Polite. Considerate. Gentleman. Kent.

Bilugan ang naiiba.

I know I said I wanted him to change and be a little more reserved pero ngayong nagbago na sya, para namang may mali. He almost comes off as pretentious because he's trying so hard to be someone that he's not and will never be, not even in a million years.

I thought that his true self was the Kent that he was when he was with Kiele. Ngayon narealize ko na... hindi pala. Maybe he's already in his true self when he's with me.

Nakakapanibago sya and although his change seemed to sit well with my father, I was bothered out of my wits. For I did not fall for the polite, considerate and gentlemanly Kent.

It's only been a few days and I'm already sick of his new attitude. The only time na nakikita ko 'yung fun side nya e kapag nagti-text sya sa 'kin. I tried to lure him out of his hypocrisy by wearing sexy and provocative outfits. He compliments them alright. It just bugs me that he had to ask for permission to compliment me every freaking time.

Since it's Friday, I decided to dress up for him. Heels kung heels. Dress kung dress. Ang gulo ko lang. Kung kelan sinunod nya na 'yung gusto ko, saka ko naman hinahanap 'yung dating sya. Hindi rin pala nakakatuwa kapag kontrolado mo ang boyfriend mo. Para na lang silang puppet na susunod sa lahat ng gusto mo. You just have to pull some strings for them to do what you want.

Black mini-dress ang isinuot ko. See through 'yong bandang itaas. Pinalooban ko 'yon ng tube. Four inches above the knee ang skirt. Tapos naka-ankle boots ako na kulay black, three inches ang heels. Itinali ko ang buhok ko tapos iniipit ko 'yung bangs since mahaba na naman sya. And then I finished the outfit with red lipstick. Bihirang-bihira akong mag-lipstick lalo na on a normal day. I even polished my nails last night. I colored them red. Can I say that this is an act of desperation already?

Kahit ang tatay ko at ang dalawa kong kuya, hindi maalis ang tingin sa 'kin. Ngayon lang kasi nila ako nakitang nag-ayos ng ganito. Dati, mag-iiyakan pa kami ng nanay ko bago ako nito mapagsuot ng dress.

When Kent called out from outside, lahat sila ay sumunod sa 'kin sa pagsalubong sa kanya. Probably to see how he would react upon seeing me. Hindi naman sila nabigo. I'm pretty sure he was dumbstruck for about two minutes or so.

Nasa loob na kami ng kotse nya pero hindi pa rin sya makapagsalita.

"Come on," I said, rolling my eyes. "It's just a little makeup."

"It's distracting." His eyes lingered on my legs. I consciously tugged the skirt down but it's no use. Lalo talaga syang umiiksi kapag nakaupo ako. I gave up my futile attempt. I looked back at him and he was still looking at my legs. See? It's working already.

"Tumatakbo ang oras pero 'yong kotse mo hindi."

"I'm distracted," dahilan nya. He wasn't even hiding the fact that he's ogling at me. "Am I crossing the line already?"

"What do you think?"

He sighed and looked ahead. He started the engine and started driving.

"Sorry," he said a while later.

"It's okay. Just drive. We'll talk later."

Later came and he was already at the lobby of the office by 5pm.

"Let's have dinner?" he asked. Nang tumango ako, ikinawit nya sa braso nya ang kamay ko tapos sabay kaming bumaba ng elevator. "Why are you dressed like that by the way?" tanong nya maya-maya.

"Can't I dress like this?" pabalik kong tanong.

"It's out of character."

"Out of character? That sounds familiar."

Pagkalabas ng elevator, naglakad na kami patungo sa kotse nya. My hand's still clinging on his arm. Hindi sya nagrereklamo na nangangalay na sya. He even opened the car's door for me. Hindi talaga ako mapakali kapag ganito sya kabait.

I buckled the seatbelt and waited for him to get in the car. When he did, nagsalita ako agad. "Kent, we need to talk."

"Fire away."

"Say something bad. Something nasty."

He frowned at me. "What for?"

"Basta. Dali na. Say something perverted."

"Like 'I really want to fuck you' kind of perverted?"

