If this is what it feels like to meet a friend I loved, I would do it again and again. Just tell me a way to skip all the missing...

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The first time I came to Uncle Jiang's mansion after my parents' passing, I was confused by how much different it was from where I used to live. It was huge, way too huge for that boy in the skinny body, that the house looked empty.

That wasn't my first time visiting. I've come a few times with my parents—Uncle Jiang and dad were best buds—but I didn't know how high I felt on my father's shoulders until I came here all alone, knowing I'll never see them.

I knew Uncle wished well, this place was meant to be welcoming. But I couldn't stop wishing that one day I'd wake up to my mom's call, and I'll find dad in our small kitchen in his ridiculous apron humming to whatever the song playing on the radio, and let out a sigh of relief knowing it was all just a nightmare. I've been living in that nightmare anyway.

At first, Cheng didn't understand what happened to my parents. Uncle Jiang had told him that they left to a faraway place. "What do you mean they went? Where did they go?" His innocence gave it concrete just like that the first night I spent here, and I broke down before I could stop myself.

He'll never admit if I remind, Cheng let me share his bed that night and never mentioned my parents again. The next day, I didn't feel any better when I attended their funeral. But I've learned my lesson. Everything ends eventually. You just have to let go one way or another.

After all these years, each time I sit down on the large dining table, Uncle Jiang at the head, Aunt Yu and Shijie across Cheng and me, I realize how glad I am to be with them.

Cheng is living the payback of the secret lover joke, getting roasted by Uncle Jiang this time; who is refusing to believe that Cheng excused himself from a meeting at Jiang Corp because he had a project (that was the real reason). Shijie and I back up Uncle with amazingly false facts; this length is going to have us dealing with a grumpy Cheng for at least a week.

It's fun. It's good. I like how things are. Sometimes to the point I wonder if I actually deserve this.

"Were you out till late last night Wuxian?" All of a sudden Aunt Yu demands. I pause in my tracks. Cheng sighs inaudibly, enough to say told you so.

"Sort of," I say, after swallowing the bite. Etiquette. Glad I remember a bit of it. "We had to . . . continue the gig a bit longer than usual."

"They're trying to put a good word on a producer." Cheng covers me up.

"How do you know? Were you out too?" Aunt Yu points out, still indifferent. She isn't a lawyer for nothing.

"No." My turn to cover. "He had a project to complete."

"Qing told me when she phoned." Shijie buts in. "We just talked about it on the way."

This is why I love our circle.

Aunt Yu narrows her eyes, by now she probably would've figured out what we're doing. But this usually worked.

"Does that help?" Uncle Jiang asks. "Impressing the producer?"

"Yeah," I reply. "If we get a contract, we can release an original by end of next year at least. We just have to show him that we're worth the work."

"Tell us if you need anything, kid." Uncle Jiang says. "We're here to support you."

"Wait, you two are okay with that?" I ask, surprised.

Uncle Jiang expects just one thing from me. To work at Jiang Corp after graduation. Even though I'm not his son by blood, he always considered me as one. But this is more than what I can expect. Trouble follows me everywhere, and I tend to crash into it blindly. It has proven itself way too many times in the past.

That makes me anything but a good heir. The last thing I want is to be his downfall.

The only issue is, so far, Uncle didn't understand what I meant by that. If he did, he didn't care. "It's your dream after all," Uncle says, with a smile. It takes a second for me to actually process what I'm hearing.

I shift my gaze to Aunt Yu, and she adds, "You're still completing college as a business major."

"Yeah. No, that's great!" I reply. "I can make it work." I give her an idiotic smile and a thumbs up, which she decides to ignore.

I chirp a way too excited thank you with a mouthful, "Manners Wuxian!" Keeping my record, I haven't gone through a single family lunch without receiving Aunt Yu's death glare.

"Are you sure that this is what you want?" Cheng asks me when Uncle and Aunt were busy discussing Shijie's marriage.

"Yeah, I am," I reply.

Cheng only hums with an unreadable expression.

I can make it work, I said, but on Monday, I'm barely making it through the stat lecture after the weekend practice that went till late. I'm trying my best to keep up writing on my notebook, which right now doesn't even remotely look readable, constantly sipping from the bottled water Shijie gave me this morning well aware of my fate.

"If I hear you gulp once again, I'm going to shove you off the seat," Cheng warns next to me.

