Radhika's POV

I stared at the unwelcome diner in my house and I couldn't put in words how angry I felt at the moment. After breaking my family apart, he is going to enjoy his meal where we use to sit together to have dinner as a family. I have no clue where is Sam and Mariam aunty are and my heart breaks thinking if I will ever have what is lost.

I feel so lonely here with no one to talk to, I feel the silence in the air which I have never felt in this place and by silence I mean the silence within me. I have never grown so quiet in my entire life as much as now. When Arjun is around me, I don't feel purposeless or alone, he keeps bothering me in a good way or bad way but now I realise how much dependent I am upon him. It's like my life was monotonous and vain until he came like a storm and uprooted my whole life. I feel like a plant that was uprooted from its birth place and planted here.

I miss Sam and Mariam aunty too, I had grown so used to Sam and Arjun's constant bickering and Mariam aunt's pure love and affection. I lost my mother at a very young age and I never really had a mother but Mariam Aunty loved me like her own daughter  and she always use to side with me when Arjun use to bully me. Will my family ever be together again?! Will we have a meal together ever again like old times?!  Whole my life I longed for a family, a sense of belonging and when I finally had found it here in the most unexpected circumstances, my happiness was ripped away from me, all because of this man! I don't care what he had to go through all his life  we all have suffered and it was his mother's fault that she seduced a married man and took him away from his wife and his child.

"Are you just going to stare at your food?!"

I looked up at him only to find him staring at me back and giving me a playful smirk, the one that resembles my husband's smirk so much.

I kept quiet not really in mood to talk to him. I feel I miss Arjun more whenever I look at Veer. I choose not to look at him so maybe I will feel a little better. Hey, who am I kidding?! Am I ever going to forget Arjun?! He is like the air I breath and how can I stop thinking about him when I have a part of him growing inside me.

"So you are going to ignore me now?!"

I shook my head and took my spoon to eat. Having dinner with him has killed my appetite but I can't be selfish, can I?! Even if I don't feel like eating I will have to eat for this child.

"So you think he loves you?!"

How is it any of your business?!

I still kept quiet tuning him out completely as I don't want to give him the satisfaction that he affects me in any way.

"You know something, Radhika you are very gullible and by gullible I mean you see the world through Arjun's eyes. Of course maybe that's how he trained you to but take my advice, you are finally free and you can do anything you want. Get out of the house and explore the world. Do you really want to stay caged?!"

Get out, so you can do as you please that too in my house. I will never allow that and what is this thing about I see world through Arjun's eyes. Is he mad or what?! Trained?! Am I some pet to be trained?! Nonsense!

"You are very interested in me, aren't you?!" I asked him, gritting my teeth.

"I just feel sad for you. You're both young and beautiful but look at you, tied down with a baby at such a young age when you should be working towards better life. Women of your age are so ambitious and look at what he has done to you."

Tied down?! Am I tied down?! I am just 22 and if I were to be honest I didn't wanted a baby that soon. I would have liked to wait at least a good three to four years maybe. I never really thought about getting married because I always knew in my heart that one day I will be bethroned to another Mafia leader by my father. The man who didn't give me freedom to go to college without an army of bodyguards tailing behind, wouldn't have allowed me to marry out of love.

I wouldn't know what women of my age do because I wasn't allowed to know that. Working?! That thought never crossed my mind but I wanted to learn music in college but right after my graduation, I was locked in the house. I can play a violin and little bit of keyboard which Neil had taught me and I wanted to learn more. He was kind to me even though he knew who my father was and what he did for a living.

There was a time in my life when I use to think about all this and feel very depressed but then slowly the truth that there is no way out of this sinked inside me. I diverted my goals and decided to find happiness in my cruel reality. Of course Arjun did change a lot but he was still that man who didn't like his wife working, forget working he didn't like me stepping out of the house without him. Truth to be told, women born here rarely step out without their husband at the side. We aren't normal people, are we?! We are the Mafias, we are all tagged as the criminals, doesn't matter whether we did any crime or not.

