Chapter Eight:

Ryder O'Connel

"Your heart knows things that your mind can't explain."

Maya Granger

I was smiling like a fool as soon as I spotted a certain couple. It has been over a week since then, and they have still been the talk of the school. I overheard whispers both of approval, and jealousy as I walked through the crowd of students, making my way over to them, their backs facing me as they held hands.

"Good morning, you two love-birds!" I greeted Taylor and Lincoln, grinning from ear-to-ear.

They turned around at the same time, blushing and smiling. Taylor momentarilly let go of her boyfriend's hand, and greeted me with a hug.

Ever since that fateful day that they got together, Taylor and Lincoln became the new part of our little group, and we all clicked, and it felt as if we have been friends for with her for a long time.

I returned the hug, and when we pulled away, Taylor gave my shoulder a playful shove. "It's been a week, Maya. Wipe that smile off your face."

"I can't," I giggled. "You're my OTP, there's nothing I can do about it."

Taylor's blush deepened, before she smiled mischieviously. "What about you? You and Ryder seem closer than ever." She winked suggestively at me.

I chocked on air, before squeaking, "Wha-Whaaat? No way. We've been just the same."

"Uh-huh. Yeah right," Taylor rolled her eyes.

"We really have..." I weakly attempted to convince her, but the way she was warily watching me told me I was fooling no one; not even myself. I inwardly let out a sigh. Ever since that fateful day that Taylor and Lincoln got together, I myself made a self-discovery-well, more like, accepted something about myself, but of course I ain't admitting to that anytime soon. I have fallen for Mr. Bad Boy, aka Ryder O'Connel himself, and since then, I didn't bother much about Ryder's PDA. I wouldn't escape his arms whenever he'd hug me, or when he'd hold me close to his body.

In fact, I even started returning the gestures, and play along whenever he called me his.

It shocked him at first, along with the others, but they gradually got used to it, and Ryder and I had indeed become closer. Sure, it hasn't been all good for my heart, but accepting these new found feelings made me feel good; like I was on a constant high, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

"Speaking of, have you guys seen him?" I asked, suddenly remembering the weird text I got from him that morning.

"No, why?" Lincoln answered, wrapping an arm around Taylor's waist.

"Something just seemed off about him this morning." I replied thoughtfully.

"How so?" Taylor asked.

"Look at this," I pulled my phone from my jean's pocket, and showed the couple the text I received from Ryder.

I watched as their brows furrowed in confusion. I replayed the text in my head, memorizing word for word of what he texted, since I read over at least twenty times.

Sorry, couldn't pick you up. I'll see ya later.

In sync, Taylor and Lincoln looked to me for answers, and I showed them another text from him. One from a few days ago.

Mayaaa!!! T^T i couldn't pick u up! My truck has a flat tire...so sorry!!!

P.S. I love you! >3<

"Wow..." Taylor said in amazement upon seeing the difference. "Talk about a massive mood swing..."

"Maybe something came up?" Lincoln suggested, after I put away my phone. "Did you ask?"

"I was tempted," I said, "but...something about his text...it pretty much warned me not to reply, ya know?"

He nodded, "Yeah, I understand. So, what did you reply?"

"I said, Okay, see ya in school, but he didn't say anything after that."

"That is odd," Taylor said.

"What is?" A familiar voice asked from behind me, before a heavy arm was perched on top of my head.

"Ryder's text," Lincoln answered Ashton, just as Sakura came up next to him. "What text?" She asked, looking between the four of us.

"Ryder's," Ashton answered, "What's the text about, anyway?"

I explained again what happened, and both Ashton and Sakura agreed that it was indeed strange.

"I wonder what's up..." Ashton muttered under his breath. Then, a look of realisation came upon his face, and I immediately questioned him.

"What is it, Ash?"

He looked to me with furrowed brows, then opened his mouth as if to say something, only to close it again and shake his head. "Nothing."

