Last night I was running away from Jackson but this morning I'm inviting him to my bed.  What madness have I gotten myself into?

When we enter the bedroom I trigger on the little lamp on my nightstand and start to dig for something more comfortable to wear.  I was never intending on inviting a boy to my room so it's a bit of a mess. 

He sits on my rickety full-sized bed but immediately jumps up when he hears the noise it makes. I can't help but let out a giggle, I definitely need a new mattress. 

My room has the very same cherry wood furnishings I grew up with, I just happened to take them with me when I moved.  I wanted to buy all new furniture once I got around to it, but like most things in my life, I never got around to it.  Once Jack's sure it will hold him, he reclines casually and looks around the room. 

I find a large T-shirt and some soft shorts.  The straps of my bra are painfully digging into my shoulders and I can't wait to get it off.  I'm jealous of the women who can pull off going out in public without a bra because I am definitely not one of them.  My breasts are too large to not be contained unless I am in private.  In this case, of course, I'm not entirely in private but I figure we're just going to lay in bed anyway. 

I'm about to pull my shirt over my head until I feel Jackson's eyes watching me.  "Turn around and no peeking."

He smirks and rolls those diamond eyes of his and turns to face the wall with a cute smirk.   "It's not like I haven't seen you naked before."

"Charming!"  I tease and turn myself to the mirror so I can see if he peeks. 

I'm worried he's going to turn around so I try to change as quickly as possible.  I throw my blouse in the corner of the room and pull my t-shirt over my head before sliding my bra off through the sleeve.  The second I unsnap the hooks of my bra I close my eyes and let out a moan of relief.  I begin to rubbing my shoulders where the straps left indents and stretch my neck side to side.

When I open my eyes again I see Charming is watching me. "Hey!  I said no peeking!" 

He bites his lip ring and turns back to face the wall.  I let out a giggle and start unzipping my jeans.

I know, I know, he's seen me naked. But it's one thing to have an intimate moment with another person and a whole different situation to be completely exposed. It's as if I'd be standing here in the light of day saying, 'Here I am, stretch marks and all. Check me out.' After everything, I'm just not ready to be that vulnerable with him again.

I quickly slip my skinny jeans below my knees and try to hop out of them but my heel gets caught in the cuff and I fall to the floor.  I land directly on my bruised buttcheek and all the air is knocked out of me.

Shit

"Shit!" I shout breathlessly.

Jackson is at my side so quickly that I didn't even hear him get up.  I roll over to my side and without thinking, pull my shirt up attempting to look at the bruise completely exposing my underwear. 

Jackson's hand catches mine before I can pull my shirt back over me and his thumb gently grazes the bottom of my butt cheek right below the bruise.  A slow heat spreads through my entire body as he examines me and my heart starts to pound out of my chest. 

"Wow Mags, that's really bad." He grimaces.

I tug my shirt back down to cover up and realize I'm in a precarious position with my jeans still wrapped around my ankles.  Before I can decide my next move, I feel him reach beneath my knees and under my arms.  He gently lifts me up and carries me to the bed, jeans hanging from my ankles and all.

Jack very carefully lays me down on the bed and makes sure there's a pillow beneath my head.  He then walks to the edge and gently slides my jeans off one leg at a time while is diamond eyes bore into mine.  I feel my breath speed up and my heart swell as I watch him take care of me.

He sets the jeans on my dresser without bothering to fold them.  I'm reminded of the future wrinkles that will leave, but at this moment I don't mind.  I don't bother asking him to grab my soft shorts because my t-shirt is so long it comes down almost past the bottom of my backside and speaking after watching him remove my pants seems impossible.

Since my bed is small, I slide as close as I can to the edge and pat the side where I'd like him to lay.  He obliges and lays down on his back looking up at the ceiling.

I prop my head up on my wrist to get a good look at him. He's wearing the same clothes he was wearing yesterday and they look just as disheveled and tired as he does.  I'd offer him a change of clothes but I'm afraid I don't have anything that would fit him.

