~Sehun~

"Hyung, stop fussing" I whine while slapping Tao's ever persistent hands away from my shirt collar.

Tao shoots me a death glare and ignores my protests, slapping my hands back and inserting dominance over the shirt. I easily let him have it, used to giving power to my overbearing mother of a best friend. "We have to make you look good for your first date. Stop fidgeting."

I roll my eyes and push down the want to stomp my foot, knowing it'll only add fuel to his fire for treating me like a child. "It's not a date." I mumble pathetically, unable to push down the hope in my voice.

"Two grown ass men, going to a café to talk and get to know one another... sounds like a date to me." Tao points out with his own particular brand of sass.

A sigh releases from my lips, avoiding Tao's heavy gaze when it lands on me instead of the structure of my shirt collar. "Luhan made it clear that this wasn't a date."

Tao blinks steadily, staring deep into my eyes like he's viewing a piece of my soul, and knowing him, he probably is. "Don't let this boy hurt you, Hunnie. I've taught you better than this. You've been through so much. As your best friend I've always been beside you, and I will always be beside you if you need me, but please... please don't set yourself up for heartbreak. I don't want to have to pick my little brother up off the floor again."

"You can't protect me from everything, Hyung." I say softly, knowing he's speaking truth from his heart right now and is trusting me to listen to his feelings and concerns.

"Watch me. I will wrap your ass in bubble tape, Oh Sehun." Tao says in a sassier tone and I know he's stuffed his emotions back down.

I reach out and grab Tao's hands still attached to my shirt and squeeze them in the palms of my own. "Have you ever watched a bad storm and thought that it was so beautiful it became mesmerizing? Even though you know in the back of your mind that it's getting rough and you should go inside, you can't look away... can't bring yourself to leave even when it isn't safe? In that moment, you kind of feel that you wouldn't mind being destroyed by something so completely entrancing... that you just kind of accept your fate."

My best friends face is a mixture of understanding and concern when I finally focus back on him. "But you always decide at the last minute to go back inside, Sehun. Please, Hunnie.... If the storm gets too bad, then go back to where it's safe."

I regard the man who is basically the only family I have in my life and take his words into my heart, understanding that I might be standing in front of the calm before the storm.

>>>>

~Luhan~

I can't believe I actually agreed to this. All of the energy I spent trying to keep away from this boy, to keep this boy away from me, completely ruined just because the kid managed to find my weakness for puppy eyes and coffee. I had everything under control, I could actually see him giving up, but one moment of weakness and I was actually agreeing to be the brats friend.

So here I am, sitting across the table from enemy number one, silently and a bit awkwardly sipping at our coffee's. (well, Sehun got a bubble tea... I think he might be an actual child.) It's not fair either that the kid looks ridiculously good in his light blue dress shirt and overly tight black dress pants, which accentuates all of his... curves. (Like seriously, he must pad his ass, there's no way that an ass like this is natural.) I feel so underdressed and under matched sitting across from this model like boy, who I swear just walked out of a Louis Vuitton photo shoot.

I shift in my seat and clear my throat, needing to at least make small talk. I hate silence more than anything, having experienced too much of it in my lifetime.

"So, how are your classes going?" I ask, causing Sehun to cringe a little. Clearly Sehun isn't fond of small talk, or maybe his classes are just going that bad.

"Fine." he mumbles, closing his body in on itself, as if he's trying to make himself smaller. I get the sense that Sehun isn't used to being the center of attention. For some reason this makes me feel kind of sad. "I have an art teacher who is pushing me a little hard, but I think that's just because he knows I can do better than I am."

I smile at that, glad to see Sehun understands at least concepts like this. Maybe he isn't a complete toddler.

"Well, maybe you need to push yourself as well. You're only as good as you allow yourself to be." I mention, causing Sehun to look up into my eyes for a brief second before deflecting quickly. Cute, I find myself internally commenting before catching it. I'm quick to chastise those types of thoughts, and move to change the subject before I think too hard on it. "Spring break is coming up soon, are you going to go home?"

Sehun shakes his head, frowning down at the table. "Tao won't be there, so there's no reason to. I'll probably stay on campus with Yixing hyung and binge watch Netflix, maybe pick up some extra hours at work."

I blink a few times and cock my head in confusion. Why would Tao be at Sehun's home? Are they related? Sehun never mentioned it before. "You live with Tao?"

The younger nods, and absentmindedly sips from his straw. "I have since freshman year of high school."

My jaw clenches without my permission and I clear my throat trying to hide unwarranted feelings. I swallow down jealousy, telling myself it's because he got to move away from home at such a young age, and as a light as I can, ask, "So, um... You and Tao are close?"

