cruel words, cruel misjudgments, cruel choices, now comes down to cruel love...

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Content Warning: homophobia, blood

When I reach the flag posts in the morning, the only soul I find there is Cheng. Surprisingly he acknowledges me with a nod.

"Hey," I mumble.

"Xian..." he says. I look at him silently. "Sorry... about what I said the other day. I didn't mean it."

I shake my head. "Forget it. You didn't say anything I didn't deserve." I reply. "It'll be over now anyway."

"What did you do?" he asks with a sigh.

I shrug. "Just scared Wen Chao a bit."

That's when Sang arrives, excitedly showing us something on his screen. "Dude, Wen Chao posted another article. It's the real judgment this time." He stops as he notices the bandage on my arm. "You sowed him his place, didn't you? That's the Xian we know." He says while cheerfully slapping my back. "But this is the first time seeing you properly treated it." He comments.

"Lan Zhan did it," I reply.

Sang dramatically knocks his forehead. "Right... I forgot about your perfect boyfriend. Where is he anyway?" he asks.

"I don't think he'll make it today," I reply. He didn't text me this morning. I figured that he must be tired after last night. It was almost midnight when he left our place to rush to the airport. He must have stayed up all night.

Sang's phone buzzes with a notification. "'Morning class canceled. See you after lunch'. Says Xingchen." He says after checking it.

"Just us three then. Let's go in." Cheng says, having proper eye contact with me, and I take it as a sign of the end of our quarrel.

On the way in, I text Lan Zhan, deciding to not call to let him sleep.

<Me>
Morning, love.
Text me when you wake up. Just wanna know if you're alright.

When I check my phone during lunch I saw that Lan Zhan had left me on read, something he never does. This whole situation only worsened the strange gut feeling I had since morning.

After my last class, I figured that I should wait for Cheng to go home since Lan Zhan didn't show up. So I decided to go to the outdoor sitting area of the college, knowing that it's deserted at this hour. The perfect place to have some space to myself.

When I reach there, I realized that I wasn't alone. There was another person in the far corner. Someone whom I would recognize anywhere. As a natural reactor, my heart starts pounding inside my ribcage.

"Lan Zhan!" I call his name, causing him to jolt and look in my direction.

Why is he wearing his hood up? He hates doing it.

I hurriedly walk towards him. But even when I stand close to him, he doesn't meet my eyes. Instead, he had his head hung low as if he was ashamed to face me.

I move closer. "Lan Zhan?"

"Don't" I hear him mumble, but I gently tilt his head up.

What I see, breaks my heart.

His eyes were bloodshot and tears were flowing from them.

"Wei Ying, please." He mumbles again, in a broken voice.

I wrap my hands around his neck, softly pulling him close to me. Even though he refused earlier, he immediately gives into the embrace, burying his face on the crook of my neck. I kiss his ear as I stroke his back and I could feel him shaking with his quiet sobs.

What could possibly break him this much?

"What's wrong, love?" I ask without really expecting an answer.

"I'm sorry." He whispers, confusing me.

"You have done no wrong to me, Lan Zhan..." I softly reply and his hold on me tightens. "Can you tell me what happened?"

He abruptly pulls away when I ask it as if he realized something all of a sudden. "You should go." He says as he wipes his face with the back of his hand.

I smile at him tenderly, as I caress his cheek. "Of course not Lan Zhan. How can I leave you this way?" I reply, naturally thinking that he doesn't want me to see him like this.

"No, Wei Ying, you should go." He says. He sounded so desperate.

"Why are you saying that?" I ask, utterly confused. I link our hands as if I was afraid that he'll run away.

"Please. You shouldn't stay here." He says, avoiding my gaze again.

"What do you-"

I'm cut off by an enraged voice that came from somewhere behind me. "Wangji," the voice said, just two syllables but I noticed the effect it had on Lan Zhan.

I turn around to find the source. I was facing an aged man with a gray beard with an intimidating expression. For the way he held himself, I could say that he took pride in it.

"Uncle." Lan Zhan acknowledges him, and that's when I start connecting the dots.

He gives a disgusted look at our connected hands, but Lan Zhan doesn't let go.

