Having the gang back together is bittersweet. I know that they have a lot of things going on in their lives, Lord knows I do as well, but I think Maggie would really appreciate the idea that we are all getting together to remember her one last time.

"I talked with the new Principal of Grover View and explained our idea for the fundraiser in Maggie's honor. I think it would be a cool thing to get her a scholarship named after her," Diana says. "You know how she always liked to help people."

I resist the urge to snort at that statement. I loved Maggie. She was my friend, but helping people was not in that girl's mannerisms. Every time I saw her helping someone it was for her gain. I never saw her do it for the sake of her good heart.

I feel like people have a bad habit of rewriting history when it comes to someone dying. Every crime podcast in the world always says that the victim "lit up the room whenever they walked in," or "was the best friend anyone could have asked for," and I find that hard to believe.

People are not one-dimensional. They're layered. For every person who loved Maggie, there was someone who hated her all the same.

I'm not trying to speak ill of the dead. I'm just trying to keep it realistic. Maggie was layered, but she was mostly layered as an asshole.

"I can get some news circulating through my TikTok," Briar says confidently. "If we wanted to do some sort of GoFundMe to make the first one a huge success I could do that as well."

"Who is the fund going to benefit?" asks Declan. "I know that scholarships always have some sort of parameters for who gets to apply."

"It needs to be open for everyone," says Joel confidently. "Maggie would have wanted that."

I sit there quietly on purpose. Once again knowing that it wasn't true. I'm not saying people wouldn't be able to change in 6 years. I know I have.

I look out of the window of the diner and into the parking lot. Sitting there in the passenger seat of my car is Kenny as he bobs his head side to side listening to music and scrolling on TikTok. My heart begins to flutter when I see him sitting there, and nerves begin to build up in my stomach about who he is to me.

I might not be able to tell my parents, but these are my friends. They're the people that I went through the most traumatic experience of my life with. If I can't tell them, who can I tell?

It was late at the party. We were one of the last groups still there, and a boy had been circulating the DJ booth where I was mixing the songs for the last hour. I had known him. He wasn't from Grover View, but he was from the next town over. All of our small towns got together in the summer to party. When there isn't a large selection of kids to hang out with you tend to mix and match.

He'd been eyeing me for a long time, dancing closer and closer to me, giving me side glances to ensure that I was watching him as he swayed to the music. I would flirt back. I winked at him, it makes me cringe now, but it was all I knew to do at the moment.

Diana and I had just broken up after an emotional moment of me coming out to her. I had felt guilty leading her on knowing that I would never be able to reciprocate the feelings she has for me. To my surprise, she was more than understanding after the initial shock wore off. She encouraged me to come out, but when your dad is the pastor of one of the only churches in Grover View, and he has very homophobic views, that isn't as easy as it seems.

The boy moves closer until finally, he's standing right in front of the makeshift booth that I've been spinning at tonight.

"Come with me," he said.

I nodded, quickly typing into my computer and queueing the next three or four songs.

He takes me by my hand, and I remember the nerves that flowed through my body as I let him lead me down the hallway of the house we were currently crashing. I made sure no one was watching, but we were all in such a drunk haze that no one was paying attention to someone we weren't directly speaking to.

He opened up the door, and we disappeared into one of the bedrooms. His lips crashed into mine, and fireworks of nerves and excitement shot through my body. I deepened the kiss and wrapped my arms around his waist pulling him as close to me as physically possible. He broke apart from our kiss and his lips started to trail down my neck when the door opened.

"Oh."

Wide-eyed and in shock I saw Maggie standing in the doorway with her jaw slack. A cruel smirk crossed across her face and she chuckled before she closed the door.

"Ezra?"

I turn my head to look at who said my name. Diana is sitting across the booth from me, her eyes are filled with worry and concern that I dazed out of the conversation. "It isn't like you to disappear in one of these conversations," she says. "You okay?"

I clear my throat and pull my phone out of my pocket. I text Kenny to come inside the diner. He takes a second to open the text, but gets out of the car quickly and walks to the front. The bell rings as he opens the door and walks to the table we're sitting at.

"Can I help you?" asks Declan confused.

"Holy shit, is that Briar Oakland?" asks Kenny looking at me confused. "You didn't tell me one of your friends was Briar Oakland-"

"I'm sorry, I'm not really doing pictures right now," says Briar apologetically. I can tell she's not comfortable saying that, but she's uncomfortable with the random boy who just walked up to the table.

"No, guys," I interrupt. "I told him to come. This is Kenny," I say. I look at Diana whose eyes widen and a wide grin spreads across her face. "He's, uh, my boyfriend."

