it's finally here omgomgomgomg

. . .

three months later

Everly Clark

LETTING GO. Something that is not done easily, something that takes loads of patience, time, and healing. It's painful and refreshing. It's like you were drowning and then finally coming up for air. It took me ten years to finally let go. 

I think it all started when I stopped liking him. I still loved him, but, I didn't like him anymore and that's when I knew my mind was preparing my heart for that moment- the one where I would say 'I'm done' and finally mean it.

I don't know why we all hang onto something we know we're better off letting go. It's like we're scared to lose something we never truly had.

A pair of muscular arms hugged me from behind, kissing my neck softly, "Good morning beautiful,"

I giggled, turning around and wrapping both my arms around his neck, "Morning Gabby,"

"Come on I told you to stop calling me that," he frowned. I  laughed harder, my cheeks hurting from smiling so hard. He eventually smiled and laughed along with me.

Gabriel pulled me closer to him, kissing me softly. I smiled against the kiss, feeling butterflies fill my stomach. I never thought I would be capable of loving someone ever again, never the same way I loved Ricky.

I never thought I would fall in love with Gabriel. I guess life really does love to throw surprises at us.

"Thank you for loving me when I was full of heartache and war," I mumbled, looking into his soft, blue eyes.

"Don't ever thank me," Gabriel immediately responded, shaking his head slightly, "I fell in love with all of you. Your demons and your angels."

I smiled, closing my eyes and savoring the moment. I was thankful for this moment because if there is one thing I learned it was that you could lose everything in a matter of seconds. So appreciate what you have right now.

That small feeling of happiness? Savor it while it lasts. The little things that make you feel alive? Engage in those. Just stop and look around you and be thankful for it.

You see, the truth is that so many people seem to miss is that happiness doesn't start with a relationship, a job or a college degree. It starts with your thoughts and what you tell yourself every day. You influence your own happiness, your own life.

My closure didn't come from him, it came from knowing deep in the middle of my heart that I did everything I could. That I went above and beyond for that man. I became a whole other person and it still wasn't enough. My closure didn't come from Ricky, no it came from me. My closure came from finally realizing that everyone isn't for everyone and him and I just weren't meant for each other.

Ricky's a father now. Gwen recently gave birth to a healthy baby boy, it turns out she was pregnant the whole time. I always knew Ricky would be an amazing dad, he always had been good with children.

It was a good thing I did- letting him go. Even though it was probably one of the hardest things I have ever done, it was worth it. I'm good now, I am perfectly good now.

"So your parents are three months sober now," Gabriel announced, handing me a smoothie.

I nodded happily, "Yes! God, I can't wait to see them again,"

I guess in the end it all did work out. Perhaps not the exact way I wanted to if you asked me a couple of years ago what I wanted; it most definitely wouldn't have been this. But in a way, this was better.

Both Gabriel and I have never been more successful with our careers. We've both been living together, never once worrying about finance.

My parents were both sober and living happily in their rehab home.  I was finally catching small glimpses of my real parents, the ones who loved their family unconditionally.

Scottie and everyone who worked with him went to prison for the rest of their lives. Turns out I wasn't his only victim.

As for I? I have finally been cleared from physical therapy, sure some of the memories may never leave but that's okay because it's a part of me. The pain, sadness, fury, as well as the happiness and joy, are all a part of me.

At the end of the day, you can either focus on what's tearing you apart or what's holding you together. So, just start. Start right where you are. Start with your fear and pain. Start with your hands trembling and voice shaking. Start and don't you dare stop. Start where you are, with what you have.

From there, you'll slowly love yourself first, instead of loving the idea of other people loving you. From then you'll heal.

Just always be the better person and make your intentions pure. What and who you are is what you'll attract and what you'll maintain. Pain is inevitable and it forever comes back to you but if you focus on what you're feeling and why you feel that you will overcome it.

I glanced at the text I had just received, it was from Ricky. Oh God, I let out a loose breath and opened it up.

I understand why you did what you did three months ago. I understand Everly. It's glad to see you happy, you deserve it. I miss you, perhaps we can meet up once again in the future?

I smiled and hugged the phone to my chest and whispered, "Definitely Ricky, definitely,"

THE END
WHO WE WERE

. . .

a/n: oh my flipping gosh. oh, my freaking goshhhhhhhh!!!!!

guys i just finished a book omg omg omg omg! i'm actually dying right now because i never thought i would ever be able to actually finish a book! this is huge news to me because i've always wanted to complete a book and i never thought i would bc of my procrastination skills!!!

anyway, i'm not going to go into detail right now because the next chapter will be full of my thank yous and that cool stuff! be sure to stick around for a bit! :)

thank you all so much! <333