Just as I was about to push him for an answer, the bell decided to rang then, signaling the start of another day full of studying. I should've felt happy, ecstatic even that I will be learning something new, but the fact that Ryder obviously wasn't at school yet, and was acting all weird, only made me worry.

Where is he?

Is he okay?

What happened?

Is he with another girl?

The last thought made me cringe every time, but all these questions plagued my mind throughout the whole day, and I was unable to concentrate.

I couldn't concentrate.

He invaded every inch of my mind, and it was scary; truly, truly scary.

"What are you doing spacing out for, Maya?" Ashton asked, after I bumped into his back for the third time that afternoon. School had just finished, and the whole gang-minus Ryder (that idiot, where is he?!) was walking down the hallway out to the parking lot. Ashton had offered me a lift home along with Sakura, who is actually a frequent rider in his cherry-red Mustang GT.

"You are a real idiot, Ashton," Sakura stated, her arms crossed at her chest.

"Huh?!" Ashton gave her an annoyed look. "Wanna fight, Sakura?"

Sakura clicked her tongue, matching Golden Boy's look with her own. "She's obviously worried about, Ryder, and if you hadn't picked up on her vibe after all this time already, then you deserve to be called an idiot, baka! Just tell her what you know already!"

"I don't know anything!" Ashton defended, looking conflicted between two emotions.

"You definetly know something, baka!" Sakura shouted, giving Ashton a painful looking punch to the back of his head.

"Ow! What the hell?!"

Ashton got right up in Sakura's face, glaring, while he held the back of his head. "You wanna fight? I won't hold back just because you're a girl and my precious friend!"

"Alright, break it up!" I pushed their faces away from each other, then Lincoln took hold of Ashton, while Taylor took hold of Sakura. "Seriously, you two get all worked up about the smallest of things! What are you, an old married couple?"

Due to their bickering, I didn't realize we had reached the outside of the school building, until I saw the parking lot right across from where we stood. I froze upon seeing a familiar black truck, with its owner leaned up against it, his hands stuffed in his pockets as he stared at the ground.

Ryder.

As if hearing his name, he slowly looked up, and our eyes met. I immidiately knew something was wrong. His eyes didn't have their usual spark, and when he smiled, I can tell it was fake.

"It's Ryder," Ashton said in bewilderment from behind me, but I barely heard his voice, as I speed walked towards the aforementioned male.

"Hey," he said in a soft voice as I walked up to him.

"Hey..." I breathed out.

"Is everything...alright?" I asked cautiously, after a few seconds.

One side of his mouth tilted upwards in a half-smile, and that was when I noticed how tired he looked. His eyes were bloodshot, and there were dark circles under them. He looked lifeless, and it scared me.

He opened the door to the passenger side which he has been leaning on, then said, "Let's go for a ride."

Without a question, I climbed in, and Ryder shut the door after me. I watched with worry through the windshield as he walked over to the driver's side, and got in. I continued to study him as he reached over to the ignition where the key was already in, and started the truck. The engine purred to life, and in silence, he shifted the gear from nuetral, to drive, and skillfully manuevered us out of the school parking lot, just like all those times he'd give me a ride home from school. Except this time, he was not his usual self, and it bothered me; hurt me even, that I don't know what's hurting him.

As he got on the highway, he took my hand in his that wasn't on the steering wheel, and interlaced our fingers, slightly squeezing.

Under normal circumstances, I would've blushed, and pulled away, but nothing was normal at the moment, so I didn't make any move to take back my hand. He needed some sort of physical contact, I could tell, and I could also tell he felt somewhat comforted by the touch from whatever was bothering him, and my heart skipped a beat at the thought that I was at least able to ease some of his pain.

However, when an image of him holding another girl at a time like this entered my mind, I felt sick to the stomach, and I gripped his hand tighter.

Ryder felt the gesture, and he gave me a quick glance with wide eyes, before looking back to the road. In return he squeezed back, as if reasurring me; as if he had just seen my thoughts. And just with that, all my worries were thrown out the window.

