BEXLEY TURNER

"NASH, WAKE UP," I whisper and lightly shake him. He's supposed to go over to Hayden's today and he won't get up. I've been trying for the last half an hour. A part of me thanks him for fighting me today. I don't know how I'm going to be able to get through being around Hayden all day after what happened a few nights ago. I hurt him again and I'm mad at myself for putting him through more pain.

"No," he whines, cuddling into my arm.

"Yes," I playfully mock. "Up." I lift him up from underneath of his armpits and stand him up on the floor. He pouts at me and I ruffle his brown hair before getting him a change of clothes out of his suitcase.

"Mama, why are you upset?" He asks me while I help him put on a dark purple sweater and khakis. Catching me off guard, I stop what I'm doing and look at him.

"I'm not-"

"Yes, you are. Your face is frowning and you almost ripped my shirt. That's mad." His crossed arms make me roll my eyes. So stubborn.

Like father, like son.

"I'm frustrated, darling," I tell him honestly.

"Tell me," he begs, pulling on my sweatshirt that says California on it. One thing I didn't miss about Oregon was the snow.

"When you're older. And you're not my therapist, Nash," I laugh and help him slip his small converse on his feet. When he ties the laces, we exit the bedroom and walk towards the front door.

"Was dad being mean?"

"No."

"If it's because I dropped my Ipad in the sink, I'm sorry." His big, blue, apologetic eyes look up at me and I smile, crouching down to his level.

"Nash, I'm mad at myself. When you're older and you fall in love with a beautiful woman or handsome man, you'll understand." I kiss his forehead and grab my car keys from the coat rack before putting on my coat and giving Nash his.

"Chrissy, we're heading out!" I call out and wait a few seconds for her or Jared to respond. With the wedding in only a few more days, they've been super stressed and pushy, even snappy. Some time out will be good for me and them. Hopefully, they can use this free time to fuck each other's brains out.

"Drive safe and use protection!" She yells back and I scoff.

"Back at you!" I giggle to myself and Nash looks at me curiously.

Just wait, kid.

"Don't count on it!" She laughs loudly from the kitchen. "But seriously, Bex!"

"Be quiet!" I flip her off when she walks into the living room, a disheveled Jared following after her.

❄︎

Hayden's apartment door swings open and my breath gets caught in my throat. He stands there, dressed in grey sweatpants and a tight Nike t-shirt that hugs his sculpted chest. I gulp when his soft eyes meet mine. He smiles at Nash and nods at me. Ouch.

"Hey, buddy!" He greets Nash and picks him up, placing him on his shoulders.

"Hi, Dad, can I play on the game?" Nash asks him, pulling on Hayden's hair and looking down at him.

"Sure, bud." He places Nash down and he runs to the TV. "Hi, Bex." Hayden gives me a small smile, barely hiding the slight disappointment in his loving eyes.

Bex, not beautiful...

"You-" I go to ask him why he didn't call me beautiful, but stop myself. "Hey, morning." I follow them into the apartment and take a seat on Hayden's black, leather couch. Nash turns on Hayden's Playstation 5 and puts the Minecraft disc in before sitting in front of the large, flat-screen TV. Hayden sits next to me and places his hand on my thigh, squeezing it and looking at me.

"How was the hangover?" He asks, gazing into my eyes.

"Oh, you know, amazing," I grin, not meeting his eyes. Hesitantly, I place my hand on top of the one that's resting on my thigh. I use my pointer finger to trace the back of his hand while he stares at the side of my face.

"I'm sure it was," he chuckles. "You know, I could have driven you home, Bex. You didn't have to freak out and leave."

"I know. It's just so hard not being able to be as intimate as we were all those years ago, Hay. I miss being able to kiss you without having to stop before things go too far. And I know I'm the reason that our relationship is fucked up. But, I miss this, I miss us." I tell him, frowning as I mindlessly watch Nash play his video game.

"Who says you have to miss anything? We don't need anyone's approval to be together. We're both adults, Bex. Who cares if things go further? You're still the same woman I'm in love with. And our relationship isn't fucked up. We both made mistakes. I wasn't clear about wanting kids and you felt trapped, It's okay. You're here now and that's all that matters." Hayden caresses the side of my face and stares into my eyes, the disappointment once in his eyes, completely gone and replaced with this soft, loving look.

"Kiss me already."

And he does, slowly connecting our lips. My hand moves to grip the back of his head, deepening our kiss that's slowly inching towards heated. My heart jolts when he moans against me, pulling away and looking me in the eyes.

"We're finishing this someday," he tells me, his voice rough and breathless while he rubs my cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Thanks for reading!