"Did I put you in thought?! Good! I want you to think about your life from now on. Think about only yourself, Radhika."

He did put me in a deep, deep thought. Why he had to say all this?! When I had managed to blanked out all those thoughts from my mind, why he had to show me the mirror now?! I don't want to think all this when this should be the last thing on my mind. Arjun is not here and I can't be that vain person to think about what could have been my life if only I had eloped from this life, from my father years ago when I had a chance which Neil gave me but like a fool I turned his offer down.

I still remember that day very clearly where I could have changed the course of my life.

Flashback

My gaze scanned through the letter and the tickets in my hand. It had been a month since I was graduated and imprisoned in my own house. My phone was taken away as Father suspected something fishy between me and Neil. He even made me swore over my dead mother that I was pure and untouched. I had cried myself to bed when he wounded my heart with his accusations. I knew my virtue was of great importance especially because he wanted to marry me off t

My friend, Isha had come over to my house and it was only through her, this letter and the ticket had reached me. He was asking me to elope with him and he would take care of everything. My hands itched to pack my bag and leave but I knew if I do then there is no turning back. I knew we will get caught if not today then tomorrow or maybe years later but I knew we cannot hide for too long and the day they find us, he will lose his life because of me and I cannot do that to him. My life was a curse but I will not destroy his life for my selfishness. I burned the letter and the ticket to eliminate all the paths that could lead my father to Neil. I will not endanger his life, he has such a promising career ahead of him and I won't destroy it. I burned my dreams and that one last chance to achieve them.

I was snapped back to reality by Veer's voice as he rubbed salt over the wounds that I had got right from the time I was born.

"Even if you believe Arjun loves you then why would he try to change you?! Isn't love accepting the person the way they are?! You are just a pretty doll for him in my opinion."

How dare he?! He has no right to say that. Arjun loves me and I know that. Yes, his way of loving a person is different and it gets stiffling for the other person but if he loves you then he will not hesitate to die or kill for you. He might be controlling and even a male chauvinist but he has in no way made me feel unloved. He loves me, I know he does and I also know, how rare true love is in our world. For that love, I can give up anything because I just wanted to be loved more than anything.

"Enough! I am not saying anything that doesn't mean I can't say anything. So I am a pretty doll according to you?! Who told you that?! Oh yeah, your spy in our house, Lily! Did she ever tell you that she wanted to be that pretty doll?! Precisely Arjun's pretty doll. You know what both of you are jealous. She was jealous of me and you are jealous of Arjun!" I yell at him as I stare at him with fiery eyes.

"I am jealous?! Jealous of what, Radhika?!"

"Jealous of the fact that you were not born first! That you are not Arjun though you look like him! That you were born to some other woman and not Martha Mehra. Jealous of the truth that your own father loved him and not you. Jealous that he got everything and everyone's love and you got nothing! You are jealous that you don't have a Radhika who loves Arjun more than her life. You are jealous of Arjun and everything he has."

It's a joke that he is feeling sorry for me when he is living here as Arjun! Like seriously?!

"That's it! I have had it with you! You know what I am done reasoning with you. You are just a stupid puppet of Arjun and you don't understand and maybe you don't want to understand how he has ruined your life! I was giving you a chance to find yourself in all this. Okay! I accept I hate Arjun for the following reasons but tell me something, there was Veer, there was Arjun in this conversation where was Radhika?! Does she even exist?! What has she done?! Does anyone give her credit for sacrificing herself to become Arjun's pretty doll?! What is she doing with her life when she could have done so much better had she given a chance?!" He stormed out leaving me alone with my thoughts that pushed my mind into a dark place.

In spite of everything, in spite of the bitterness in my heart for him, I have to begrudgingly accept that he is right! Where is Radhika in all this?! I have saturated to only Arjun's wife and that has become my identity. I love Arjun and I know he does too but did he change me to love me?! Oh God! Why he has put all this things in my head?! Didn't I had enough already?! Why is this happening?! Why am I thinking all this when I should be only thinking about Arjun?!