***

Some thirty minutes later, Ryder got off the highway, and unto a gravel road, lined with nothing but trees, trees, and more trees, the afternoon sun filtering through the leaves, giving the lonely road a magica feel.

I rolled down my side of the window with my free hand, and took a deep breath of the woodsy scent that came in with the cool wind. It was very calming.

There was no music playing this time, and the only sound the was heard then was the crunching of gravel under the truck's tires, and the chirping of birds; the music of the forest.

After making sure it was safe, I stuck my head out of the window, and looked up. The sight of the sun's rays shinning throught the green leaves looked so enchanting, I wished I had my camera to capture the beautiful scene.

I smiled, and closed my eyes, enjoying the moment for a second longer, before bringing my head back into the truck, only to find Ryder giving me side-way glances with a genuine smile. The kind that lit up his handsom face, and beautiful eyes. It made me smile back, undescribable joy bubbling up inside of me at the welcomed sight.

"What?" I asked with a small chuckle.

Ryder shook his head, "Nothing. You just looked so happy..."

"I am," I replied, giving his hand another squeeze, letting him know that I was happy about more than one thing.

After some time, the trees slowly disappeared, giving way to a fairly large clearing of green plains. My eyes widened when I saw the lake that stood in the middle, with a large oak tree standing next to it. From one of its branches hung a tire swing.

The gravel road ended, and Ryder followed the tire-tracked path, lined by tall, green, grass that lead us straight to the lake.

Ryder parked his truck right next to the oak tree that had to be atleast a hundred years old, judging by its size; maybe even more. We both got out, and met at the front of the truck, our hands automatically finding each others. With a blanket under his arm, Ryder lead me over to a dock I had just noticed. Tied to it was a small, two-person paddle boat. Ryder set the blanket on the edge of the dock, where he sat down, then patted the spot next to him.

I sank down next to him, as he took off his signature leather boots, followed by his socks, then he rolled up his pant's to a few inches above his ankles, before dipping his feet into the lake. I followed suit, slipping off the sandals I wore, and folded my jeans up to just below my knees, then slipped my feet under the cool water. I shivered at the temperature, but got used to it after a few seconds of swishing my feet back and forth.

I could feel Ryder watching me, but instead of looking to him, I lifted my face up to the afternoon sun, closing my eyes, and took a deep breath. A comfortable silence enveloped us, and after a few more minutes of peaceful silence, I spoke up, "Is there any fish here?"

"Yep," Ryder answered, "Me and my dad used to fish here a lot. We got some good catches. I remember when I was about ten, we caught a fairly large bass, one of the largest we have caught. Mom was sitting here, on this dock, watching us and cheering us on."

At the mention of his mom, I turned to look at him. Ryder stared out at the lake with a wistful smile.

"This was her favorite place to come too," he continued. "We'd come out here all the time on the fourth of Julys. We also camped out here a lot during the summer. Apparently, the reason mom loved this place so much was because this is where dad took her on their first date, and where he proposed to her." His smile widened. "They had most of their dates here also after getting married."

I reached for his hand that was gripping the edge of the dock, slipping my fingers through the spaces of his. His grip loosened, and he sighed before turning over his hand, to hold mine properly. But, his gaze remained on the lake.

"You know, when I got into fights, I didn't do them for the fun of it. The first time I got into an actual fist fight was because I was defending this kid from my class from the school bullies. I won, but I got suspended for a week."

I smiled at the almost-exact same punishment we got.

"I think I was around...twelve when that happened. The principal called my parents, but only my mom was able to come. Dad couldn't get away from work, so mom took a quick break from the hospital to come and get me. She was a nurse, ya' know. She came to the principal's office, listened to what he had to say, said sorry for my behaviour, and made me say sorry as well, then left the school with my hand in hers. She was calm all through the process, and even smiled at me when we exited the school. On our way home, I asked her why she wasn't angry. She didn't reply right away. Instead, she pulled over, turned to me with a warm smile, took both my bruised hands into her own, then said, Because I know my son didn't get into a fight looking for trouble. I know my son had a good reason for his actions.