"For God's sake, Wangji, how many times are you going to disobey me? Why are you disappointing me this much?" he roars.

"Mr. Lan-" I start.

"Do not speak to me, Wei Wuxian." He yells. . "What were you expecting to gain when you associated my nephew with such a tainted reputation? And you, Wangji, why would you be with him and let him spout poison to your head?"

At that, his gaze averts to me, as if I was the answer to it.

"Of course..." he lets out a humorless laugh. "What have you done to my nephew, Wei Wuxian? What kind of tricks did you play on him? You-" he mutters something. "I don't care what you do in bed, that's none of my business. But you'll be nowhere near my nephew." He says, releasing an anchor of dread into my gut.

I look at Lan Zhan, with what expectation I don't know. I could see how hard he was trying to fight back his tears. He tries to speak up. "Unc-"

"Don't you dare talk back to me Lan Wangji? If I didn't employ someone to keep an eye on you, I would never have known about the way you have been behaving. Appearing in bars? Having someone like him around you?" he says pointing at me. "Is this how you pay gratitude? I'm disappointed Wangji, utterly disappointed."

I fight the urge to punch him in the face. He was unbelievable. How could he say that he's disappointed when Lan Zhan had dedicatedly worked so hard to make him happy? "With all due respect, Mr. Lan. Don't speak about Lan Zhan that way."

"Who are you to instruct me Wei Wuxian?' he scoffs. "It must be so pleasurable for you to see his image ruining in front of your eyes. I've seen a lot of your kind. You just enjoy the perks given to you and make the others around you pay for your own faults."

I just keep looking at the ground, listening to what he has to say. Lan Zhan's grip around my hand tightens, trying to comfort me.

"The respect I have for Mr. Jiang is the only thing that stops me from complaining about your history to the Dean. Do not dare to come close to Wangji again. I don't want a thing like you around my nephew." He says. "Wangji, come. We have a flight in an hour."

That's when it starts sinking in.

Lan Zhan is leaving.

My vision becomes blurry with the tears that pop out because of the sudden realization. When I look at Lan Zhan I could see him being torn between two choices.

Seeing that he wasn't following him, Lan Qiren speaks up, not bothering to look back. "Wangji, if you don't come right now, don't come at all." With that, he leaves, ripping Lan Zhan apart even more. The pain, the fear, it was all evident in his eyes.

I knew I had to be the one to take the correct decision. And there was only one.

So I let go of his hand.

"Go," I say trying not to choke on my words.

I couldn't look at him. If I do, I will hold onto him, stopping him from getting away from me.

He comes close. "Wei Ying..."

"Please, Lan Zhan, don't make it harder," I beg. The sobs I fought back brakes free with those words. "Just go."

Hearing it, he flinches.

With an audible sigh, he closes the unbearable distance between us, clasping his lips on mine, kissing me fervently.

I understood his action. For the way the kiss lingered fiercely with no demands, for the way our hands stayed to ourselves without reaching for what we always craved for; I knew that this was his goodbye.

He reluctantly pulls away and brings his mouth close to my ear, whispering a few words. "I'll come back."

I didn't know what I felt. All I knew was that he was walking away from me out of my eyesight, out of my life.

I guess, for a moment I went crazy. Because after some time, I ran after him, just because I wanted to say that I'd wait for him too.

When I reach the gate, Lan Zhan was crossing the road with his uncle.

What I imagined would happen was the perfect moment where Lan Zhan will learn that I'll hold on to him. His worried expression would wash away, giving hope to his broken heart...

But what happened... It happened too fast.

My voice calling out his name, both of them pausing in the middle of the road, noticing a van speeding towards them, screaming at them to get away, Lan Zhan pushing his uncle aside, and-

The next thing I knew, I was kneeling on the road next to Lan Zhan, who was lying on a pool of his own blood.

Extra:

I hate it when the content warning becomes a spoiler.

Also, I want to say,
I don't think that Lan Qiren in the original story would do something of this sort. I think of him as a character who has believed in a certain set of principles for so long resulting to not know life beyond it. But, with time (and a load of patience to tolerate Wei Wuxian), he would understand. 
Let's say that this is a much more blinded version of Lan Qiren.

Aaand... Thank you for your votes and comments.
Till next time...