"Can't you see I'm suffering?" I mumble, voice unnaturally sharp from too much water, internally telling myself that if I want Uncle and Aunt to be pleased with my career choice, I've got to earn it.

I prop my head on my hand and stare at the blurry presentation. I manage to jot down the topic of the most recent slide . . . the rest of the lecture gets silent, all sorts of nonsensical thoughts taking their form, like I'm floating, so peaceful . . .

"See you tomorrow, Lan Zhan," I hear my voice say, and the little ghost walks away from me. Suddenly my world falls down, like, literally, I stop myself just before I hit the rock bottom . . . which was the table.

"Stay awake idiot," Cheng hisses, one hand holding my wrist—the one I was keeping my head on—and I realize what happened.

I recall the dream I had, and my drowsiness is effectively evaporated. Fucking hell, I did not just dream that. No. I. Did. Not.

The cafeteria is loud as usual, and Xingchen and Huaisang have reserved us a table, spotted today with the help of Huaisang's bright orange jacket. "Welcome, welcome," he sings—he sure was born a theater student—gesturing the two seats in front of him. I laugh taking a seat.

Xingchen takes music; I met him there because I minor in it—starting the band was a crazy idea that occurred to the two of us. Song already graduated, Ning is in high school. That left the four of us stuck here.

"Where were you during the weekend? You didn't even text." Xingchen asks Huaisang.

"Can you believe I was grounded?" he exclaims, all melodramatic. "My brother is a beast. He took my phone away. And made me study all weekend. Weekend plus Friday night. He didn't even let me watch my TV series." He makes some sobbing noises. "All because I missed just one project. Just one!"

Sang was practically raised by his brother since he was an infant. All we know is that his brother hated talking about their past and pissing him off was something we didn't dare to do.

"You should have completed it in the first place." Cheng comments.

"I'm eighteen plus you know," Huaisang dramatically says. "I have the right to not provide my grades to my guardian." He dramatically gasps. "I'm gonna sue him." He dramatically pulls his phone out. "I'm going to hire a lawyer right now."

"How are you going to pay? You live off him." Cheng points out.

"My miserable life." Huaisang lets out fake sobs, clinging onto Xingchen, who was laughing, enjoying the show.

The two of them go on arguing back and forth, and Xingchen tells me, "You're awfully quiet today. Which planet are you in?"

"I'm right here." I shrug, but Xingchen raises an eyebrow in my direction. I shrug again.

Xingchen drops it, and I decide to avoid the risk of repeating that conversation by not meeting his eyes. So my line of sight is limited to the crowd moving around outside the cafeteria. And I just . . . see him. The same straight back, elegant way of walking, pale clothes, black hair—I blink, and regretted it. Because when I open my eyes again, he's gone. I realize that it was just an imagination.

Fuck. I need to rest. "I'm bunking the next," I announce, checking the time on my phone—I had ten minutes before the next class.

"No you're not doing anything like that," Cheng is quick to answer, peeking at the screen over my shoulder. "Yeah, we should leave now."

Cheng drags me behind him through the hallway ignoring my whines. "Cheng, come oooon . . . Let me go."

"Shut up."

"Cheng . . ."

"No."

"Che—" and once again there he is, older and grown and handsome with sharp jawlines and dark silky hair, walking in the opposite direction. Suddenly, he locks his eyes on me, holding a curious burning gaze—I sharply look away because of a sudden adrenaline strike. And when I look back at him, he's still walking ahead like nothing ever happened.

Something is fucking wrong with me. Is my lack of sleep is finally starting to act up? "Hey, Cheng. That guy who just passed us, is he real?"

"What kind of a messed-up question is that?"

"Just have a quick look and tell me." He turns around with a dubious look. "The one in the white sweater. He's really there isn't he?"

"Seriously? Of course, he is."

"Holy shit," I mumble, I could literally hear my heartbeat, even the running blood in my veins. As if my whole being is charged with fucking electrostatic energy.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Cheng snaps.

"I don't fucking know," My voice comes out half an octave higher. This time Cheng has to physically move me ahead because I was frozen

Seriously, I don't fucking know.

After my last class, spotting him at the entrance of our department, I spot him again. "Go home without me," I mumble to Cheng and run after him.

"Lan Zhan," I call out near the gate. Maybe it'sinstinct, he turns around, and it all becomes clear. I grab his wrist. "It'sreally you."

Hope you enjoyed it...