Izuku Midoriya laid on the floor, staring at the ceiling. It had been long hours since Bakugo and Kirishima had left, and he didn't want to have to say goodbye. Everything in the world seemed so much more dull.

Izuku threw an arm over his eyes, and breathed out heavily. Sometimes he laid so still, that it felt like he was floating. Floating where nothing could touch or hurt him. Not his illness, not the world, nothing.

Sometimes he thought about the world he could be a part of.

He could be a hero saving others with a smile. He could stand tall making sure everyone was well and never failing to save someone. He wouldn't be frail and ill, he'd be strong and powerful.

He could be a civilian witnessing heroic greatness. He could be a part of a buzzing crowd, staring in awe as a hero brought justice and safety to those around him.

He could be quirkless just living his life. He could meet someone, get married, grow old and start a family. He could be an average joe, just going to work and coming home.

He could even be a villain fighting against the hero society. He could strike people where it hurts and grin as he watches them bleed. He might be a little crazy even... laughing in the face of danger. He didn't really like that idea, but it was a reality he pondered.

He had no future and no life.

But you don't need a future or life to dream of one.

The point was, he was 17 years old, and he had done nothing to better society. Absolutely nothing. He was 17 years old and hardly ever left his moms house. What do they call that? A bum.

He stood up, and coughed in his arm while walking towards white curtains. His room was all dark, the white looking grey, and he was so sick of white. He was so sick of his monochrome world, that he yearned for a future and life, just for once. He ripped the curtains open to look out the one window in his room...

It led directly into a dark brick wall.

For some reason, he always hoped that one day he would open the window and it would show him something completely different. The rising sun, the sparkling stars, or maybe a hero fighting villains. Anything other than a crusty red brick wall.

He wanted to destroy that wall.

Izuku would never say it, but he didn't find it fair. It wasn't fair that every day he had to fear of every single germ that entered his lungs. It wasn't fair that he had to be in pain and even be allowed to see the world. He had more freedom when he was four. He didn't think it was fair that he was locked away for being sick. Lock in a white room that resembled an institution. When he woke every morning he thought he had finally gone crazy. He hated the color white. It was almost more exciting when the red of his blood colored then just a little bit.

Katsuki Bakugo got to see the world. He got to witness the horrors and beauty and all Midoriya got to see was a brick wall.

The green haired boy looked down at the window. It was deadbolts shut. His hands slowly touched the bolts and he gently yanked up. It didn't budge. He shook it a little, something coming over. He craved the outside air. He hadn't breathe it in over a decade. He gritted his teeth and yanked in the window that wouldn't move a bit.

He realized it hopeless.

He collapsed onto his knees, hands in his lap, and looking down. His green eyes were dead and full of sorrow.

"Izuku? Are you okay, sweet heart?" His mom called to him as she walked towards his room.

The green haired boys head snapped up and he ran to his bed, jumping onto it, and sitting crossed leg. He smiled and coughed gently from the fast movement. His mom opened the door, concern in her eyes.

"Hey, are you alright? I heard a weird sound." She had worry in her green eyes. The corners of them had stress lines and her lips were down turned.

Izuku smiled and waved his hand. "Mom, I'm fine. Don't worry so much."

He didn't even realize the window had made any noise when he tried to open it.

"...Okay. Sometimes I just worry about you, you know." The woman touched her fingers together, her eyes filled with sympathy and worry. Izuku got up form his white bed. The springs creaking as he moved.

His frail frame hugged his mother, his arms around her.

"Never worry about me." He buried his freckles face into the crook of his moms neck, comforting her. He couldn't tell her he was okay.

He couldn't tell her everything was alright.

"Don't do anything to make me worry." The woman sniffed, her voice faltering as tears filled her eyes. "You're all I have left, Izu."

Izuku gripped her tightly and sighed. His breathing was labored, as he tried to compose himself. He brought himself back and looked at his mother. He offered her a gentle smile, and wiped the tears from her face.

She laughed sadly and sniffled. She wiped her eyes and said, "I'm happy Katsuki brought that red haired boy all those weeks ago. You... you deserve a life, Izu."

A life.

He wanted so desperately to tell her this wasn't living. That if this was living, he didn't want to live. He would rather drown in his own blood, and stain this white prison cell with some sort of color-

But all he did was smile. All he could do is smile.

The green haired boy swallowed and nodded. "I'm happy he did too, Mom. Kirishima is nice."

The woman smiled and began to walk towards the door. "I'm going to head to the store. Do you want anything while I'm out? A book?"

Izuku shook his head, and walked over to his bed, sitting down. "No I'm fine. I think I'm going to nap for a bit."

Inko smiled, her eyes red and puffy. "...I want nothing more than to bring you with me."

The green haired boy flinched slightly but shook his head. "It's better if I stay here. Better safe than sorry, right?" His mother laughed and walked out the door, waving to her son.

Midoriya waved back, his hand falling into his lap as soon as she was gone.

He looked over at the window, and realized the curtain was still open. He sighed and walked towards the window once again.

His pale and cold fingers touched the white cloth hanging up. He gently caressed it looking at the brick wall before him. Slowly but surely, he pulled the curtains closed once again.

He turned his back to the window and stood, staring at his room.

This is living.

This... is living.

He shook his head, some green hair falling in front of his eyes.

"No it isn't."

~~~
Heyyyy to those who asked "wH eN aRE yo U GO nN a UpdAtE ThI s S TO rY? !"

Surprise mother fucker.

Boom updated. Praise me~

No don't praise me. I've just felt really into wanting to write lately so here you McFucking go~

Now, dear those of you who think this is gonna be happier than my V! Deku story...

I'll maybe update this some day sooner and not a literal year later (Lmfao I'm so sorry to those of you who like it-).

Wishing you the best, your completely crazy author:

~Rin :)