noah cameron schnapp

eleanor smiled widely. "yes, noah." she said continuing to smile. "i'll be your girlfriend." she  giggled. we stared at eachother and began to lean in, we kissed once more. "this view is beautiful." i said turning to face the balcony as if i hadn't seen this view every single year since the day i was born. my mom used to bring me up here and let me sit on the balcony, holding on tightly so i would not fall. her grip was always so calming to me. we'd count the stars together as if her big event wasn't happening below us. in the last few years, i had been coming up here by myself. the first year i looked at this view alone, i begged and begged my mom to come with me, but she refused. i sat on the floor leaning against the balcony crying until the event was over and they had to come find me. this year i had eleanor and i wasn't just that sad little boy, i had her, my girlfriend. i stared off the ledge, stuck in thought. "are you okay?" eleanor said with concern. "w-what? yeah. i'm fine." i said snapping back into reality. "maybe we should go back down...so they don't think we're missing." she suggested. i nodded. we walked down the stairs silently. "your parents seem nice, i just can't believe i haven't met them before. i mean, i'm with you so much." eleanor said lightheartedly. i felt tension rise up inside of me. "i know you haven't." i snapped. i regretted it immediately after. she looked back at me, her eyebrows furrowed. "i-i didn't mean it." i said quickly. "it's okay." she said not looking back at me. i stopped in the hallway as we reached the bottom. "can we talk?" i asked her. she turned. "of course." she responded. "just not here, with everyone, everywhere." i said. she put her hand out for me to grab it. we interlocked our hands and went to get our jackets. the night would be ending soon so our absence wouldn't matter all that much. the driver pulled up and we slid in. rain began to pour down. the pattern of it hitting the roof of the car was soothing. eleanor closed her eyes although i know she wasn't actually sleeping. she lifted her head just before i said "we're here." we rode in the elevator up to my floor. we plunged onto my bed as we got into my room. eleanor slid her heels off as she groaned that her feet hurt. i laid on my back next to her. her long dress was scrunched up to her knees, exposing her legs. it was silent for a few minutes. "i know you haven't met my parents before... i didn't mean to snap at you, ella." i told her. she stayed silent. "my parents are never here, i practically live alone." i said leaving spaces between my sentences. "and-, uh nevermind." i said stopping myself. "noah. you need to let it out or it won't do you any good." she said shifting to her side to look at me. i stared into her eyes. i've never really talked to anyone about this. i swallowed. "please just let me in, i want to help you. i know how it feels to be alone." she said sitting fully up. i sat up with her, our backs against my beds backboard. "i-i just feel so lonely. all the time. it's just me here...a lot. and i can't take it." i said. i told her everything there was to say. tears welt up in my eyes. eleanor put her hand on my back as a single tear rolled down my cheek. i began to fully cry, letting cries out. "i just want my mom." i sobbed. eleanor hugged me. i leaned into her. she tried to wipe my tears with her thumb but they just kept rolling down my face. "it's okay, noah, it's okay." she said trying to calm me down. she ran her fingers through my hair. i laid my head on her shoulder as we laid back down. she kept running her fingers through my hair to calm me down and my breathing became steady again. "noah, you need to talk to them, or her." she told me. "i know." i murmured "but it's so hard." we both began to fall asleep, as i was almost into a slumber, her phone began to buzz. she answered. "my mom's here, noah. i have to go. do you want to go with me?" she asked. i shook my head. "i think i'm going to talk to her." i said. she nodded and leaned down to kiss me. she left out the door and turned my light off. i checked the time. it was 12:38 a.m., my parents would be home any minute. i sat up and closed my eyes until i heard the door open. i walked out of my room and my house was dark. "mom?" i called out. "honey? i thought you'd be sleeping by now, where's eleanor?" she said turning the light on. she turned to face me and my teary face. "noah, are you alright?! why are you crying?" she said. "can we talk?" i said with my voice cracking. an hour later, i sat there in her arms crying my heart out. now she knew how i felt.