When I break will you watch will you save me from this dark I've put myself in. The dark surrounds me my scars go deep into my body I feel them when I walk around the left cave I hide in I no longer see only feeling around the dark world I once knew I only steal now when I can. Star clan refuses to let me join them when I rest I rarely force myself to return to the territory I called home. How could I let them see me when I can't see me which relaxes me I don't want to know what i have become a small skinny broken warrior I was loyal to all now all I want is silence. I listen to the forest live on I keep my eyes closed now when I do open them everything is blurred. I close them back going back to my thoughts I hide from my own mate scared of she saw me she'd run from what I have become I no longer fight I run...fast I soon learn clan scents dark forest cats scents are strange but easy to catch there scents are of blood and death. I hide when I scent them I ran from my sister for the first time not knowing it was her her scent had changed so much it use to be sweet and calming now it reminds me of death and my fear when she chases after hugging me I stiffen expecting a bite or claw to the chest or face only to get a hug I relax reliving its her voice I hear her voice is cracky crying...we both know how I'm living will kill me. But knowing what awaits me in the clans keeps me away knowing thrush know owns dream clan scares me I don't think I have ever felt her claws but I do remember how they look her skills are great for a leader that should he elder for her age Going crazy no longer bothers me for its to late I sleep to hide from the pain of breathing if I could stand I would but I stay down knowing if I try I'll fall back down. Sometimes I think I can see a figure coming to me a male with a dork smile I tilt my head to him watching him pounce playfully then race towards me disappearing into the wind the sun shines in me once in while I think life over things I think or know are my fault moons blind eye.....Ever's death hunts me he died with out me there sly was there for me in med den were I should have been caring for both of them giving sly someone to go to. But I was hiding I was a coward...and still I'm Moons eyes was a my fault I was young and angry at the world I believed she should listen to me I knew best but learned I didn't I can no longer see but I can still see her scars voices race in my mind telling me making sure I knew I was a loser and weak.

So when I break.....who will stop my pain....