"Guilty," says Kenny throwing his hands up in the air like he's in a police hold-up. "It's nice to meet you all."

The table is quiet, all of them are shocked at the news of my news except for Diana. Surprisingly it was Declan who stood up first and clapped Kenny on the back wrapping him into a tight bear hug. "Any friend of Ezra's is a friend of ours. It's nice to meet you, man. Tell me, does Ezra still snore like he did when we were in high school and have our bro nights?"

"Like a bear," says Kenny as he grabs a chair from the table behind us and sits at the edge of the booth. The others break out into a laugh and the conversation begins to flow easily between them. I knew it would. Kenny is amazing. He's extraverted, but he's also just extra. People tend to gravitate toward that. It's one of my favorite things about him considering I'm so introverted.

My phone buzzes and I look down to see a message from Diana pop up across the screen.

Proud of you, Ez :)

I look at her and mouth "Thank you."

She winks and returns to the chicken tenders that are in front of her. When we finish eating Briar asks for the check, but Rhonda shakes her head. "Absolutely not," she says. "It's been a treat to see you guys here again."

We thank her and leave the diner and walk toward the parking lot when Diana reaches her hand out to stop me.

"Are you going to tell your dad?" she asks me curiously.

"I don't know if he's exactly ready for that," I tell her trying to slug off the conversation. "You...know how he is. He's very fire and brimstone, and I'm not sure I'm ready to subject myself or Kenny to that."

"How are you going to get around him being here?" she asks pointedly.

"We're only here for a week. He's just a "good buddy" of mine who is going to travel with me for a few months after we just finished school. They don't need to know anything else yet."

She nods. "Well, Penelope Vale is having the annual bonfire she used to have every year at her parent's farm tonight. I'd love for you to bring Kenny so I can get to know him."

Diana was the one person from high school I wish I had taken the time to stay in contact with once we went to college. She was the only person I had ever been able to tell my secret to back in the day. Well, the only one that knew about it that didn't judge me for it.

"Maggie!" I called out to her as I unhooked myself from the stranger boy and ran out of the bedroom. My lips felt swollen from the intense kissing, and my neck still tingled from the spots of my neck he had trailed with kisses.

"Maggie, please!"

She turned at the end of the hall with a confused face on. "Ezra? What do you need, buddy?"

The way she said it made me feel sick to my stomach. Like she was sitting on top of the juiciest secret she could have ever gotten ahold of. Like she wanted to spread it around even if I'm considered "one of her best friends."

"Maggie, I'm...I'm not.."

"You're not the child of a pastor who I just saw lip-locking with another boy? Tell me, Ezra, had I not walked in what was going to happen? Do you even have protection? Honestly, Ezra, I thought you were smarter than this."

"I-" I began. I didn't think I was going to go that far. I thought it was just going to be a make-out. I've only ever made out with anyone at that point.

"Look, you being gay is your business. Just don't go busting it open for random boys at parties, Ezra."

"Maggie, you can't say anything."

"You literally just let him lead you through the house, Ezra. If people weren't drunk and confused you'd be the talk of the town by the morning."

Shame, shame is what I felt as her words left her mouth and circled around my ears. They cut deep into my heart and made the pit in my stomach bottom out into nothingness as her words played on repeat in my head.

You'd be the talk of the town by the morning.

The boy came out of the room and wrapped his hand around my waist. "Where'd you run off to, babe?" he whispered in my ear as he planted a kiss along my jawline. A shiver of delight ran through my body that was only able to be interrupted by the fear and realization as to what this girl knew and how it could ruin my life.

"Your friend is waiting, Ez," she disappeared from the empty hallway and I found myself following that boy back into the room. I needed to feel something. Anything other than the shame I felt coursing through me in that moment.

So I did.

"Yeah," I say to her with a smile. Diana was not Maggie. My friends didn't judge me for my partner. Everything worked out for the best. "Yeah, we'll come."

However, the small voice in the back of my head that sounded a lot like Maggie reminded me that this isn't like New York, and people in Grover View aren't nearly as accepting as I'd like them to be. I know I can't be affectionate with him here. I know we can't be as reckless as I was with that random boy the night of the party.

Sure, my parents aren't thinking twice about Kenny sharing a room with me while we're here, but that's because my siblings are all in the other rooms. Sure, we might be able to sneak some forbidden kisses in. Sure we might even be able to cuddle and express our love freely the way that we have been the past year but here, at Grover View I can never be myself.

If word got back to my dad there would be nothing that could stop the disaster that would start brewing. He'd never let me live this down.

You'd be the talk of the town by the morning.

I just hope Kenny can understand.