Maggie -

It's the final day of Jack's book tour and I haven't spoken to him the entire time he's been in Seattle.

No matter how many times I've tried to reach him, he just won't answer my calls.  It wasn't hard to figure out he was ignoring me, considering after the first few calls they all went straight to his voicemail.

When the maid finally arrived and granted us our freedom, Nick and I went searching for my phone. It didn't take long to find it, smashed to pieces in the alley next to my old club.  It wouldn't turn on, but even if it did the glass was shattered and I'd probably have cut up my fingers if I attempted to use it.  I've ordered a new phone and unfortunately even though I paid extra for fast shipping, it doesn't arrive until today, again, the day Jack arrives.

I sigh, letting out the breath of air I've been holding while checking the tracking info. It looks like it won't come until this evening, and I'm not even planning on being here.

Today is also the day I travel to Prescott and finally meet my father.  Jack asked me to delay meeting him one final time so I wouldn't have to face this alone, but I won't delay again regardless of what's going on in our personal lives.

I'm almost more anxious to see Jackson than I am my father.  I wonder how he spent all weekend, if he continued on with his book tour or if he gave up all together.  He must be furious thinking that I hung up on him to spend the night with Nick in peace.  That's the only logical explanation I can see him coming up with.  

I admit I might be slightly overdramatic at times but it was a silly fight.  It doesn't even merit enough importance to be called a fight.  It was a tiff, an irritation, but now it's completely blown out of proportion. 

I should have been nervously thwarting away Jack proposing I send nude pictures or experiencing phone sex for the first time this weekend. I knew it would suck not having him close enough to touch, but we still could have made it work.  I shouldn't have been left here crying over the unknown. 

Jack's penthouse is spotless on account that I obsessively cleaned every nook and cranny to keep my mind busy.  I must have gotten that from my mother, whenever she was stressed the house always looked immaculate. 

I've organized his pantry, cleaned out his closet, even sorted his enormous collection of books by author, but nothing worked. No matter how tired I was I couldn't sleep and the few times I actually managed to drift off, I awakened minutes later drenched in sweat searching for Jackson. 

My nightmares have been relentless since he left, my father was replaced by Jack and I lose him every time.  I'm left running in circles trying to catch up to the man who's left me behind.

I can't help but yawn as I pour my third cup of coffee then head to the bathroom to get ready for the day. I refuse to succumb to sleep any longer, caffeine is my new best friend. 

I'm going into work today to keep myself from going insane. Jack's flight is supposed to arrive late tonight and I just can't handle the anticipation.

The bathroom is freezing, so much so that the cold tile floor makes me resent the fact that I need to shower. I enter anyway and catch my reflection in the mirror.

I'm briefly startled before I recognize the witch in the mirror as myself. These last few days have wreaked havoc on me. I'm almost shocked to see the woman standing before me.

My eyes are slightly swollen from intermittently breaking down into tears last night.  One second I've convinced myself I'm okay and everything will be just fine, after all, it's just a simple misunderstanding.

The next, I'm hopelessly curled up in bed soaking a pillow with tears then flipping it over and repeating the process. Fortunately, I think I've about run dry.

My nose is raw from using toilet paper rather than soft tissues, because of course, what bachelor actually thinks to buy tissues at the grocery store? 
My cheeks are red and almost chapped from tears, both times I've looked this way involved Jackson.  This time it was my fault. 

I eye myself once again and debate on going back to bed, but I know I would be disappointed in myself later as I slowly slip into madness. 

It's going to take a lot of work to get myself looking decent enough to see Jack later.  I look down at the cheap flip phone I purchased at a convenience store. Bethany used to say they were called burn phones for drug dealers, cheap enough to toss after using once and supposedly untraceable.

Before my mind can register what I'm doing, my fingers are dialing Bethany, one of the very few phone numbers I've actually managed to memorize. She picks up almost immediately and my heart leaps for joy.

"Beth? It's me, Maggie, I've got a new phone. Um, sort of." I explain before she can even ask.

"MAGGIE!" Bethany screams, causing me to jerk my phone away from my ear. 

It's understandable that she's excited. I know it's been a while since we've spoken, my life has been completely consumed by Jackson.  I miss her.

"I'm sending out an S.O.S." I plead desperately and Beth instantly catches my hint.

"Are you at Jackson's? I'm just around the corner." I can hear the door shut behind her as if she's already on her way.

"I remember, it hasn't been that long since I lived there myself remember?" I tease and roll my eyes despite the fact that she can't see me. 

"Be there in five." She says before the line goes dead.

WHEN BETH ARRIVES I open the door slightly, careful not to let too much light in and her bright smile is a welcome sight.

Bethany's smile quickly fades the moment she sees the state I'm in and pushes her way through the door.

"Good God Maggie!  You look-" Bethany notices the stains left under my eyes from crying and reconsiders her next words. "Not bad, not bad really. We can work with this.  Don't worry."

Beth's voice is overly high pitched and exudes positivity because she thinks I need it. Who am I kidding? Of course I need it. But I see right through her and she knows better. 

