Erik's POV-

I sighed as I glanced over at Kat. She was staying completely silent while playing with her food. It was what she had been doing all week. All week long, even after our discussion a couple days before when she confided in me, she had been acting subdued and distant.

Nothing that I said helped. No matter what reassurances I tried to give her, it didn't matter. She still constantly looked like she wanted to cry, she was drained, and she was upset. I hated that I couldn't pull her out of the depression and regression that she was stuck in.

"Thank God that this is the last day before break. I can't stand this place," Chris exclaimed. "Bruh, I can't wait for Thanksgiving! Your momma's cooking is worth the year long wait," he continued. "Just you wait, Kat, you're gonna be blown away by all the food."

"Great," Kat said through gritted teeth as she stabbed at the food in front of her.

She had been weird about Thanksgiving ever since I had asked her to join my family. She had been weird about all of it. She was stuck. She was completely stuck in the cycle of self-deprecation that she had been trained to feed into.

The bell rang, making her jump violently. Everyone at our lunch table stared at her, but she ignored them completely. She simply gathered up her uneaten food, grabbed her backpack, and walked to the trashcan to dispose of the food that she refused to even consider eating.

I watched her as she walked away. She hadn't even looked back to see if I was following her. She simply walked away. She was stuck in her mind that was leading her down a path that I was worried would lead her too far away from me and everyone else.

"What's wrong with her? Is she okay?" Nia asked me quietly as Kat disappeared from my sight to her next class.

I sighed. "I don't know," I answered her truthfully. "I really don't know if she's okay."

Nia didn't reply. She just touched my shoulder softly and walked away to her next class. She didn't know what to say. I mean, what was there to actually say?

I stayed in the same place until the next bell startled me out of my reverie. I was worried. No, I was fucking terrified. Kat's behavior was scaring me. I didn't know what to do. Out of all the pamphlets that I had read, none of them had prepared me. They had touched on reversion, depression, anxiety, and breakdowns, but they didn't prepare me for it actually happening. I did the only thing that I could think of doing, I called Kat's therapist.

"Dr. Perry's office," the receptionist answered.

"Um..." I had no idea what to say. "I... Is there any way that I can speak to Dr. Perry? It's kind of important."

"She's at lunch right now. Can I take a message?"

"Um... Well, my name is Erik Jones. I'm calling about Katherine Reynolds. She's... I don't know how to describe it. I'm worried about her," I tried to explain.

"Are you afraid she'll hurt herself? Is she in immediate danger? Is she a threat to herself or others?"

"Not immediately, no. I..." I sighed I had no idea what I was even saying.

"Let me see if she's available to talk to you real quick. She can best decide on what to direct you to do," the receptionist said before she put me on hold.

As I waited for someone to get back on the phone with me, I exited the school. I didn't want to be overheard by anyone. Plus, I was already super late for class, so I didn't really see the point in trying to go. My main concern was Katherine at that moment; I didn't really give a shit about missing English or whatever other class.

"Erik?" Dr. Perry's voice filled my ear as I rushed to my car.

"Dr. Perry," I sighed in relief.

"My receptionist said that you're worried about Kat. What's going on? What has you so worried? Is she okay?"

"She's regressing," I answered.

"That happens a lot. We can't expect her to be good all of the-"

"No," I cut her off. "She's pulling away from me, not eating, running on autopilot, and I'm afraid she'll do something drastic soon. It's getting really bad; I can see it in her eyes," I whispered.

"She did seem off last session," Dr. Perry sighed. "She has group today; I'll have a one-on-one session with her afterwards."

"Thank you," I said feeling relieved. "I don't know what I would do if something happened to her. I'm just worried."

"I'll see what I can do. Sometimes people regress, Erik. We just have to let her know that she is loved through it and that we are still proud of her," she told me.

"Okay, I'll remember that," I agreed before I hung up and rested my head on the steering wheel.

I was proud of her. She was breaking through the abusive and awful way of life that her parents forced upon her. She was doing so good, and I really needed to tell her that more often. She was spectacular. She always has been and always would be to me.

----

I breathed a sigh of relief when I finally got out of T's Escalade. We had been out far too long. He had me messing people up, selling dope to kids that were just a little bit older than Nia, and collecting money for not screwing with people and their businesses around the neighborhood. I hated doing T's bidding. I hated it even more that I stood against pretty much everything that the fool profited from.

"You did good, kid," T praised me as we walked through the garage and into the already popping house party.

Without fail, every Friday, Saturday, quite a few weeknights, even some holidays there was a party in full swing at T's house. I hated that I had to attend them. There were too many people, way too many drugs, and not mention that T was always there trying to lock his eyes on his next prey.

"You're quickly earning your brother's old name for most brutal. Must run in the family," he said as he did a bump of coke off his pinky. "Want a hit?"

"No," I denied. "I'm gonna go clean up real-"

"Hold up, hold up, my man," T stopped me and guided me to his 'VIP' area that he always sat at during the part to scope women and others out easily. In reality, it was just a couch and a love seat pushed against a wall with some lights strung around it. It wasn't anything special really. "Come have a beer with me. Come chill. Wear your trophies around like badges. You're a savage, my dude... Act like it. Be proud of that shit. A lot of females really feed on that type of shit."