Pretty doll?! I never wanted to be anyone's pretty doll. I know what's a pretty doll. Pretty doll is the one who is pleasing to the eye, the one who lives life by her owner's rules. Am I one?!

No, Radhika, Stop! He is messing up with your mind for his benefit. He wants you to stray and cheat so he can rub it in Arjun's face that he lost that one girl who he truly loved. I will never let this man sway me away from my morals and values.

Arjun's POV

I sat in the dark watching the beautiful moonlight and the soothing music that Mathew played on his violin filled the air. I personally like him playing and he plays well too.

As he completed, he looked at me and smiled," You know your wife plays well too. She has a very soft voice, she should learn music."

"Yeah maybe when I meet her, I'll ask her if she wants to. She can learn whatever she wants as long as she stays inside the house."

Yeah, I have no problem if Radhika wants to learn something as it is she is alone in the house with only Sam and Mariam giving her company. My only condition is that the baby should be at top on her priority list and I should be second other things can follow.

"I can teach her if you want." He offered with a big toothy grin

Of course why won't you?! You'll flirt with her more and if any time is left after flirting you'll teach her in that time.

"In your dreams. If someone's going to teach her then that person is going to be a female." I make myself clear.

"You know I don't have a death wish to hit on her."

You won't be alive if you had any such ideas.

"Why take a chance?! I don't like my wife getting friendly or even comfortable with other men." I stated in a firm tone.

Wives should be kept away from jobs and other men because both the things are like viruses which crash the entire system. I like my wife barefoot and pregnant in my bedroom, I would have said kitchen but my wife doesn't know to cook.

"Does the rule apply to you?!" He asked me like a nosy neighbour that he is.

Well I don't talk to other women so Radhika has nothing to worry about. I am kind of bored of those plastic dolls now and who will spare them a glance when I have a real beautiful doll.

"I have had my fun and I have sown my wild oats for as long as I can remember. I have finally found a girl I want to stay forever with and who I am very proud of." I reply honestly

"You must have made a century right?!" He taunted asked me.

"I am not replying to that." I say trying to reflect my displeasure in my tone.

I don't want to tell him but Radhika is my 102 but this girl owns me completely. I know in my heart and my soul that 103 will never happen. Sometimes I do think, how life would have been if I had waited and not made a century with all those women, I didn't give two shits about but I will not whitewash my deeds because I enjoyed fucking different women at that time. Sex has always been great and almost therapeutic for me but sex with Radhika is beyond everything I have had in my past. I can never touch another woman after her, never!

"So you have?!"

Fucking ass! He won't give up, will he?! Should he be talking about my score when he, himself is a whoredog!

"Yeah but let's not talk about it. It feels wrong now."

Yeah it does feel wrong now especially when I am going to be a father but I can't change my past, can I? When I did all those things I was a coldhearted callous young man who didn't had anyone to answer to neither did I want anyone but if I were to be honest now, I could spend my days with ease but I needed a good fuck to pass those lonely nights because my nightmares clawed me if I was alone. Also I am a young red blooded man, what else will I do with girls, paint their nails with nail polish?!

"Did you ever think that you will love someone?!"

His question interrupts my stream of thoughts. Love?! I fucking hated the word with every fibre in my body. For me it was like love kills you. My mother loved my father and he did too until his love wore off and he fell in love again with that whore. I had made my heart a stone because I didn't wanted to end up like my mother. Had she been with my father that day she would have been alive today but fucking bastard threw her out of his life and house both! Why?! Because he fell out of love!

I kept away from love never did I let any woman touch my cold heart because I believed nothing good ever comes out of love but when I looked into those brown eyes filled with all the innocence of entire world, I felt I would hand over my heart to the owner of those eyes in a moment but I just didn't know it at that time. I still cannot trust love fully but I trust Radhika still I will take all the measures so that my marriage doesn't end up like my parents marriage. I have seen people fake in front of the world that they are happily married but reality is that both the husband and wife are dining out side dishes along with the main course.

