When the waves come crashing
And the rocks go bashing
And the sun disappears
But I've faced all my fears
Will it all be worth it?
Will I still deserve you?
All the acts I've committed
All the pain I've delivered

When the skies grow darker
And I can't find your marker
I'll be searching all day
'Cause I can't let you slip away
When my punishment finds me
Will I had caught up with you?
When my time is over
Will I still love you?

And the world goes faster
It runs in the blink of an eye
And the tides get heavy
Like the beach is awake all night
All I can think of
Is all the mistakes over the years
Was it worth it, was it worth
Crashing down in tears?

Was it worth it, was it worth
Poppin' open all those beers?
Was it worth it, was it worth

Flyin' away when I was so close,
To just touch this goodness, oh whoa,
When I could've done it right,
When I could've stopped this fight,
When I was alive

I turned off my music, looking out at the night sky. The stars burned small, the few specks of traces of them anyways. New York has destroyed the stars. I sighed, and flung my legs over the edge of my bed.

I stretched my arms and rolled my shoulders, and then slipped on my shoes. I tied them tight, and grabbed my phone, shoving it in my side pant pocket. I looked at my door, listening, making sure my parents did not wake. Then I looked back at my window, opened it, and climbed out.

~~

I walked until I couldn't, and then kept walking until I found trees. It must've taken at least an hour or two. It's not many trees, but enough to wander alone in. It amazes me how there are still trees in New York.

I look around, recognizing where I am. I try not to think about it. I try not to think about anything. I wander around aimlessly until I look up at the moon, the stars. I sigh. I've been out for hours.

I suddenly feel the tiredness in my legs. I look around, and turn a corner. I find a rock, but I also-

I freeze.

I straighten my posture and level my chin, and walk gently towards him. I sit next to him on the rock.

He looks over and attempts to smile. I just look him in the eyes. He looks so. . . sad.

"Looks like we both have things to explain." I state. I wasn't sure if I wanted to, but I concluded that Leo is more important to me than silly questions in my head.

"Yeah." he says, but doesn't begin.

"I have a feeling what I'm about to say will be so stupid compared to what you have, and I hate sounding like a wimpy, whiney idiot, but. . ." I expected him to argue with me, to tell me that's not what I am, but he continues to look at the dirt. "B-but, I. . . I don't know how to tell you, I. . . I'm confused, with myself," I think, and gasp for the words, struggling. "I'm questioning everything I thought I knew about. . ."

"About yourself? Yeah, I get that." he says, somewhat sarcastically. Before I can speak again, he continues, "Of all the lives I could've had, I have this one. Where I run and run and run like a coward from every and any home I get placed in, and I can't catch a break. Not with anything. Makes me wonder if it's worth fighting."

I feel breathless, but not in the way you may think. I feel like I will never breathe again, shocked, surprised, I feel his pain. Leo. . .

"It is. It's worth every blow," I assure. I slump my back and look down too. "It's worth every single punch, every single scream, every single emotion."

"How do you know?" he demands, making my wrists flinch.

"I. . . I complicate things. I make myself feel a lot of pain. Especially after my sister died. I blamed myself for her death. I hated myself for it. I still do, a little. And, I don't know who I am either. At all. I thought I did. Maybe I don't know anything, maybe I'm living my own lies."

I feel like an ocean is pounding against me, making me shake, feeling the fright. What will be Leo's reaction? What will happen? Leo listened to all of it, but doesn't reply for a long time.

At last, he responds, "We're both idiots." I hear a forced laugh--I try it out too. It's not as nice I'd wish, but it's good enough, I guess.

"I guess so." I nod.

"Maybe we can help each other."

"Maybe."

EDITED.
FEEL FREE TO POINT
OUT ANY MISTAKES.