I was so touched by her faith, her love for me, I started crying then and there, bawling my eyes out as I tried to explain why I fought. All the while, she held me close to her chest, running a warm hand through my hair. When I calmed down some, she said, I am so proud of you, Ryder. For standing up for that kid. She pulled away, then held my face with both hands, and looked me straight into the eyes. Continue to do what you know is right. No matter the means, protect those who are precious to you, no matter the price. Mommy is cheering you on."

I watched in sadness as a tear fell down Ryder's cheek, followed by another, and another, until they continously flowed like a waterfall.

My heart went out to him, and I scooted closer to him, then wrapped my arms around his shoulders in an attempt to provide any sort of comfort I can. It was apparent then and there he was mourning his beloved mother. My own eyes started to water, as he leaned into me, his shoulders shaking.

"I formed a group later on when I was around fourteen," he explained, once he had calmed down some. "Some were older than me, but didn't mind our age difference because we all had one goal; we were dedicated to protect those who were bullied, and to shelter those who had gotten on the wrong path. Our group's reason for existing often got us in trouble with street gangs, but no matter the consequences, we always managed to pull through, to show people our resolve to do what we know is right.

Of course not everyone understood us, but I didn't care. Mom was always there whenever I'd come home all banged up, greeting me with a smile, and a kiss on the cheek, before she'd patch me up. A lot of people told her to do something about me, to do something about her "trouble child," however, she'd just smile at them like she does to everyone, warm and kindly, then say, My son isn't causing me any problems, so I don't think I have to do anything about him."

"She sounds like a wonderful mother," I said, as I continued to play with his hair.

"She was." Ryder replied, before moving from my arms, to rest his head on my lap. He laid on his back and covered his eyes with his arm. "When she was battling cancer, I continued to battle for what I stood for. And whenever we'd save someone new, I would always go to visit mom and the hospital and tell her about it. She loved hearing my stories. Sometimes, even the gang came with me. She acted as their mother as well."

"So...the gang you created...was the one you left?" I asked, as Ryder took hold of one of my hands again.

He nodded. "Yeah...and I left when mom died."

"Why?" I asked softly, afraid that I might be overstepping some bounderies.

"I felt empty." He answered, "I didn't feel like much of a hero once mom died. I knew standing up for the weak was a good cause, however, without mom greeting me like she always did, without her touch, her words...it all felt meaningless to me." He took a deep breath. "Today...she died today, two years ago."

Silence fell on us as I let all the information settle into my mind. I understood that Ryder's mom played a big part in his life, but what I got from all of it was that Ryder isn't the badboy I thought him to be. He's just a boy trying to make a difference in the world; a good difference, and I felt my feelings for him grow stronger.

Without thinking much about it, I slowly reached for the arm that was covering his eyes, then just as slowly removed it, his red-rimmed eyes watching me as I placed his arm on his stomach. Then, I slowly bent down, tucking away some of my hair behind my ear and holding it there as I placed a soft kiss on his forehead.

I let my lips linger on that spot for a little longer, before pulling away, and stared into Ryder's shocked, midnight blue orbs. I smiled, "I'm pretty sure your mom is proud of you no matter what you decided to do. Whether you continue to defend the weak, or simply enjoying the life you have right now. I'm sure she's watching you with that same smile on her face; that warm, and kind smile."

I watched as Ryder's eyes filled with tears again, my own doing the same. He let go of my hand that he was holding, then reached up for me, wrapping his arms around my neck as he brought me back down to him. I thought he was gonna kiss me then, and slighty panicked, but instead, he buried his face in my neck, and said against my skin, "I love you."

My face became hot with a blush, and my pulse quickened, as my stomach came alive with butterflies.

I don't know how long we stayed like that, but I was sure Ryder repeated the words I love you, more than ten times. And it made my heart skip more than one beat.

It was then and there that I realised just how much Ryder really loves me. It was then that I realised he wouldn't give out his love just to anyone. It was then that I realised just who Ryder O'Connel is.

***

*baka: idiot, fool in Japanese.