Mathew finds me lost in thought so he throws the cube at me which he was playing with a while ago. Though I was lost but still my senses are awake so I caught it with my hand before it could hit my face.

"Are you fucking crazy?! What was this for?!" I scowl as I throw the cube back at him which he pitches.

"You did not answer my question so I had to bring you back to earth." He grins.

"Have you forgotton I am still your Highness?! Don't push me."

"I know you won't do anything to me because I am the only friend you have right now."

"Yeah whatever sails your boat. Just so you know a King has no friends and he can't trust anyone in Mark's words." I state as I looked him in the eye.

Of course I trust Mathew and he is a friend who will lay down his life for me and also slice his heart out if that's my demand. I have people for whom loyalty means more than their life but I was taught that a king is always alone, no one fights his battles for him, he should always be on guard and he should trust with his heart and untrust with his mind and if I were to be very honest with myself I don't trust anyone completely. No one!

"You don't trust me?! Ouch! I am so hurt." He made a hurt face.

"Yeah cry those crocodile tears now will make your acting look real." I taunted.

"You didn't answer my question."

"Which one?!"

"Did you ever thought you would love someone?!"

"Fuck No! You should be the last person asking me that when you know what I was like."

"Yeah you remember that guy bashed you for sleeping with his girlfriend and your reply was just epic. I still can't believe you said that to him that too in front of the whole college."

Fuck that moment was just priceless. Yeah I hooked up with his girlfriend or ex girlfriend, I don't know but its not like I forced or blackmailed her, she was a good lay though won't deny that but the other day he walked up to me in the college campus and started yelling to my face. I lost it as no one gets in Arjun's face and no one shows me their middle finger but I couldn't hit him as violence wasn't allowed in college campus so I said very loudly that does he need any tips for sex, I can give him so next time the girl won't switch to other. If he needs my reference than he should ask his ex how fucking good I was last night. That was a slap in his face without me touching him. The guy didn't show his face to anyone let alone me after that.

I burst out laughing," You are an asshole! I fucking need to concentrate on the plan and you are distracting me."

He is seriously trying his level best to lift my mood so that I don't pine for Radhika that much.

"First answer my question."

"I knew I would hire a surrogate to carry my baby when I had to produce a heir otherwise I would be overthrown by my people but no I did not think I would ever love someone." I replied honestly.

"Do you think she loves you?!" He asked me in a doubtful tone.

Love?! I know she has accepted me and its but obvious from her behaviour towards me. She lets me love her the way I want and by love I just don't mean sex. She doesn't have a choice because what I love is mine and only mine! After all this years its for the first time I felt that empowering rush of blood in my veins, the feeling of loving someone madly to the point that you can kill for them, this was the feeling that I had or rather have for my mother and now I feel the same for my Radhika. She cannot fathom how much I love her and how she is both lucky and unlucky at the same time. Lucky because I am fiercely loyal and by that I mean I will kill each person who talks shit about her and cut each hand that even points a finger at her, scoop every eye out that glares or ogle at her unlucky because I am not really a nice person and definately not a good man, I will place her at the top where she'll rule alongside me but if she pisses me off or does something that fucks with my mind then she and I both know that I am not much of a forgiving man.

Of course I try really hard to not hit her as it really hurts later to see those ugly marks marring her beautiful skin but sometimes I have my way with her to drill it inside her head who is in control and she should behave herself. I haven't really hit her since we got to know she is pregnant and I have promised myself to just walk away when I lose my shit.

"I don't know and frankly it doesn't matter. My love is enough for both of us and I did not give her a choice, did I?!" I anwered him.

"Radhika is an ideal girl if you ask me but you need to loosen that grip on her." He tells me as he stares right in my eyes.

That is a very true statement. She is an ideal girl and will always be. Despite my anger, despite my cruelty, and despite the

"Loosen?! She is ideal because I keep her grounded. Had she been exposed to the world outside, she would have been spoilt and perhaps like the girls you and I took to the apartment to fuck. She is ideal because she doesn't know a lot and it's always better to not know then know a lot. I love her innocence the most in her and I will never let her lose it and you pretty well know how women are treated like broodmare in our world."

