no one's gonna hurt you, love

--:--

Beep.

Time to go to the attic. I would much rather be in the Sanitorium, ironic as it sounds. But Anna is not in there anymore and Leah, although I would prefer not to admit it, scares me a bit. Also, I do not have a valid reason to go. The voices are quiet today.

I keep my slippers on today, as I walk up to the attic, Michael at my side. His hand, rested on my shoulder, sends warm tingles down my spine. I do not know why. Michael has started accompanying me regularly to the attic, rather than Jane. Change feels strange, unexpected, yet not entirely undesirable.

I reach for Michael's hand as we reach the top, pulling it off my shoulder and into my grasp. He steadies me. I lead the way to the windowsill, where I sit down. Michael sits beside me. I turn and stare outside. The green grass is blinding in the midst of white fences and white uniforms and white walls and white skies and I can barely breathe when I look at Michael again.

His face is strained and his posture stiff but he still manages a small smile. I try to smile back. I think Anna and Leah are rubbing off on me. My mouth curves upwards and I feel my lips stretching. I abandon the attempt when Michael starts to laugh. I frown.

What is so funny? Michael notices my sudden change in mood and thought and places his hand atop of mine. The warmth spreads up my arm. I shiver, despite the heat. When I look at Michael his brow is furrowed and his eyes are concentrated on mine in an expression I cannot discern. My chest suddenly feels like a hundred little butterflies have flown their way in. I do not understand. I pull my hand away from his the same time as something pulls on the back of my mind. The voices.

They scream at me, all at the same time. Only Anna has this effect on me. But she is not here. I look at Michael, a tugging feeling in my chest. And then I black out, with one last thought.

I guess I will be ending up in the Sanitorium anyways.

No dreams. That is the first thing I notice when I wake up in the Sanitorium. The lights are bright, as always. They keep from telling me the time of day. I lay and stare at the ceiling until the white lights are so blinding that I feel like my eyes have been seared off. Only then do I stand.

Strangely enough, Michael is not here. A gentle pulsing at the back of my head almost sends me collapsing to the tile floor. I sit back on the bed and put a hand to my head. Gently, I tap my forehead, as if it will send the voices away. I giggle. And giggle. I don't stop. Why won't they go away?

My laugh slowly turns into a cacophony of tearless sobs all coming from me. I look up to see that the curtains that surround my bed have been pulled back, revealing Leah. Her mouth is turned down in a scowl. I wipe the expression from my face as we stare at one another.

"Well, fancy seeing you here," Leah says, laughing humourlessly.

I say nothing in reply. I am still getting used to the whole conversation thing.

"Great talk. Doesn't feel one-sided at all."

I blink.

"Well, I would love to stay here and chat, but I should probably get going."

Sometimes people make no sense. Why would she want to stay here and 'chat' and where does she have to go?

"No, really. I should go. Was nice talking though," Leah laughs again, abruptly, but this time she seemed truly amused, "Christ, Mary, ever heard of a conversation?"

When I don't respond, Leah shakes her head and starts walking away. I suddenly go after her. It is as if I cannot control my feet. "Wait," I say.

Leah turns, but doesn't seem surprised. "Ah, it speaks!" she says.

I say nothing for a while and she doesn't either, her gaze fixed upon mine. I speak up.

"Where is Anna?"

Leah scoffs, "Hell if I know. Should've known you'd ask about her. It's written all over your face."

I am confused. I touch my face in a self conscious manner. "What is written all over my face?"

Smiling, Leah opens her mouth to speak, when we hear sound of approaching footsteps. Leah freezes, then quickly tries to scamper back to her area, but she is not fast enough. I stay stood in the same place, staring as Michael walks in. He smiles briefly before noticing Leah. The scowl he makes does not look good on him.

When Leah is settled back in bed after a few moments, Michael joins me where I am standing. His hands are on his hips. In what Jane would call a condescending tone, Michael says, "Mary, were you talking to that girl?"

I nod. I was.

Michael puts his hands on my shoulders, steering me back to my bed, as he says, "And do you trust me?"

I nod again. He is the only one I trust.

"Then trust me when I say you shouldn't talk to her. Okay? Will you do that for me?"

"Yes," I reply. Anything for Michael.

As soon as I think this my brain starts shrieking at me again. I clench my teeth together and bang my head against my hands. Sometimes through pain is the only way we can defeat pain.

Michael looks at me, shocked.

"Are you okay?"

Confused, I glance at him. Is he serious? The voices scream at me all the time, he knows this. He is usually not worried. I remove my hands from my face.

Only then do I realise they've come back covered in tears. My tears.

I have never cried in my time here. No amount of pain inflicted by brokers has ever gotten a tear out of me. So why now?

Michael has his wrist to his mouth, and he is talking to it. He keeps looking at me. I sway on my feet. I do not feel so good.

Suddenly Jane is holding me in her warm arms. She is carrying me to my Sanitorium bed. My eyelids feel heavy. Jane sits me upright in bed, then presses a cold glass of white liquid to my hands. "Drink, Mary," her gentle voice says. And I do.

The drink is tasteless, but it somehow reminds me of every second I've spent in this white-walled place. Every single time I've sat down with Jane as she tells me the things I need to know. And every moment I have curled my fingers around Michael's soft hands and every feeling I've ever had in my chest when I look at him. Anna and Leah's faces appear momentarily before I am lost in a dreamless sleep, for the second time today.

When I wake up again Michael is looking at me with a worried expression.

"Do you remember what happened last night?" he asks me. He then rephrases his question, as if he has said something wrong, "What do you remember of last night?"

I shrug. I do not remember much.

"I came to the Sanitorium because of the voices. But that was in the morning. Have I been asleep the whole time?"

Michael seems unsure when he says, "Yes. Yes, you have been asleep. Any bad dreams?"

"None."

Michael bends over and kisses my forehead gently. I do not know the meaning of this action but it sends a flurry of strange feelings down my body. He leaves me to my thoughts. And the voices. Although they are not yelling at me, I still feel a buzz of words at the back of my mind. I try to ignore them.

I am laying down to rest again when the curtains of my area pull back slightly.

I sit up and watch as a thin hand pulls them back completely, revealing a girl with a shaved head. What an interesting haircut. But she is pretty. I think.

"You okay, Mary?" the girl says, rambling, "I could hear you screaming so bad last night. Was it the bad dreams? Anna said something about that..."

She trails off when she sees my expression. How does she know my name?

"Hey, Mary, you good? What's wrong?"

I tremble. Something feels strange about what I am going to say.

But I say it anyways.

"Who are you?"

--:--

A/N:

The promised chapter is here! And it's not late! Kind of...

It's relatively short and not very interesting but I don't want to progress too fast, although there is a plot twist at the end!

This chapter is dedicated to gracefulgiggles because she is an asshole but her writing is pretty good.

Hope it's not too disappointing and that you like it! I enjoy writing this book :)

Comment whether you prefer Anna or Michael, or which one you would like to know better?

And what do you think about the situation with Leah/plot twist?

Remember that your feedback and votes are always deeply appreciated!

Love,

Tori x