"Give it to me straight Beth, Jack comes home today and I look like a hot mess.  Can you fix it?" I'm desperate, I'd hate Jack to see me this way.

Bethany's bright green eyes examine me professionally as she would have in the past when she was a beautician.  Nervously twirling one of her blonde curls around her finger she tugs on the rat's nest of hair I've twisted into a bun on the top of my head.

"Yes, we've got some work to do but we'll manage." She says with a bright smile and I let out the breath of air I was holding.  "First thing's first, you need a shower."

Bethany pushes me from behind down the hall until we've reached the bathroom, then shoves me in and shuts the door behind me.

"Don't forget to shave!" She shouts through the door and I let out an unexpected giggle.

I take a deep breath and let down my golden brown hair that's tangled in a bun and wonder if the Herbal Essences conditioner is enough to get these knots out. 

Bethany and I always used to make fun of their commercials. The women using it were essentially having orgasms while washing their hair, then came out looking like models. While I'm not necessarily looking for an orgasm, I hope it at least makes my hair look better than the cavewoman style I've got going on now.

Despite my reluctance to shower, the hot water feels amazing. I sit with my knees curled up into my stomach and let the hot water rain down hundreds of droplets darkening my hair.  I feel my anxiety being washed away and watch the water circle the drain, taking my worries with it.

What am I going to say when I see him?  I suppose I'll take it slow, warm up to him and give him a simple greeting before I apologize.  Whatever I do, I'll be sure to stay calm and collected because I've had enough of an emotional roller coaster on my own.

After lathering my body in Jack's favorite scent of vanilla body wash and working the knots out of my hair with conditioner, I'm ready to face the mirror again.

I make sure to secure my towel tightly around my chest and Bethany lets herself in, hauling a small suitcase full of beauty products behind her. 

Bethany has been around for as long as I can remember, she's been my family, my confidant and until very recently, my coworker and roommate. With her around, nothing ever seems quite as scary because I know I'm not alone.

"I took the liberty of going through your closet while you were in the shower." She says enthusiastically and her platinum blonde hair bobs along with her excitement.

She is also extremely nosy. I think as I cross my arms and scowl.

"And what skimpy dress did you just so happen to pick out for me?" I ask and in response, she tosses a few tube dresses out of the bathroom leaving only one draped over her makeup bag.

"Well I figured hair and makeup only go so far and if you end up leaving in pajamas I'll have failed." She says as she offers the dress that's leftover.

It's a black, knee-length, long sleeve dress with fabric that lightly grazes my skin, leaving the bottom to swish as I walk. I remember this dress, it was originally Bethany's. She gave it to me to wear the night Jackson asked me out.

I smile as I recall the memory.

Suddenly, I feel someone grip my arm from behind.  I'm expecting Bethany or even Christian, but in no way do I even dare to hope Jack might have ditched the women he was with for me.  However, I'm caught off-guard when I turn and find myself gazing into Jackson's diamond eyes.

"You were leaving without saying goodbye?" He looks hurt.

"You looked busy."  I say.  Too tired to show emotion, I nod towards the women he was standing with.  They are now gaping at us through the open front door.

He nervously runs his hand through his hair and I watch the sleeve of his shirt strain from his biceps.  "Can I take you somewhere tomorrow?" He asks.

"What?" I'm shocked, "Like a date?"

"I don't date." He huffs.

"Oh, so you don't date either?" I laugh.  "Oh Charming, you're giving me whiplash."

He mystifies me.  One second we're making out on the balcony, the next he's hanging out with groupies.  One second he's asking me out, the next he drops a bomb that he doesn't date.

Jackson's hair falls back in his eyes and he runs his hand through his hair again.  Jesus, if he keeps doing that I'm not going to be able to control my actions.  He's got hair moves like Shawn from Boy Meets World and it's driving me crazy.

I feel a hand on the small of my back again and realize it's Sam. 

"The cars here." He says.

"Okay, I'll be right there." I reply with a tired smile.  Sam hovers unsure if he should leave me, but only for a second, then he walks to the car.

Jackson's jaw clenches and he exclaims, "Jesus, okay one date."

"Well don't do me any favors." I say with a smirk and one eyebrow raised.

I'm gaining confidence by the second.  I suddenly love this feeling of having the upper hand. 

His eyebrows pull together.  "Come on Mags."

"Sam is waiting on me.  My time is too valuable to deal with your ego's fear of rejection.  So if you want me, just be a man and ask."  I meant for my tone to be playful but it comes out a little harsh. I begin to apologize when he speaks.

"Will you go on a date with me?" He blurts almost angrily.

"Charming," I say in mock flattery, "I thought you'd never ask." I say trying to hide an impossible grin.

"I'll pick you up at four tomorrow."  And just like that, he's jogging back to the party.

I abruptly realize I'm staring at the dress with a goofy smile plastered on my face and I'm not alone.  My eyes meet hers and she returns a knowing smile.