Okay. That's a bit too much but okay...

"T-Tone it down." I gave him a just-a-little gesture.

"How toned down? Can I be honest with you, Jazz?" Nang tumango ako ay nagpatuloy sya "I had to adjust my boxers several times today."

Pakiramdam ko sinilaban ang pisngi ko. Pinandilatan ko sya.

"What? I told you, you're distracting," natatawa nyang sabi.

"I didn't think I'm that distracting," I muttered.

"Well, you are. And I'm not the only guy who noticed that. Don't wear that dress again unless you're at home with me."

"O-Okay." Nag-iwas ako ng tingin. My cheeks are still burning when he started the car. The air felt warmer. I had the urge to turn the aircon to full blast.

"What do you want to talk about, anyway?"

"Ah yeah." Bumaling ako sa kanya and grimaced. "Just drop the pious act, will you? Hindi bagay sa 'yong maging ganyan kabait."

Naiiling syang bumuntong-hininga. "You don't like me when I'm like this and that. What am I to do? Palagi ka na lang may reklamo sa 'kin," he asked exasperatedly.

"Sorry na. Mas gusto ko 'yong natural na ikaw e. You were so uptight these past few days. Nakakailang ka halos kausapin."

"What? My boring self didn't sit well with you?" he asked, smirking.

Umiling ako. "You're like a dead fish," I answered.

"I thought you wanted me to be one."

"Hindi a. Ang gusto ko lang naman bawasan mo 'yong ano... 'yong pagiging ano mo." Peste. Hindi ko masabi 'yong H word. Alam nyang hindi ako sanay sa ganoon.

"Ano?" Ngumisi sya.

"Manyak," sabi ko na lang.

That made him laugh. "Only if you'll stop being so desirable."

"Me?" I scoffed. "I'm not desirable. Sabi nga nung dear mo plain ako e."

Bigla syang naging seryoso. "I'm not him. You're not plain to me."

Ah Kent, why do you have to be so mushy all of a sudden? Hindi ko na pala kailangang hilingin 'yon sa kanya. It'll come out when it needs to.

"I should get a reward for making you blush."

"I'm not blushing," tanggi ko naman.

"Yeah. And I am not perverted either."

The sarcasm! It came back! I smiled at him. "So what are we having for dinner?"

"Each other?" he answered saka sya tumawa nang simangutan ko sya. "I'm kidding. Sa Bistro Ravioli lang tayo. That okay with you?"

Tumango na lang ako.

At dinner, he was back to his old self. Maingay. Palaging may trivia tungkol sa mga pagkain. He's also making occasional green jokes in my expense. Pero mas masaya akong kasama ko 'yong ganitong Kent kesa doon sa Kent na kasama ko kahapon at noong isang araw. He's himself now, I can see that. And I would never ask him again to change himself.

"Lick me when I melt, will you?"

That was like a snap from my trance. "Huh?"

"Kanina ka pa nakatitig sa 'kin," he sad, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Sorry, I was just—"

"Distracted. I know." He smiled. "And I can't blame you."

"Yabang!"

His smile slowly turned to laughter.

My father already lifted the curfew a few weeks ago so gumala muna kami ni Kent. May event sa mall kaya tumambay muna kami doon para makinuod. A few minutes later though, hinila nya na ako paalis. He said that guys were looking at me and he didn't like it.

Kahit ayaw nyang amining nagseselos sya, hindi naman sya nahihiyang iparamdam sa 'kin na nagseselos sya. Ang cute cute nya lang. He was frowning every time na may lalaking magagawi ang tingin sa 'kin. Ganoon pala ang nagagawa ng konting makeup, heels at dress? I should dress up more often. No wonder ang daming nagkakandarapa kay Gale noong college.

Magsasarado na ang mall nang mapagpasyahan naming umuwi. On our way home, hindi pa rin sya tumigil sa mga green jokes nya. Parang naipon 'yong mga jokes na 'yon ng ilang araw at ngayon na alam nyang okay lang sa 'kin 'yon, saka nya ibinabanat lahat.

Sinasakyan ko naman 'yong ilan... para masaya.