Radhika is naive because she has not seen the world, She has not seen the night life of girls of her age, She has not seen the selfishness of people and how bad the world is to you if you are not smart enough. I am not saying she is not but she is too innocent and thinks from her heart. She is like a ray of hope in this dark, selfish world which I don't want to share with anyone else. Its mine, all mine! I will never show her the world outside and her world will always revolve around me.

"You know you would have never been able to impress her or maybe convince her to marry you had you not used force." Mathew points out.

He thinks I don't know this?! I knew it from the very first day itself but then I didn't wanted to marry for love, did I?! I married her for revenge and couldn't help myself from falling in love with her. Mathew is so fucking right she would have never married me but hey, she did say she found me very handsome at the airport when we met first.

"I know but then she told me she found me very attractive at the airport where we first met." I told him with a shy smile.

He shook his head,"I find sunny leone hot but do I want to marry her?! No, right she would have never married you take my word."

He is fucking right, any girl in her right mind if she knows what I am then she will run for the hills.

"I guess you're right. I am the perfect example of what good girls should stay away from but I always have my way." I smirk.

Radhika would have been mine even if she would have rejected me. I always get what I want and she is no different. The thing with me is that I can't take defeat, it kills me from inside. When I was ten, I lost in a game of cricket with one of the kids of neighbour and I challenged him again for a match and I hit the ball in such a way that it struck his head! Of course I took him to our house and father called the doctor and he was nursed back to health. I don't want to remember what Father did with me after that. Its too painful even to think about it.

"Good girls?! Make it all girls, dude. You shouldn't have a daughter because you don't know what the fuck to do with daughters and what you know is very inappropriate."

Daughter?! Fuck, that is very scary! I know I can play and run with my son and teach him everything but what the fuck do you do with little girls?! If I ever have a daughter, I would kill all men who try to even hit on my little girl and she is not even born yet.

One thing I know is that Radhika wants a daughter in future and I read her well. I want only sons but then if we have a daughter then of course I will love her to no end. I will keep her away from this selfish world like a precious treasure and the man she marries will stay in my house where I can keep an eye on him. Marry?! Fuck! No! I don't ever want my daughter to marry and she is not even born yet.

"Lets not talk about it. Who wants to tempt the fate?!"

"So you don't want one?!"

"No fuck no its fucking hard taking care of daughters and I want a long and stress free life." I groaned.

"Imagine you having one that looks just like Radhika. She'll be one pretty girl if it happens."

Fuck! Thats insane! My daughter, a splitting image of her mother like I am of my father. If she is like my Radhika then I will have to always be on guard. One thing is for sure no talking to guys and she'll marry the guy I choose for her and that guy will stay with us.

"Yeah and I will have to lock her up to keep the fuckers away." I give him a smug look

"You might even build the highest tower and put her on top of it with an army guarding the tower."

"That's a good idea." I smirked.

"Dude you are so full of shit, should we discuss the plan again?!" He asked me in a serious tone.

"Yeah sure, you know once this is over, I will take Radhika out to some good place. She deserves a break more than anything."I said as I leaned back closing my eyes.

Fuck! I miss her so much. Where the fuck is that informer?! I want to see her pictures, I have framed all of which he has send us and kept them near my bedside so the first thing I see when I open my eyes is her beautiful face. Baby just some time more and we will be together, I know you are miserable, I am too but this too shall pass that too soon. Just don't lose hope, baby, don't give up on me, don't give up on us. I hope you are taking care of yourself without me. I am fucking going to tear that fucker apart that to with bare hands!

I just hope and pray my Radhika is fine, please God take care of her and my baby. Don't fail me this time, Lord, not this time. I will lose my mind if something happens to her and it will all be my fault because I fucking trusted that whore even though my gut advised me against it. That fucking whore, I wish I had thrown her out of my house the day she tried to drive a wedge between me and my wife but I was so fucking stupid that I forgot that a King should never let his guard down.

To be continued......