Boy were we fucking wrong when we thought we were getting close. We thought we'd get there pretty early on that Saturday, but then we found out the truth the hard way and found that we probably wouldn't even reach the Royal before four. This news really put our moods to shit. We were tired and hungry and desperate to see the body.

"Aw shit!" Teddy had said. "So what are we gonna do now?"

"It's still closer out going ahead. Let's go," said Chris and I nodded in agreement. We'd come this whole way, why should we turn around now? I was starting to get a low temper, my very impatient nature beginning to take over. You ever heard that saying that redheads have a natural bad temper? Well, it's fucking true, let me tell you. I was definitely getting agitated.

Relief came to me when I noticed clouds forming overhead, perfect cover for a ginger. I knew I was severely sunburned and I hoped and prayed that my mother still had one of her aloe plants in the sun room. I'd be needing them, that was for certain. The only problem with the clouds, however, was that we all thought it unlikely to rain, as it hadn't even rained since the beginning in the summer, back in July.

We stopped again when Vern got a blister.

"Is it gonna rain, Gordie?" Teddy asked, almost desperately.

"I think so," said Gordie. I looked up at the sky and noticed the clouds growing darker. Maybe, I though to myself.

"Pisser! The pisser good end to a pisser good day!" I couldn't help but laugh. I didn't think it was actually funny, but I was so worn out that I found anything to be funny. It certainly brightened my mood, at least.

Sometime past two, we concluded that it was definitely going to rain and I was definitely relieved. It still didn't give us much relief from the day's heat, but I was just glad that the sun wasn't still beating down on me angrily.

Some lightning licked at the sky, followed by thunder. The guys pissed about how we were going to get caught in the storm, but I didn't mind. I was too exhausted to complain or argue or anything.

Finally, around three-thirty, we heard and saw some running water through the trees.

"That's it!" Chris shouted gleefully. "That's the Royal." He was so excited, I thought he'd blast off right out of his socks.

I looked up at the sky. It had grown remarkably dark now. I wondered, for a brief moment, if we had pissed off God. Maybe the Upperhand didn't want us coming to see the body because maybe He knew that we weren't coming to see him to take him home; He knew we'd just gone to find him out of our own pleasure and satisfaction. We thought we'd benefit from finding the body and God knew what we'd done and was pissed. Was that was it was like to sin? Like, to really sin, I mean.

Sometimes, now, I think back to when I had imagined God being pissed at the five of us for disrespecting the dead and tell myself that it's total bullshit just so I don't give myself an anxiety attack about it. Deep down, I knew, in some goddamn way, that's exactly what it was. God was fucking mad.

"There! There he is! Right there! I see him!" Vern screamed and I, although desperately wanting to see the body before, I made myself keep my gaze locked on the sky for awhile. Finally, I grew the courage to turn toward where Vern had been pointing to. I joined the others, all four boys crowding around on the tracks to look down at the underbrush that contained the body of the missing Ray Brower.

I didn't even pay attention to the smell. All I saw was the hand. It was whiter than even my own pasty, fair skin. Lightning flicked behind us, lighting up the sky. I paid no mind to it. I didn't think I wanted to. I wanted to look away from where the body was hiding in the brush and just start walking back toward Castle Rock, but I couldn't make myself to do it.

"Sheee..." I heard Chris say somewhere in the far off. I couldn't tell if he'd actually finished the cuss word or if he'd broken off. I stood and stared off, not at the body, not at the other four, not anywhere in particular. I felt my hair sway with the breeze, but I didn't even make to tuck the stray strands behind my ears. I felt rain begin to pelt at my skin. It was nice, compared to the heat, but I couldn't make myself care that it was raining, that we'd found the body.

Then God began to cry. The rain eased on, then it came all in one huge storm. And I just stood there in marvel. I stood in total dismay as the others started to trudge down the hill. I finally forced my limbs to start moving, at which point I realized I had taken a seat in the middle of the tracks. I walked down the hill to join the others, all of us soaking wet.

I took in the whole sight that was Ray. It was like he had made to do a train dodge, but he hadn't been quick enough.  His Keds were hanging in some brambles just a few feet away. I gulped. I didn't know if it was loud or if I had even imagined it happening. We all just stood there in shock, in despair, in silence, in awe.

"Shit," I said silently, though I don't know if the others heard me or not. I felt something roll down my cheek. At that point, I didn't know if it was of God's tears or of my own.

A bug crawled out of his mouth and scuttled across his face before disappearing to the other side of his face.

"D'joo see that?" Teddy asked, astonished. I grimaced. "I bet he's fucking full of bugs! I bet his brains are-"

I let a sob out. I couldn't help it anymore.

"Shut up, Teddy," said Chris. I felt him grab my hand, but I didn't quite acknowledge it. I turned toward Chris and buried my face in his chest. I let loose all my sobs. I didn't now if it had been the sight of Brower, the heat, the exhaustion, or what that had caused me to cry, but once I started, I couldn't stop. It was pretty pathetic. But I didn't care. I cried for a few more minutes until it was just little hiccups and I pulled away from Chris. I turned just then and caught sight of a familiar blonde headed asshole.

"Well what the fuck do you know about this?" Ace said.