I found myself reminded to keep you far away from me

--:--

I avoid her. I avoid her at the dinner hall and I avoid her in my mind. I avoid her because Michael told me to. And I do whatever Michael says. I think she tries to catch my attention during dinner, but I ignore her.

Anna is persistent.

I stand in the hallway between the rooms on the first floor. Jane has gone to get something; she promised to be back soon. I am waiting for her. She told me to stay in this exact spot, so that is what I am doing. The sound of footsteps, light, as if treading carefully, heads down the hallway. They come from behind me.

I don't turn around. Why should I?

She approaches me. I can feel it, her presence, beneath the suffocation and eerie tranquility of white walls and white doors and white tiles. Anna.

I close my eyes. To pretend she is not there is to obey, to open my eyes is to rebel. Jane will be here any minute. I keep my eyes closed. A slight breeze sweeps by my face. I open my eyes, much against the will of my mind and the will of Michael's words. Anna is waving her hand in front of my face. My eyebrows furrow in confusion. But I don't swat her hand away. Pushing something away before you understand it is always a mistake.

Anna laughs. Quietly. Her smile reaches her pale eyes and she tosses her hair back in a swift motion that seems more for looks than necessity, an act I don't comprehend. Her hand snakes towards my shoulder and rests there. I say nothing. Maybe I can pretend she's not there.

I try. I can't. Her eyes have me locked on her. I open my mouth to tell her to go away. I don't want her here. I don't want her here.

But I do.

Anna breaks the silence, looking cautiously over my right shoulder, "You're avoiding me."

I say nothing. I am.

"Why?"

My mind says don't. But I do. I say, "Michael told me to."

"And you just do what he says?" Anna replies in disbelief. Not allowing me to answer, she continues, "Now let's talk escape. This place is a fucking asylum and I want out."

I flinch. Escape is impossible. The unthinkable.

"What?" Anna misunderstands my action, "You don't want me to swear? Fine. Just help me find a way out of here."

"I can't."

Pause.

"Go away."

Anna grabs me by the shoulders, hard, her eyes taking on the same feral look she had when she first came. "I need to get out of here," she raises her voice, "Don't you understand? This... this is a place for psychopaths. You have to understand! What are you, crazy?"

That's when I scream. The voices whisper to me from all the corners of my mind. I push away from Anna. I hold my hands to my ears and I press. It's all I can do. I close my eyes. I'm on the floor now. My knees hit the cold, white ground and I can feel the freezing floor and white tiles through the thin, white fabric of my dress.

I've stopped screaming. My ears ring.

"Stop!"

I'm positively shrieking now. The voices, they won't go away. Hands grab my shoulders, gently pulling me to my feet.

Stop. Shut up.

They won't.

She won't.

Jane spins me around. My hair is tousled and has leapt to the front of my face, covering my eyes. My nails are in my mouth. I feel blood dripping. Drip. Drip. Onto my dress.

I can't help but giggle. The first bit of colour that is my own. Haven't seen that much blood, or even the colour red, since I got here. I don't even remember when that was. My vision blurs. Jane is yelling. I think she's calling for Michael. I don't know.

The last thing that registers is that Anna has gone. The only thing left of her is the imprint of her fingers on the back of my dress, by my shoulder blades. I giggle. She's pretty. And then I pass out.

"Come on, let's go and play!" she giggles, "Mommy doesn't need to know!"

"Doesn't need to know what?" I laugh nervously.

She pulls out something from her dress pocket. I can't see what it is. I can't see anything. Her face is blurred. The wind seems to suddenly become colder. Then why is it I feel like I'm choking on heat? Sweat drips down my back. Drip. I touch my back. My hand comes back sticky, the feel of warm liquid expanding on my palm. Drip.

My focus sharpens. In, and out, of focus. I can see it now. The blood on my hand. I can see what she's holding.

It's a lighter. In her other hand she's pulled out a pack of cigarettes. The old kind, from generations ago. Now we all know cigarettes kill you. It's illegal to smoke, of course.

My entire vision seems to go static for a moment, as if the air has rippled. Everything comes into focus. I see who it is. I sway.

I fall back, the ground beneath me slipping away. A laugh echoes as I fall, and fall, and fall.

I try to yell, but my breath catches. My throat is on fire.

Finally I feel something beneath me. The slippery warmth of cool water slides through my fingers. I breathe, relieved. My throat is no longer on fire. I gulp. I can't.

The water buries my voice. The blue ocean water turns to a menacing black as I kick my legs as hard as I can, one hand tight around my throat. I feel myself drifting away. I feel-

I wake up.

Michael's hot breath tickles my forehead. He straightens up. "You're awake, thank god," Michael says, his face relieving of all tension, "Don't worry, it wasn't as bad as last time."

"What-" I close my eyes tight, then open them again, "What happened?"

"You had a relapse-" his breath catches when he sees my expression, "You really don't remember?"

I shake my head. I don't.

Michael opens his mouth, as if to speak again. But before he can, I am being pulled up by Jane. Her eyebrows are tilted downwards as she looks at Michael. She told me people make that expression when they are angry, or frustrated. So why does she look at Michael like that?

The tiles of the Sanitorium floor cause every nerve in my bare feet to tingle. I shiver. My reaction brings on a flood of memories. Not memories, words. No, a single word.

Escape.

The word comes back to me in my head a thousand times.

Escape.

I put my hands on my ears, and press.

Escape.

I flinch.

Escape.

Then I black out.

--:--

A/N:

Finally!! It's been like three something weeks, so I apologise. I had severe writer's block for this chapter but I know (sort of) where the story is headed.

Please, please, please comment some feedback, especially about the dialogue between the characters, since I think I might need to work on making it sound more natural.

Also, if you haven't already, check out my Free Covers book! I take literally any request.

Aaaaand, please check out my friend (gracefulgiggles)'s book, To Checkmate A King, as it is pretty decent (just kidding it's really good).

That's all. Again, apologies for the late chapter. :((

Love, Tori x