"Not mine," I answered instantly, reminding him that I had a girl. "But yeah, I'll have a beer with you. No problem," I brushed off quickly.

"Oh, you're still with the snow bunny?" T asked. "Must be great in bed."

I gritted my teeth and pretended to gulp down my beer to not answer any of his questions. I wanted Kat as far out of his mind as possible. She didn't belong anywhere near that place... mind, body, or soul.

I nursed my beer for twenty minutes before I could get away from T. I had to deny three lap dances, one blowjob, and countless offers of drugs and more alcohol. I was literally just counting down the minutes until I could leave. Unfortunately, over an hour was about the amount of time that I usually had to stay before it was deemed appropriate to leave. That sucked because I wanted to be just about anywhere other than there.

As soon as I made it to the bathroom, I locked myself in there and cleaned myself up as much as possible. I unbuttoned the top shirt that I had on to reveal my clean undershirt, I threw the bloodied shirt in the trash, then washed my face and hands thoroughly. Still... I could only see how tainted I was with the blood of people that I hurt.

Finally, after my hands were all raw and dry, I pulled out my silenced phone to see that Kat had called me four times. I had let her down four times while I was out working for T. Four times.

I quickly called her back, and I could instantly hear the uneasiness in her voice. I could make out the rawness and slight cracks in her words indicating that she had been crying. I could feel her trying to push me away and shut me and my questions down as if she were standing in front of me. She was not okay.

The call was like being doused in cold water. Nothing else mattered except her. I had to get to her, and I had to help her. I didn't know what happened, but I knew that she needed someone to simply love her. Someone needed to hold her so that she'd know that it would be okay. I needed to get to her because I needed her.

When I slammed my way out of the bathroom and through the living room, I hadn't really been paying attention. I was just going. Honestly, the people I was walking through, the people I was ignoring, the drinks that I was spilling, didn't matter to me even in the least. I was only worried for Kat.

"Where you going, G?" T asked me just before I made it to the front door.

I sighed in annoyance. "I've gotta bounce. I have an emergency," I said with a shrug. There was no way that even he would get me to stay.

"Come on, bro... The party barely started. We ain't even having fun yet," T said as he shoved a bottle of liquor my way.

"I appreciate that, but I've gotta go. Something came up. Next time for sure, promise," I told him as I tried to turn away again.

"Are you fucking kidding me? After all the shit that I've done for you?"

"Come on, it ain't like that. I've gotta go check on someone. I told you, T... You've got my loyalty," I tried to convince.

"It's your snow bunny?"

"Yeah... There's an emergency with my girl. I gotta go."

"Ight. Go take care of your pretty little thing. I'll remember this though, Erik. I'll remember this, and you know I will," T said as he walked back towards the VIP area.

I rushed my way to my car. I knew that T really would remember, but I couldn't find it in me to care. Something was going on with Kat, and just that stupid little spat with T costed me valuable time that I could have been using to help her.

----

You know what I had never noticed? How far away Kat's house was from mine especially when I was in a rush to get to it. When I finally pulled into her driveway, parking right behind her red Jetta, I could barely contain my anxious energy.

I wasn't completely sure what had me so on edge. I mean, I didn't really think that Kat would purposefully do anything to fatally harm herself. However, I also knew from previous experiences with her, particularly when she was upset, she didn't tend to make the best coping decisions.

I rang the doorbell, knocked on the door, and even called her several times. A full five minutes went by without her coming to the door, so I simply put in the security code that Kat had told me before and let myself into her house.

It was completely silent in the vast house. Barely any lights were on, no music or TV was going like it normally would be if Kat were there by herself, even her bag and shoes weren't strewn across the entry way like she usually liked to do after school. I had an uneasy feeling burning in my gut.

I quickly ran up the stairs to her room and knocked only a couple of times before I barged through the halfway opened door. I gasped when took in the state of the room. Things were strewn everywhere, clothes looked like they had been tried on and then practically ripped off, her bed was a mess, and then her scale that was usually in the restroom had obviously been thrown against the wall, creating a crater-like hole in the drywall, and it laid broken into pieces on the ground underneath the hole.

Still... Kat was nowhere to be found. Where was she?!

I got my phone back out and tried to call her again. I prayed that she'd answered. I needed her to answer.

My hope was brutally shattered when I heard her phone ringing inside the room that I was already in.

"Fuck!" I cursed aloud before storming out of the room and rushing around the rest of the vast house while calling her name.

Nowhere. She was nowhere.

I frantically rushed to my car. I had no idea where to go. I had no idea where she would have gone especially on foot at night.

I sped to the gate and asked the guard if he had seen Kat tonight. Luckily, it was the same guard that Kat had chewed out that first night that I took her home, he certainly remembered me because of that. Thankfully, that made him tell me which way, on a run, he helpfully added that she had gone about forty-five minutes before.

Unfortunately, that had let me know exactly which way she was going, and it was absolutely nowhere good. Not good at all.

A/n-

Hey y'all! Once again, I'm too tired to edit. Sorry! 🤦‍♀️ Let me know wat you thought though!Thank you for reading! Don't forget to vote, comment, and share!

-KAF❤️