Jack gazes around my room, examining my various posters covering the wall.  I've got a few vintage posters, Pride and Prejudice, Wuthering Heights and even a Gatsby painting lining my walls.  But of all the artwork littering my walls his eyes land on my dream board and he gets up to examine it.

"What's all this?" He asks as he observes it thoroughly.

"That's my dream board." I add sheepishly. I'm a little embarrassed that I'm supposedly a grown woman and still keep a dream board.

He eyes it over curiously, "What's this area?" He says as he points to the area with cutouts of different cities and countries. 

"Those are all of the places I want to visit."  I say happily but still a little nervous about him scrutinizing my hopes and dreams.

He points to the pictures of Big Ben and the Tower of London and says, "I'll take you there."

My cheeks flush and my heart warms as I imagine traveling and making future plans with Jackson.  It's such an odd idea after last night.  Traveling to a different country with him would be exciting, but also dangerous.  I can just imagine myself saying the wrong thing and getting left behind. 

Jack lays back in bed without a word and props his head up on his elbow.  I trace his lip lightly with the tip of my finger and play with his lip ring.  He watches me with his beautiful blue eyes and pretends to bite my finger which makes me jump and we both laugh.

I set my sights a bit lower, and my fingertips trace his tattoos, attempting to memorize his body.  He's got a few randomly placed, for instance, there's a grey-black feather on his neck that I continue tracing.

The ink that intrigues me the most is the one scrolling up his ribs.  It looks like a collage of books covering his entire rib area and says something I can't quite read beneath his thin white shirt. 

I lay my heavy head on the pillow he's using, my head is almost close enough to touch his shoulder.  I've never slept next to a boy before, I don't know if we should cuddle, or what spoon I would be.  I don't even know where we stand as of now so I could be worrying about this for no reason.  I mean, he did just tell me this was a mistake last night.  I wrinkle my brow at the thought.

"What are you thinking?" He asks curiously.  I didn't realize he was studying my face.

"I was just wondering about your tattoos." I cover for myself. "What's this one?" I point to the tattoo covering his ribs.

"In the end, we're all stories." He lifts his shirt so I can see the ink covering his ribs and I gaze over the beautiful collage of bookends.  Some of the books are scattered, some open and some neatly arranged.  I can see some of the titles are London, Washington, and Arizona.  I'm assuming these are places he's lived. 

There are some other titles that I can't guess the meaning of, they're drawn tattered and destroyed as if they're completely uncared for.  I have a feeling this must be a book symbolizing hard times, but I don't ask because I'm afraid to pry.  A lot of the book titles are empty, they're half drawn and look as if maybe they're unfinished. 

"Did you forget to fill some of them out?" I ask running my finger over some of the pages on his skin.

"No.  Those are for future chapters of my life." He says quietly and his eyes still search my face.  But why? Why is he so interested in my reaction when he was just telling me to leave him alone last night?

I smile, "I really love it." And I do, he's an author who tells stories of other people all the time yet he's printed his life story in permanent ink. "It's beautiful." 

I can't help myself when I pick a out a beautiful book cover from the available empty spaces and think to myself 'Our story should go here.' Without really thinking I lean over and lay a gentle kiss on the book I picked out.  He smiles at me as if he knows what I'm thinking and my heart warms.

"Maggie, I want to talk about last night." Jack quickly changes the topic.

I honestly don't know if I want to hear what he has to say.  I just want to enjoy this moment with him without it being ruined by senseless words.  I don't want to start another fight and I don't want him making promises he can't keep. 

"Can we just live in this moment for now?" I say, taking a page out of his own book.  His diamond eyes widen and a grin spreads across his face. 

"Well, well, now who wants to avoid getting serious?" He smirks.

"It's not that."  I say honestly.  "I'm just enjoying this moment of peace with you and I don't want to fight again." 

"That's fine, but I need you to hear what I'm going to say.  I need to get it off my chest." His tone is serious.

I sigh and resign myself to another depressing conversation.  He giggles at my reaction and his hand starts caressing my cheek.  I feel warmth spread through my face and resist the temptation to close my eyes.  Instead, my gaze meets his and I wait to hear what he has to say.

