~Tao~

Shrill, obnoxious, loud. The tone rips through the calm air of the room, incessant and unforgiving. I groan, rolling over and press my face against something warm and soft as my half asleep brain refuses to give up the remaining hold on unconsciousness. I hear Kris chuckle in my ear and feel his stomach flex beneath my cheek.

His sleep heavy voice reverberates off the walls of the small room and sends a shiver down my spine. He continues to talk and i blearily tip my head back to glance up at him. He smiles down at me, fondly running his fingers through my messy morning hair as he has a conversation with the person on the other side of the phone currently pressed to his ear.

I hum and rub my face against his torso, loving the way he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. I know how he feels. It feels like every touch now is new, yet also comfortingly familiar. I'm slowly becoming addicted to touching him.

"Yeah, okay. I understand. I'll be there soon." Kris says with a deep sigh and hangs up, giving me a regretful look.

"You're leaving?" I ask, trying to keep the disappointment out of my voice.

Kris releases a heavy breath and lets a hand run roughly down his face. "They need me downtown. Apparently some type of problem has come up with processing. I need to go check it out. Heechul is going to meet me down there."

I nod and slowly pull away from him. "Was that Heechul?"

"Yeah. It shouldn't take all day, just a few hours." Kris says, leaning forward to catch my hands as i sit up.

My lip habitually pulls up between my teeth and i just nod. "Okay."

"Hey," Kris says, scooting forward and placing two fingers on the side of my cheek, forcing me to look at him. "What's wrong? Talk to me, Baby. We need to talk about things that bother us, remember."

I blink at my boyfriend and feel my heart clench. He's right. Of course he's right. I sigh and let the full weight of this let down fall upon my shoulders. I guess i just got so used to being the backseat to Kris's work, that hiding my disappointment and abandoned feelings came second nature to me. Even going as far to hide them from myself. I always felt that trying to tell Kris that he's working too much or that i want to be a priority for once was selfish of me. His work is important and I shouldn't ask him to discard it because i want attention, but as he explained to me the other night, how is he supposed to know how I'm feeling if i don't tell him?

"Can Heechul not take care of it by himself? Today is our day off together and i wanted to spend it together being lazy in bed." I explain, my chest shallow with anxiety.

Kris's eye soften and he smiles at me. "You don't want me to go?"

I scoff and shake my head. "I never do."

Kris grins brightly, satisfied, and i almost hit him. The smug bastard. "I don't want to leave either. You're warm and gods, your touch is like life to me right now, but i have to, my love. It's really important and they need me there. How about i promise you that I'll be back by noon and then we'll spend the rest of the day tangled in each other. I'll even silence my phone."

I bite my lip. "That does sound amazing. And you promise you'll be home by noon?"

"Of course. As long as you promise hours of endless cuddles." He says with a dorky grin that melts my heart.

"Okay, deal, loser. Now go be the big boss, I'll wait for you." I say, pushing him off the bed playfully.

He whines and groans, fighting momentarily only to seize a kiss before laughing all the way to the bathroom to jump into a quick shower.

I hum absently and place my head on the dip between my bent knees, watching after the door. This, this feels close to right. This feeling of being cared for and about. Being asked how I feel and the effort to compromise. This is grown up, real, yet still loving and fresh. This is the feeling that I've been craving. I just wanted to be seen and heard, and right now i was. There's something so consumingly soothing about that.

In all honesty, i was worried that Kris was going to fight with me and not pick up easily on the communication between us, but i think he's doing better than i am. I think that Kris has been wanting this between us for a while now, he just didn't know how to bring it up. The other night, the damn that separated us was broken wide open and now we have no choice to show each other what we've been hiding behind that wall. Kris has wanted to tell me how he feels, but he was scared and didn't want to be left vulnerable. But now there's an evolved trust between us. We laid our feelings out and proved to one another that we are valid. We deserve to feel safe in each other's arms. Words come easy when the person you're talking to wants to listen.

It doesn't mean everything is fixed and that there aren't days where communication is hard, but it means we're getting there. We're talking, we're feeling, we're finding new and exciting parts about each other. We're finding the old parts that made us fall in the first place. We're getting closer every day to where we want to be, and that's more than i could have ever asked for out of Kris. It proves that he wants us just as much as i do and that I'm important enough to swallow his pride, something that doesn't come easy for Kris. My lover, my partner, my best friend. He's fighting for me. I fall deeper every time i see that love struck, determined look in his eyes.

