, you don't need to know yet. Most people don't."

"You do."

Will laughed, "I know I want to be a doctor. There are tons of different types, I'm not sure which one I want to be."

"I think you'll be good at whatever you decide on." I told him fondly.

His face lit up, "Really?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks, that means a lot to me." Will said, earning a small blush from me that I hoped he didn't catch. "I put 71 as my answer for the next problem."

"Once again, I got the same answer."

"You're getting better at this, Neeks."

"Or you're getting worse." I said bluntly, deflecting the compliment, "What's your last question?"

"Hang on, I'm thinking." Will mumbled. After a minute he perked up, "Your ring and the Mythomagic figure. Why are they so important to you?"

Because they were the last thing Bianca gave me, the last thing that connects me to her. Because they're the only things Octavian hasn't taken from me yet. They're my reminder of how quickly you can lose everything.

"My sister gave them to me.... but it's not just that.... They comfort me, you know? It's hard to describe."

It's hard to describe without letting the rest of the truth spill out.

Will's expression softened, "I was just curious. Number five's answer is -1, by the way.

"Seriously? Show me where I went wrong."

A/N ~ HEY BUDDIES

I wanted to put this up yesterday but I had a math test (I hope I passed) and then my parents dragged me to a football game.

And you guys gotta understand, I know nothing about football. I didn't even know anyone there (it was at my sister's school) so I couldn't just talk to someone.

I was very awkward and I wish I could've just stayed home.