"I've been a lot of girls bad-boy phase.  I don't give a fuck about anyone or anything, I drive too fast, I'm covered in tattoos, I drink too much and I have a new woman every night.  I'm a fucking prick Mags." 

I cringe at his confession and try to look away but he grabs my face. "I've had plenty of women who thought they could tame me Maggie, but they can't.  I'm broken worse than most.  I'm beyond repair so if you're thinking I'm a project you can fix, it isn't going to happen."

Anger builds up in my chest and I start to speak but he puts one finger on my lips and finishes. "But of all those shitty things I am, a fool is not one of them.  I've tried to fool myself into denying the feelings I have for you, feelings I've never felt for another human being.  I can't bear the thought of you being hurt by me and I know it's inevitable that I'll fuck up somehow.  But I'm a selfish bastard and I don't have it in me to stay away from you."

I feel tears welling up in my eyes from his confession.  He tried to deny his feelings for me because he thought he'd hurt me?  He wipes a single tear from my cheek and I clear my throat.  "I honestly don't know what to say." 

He smiles and says, "That's okay baby, think it over."

Isn't this what I wanted?  I wanted him to open up and tell me how he feels but now the red flags that I fought to ignore are coming back up in my head again. 

He just admitted he has feelings for me but right after admitting he'll hurt me.  He's already hurt me and we haven't even started dating.  Plus he has a serious temper that he needs to work on.  But then again he just told me I can't fix him, so is the temper what I get with this non-change policy? 

"You want to be with me?" I ask unsure.

"I want you to be mine Maggie, but I don't want you to just accept that right now.  I want you to spend time with me more and then decide if being with me is what you want." He's being so patient, this is so unlike him. 

"I think I'm going to need some time." I say hesitantly.

"Good I was hoping you would say that."  He smiles.

"You were not!" I slap his shoulder and laugh. 

"Yes, I was because I don't want to be with someone who is willing to get walked all over.  I need someone who's strong enough to be with me if this is going to happen."  He laughs and says, "I'm private with my past but I want to show you who I am and that has nothing to do with my past.  We'll just see how this goes."

The more I think about it the more I like this plan.  "No pressure, we'll just see how it goes? Kind of like friends?"  I ask.

"Yep, let's start over."  He reaches out to shake my hand.  "Hi I'm Jackson and I'd like to take you on a date Tuesday."

"Hi Jackson," I shake his hand with a laugh. "It's not often I meet new people in my bed."

"Oh, you haven't? You should try it more.  This is how I pick up all my women." Jack gives me a cocky smirk.

I laugh at him and push his chest jokingly but he falls to the floor taking all the blankets with him. 

"Fuck!" He shouts as he collides with the wooden floor in a heavy thud.

"Shh, you're going to wake up Bethany."  But I can't control my laughter so if anyone's going to be waking her, it's me.

"You're sleeping on the floor, goodnight Charming." I finally manage after controlling my laughter.

Jack groans, "Fine, then I'm keeping the blankets."

"That's fair, the heater is working wonders and it will probably get pretty chilly down there on the hardwood floor." I reply through a smirk.

"Oh come on, friends don't let friends sleep on the floor." He says with a mixture of a grin and a pout.

"That may be so, but I just met you and I don't let charming boys I just met sleep in my bed." I say in the cockiest voice I can muster.

"You're right, how astute of me to assume.  Dear lady, I shall sleep on the couch in the living room."

Jackson stands and bows as if he's Prince Charming then starts heading for the door but before he can get too far I grab his arm and pull him onto the bed beside me.

"You're not going anywhere." I whisper.  I can feel the electricity radiating off his hand through mine.

"I knew I'd call you're bluff." He whispers back through a smile into my ear. 

I roll my eyes but the corner of my mouth deceives me as it turns up in a grin and I roll to face the wall. 

"Goodnight." I whisper, even though the early morning light is streaming through my windows. 

Jack's arm wraps around my waist and he pulls me flush against him.  I can feel his chest rising and falling against me and his warm breath on the back of my neck. 

"Goodnight Mags."  My name sounds good in his beautiful accent.

As I start to fall asleep in our comfortable embrace, I wonder if I'll ever again be able to sleep without him next to me.