Kris comes out of the bathroom, hastily drying himself off and heading over to his desk to grab all of his things and packing them into his bag. I smile at him and amble to the closet, picking out a simple, yet refined outfit. He offers me a thankful kiss when i hand it to him and begins jumping into the clothes.

I walk around our room, picking up a few things and hear a soft curse behind me. I turn and snort, then shake my head at my lover, before pulling the tie out of his hands and loping it for him. Even after all of this time, when he's in a rush, he can't form a proper tie knot to save his life. He gives me another kiss, this one lingering, letting me know just how much he wishes he was still in our bed. I pleasantly moan into it and am soon backed up against my work desk.

He pulls away and smirks down at me. "Noon."

"Noon." I repeat like a sealed promise and watch the love of my life fly out of our room knowing he'll be back in my arms soon enough.

>>>>>>

~Kris~

"What?" The deep husky voice greets.

I chuckle, holing my phone closer to my ear to hear his pleasant morning voice. Soo always had a habit of having one of those voices that dances on the line of pleasant and startling. But when he just wakes up, his voice holds a depth that swirls your soul into knots. I used to love waking up to that voice, hell i still do, even if now it's the just comforting rasp of my best friend.

"Soo, you really need to figure out how to be pleasant in the mornings." I say, my tone light and amused.

There was good news today and I'm just in a happy mood. I'm sure it'll only prove to irritate my darling little that much more.

"Piss off. What do you want? It's 7:30 in the damn morning, Kris. Jesus. What is wrong with you? It's Saturday." He curses as if he just checked the time and is in minor disbelief.

I hear an agreeable whine in the background and i realize that i must have woken up Jongin too.

"Okay, i do apologize for my insensitivity, but seriously, Kyungsoo... i need advice." I say, adding an extra bit of pleading to my tone.

Kyungsoo sighs and i can tell he's given in. "What is it?"

"I'm currently standing at a jewelry counter staring down at all kinds of sparkly shit and i need to know if getting Tao a gift for something I feel bad about could come off as dickish?"

Silence greets me, but then i hear Kyungsoo take his signature thoughtful breath. "Depends. What is your motive? Do you want to give it to him so he won't be mad at you or to prevent him from being upset about it?"

"No, i want to give it to him so he can physically see how much i love and appreciate him." I explain, twirling my finger around a sparkling loop of metal and gems.

The lady across the counter who has been waiting on me, smiles genuinely and i think I've won her over with my sincerity.

"Then no. Just make sure he knows that it's not to pacify him, but rather a gesture of love and it should be fine." Kyungsoo says gently, much less grumpily than his usual morning attitude. I can only attribute it to Jongin being with him.

I bite at the inside of my cheek and purse my lips for a second thinking it over. Kyungsoo stays silent letting me collect my thoughts. "Even if it's a ring?"

Kyungsoo doesn't say anything for a few seconds before a calculated "do you think that's wise?" Sounds through the speaker.

I chuckle and shake my head. "Not like that, Soo. It's less of a step, more of a promise."

"Intent, in most cases is worse than the crime itself." Kyungsoo deadpans.

I snort. "You think marriage is a punishable offense, Soo?"

I hear a sad sounding whine and can only assume Jongin is wondering the same thing. "For you two. Yes. It would be a murder to your relationship and where it is right now. Inevitably, it's your choice, but i feel that glossing over the near restart of your relationship with a ring would take you back ten steps."

I set the sparkly circle down and frown. "Fuck, yeah... you're right."

"Usually." I can year the smile in the little shits voice. "But... and here's the best advice i can give you. If you want to show him you love him, buy him something he likes. One of his favorite things. Something that shows him that you know and listen to him. It doesn't need to be expensive or grand. Trust me, we all know you can afford it, but it's not about the money, it's about taking his feelings into account."

I smile and nod at the lady over the counter who winks at me and silently wishes me luck as i head out of the jewelry department.

"Has anyone ever told you how amazing you are?" I ask, heading towards the escalators.

I hear Jongin chuckle. "I tell him every day, Hyung. He doesn't believe me."

"Listen to your boyfriend more, Soo. You're amazing and you might have just saved my relationship." I say leaning my back against the moving rail.

The responding eyeroll is thick in his voice. "Go buy your own boyfriend something to let him know how amazing you think he is. I'm going back to bed."

The call ends without a second thought or word and i laugh loudly at his usual bluntness. It's one of my favorite things about him.