Sehun smiles briefly, causing the clenching in my gut to intensify. "He's my best friend and brother at the same time. I owe a lot to him. Tao's even the one who convinced me to go to college... I wasn't exactly motivated to go myself. Tao and Kris are really like the only real parents I've ever had, unless you account Baekhyun's mom, who basically took me in as one of his own when I got hired at SuJu. He'll probably do the same to you, so prepare for that."

I cast the warning away, already aware of Heechul and his overbearing ways. It's one of the reasons my mother and he get along so well. I'd rather keep from Baekhyun the fact that our parents are close for as long as I can.

"Kris is?" I ask, picking up another piece of information. This is the first time I'm hearing Sehun talk about the blond giant.

Sehun sips at his tea, seeming comfortable talking about these people, rather than himself. "Kris is Tao's boyfriend, though you might as well call him his husband. They've been together for as long as I can remember, and just have this perfect relationship. They have the type of connection anyone would be jealous over."

"I see." I say simply, pushing away any negative thoughts as I realize just how important Tao is to Sehun... It might also make it better to know that Tao is already taken, but I try not to dwell on that thought too much.

"So... I know you came here on scholarship, but why did you decide to come all the way to Korea?" Sehun asks abruptly, startling me at how thought out the question is.

My lungs suck in a deep breath, readying myself for this explanation. "Because it's the farthest my parents would let me go by myself. I tried to get them to let me go to the states, but they weren't even about to even consider that. My parents are a bit overprotective of me, and are kind of controlling. I figured maybe some distance will help them let go and allow me to gain some independence."

Sehun smiles at that, and I curse my heart for fluttering all stupidly. "How's that working out?"

I roll my eyes on autopilot. "They call twice a day, and demand that I skype twice a week... last week my mother asked if I was having regular bowl movements." I sigh and run a hand through my hair, noticing Sehun's gaze following the movement. "It's almost worse than when I was living at home. I feel like they are constantly looking over my shoulder, hovering and analyzing every inch of my life. They even get regular reports from my teachers." Sehun chuckles, and I reach over slapping his arm. "Don't laugh at me. It's terrible having overbearing parents. My mom sent me a pack of condoms yesterday because I told them I became friends with a couple of guys in a fraternity. She lectured me for hours on the practices of safe sex and described STDs in vivid detail.... I might never have sex again."

Sehun doubles over, his laughter high pitched and somehow musical. I want to feel offended, but at the same time I can't help to feel amused by it as well. I can kind of see the amusement in it now that I'm thinking about it, and I quickly join Sehun in laughing at it.

"What about your parents?" I question, once we calm back down. It's kind of something I've been dying to know about for a while now. Sehun has hinted that something isn't quite normal with his home situation, if living with Tao since the beginning of high school is any indication.

I regret the question as soon as Sehun's face drops, and an uncomfortable, maybe even a little despairing look graces his eyes. "You don't have to talk about it, Sehun. I didn't mean to pry"

The younger boy, (who seems to have just lost a couple of years with how vulnerable he looks right now) sadly smiles and shakes his head. "It's okay. It's not really complicated. They kicked me out for being gay."

This information causes my stomach to kick painfully, followed by an uncomfortable tightening in my chest. That's just so wrong.

"Shit, I'm sorry, Sehun. I just went on and on about my parents being too doting in me when yours..." I stop and bite at my lip.

Sehun smiles sadly, his eyebrows pinching and my heart might as well be in a fucking vise. "It's okay. I'm happy you have good parents and even if they annoy you, at least you know they love you."

I almost want to cry at his words. I don't understand how anyone could turn away such a loveable, kind, and gentle soul. Sehun is an amazing kid that any parent should be proud to have, and yet his parents threw him away because he loves differently than them. I feel a bit outraged, and kind of want to hit something, but instead I choose to ignore the voice of better judgment in the back of my head and reach across the table to set a hand on top of Sehun's.

Sehun blinks steadily at me, before turning his hand palm up, and lacing our fingers together. A barrage of emotions rush through me, startling a little gasp from between my lips. I abruptly pull my hand out of his grasp (which was startlingly light, as if he was waiting for me to do so), and stand up.

Sehun's eyes widen and he looks panicked as if he's ready for me to make a run for it, and that's exactly what I would like to do at the moment. The hurt simmering on the edges of his eyes keeps my feet rooted to the floor though, unable to cause this child anymore pain.

"I-I need to get another drink" I say lamely, holding up my cup and quickly walking to the counter.

I risk a glance back at Sehun as the barista confusedly refills my half full cup, and instantly wish that I hadn't. He looks crushed and bile rises in my throat at the knowledge that I'm the one who put it there. It's no secret how Sehun feels about me, but it was always so easy to ignore his advances and heart shaped stares. So why is it do different now? Why is it that for the first time, I want to give in to Oh Sehun?

