Chapter 30

But he was just gone.  It was like he had vanished. I finally called Bruce, who told me that Kane wouldn't leave with him, and that he left Prom in his own car, an hour later. He hadn't heard from him since.  Sunday dinner, I assume, went on without Kane or me, and I finally ended up at Georgia's house that evening. It was a school night, but it was the last week of school, so her mom said I could spend the night. I just couldn't go home. I couldn't face what was happening.

   Kane didn't show up the next day at school the next day, or the day after that. I was barely able to get through the days without crying, not to mention that Trenton and Jessie were also MIA. I felt like a zombie, though I was sure glad to have Georgia by my side. She made me feel like I was okay, even though I wasn't. At all.

   Finally, I got a text from Jessie, on Tuesday night. I hadn't seen or heard from her since Prom, Saturday evening, when she hadn't been feeling well. She'd also been sick a few weeks before that. I didn't exactly think anything of it, though.

   So, I'm pregnant, her text said.

   I honestly had no idea what to say back to this. I was shocked, and I just started crying. She was seventeen, her parents hated Trenton's mom, and this was not something that was supposed to happen to them. They were both registered for the community college for September. Now she was pregnant and I knew everything was going to change, somehow.

   Wow, are you okay? I sent back to her, awhile later. What else was I supposed to say?

   I know, right? I've been pretty sick so... I took the test on Sunday. Trenton is kind of freaking out.

   What about you? I asked her.

   Jessie : I'm okay. I mean, I think I'm in shock.

   Me: No kidding.

  Jessie: Have you heard from Kane yet?

   Me: No.

  Jessie: Sorry. That sucks. I heard what happened at Prom.

  Me: Yeah. Well, Kane is MIA now.

  Jessie: And I'm pregnant.

  Call me when you can? Or if you need anything? I asked.

  I will.

   The next morning, Trenton and Kane were both at school, by the gym doors, like usual. They were even acting like nothing had happened, as if not showing up for two days after what happened at Prom was okay. I walked over, smiling at Trenton. He nodded, but didn't say anything. Then I pulled Kane's arm and made him follow me around to the side of the building, so we were alone. I wanted to scream, but I was too glad to see him.

   "Look, Marley... I'm sorry," he said, not looking sorry at all. He looked fine, which annoyed me.

   "Yeah? You disappeared for three days, again.. is that just your thing?" I asked him, angry.

   "I had to... to let things calm down a bit. But I couldn't stay at Trenton's..."

   "Jessie told me, yesterday."

   "Yeah. It's all crazy right now. So, I went to Lower Hills, to stay with a friend -"

   "You're such a jackass," I said, looking right into his eyes. I stepped back, so I wasn't touching him anymore.

   "Marley..." He reached for my hand, trying. His face suddenly looked worried.

   "No, I'm serious. You couldn't have texted me in three days? You promised me it would be okay."

   "It is okay."

   "It's not. I'm not doing this with you if you're going to run away every time something bad happens," I said seriously. The words just came out.

   "Marley, your dad looked like he wanted to kill me."

   "You're supposed to be with me through this shitty stuff, not be hiding out," I told him, stepping back again.

   "I'm sorry, okay?" he asked, trying to pull me closer. I wanted to let him.

   "No," I said instead, shaking my head.

   "What do you mean, no?" He actually looked devastated, now. I knew I was hurting him by doing this, but he had hurt me first.

   "Just prove that to me that you will stay and face our shit together, not leave. Okay?" I asked, taking in a breath.

   "Marley, your parents hate me. I might as well go to school in Michigan," he said quickly. Immediately, I saw regret on his face. But the words were said, and he obviously meant them.

   My mouth dropped open; he looked surprised at his own words. I should have hugged him, and told him we would figure this out together, but I didn't. I just stepped back. I was sad. And angry. And I just wanted to hurt him, now, like he'd hurt me.

   "Fine, go," I told him, staring into his eyes again.

   "Mar, no." He stumbled on his words, as I turned to leave.

   His hand reached out and grazed mine but I pulled it away, walking fast. Then I was gone. Maybe there was no turning back from this. 

It was a good thing there was only exams the following week, and also I was lucky that my grades were good enough that my exams didn't matter too much. I couldn't focus. I could barely stop crying. I wanted to go back and undo what I'd done, but it was too late. Kane had taken what I said seriously and wasn't even trying to text me. It was possible that I'd lost him, for real. 

   His birthday was the following weekend. We made had plans to go camping, with Trenton and Jessie. These plans were made long before Prom and before Jessie knew she was pregnant, and before Kane and I fell apart. I stayed in my bedroom, crying and sleeping and ignoring my parents, and my phone, for days. My mom brought me snacks and begged me to eat, but didn't bother trying to talk to me. She knew everything was messy for me, now.

   Georgia came over,  after I had ignored her calls all weekend. I just cried on her shoulder, for an hour, and didn't say a word. She knew it was bad, whatever it was.  And she had no idea how glad I was that she was there.