Nang makarating kami sa bahay, inihatid nya ulit ako hanggang sa pintuan, kagaya ng palagi nyang ginagawa.

"Time to claim my reward."

"Take your time," I said with a smile.  Akala ko hahalikan nya 'ko. He's indeed full of surprises. Instead of kissing me, he took out his phone and took pictures of me.

"This might be the first and last time that I'll see you wear something like that. Para naman may remembrance," he explained then he pulled me by the waist and kissed my left cheek. "I don't want to ruin your lipstick. Bukas na lang ako maniningil," bulong nya.

I shivered all over. Oo nga pala, weekend bukas. Meaning, nasa bahay nya ako bukas.

"Sa bahay ka matulog bukas," dagdag pa nya.

"H-Ha?"

"Please?"

I frowned at him. "Kent, are we going through this again? I won't have sex with you. I won't have sex with anyone else until I'm married."

He shrugged it off. "Fine by me. Okay na 'ko sa makeout sessions." Nag-init ang mukha ko sa sinabi nya. More so when he added "We don't have to go all the way but we can do everything else, right?"

Mukhang naisahan nya na naman ako.

"W-What exactly do you mean by everything else?"

Bilang sagot, his lips trailed their way down my neck.

Kabado ako. Parang ayaw ko nang pumunta. Iba kasi sya e. Kahit inosente ang topic, nalilihis nya. Basta't kayang makalusot, lulusot sya. Parang ayaw ko na ngang tumuloy dahil baka hindi ko mapanindigan 'yong pangako ko sa sarili ko.

Kanina pa ako nag-iisip ng palusot. Hindi ko naman pwedeng sabihing bigla akong nagkasakit 'cause he could easily come over and know that I'm lying. Hindi ko rin pwedeng idahilan na hindi ako pinayagan ni tatay dahil medyo close na sila at kahit papaano ay nakakapagtanong sya sa tatay ko ng mga bagay tungkol sa 'kin. One phone call from him and he'll learn na hindi naman totoo na hindi ako pinayagan. Gagawin ko pang sinungaling ang tatay ko. Unless magsabi ako sa tatay ko na huwag akong payagang umalis, with which he'd gladly agree pero magtatanong ito kung ano ang problema. At hindi ko naman pwedeng sabihin 'yong mga tingin kong balak ni Kent dahil siguradong magbubuno sila ng tatay ko. Lalong hindi ko pwedeng sabihin na ayaw ko na palang pumunta dahil pamihadong magtatampo sya. And I don't want that. Nahihiya rin naman ako sa efforts nya these past few days.

Ang ending, dala ang isang maliit na bag na may lamang damit at toiletries, nag-commute ako papunta sa bahay nya. Hapon na nang pumunta ako. Hapon kasi ang uwi nya galing sa restaurant nila.

Saktong kakapasok ko lang sa loob—may sarili akong susi—nang dumating sya.

Everything went normally, well, Kent-normal. Noong gumabi lang ako medyo nabahala. He wanted me to sleep with him. As in literal na matutulog. Ang hindi ko lang sigurado ay kung wala syang gagawing iba bukod sa pagtulog.

"This bed had not seen any action since you've been here," he pointed out as he pinned me to his bed.

"And it will not see anymore action unless—"

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I know."

"Beds are made for sleeping, not for that porn inside your head."

"Beds have that functuality too."

"But not this time."

He grunted. He got off me, pulled me from the side and buried his face on the side of my neck.

He was just like that for a few minutes and I began wondering if he had fallen asleep on me. The occasional peck on the neck, however, suggested otherwise. "Kent?"

"Hm?"

Humarap ako sa kanya. "Thank you," I said while looking in his eyes.

He propped his head to his elbow and frowned, as if he could not fathom why I'm thanking him. Siguro 'yong mga ginagawa nyang normal para sa kanya, hindi niya alam kung gaano ka-espesyal para sa akin. "For what?"

I smiled as I cup his face. "For not making me regret my decision of staying with you."

Gumanti sya ng ngiti at yumuko para halikan ako.

"Good night, Jazz."