>>>>

~Sehun~

Luhan sits back down in front of me, seeming cautious, but also a light of curiosity and excitement in his eyes. Something seems to have shifted in his mood, and I wish I knew what he was thinking. Of course, I had expected Luhan to turn me down, but that doesn't mean it burned any less when he ripped his hand away like I had set it on fire. For a second I had let myself get caught up in his comfort, but as usual Luhan keeps me at arm's length, even with how much lean-way we've made in getting closer today. It's frustrating trying to break into Luhan's steal platted and padlocked heart.

"So, what's your major?" I ask stupidly, not knowing what else to say to pass over the awkwardness I caused.

Luhan's eyebrows raise, but a small smile pulls at his perfect lips, seemingly amused. "Sports medicine" he says casually. "I'm here on a football (soccer for you Americans) scholarship, but my actual focus is medicine. My mother is a doctor, so I guess I'm kind of following her footsteps in my own way"

A nod follows automatically, actually interested in his choice of major. "Why sports medicine, though? You could do anything within sports. You could be a physical Trainor, or maybe even go pro."

The grin that graces Luhan's face is nearly breathtaking, clearly in his element here. "There's just something about the medicine that's fascinating to me. I know I'll sound like my mom here, but bodies are amazing at what they can do, and when you add an athletic sensibility to them, they become that much more entrancing. The limits that athletes can push their bodies and capabilities to... it's amazing. Plus, sports injuries are a lot more understandable to me, because of my own experiences. I just want to explore the medical side of all of it, it's a personal passion of mine."

I can't help but be absorbed into Luhan's excitement for his focus. He seems generally excited and in love with his major and I want him to succeed as if it were my own. Luhan's beautiful like this. He has a burn in his eyes, a desire for something he's enthralled about. It makes my heart clench and I know I'm falling even further for him.

"So, what's your major?" Luhan asks, his eyes still sparkling.

I pause, never really realizing that this question always comes with a counter question. I've noticed that this is the one question that college kids like to ask one another. When you're talking to a classmate, or getting to know someone on campus, that question always seems to pop up, and it's one that I dread the most.

"I'm undeclared actually." I mumble, hiding a bit of my embarrassment behind a sip of my drink.

Luhan forms a cute little "o" with his mouth, while widening his eyes. "Really?" He asks, sounding dumbfounded. "I could have sworn that you were an art major. I mean, I always see you carrying a sketch pad, and some sort of art supplies. Plus, you tend to always be covered in chalk, led, or paint to some degree... I just assumed."

I rub my hands across my pants awkwardly and clear my throat. "Well uh... I take a lot of art classes willingly, for like electives... but I'm just taking general studies right now."

Luhan tilts his head, his eyes swimming with questions, but thankfully asks none of them. Instead Luhan talks about China, and how his life was there; his friends, and his hobbies, even including more stories about his overbearing, but somehow open minded mother, that I must admit are hysterical. Luhan asks more about the guys, and my friendship with Tao, seeming a little warmed up to my best friend now. Luhan's questions are careful, but clearly eager to actually get to know me, and with each question that he gives seemingly interested feedback on, my chest gets tighter. It's almost like he's actually giving me a shot here.

The conversation runs smoothly, and before we know it, the streetlights come on outside, and the little coffee shop begins to clear out of students calling it a night. We quickly decide to do the same and end up standing on the sidewalk just outside, watching the last bit of sun kissed on the horizon descend fully. Luhan and I stand in silence for a few minutes, acknowledging that we need to part ways now, but neither one seeming to want to do so.

Luhan turns to me with a smile and seems like he's about to suggest something, when a loud, obnoxious call of Luhan's name rings through the air. Luhan's eyes widens and he almost looks panicked, as a very beautiful girl hurries up to us and slings an arm around his shoulders.

I don't know Chinese well enough to understand everything with how fast the girl talks, but I catch a few words, along with some endearments that are clearly not meant for friends. I search Luhan's eyes for clarification, and his answer back with a clear apology.

"Luhan, who is this?" I ask, keeping my tone light and unassuming.

The older winces and pulls the girl, currently attached like a leach and trying to burrow herself into his neck. "This is... m-my.."

"I'm his girlfriend. My name is Amy." The girl says in accented Korean not nearly as attractive as Luhan's. The girl straightens up and lets go of Luhan, before presenting a hand to me.

I had already guessed. My mind knew what this situation was, but someone forgot to tell my heart, and by the way it clenches, it's not taking the news so well. "I'm Sehun. It's nice to meet you."

She nods and grins brightly. "Same. Thanks for taking care of my Hannie, today. I'll take him off your hands, now, though."

I smile back tightly and know that it looks forced, but I can't help it through the pain currently ripping its way through my body. "Of course, we were just about to part ways. We're done. Right, Luhan?"

Luhan blinks at me wide eyed, his face a mixture of panic and apprehension. His lack of an answer though gives me all the one I need, and I'm quick to step back. "Goodbye, Luhan." I say and turn around, needing to get home... needing my brothers.

