After that whole ordeal, you and the rest of the squad took shelter in the same warehouse that Jean and Armin were taken to when they were body doubles. Everyone sat on separate crates, facing the lantern in the middle. Sasha was outside on guard. You, however, were sitting on the same crate as Levi, your back against his. You weren't hungry. You felt full. Thankfully, you managed to find some bullets to reload your single gun in the warehouse. You'll have to find another gun to replace it.

"What's wrong? This grimy place kill your appetite?" You heard Levi ask.

"No..." Was Armin's quiet reply. "Jean, there's something I don't understand..."

"What's that?" Jean questioned.

"When I shot that gun to save you... I honestly thought I didn't make it in time. Sorry, but... why was I the one who shot first?"

"That's..."

"Because the other person hesitated," Levi interrupted Jean. You felt his back vibrate from his voice. "It's true." You closed your eyes and rubbed your foot against the stone ground.

"Armin, I'm sorry... I should've done what I had to do," Jean said, his eyes locked to the floor. 

"I know what it is... the person that I killed... I bet they were a nice person. Someone that was much more human than I am. I pulled the trigger so easily... I did... I'm..."

"Armin, you've got blood on your hands now. You can't go back to who you were," Levi spoke up.

"Why would you say that?" Mikasa asked. Your eyes flickered over to her for a split second.

"Embrace the new you. Just think, if your hands were still clean... Jean wouldn't be here right now."
You turned your head to look over his shoulder at Armin. To be honest, when you first saw him, he was a wuss. He could barely stand on his two legs in front of you. So for him to shoot someone with no hesitation slightly surprised you.

"I'll tell you why you pulled the trigger... because your comrade was about to die. Armin... thanks to you getting blood on your hands, nobody on our squad ended up dead. Thank you," Levi said. It was quiet between all of you for a moment, his words sinking into everyone.

"Hey, Miss Y/n?" The blonde called out quietly.

"Mm?" You hummed in response, standing up and finally facing into the circle.

"What was it like... for you, when you killed someone for the first time?"

"That's an uncharacteristic question," you replied flatly, crossing your arms.

"But... if you're so curious, I'll tell you."

~
"You failed?" He asked the girl in front of him. Her head was hung low. "I didn't waste three years of my life training you so you could fail." He walked around her, circling her like a shark.

"She was a lot more dangerous than you anticipated, Boss," she replied quietly, her weight shifting between her feet.

"So your failure is my fault?" He challenged, stopping in front of her. She swallowed, her eyes nervously staring into his coal black ones.

"Well, no... but it would've been appreciated if I had accurate report on her strengths," she bravely replied back.

"Fight her again... and win."

~
"The first time I killed someone wasn't a choice that came consequence free," you began, your expression dark. "If I didn't, I'd die, if I did, I'd have to kill. You don't even know about this, Levi." You looked down at him.

"When I was eleven, I was forced into the Fighting Pit, a part of the group Beta 6," you began.

Your eyes widened when you stared up at the stands of screaming people who were shouting over each other. In front of you was a large group of boys, all ranging from ages seven to thirteen. You looked around at the girls around you.

'Why is this happening?' You thought as a robed person stepped into the ring.

"Anyone who is not age nine or ten, leave the pit," he instructed. Like robots, the younger and older children filed out and into the chained area. Another robed figure walked into the pit and dumped different weapons to the ground. "Battle to the death!" The roars of the crowd grew louder.

"Last girl and boy standing lives! Fight!"
No one moved for a good while. Everyone just looked at each other, unsure.

"Fight!!!"
"What are you doing?!"
"Knock each other's teeth out!!"
"Kill each other already!!"
You were the first one who moved. Sliding to the pile of weapons, you grabbed a small katana. The bloodshed begun after that. 

"I was the first one who killed. Then it was a chain reaction after that. At the end, it was only me and this one boy. I beat him, but I didn't kill him. I don't know what happened to him after that. All I know was that he disappeared. I was taken away, experimented on, and the rest is history." You ended.

"So... you had to fight and kill... children?" Connie asked, his voice shaking. It seemed your backstory shook them up. Even Mikasa seemed slightly disturbed.

"I had a choice. If I didn't fight, I'd die, if I did, I'd have to kill everyone. It wasn't a pleasant decision, but I made it, and I don't regret it. You shouldn't, either. Survival is your number one priority. Don't throw it away," you advised, strictly looking at Armin. He stared back at you, his eyes wide. You let out an inaudible sigh at the recollection.

'That wasn't... something I wanted to remember.' You thought. You felt Levi's gaze on you, but you ignored it.

"Now, then," he finally said, standing up. "It's about time we hear what he has to say." He was talking about the guy who you had hogtied beforehand. Levi walked over to him, crouching down and removing the gag from his mouth.

"Wait! I'm just an old man used for moving wagons around the—"

"I've met this man once before," Mikasa spoke up, walking next to Levi. "In the city, people were calling him Boss." She pointed at him.

"Yeah, I know. Dimo Reeves, right?" Levi inquired.

"We were just following orders the Military Police forced on us. And failed big time... they'll plunder the Reeves Company for all that its worth," Dimo said, "They won't stop with me and my dumb son. They'll make sure all my employees die in so-called accidents." You walked away from the group and exited out of the door where Sasha was standing.

"Miss Y/n," she greeted, slightly shocked at your presence.

"It's my shift now. Go inside and rest up," you ordered, leaning against the building.

"Are you sure?" She asked, standing in front of you.

"Yes, now go."

"Ye-yes!" She exclaimed, walking back inside the building. You looked up at the sky, noticing it was a deep orange and red. It was getting cooler out. You don't know how long you were out there. It couldn't have been long, though. Light flooded to the ground below you.

"Hey, you alright?" You heard Levi ask. He stepped out of the warehouse and stood next to you, his arms crossed.

"Yeah," you replied monotonously.

"Is what you said true? About killing children?"
You shifted on your legs, your eyes half lidded.

"Yeah. It is." They closed, your head tilting down.

"I didn't know. Why didn't you tell me?" He asked once more.

"I figured you wouldn't want to hear about it. It's pretty morbid," you replied.

"If it's anything about you, I don't care what it's about. I want to hear it."

"Yeah, right."
Levi didn't say anything in response, but kept looking at you, his gaze soft.

"This is the most you've talked lately. What's going on?" He asked, leaning on the wall closer to you than before.

"Something's just... wrong," you replied, shaking your head slightly. "I haven't been communicating as much because I'm trying to figure it out myself. That's all." Levi didn't believe that completely, but he knew prying any further wouldn't get results.

"All right. I'm here, though. Don't forget that," he replied, placing a quick kiss on your head before going back into the building. You shook your head.

'As if I would.'

Ja ne!

{Ruby Red}