I reach the bottom floor and am about to head to the makeup and accessory department when i notice something out of the corner of my eye and i stop in my tracks. A grin pulls at my lips and i instantly b-line for the store. I refuse to be my father. I'll show Tao that i know him more than anyone and that my love doesn't have to be diamond rings and designer cloths.

...

Shopping bag placed over my arm i exist the store and head for the elevators leading to the parking garage.

A call of my name stops me, however, and i turn to find the source. Finding him quickly, my blood pulses through my body like it's trying to win a marathon.

Jonghyun walks towards me, his expression cautious and unsure. It makes sense seeing the almost healed bruise coloring his cheek and eye. He stops feet from me and i think it might be smart on his part.

There isn't any residual anger for this man, but there is a level of annoyance. He still touched my Tao and that sort of wrong will never disappear from my pride. As much as i try, i still know who i am, and Tao is still mine.

"Jonghyun, How can i help you?" I say as politely as i can.

Jonghyun smiles sadly and lowers his head. "Listen, i just want to apologize. What i did and how i acted was very wrong of me. I'm inexcusably sorry, Kris. I really am."

It surprises me, that i wont lie about, but i feel my hackles deflate almost instantly. He seems genuine and earnest in his apology, but most importantly regret.

"Well, tha-"

"Jonghyun? Oh, there you are." A smallish boy bounds over to us with an air of confidence that even surprises me and I'm basically married to the prince of diva himself. I can only assume that this is the best friend, Kibum, i think Tao said his name is. "Wait, who is this?"

Jonghyun sighs at his boyfriend's? outlandish ways and i have never related to more in my life. "This is Kris, we were kind of having a personal talk, Ki."

Kibum raises an immaculate eyebrow and gestures for us to continue without making any move to let us have privacy. I almost laugh at how much he's like my own boyfriend and i can understand why Jonghyun developed a crush on Tao.

Jonghyun sighs and shakes his head, but i just let it go. It's easier to let things go sometimes. "Like i was saying, thank you for apologizing. It actually does mean a lot, and also I'm sorry too, for you know." I say motioning to the yellow greenish bruise adorning his face.

The other seems to deflate a bit and i also feel a small amount of pressure release from my shoulders. Tao's right. Sometimes talking things out and letting things go just feels good. Pride be damned.

"Wait." A startling screech pierces my ears. "You're the one who hit him?"

All of a sudden i have a small human, packed with as much fire and sass that would put Baekhyun's mom to shame, in my face rapidly yelling insults and shaking his finger at me like an enraged mother. All i can do is gap and state wide eyed at the small man.

"Kibum." A loud yell stops the other and makes both of us jump. The man in front of me turns to his friend who's staring at him with anger and annoyance. "That's enough. Kris was in the right to hit me. He's Tao's boyfriend and i kissed Tao a few weeks ago. This is none of your business. Wait for me over there."

Kibum's mouth opens and gapes like a fish out of water. "Jong-"

"No. I'm serious. Go." Jonghyun says, motioning for his friend to leave.

Kibum stares at the other with wide and yet curious eyes, like he's somehow seeing his best friend in a new light. But eventually gives in and nods, heading off towards the escalators without another word.

"I'm sorry." Jonghyun says sheepishly, his face pinching.

I wave it off and chuckle. "You know, Tao. I have one of those too, so it's not a big deal."

Jonghyun snorts and nods his head. "I do know Tao. I think for a short amount of time i confused what we were doing with what i was feeling. Tao gave me attention and treated me like a lover. I guess i got lost in that for a minute. It was nice to feel wanted even if it was fabricated to get you to notice him."

My heart tugs slightly and i nod. "Tao's just one of those people. You can't help but love his confidence and comfortable nature. It's not surprising that you felt something for him." I say, and reach out clapping a hand onto his shoulder. "I know he cared about you too, and I'd really like to see you two as friends in the future."

Jonghyun blinks at me a little surprised, but i can tell by the sparkle in his eyes that he's touched by my consideration.

"I can see why Tao loves you and fought so hard for you." Jonghyun says with a cute grin.

A snort leaves me and i wink at the other. "Let's hope he continues to see it."

Jonghyun gives me a light chuckle and it seems like he's lost ten years off his soul. I leave him with a wave and a promise for all of us to meet for coffee soon. I can see that Jonghyun is a good person and in the small amount of time i talked to him, i understand why he became so important to my love. Jonghyun has a beautiful heart and he just wants the best for everyone.

Feeling even better than before, i quickly make my way to my car the faster i can get this situation cleared up the faster I can head home to the love of my life and the snuggles i had been promised earlier.