>>>>

~Luhan~

"That's him?" Amy asks, turning to me, and giving me a scrutinizing gaze.

I sigh and move to lean against the front of the café. "I'm pretty sure I just saw his heart break."

Amy leans next to me and pats my arm. "Are you sure you want this? I saw you two in the café and that's the happiest I've seen you in a long time, Lu."

I rake a hand down my face and blow out a frustrated breath. "It's for the best. He can do better than me."

Amy stands up and spins around to face me. "Lu Han, listen to me and listen to me good. You may be family but I will not hesitate to slap the stupid right out of you. I will do anything to protect you, which is why I agreed to do this, but so help me gods, I will not stand for a pity party. Anyone would be lucky to have you and it's no wonder that boy is a mess over you."

I swallow thickly and look up into her all-knowing eyes. "I think I'm a mess over him too, Amy."

Her face softens and she reaches out to pet my cheek comfortingly. "I know, Hannie... I know."

I allow Amy to comfort me and sit there for a few minutes, staring off into the distance where Sehun had nearly ran away earlier. I just wanted to come to Korea to get away from everything, to finally breath a lungful of fresh air for once, and instead I find air constantly stuck in my throat. I wanted to focus on my studies and myself, but here I am, constantly wrapped up in the feelings of someone else and worried if he's even made it home alright.

"I'm screwed, aren't i?" I ask pathetically, somehow wishing that she'd lie to me for once in her life.

"Oh yeah. Majorly, cousin." Amy says, patting my shoulder sympathetically.

I sigh and nod my head in defeat, while mentally voicing the only word I can use to describe my feeling at this moment. "Fuck."

>>>>

~Sehun~

The street stretches before me, dark and still, as I make the track home on autopilot. Of course the one person my heart decided to reach out to, is unobtainable to me. Fate is an amusing heartless bitch that way. The stone faced, unemotional Oh Sehun, finally desires someone, and they want nothing to do with him. 'It's fitting', I think. It was almost too good to be true to think that someone actually wanted me... was willing to love me.

You'd think that rejection is something I'd be used to by now, but the ache in my chest and abdomen tells me that this hurts just as much, if not more than the others. And I can't even blame Luhan. I was the stupid one. I was the one who got my hopes up and let myself believe that I actually had a shot at happiness. Luhan was clearly taking pity on me by humoring my advances and agreeing to be my friend... I was just a sort of charity to him. How pathetic.

The house comes into view, and emotions well up inside of me. The only people I have ever had care about me without conditions, without sympathy. My brothers love me, and I know they do from how they've proved it time and time again. I wonder why they put up with me? Why they love me? What do they see in me that is worth their love? I don't deserve my Hyungs.

I shuffle slowly up the walkway and stop in front of the stairs, staring at the letter posted on the front of the house, wondering what I'm doing here. I've never been the social type. In high school, I had Tao, Kris, and even Baekhyun and Chanyeol... but if they hadn't had insisted on following me around or dragging me everywhere, I know our friendships would have died. I've always been content to be alone, having had a lot of experience with it when I was growing up. And yet, I rely on these guys, I see these people as my family, and they've taken me in as their own... but why? Why do they give me love when I'm not even worth their time?

I lower my head, staring at the ground, before my attention is caught by the sound of the front door opening. I lift my head and am greeted by the worried, and caring eyes of my best friend.

"Hunnie?" Tao asks, his head sticking out of the slightly ajar door.

"Hyung?" I rasp, my throat suddenly feeling way to thick. Tao's eyes hold caution, but seem to urge me to say what I need to say. "Can... can I come inside now?"

Tao's face falls, and his eyes close in a pained expression, but he quickly pulls himself together and he throws open the door. "Of course, Hunnie. Always."

I nearly run into Tao's arms and bury my head in his neck before I feel the tears start to run. Tao rubs my back, holding me close, and soon those arms multiply, until I'm wrapped in a heavy cocoon of arms and warmth. I don't know which hyungs have joined the hug or even how many of them, but it doesn't matter. They are here and that's all I want right now. To be enveloped in the love and support of my family, my brothers, makes me forget that I was even in pain at all.

I may not understand why they love me, but they do. They love me enough to make the ache turn into a small thumping pain. These guys are my family, my home... and if the storm gets too bad, I know i can always go home.

>>>>

Chickens!
It's been a while hasn't it? Sorry about that, but school is kicking my ass this semester. I'm happy though, and I'm actually in a really good place.

Here's HunHan for you. I hope you guys liked it. Sorry it's kind of heavy, but Sehun's story and self view is kind of skewed. The kids been through a lot, but stay with me, it'll get better.

You guys know the drill, questions, comments, or concerns, just sent them my way. XiuChen is up next! See you guys next time! 😊

Kisses 😘

사랑해 ❤

~M~