....

The music can be heard even when i reach the top of the stairs and i immediately know it's coming from my room. I've heard the song at least a million times. It's one of Tao's favorites, band and song. I've never been a fan of classical metal music, but there is a sort of rhythmic and intense tone to this particular band that I've come to appreciate. The beautiful and emotional cellos that we're just harsh and dramatic, even out into a single solitary note and my heart squeezes. I've never been a fan of this band until Tao, that is. Now i could tell you the name of each song and admit that i have many of their albums on my laptop.

I look down at my watch and smile. 11:52. I made it.

Our door silently squeaks open under the loud music and what i find waiting for me makes a smile stretch across my face. My breathtaking boyfriend sits on the floor in the middle of the room, with his sewing machine placed between his legs. The afternoon light glitters through the window and kisses his body that's loosely shrouded in a silk floral kimono that i picked up for him the last time i was in Japan. I tried to find one of the smallest ones i could for his slender frame, but it still drapes him. Seeing how one side slips off his shoulder, resting over the crease of his elbow, and dipping down low on his back, i don't particularly see this as a negative.

I love seeing Tao like this. When we were living together while Tao was a senior in high school, i used to watch him for hours. Drawing, planning, putting together his ideas and then finally putting it all together. The way he could take random pieces of fabric and turn it into a striking work of art. The day Heechul decided to give him a shot was the day we sealed our fateful success, and that's not me being biased, that's just Tao being that good.

Releasing a dreamy sigh at how perfect my baby is, i set my things down and go to change into something comfortable. Though suits look good and professional, I'll always be a sweats and T-shirt kind of guy. When i come back, Tao is still in his element, feeding fabric through his machine, his eyes sharply focused in on his work.

I sink to the floor behind him and encase his legs with my own. One propped up, bent at the knee and the other sticking straight out. I'm still amazed by his flexibility. My arms automatically wraps around his middle and i place my chin on his shoulder. Out of the corner of my eye, i see Tao pause for only a moment but then he smiles and continues. His magical fingers continuing to work his own special brand of sorcery. He's beautiful and i could spend hours watching him.

"How did your meeting go?" He asks, his voice cutting through the cellos and the thrum of the machine.

I hum and smooth my hand over his stomach, spreading my fingers to cover the full circumference of it. His abdomen flexes absentmindedly and I can't help smiling. "It went well. The downtown branch was getting more than they could handle and were having issues over it. We've been getting a large influx of activity and orders. I think it's due to Yixing's increased public interaction. I know he was doing it to get Jun's attention, but we might have to talk to him about coming out of his hiatus. Heechul suggested looking for a larger warehouse or maybe even a second one."

Tao chuckles and his shoulders lift. "Well maybe the stalker guy is good for something after all."

I snort and place a small kiss to the back of his neck. "It's still weird that you guys call Jun the "stalker guy"."

"It's still weird that you're on nickname terms with the guy that Yixing stalked for nearly a year." Tao counters.

"Well... yeah, that's fair." I agree.

Tao laughs silently. The small flutter of his abdomen giving him away. I think I've seen him laugh more in the past few days than i have in months combined and that alone makes me feel reassured. Like finally I'm getting my Tao back and were slowly migrating to where we need to be. We still have a lot of work to do, but if we can keep making one another happy, then that's enough for now. Stitch by stitch, were coming back to one another.

"Oh, i got you something." I say pulling away slightly, only to retrieve my the bag and pull out the box from inside.

Tao stops the machine for a second and looks back at me curiously, and i swear that the way his eyes light up when he sees what's in my hand, is the closest a mortal like me has ever come to magic.

"My favorite!" He sings happily as he smiles adoringly at the box of cookies, before his eyes lift to me and they crinkle adorably.

The sparkle in his eyes makes my heart flutter and God's I'm such an idiot sometimes. All it took to get this look is a simple box of cookies. Such a small gesture that says "hey, i know you. I know your favorite things." That's all it took, was to show him that i love him enough to remember what he likes and to surprise him with the things that makes him happiest in this world. He didn't want fancy jewelry or a diamond ring, just a stupid snack that i bought for a few notes. But it means more than any hunk of twisted metal and cold stones ever could.

Tao opens his mouth and i laugh while popping open the box. I place one on his tongue and watch as he hums happily, doing a cute little body shimmy. He turns back to his work and i resume my earlier position, feeding him cookies occasionally and placing small, loving kisses on any piece of bare skin i can reach.

A warm happy bubble fills my stomach and soon I'm finding the world disappearing around me, lulled into dreamland by the warmth and comfort of my boyfriend being where he's always belonged; in my arms.

>>>>>>

~Tao~

I open my mouth in the familiar rhythm we had picked up over the past hour and wait, but no cookie comes. I admit that i had gotten focused on a particular difficult part, but i didn't think it was long enough to prompt Kris to stop paying attention to my cookie demands. I glance over at him, to find his head situated even further on my shoulder, his eyes closed, and his breathing coming out in deep, steady breaths. He's fallen asleep.

I pin down the wave of amusement, not wanting to wake him, and sit a little straighter so he can be in a more comfortable position. My fingers go back to stitching the demo piece Sehun and I had come up with a few days prior and let Kris slumber away on my shoulder. His day must have been hard to have to wake up like that and immediately go into boss mode. I couldn't imagine it. He's definitely stronger than me in that area. Kris likes taking charge and i don't mind being the magic behind the curtain. It's why we work. I can't even think about how Yixing and this Jun guy is going to get along. Two very strong willed people trying to cohabitate. It'll be interesting to say the least.

Kris mumbles something in his sleep and shifts, hugging me tighter, before relaxing and seeming to sag into me. I smile and lift a hand rubbing it over his, before going back to my machine. This is all I've ever really wanted to begin with. I went about it in a drastically wrong way, but this closeness is what i had been missing. I never needed Kris's undivided attention or the sexual intensity that used to consume us, but for Kris to just BE here. Even in the simple moments. The quiet moments where words don't need to be said and excitement doesn't need to be had, all that's needed is my person right next to me.

I never needed Kris to be that spontaneous, fun guys that he was in high school. I just needed him to be the person who looks at me like i hold the galaxy in my eyes. To sit next to me like I'm the most comfortable place to be. Who needs me as much as i need him. It was here all along waiting for me. In the moments when i wasn't watching; when i wasn't paying attention. It was there. It was here. Just because it wasn't boxed up in that intense angsty teenage hormone induced craziness, doesn't mean it didn't exist.

Our love is the love I've always wanted, I was just too dense to see it. I let romance movies and fantasies misguide my views. Instead of looking at what i had, I chased the past and let my own imagination tell me that because i didn't have those things that i wasn't happy. But sometimes the past belongs behind you and movies belong on the screen. I didn't want a fantasy or a dream, i want reality. I want my boyfriend falling asleep on my shoulder. I want my love surprising me with cookies because he remembered i love them. I want Kris holding my hand and promising to be home for snuggles. I just want Kris. That's all i ever wanted but i disregarded him to chase after an idea that we needed to have this epic, life altering addiction to one another.

Love doesn't always disappear with time and it doesn't get stale when you get comfortable. Sometimes love changes; evolves. As you become another person; growing into the person you're meant to be, it's only natural that the love you need changes too. The love Kris and i had wasn't dead, it just changed, and instead of talking and reconnecting we just assumed it disappeared. We both still loved one another, we just failed to reassure the other of that. We know better now.

I know that Kris's love for me had changed to fit me; us. I hadn't noticed, but i see it now. This fits and gods it feels so good. This love is so much of everything i didn't know i wanted.

When i glance sideways at my precious, still asleep, boyfriend, i realize that this is what I've needed all along. Easy. Comfortable. Reassuring. Humbling. Completing. Home.

>>>>>>>>

Chickens!!

Hey guys!! I finally got the Tori's out. It's basically just fluff, but i felt it appropriate for their story. Honestly after i finished the XiuChen, i had nothing planned out for this. Like nothing. I kept opening up the chapter and staring at the blank page like ...🤨 haha i usually pride myself on having an outline for the next chapter before i publish a current one, but when it came to this chapter i was kind of lost on what to do. So, it took a bit to get some inspiration and get it out.

Inevitably i love writing these characters because each story is unique in its own way, but TaoRis always comes a tad harder for me because of the raw feelings and fragile nature of their relationship, so it takes me a minute to think of where i want their story to go and in turn, end up. So it took a hot minute, but here it is, my dears.

Also, life update: I'm back in Daegu. The semester has started here at my university and I'm doing pretty good. Winter has given way to spring here in South Korea and my mood has significantly bettered. For those of you who don't know, i battle with some pretty serious seasonal depression and i think this year was a bit harder because I'm far from home and the familiar, but i adapted and I'm doing a lot better.

Anyways, I'll see you guys next time. BaekYeol is up next. See you soon.

사랑해 💕

~M~