Fifty days until the wedding.

> RED <

Next Friday, right after noon, Niall was standing at my doorstep again.
This time, followed by Liam.

"Guys. I'm kinda busy right now..." - I sighed, side-eying the script I was just reading and highlighting on my desk. Knowing I would have to postpone it until these two left.

"Well." - Niall clapped his hands, walking past me and moving to the dining room. - "I don't fucking care." - He grinned. - "You know why?"

"Why?" - I asked, kind of scared to hear the answer.

Liam patted my shoulder, also entering my penthouse and opened the coat closet to hang his own jacket.

"Because you did something wonderful, Harry!"

"What did I do?" - I frowned.

"Don't act like you don't know." - He laughed.

"Huh?"

"You send him a letter?" - Niall was grinning like crazy, wiggling his eyebrows. - "You followed my incredible advice! I'm so proud of you." - He ran towards me and poked my cheeks.

"Oh." - I finally realized what he was talking about. - "How... how did you know?"

"We met Louis this morning." - Liam explained.

"And he told you?!" - My eyes widened.

"Yes!" - Niall was jumping and clapping like a little kid. - "That means it actually meant something and you guys can be together again soon!"

"Do you know if he actually read it?" - I worriedly asked Liam, completely ignoring Niall.

"He probably did."

"He totally did! Didn't you see his face, Liam?" - Niall exclaimed. - "He was totally shaken up!"

"Really?" - I frowned, now even more worried than before. I honestly wasn't expecting a reaction from Louis.

"Harry, mate." - Niall grabbed my shoulders. - "This was the best thing you've ever done. You need to keep sending them."

"What? No. That was it. I told him what I needed. That's all."

"No! This is going to make him realize you're what he wants!"

"Niall. That letter was just a way to vent for me. To... let out my... I didn't even think he was going to read it!"

"You don't have to, H." - Liam said, calmly. - "But... I'm kind of with Niall on this. I think Louis marrying Eric is a bad idea."

"You too?" - I asked, not believing it.

"Louis is my best mate." - He shrugged. - "I can see right through him, and he... he's not fully happy with Eric. Even if he says he is."

I sighed.

"Uhm, Liam?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you know who proposed to who?"

"Eric did." - He chuckled.

"Oh. Okay." - I hummed. - "And... Do you know how... how was it?"

Liam shrugged.

"Louis just said Eric proposed one night while they were about to go to sleep, nothing special. But he said it was sweet." - Liam sighed. - "In my opinion, Louis only said yes because in his head that's what he had been pursuing since you. But not because he actually thought it through, you know?"

"He's been with Eric for a year, for god's sake!" - Niall yelled. - "Of course he didn't think it through."

"Niall, calm down." - Liam said. - "You're going to have a heart attack." - Then he turned to me. - "I think you speaking to him, even if it's through letters, is worth giving a shot. If not to get you two back together, at least it'll make him realize that marrying Eric so impulsively is not the right call."

I stared at the floor for a few seconds. My head was still spinning around the fact that Louis apparently reacted really badly to my unexpected letter.

"Did he really look that pained for the letter?"

"Yeah." - Liam nodded. - "He looked... I don't know. Broken. All over again." - Liam said, thoughtfully.

"He said he was reconsidering why he sent you the invitation in the first place." - Niall added.

"Do you know if he read it alone or...?"

"He received it alone. As far as we know, Eric doesn't know about it." - Liam answered, walking a few steps to the kitchen and pouring himself a glass of water.

"And I don't think Louis will tell him either." - Niall said after.

"Okay, guys. Wait." - I said, running my hands on my face. - "Does Eric know of me? Like... I know he knows of me as Louis' ex that now is on TV kinda thing. But, does he actually know how... why we broke up?"

"I don't know, mate." - Liam said and I frowned.

"Why did you meet with him today anyways?"

"He wanted to ask me and Liam to be his best man." - Niall rolled his eyes.

"Great." - I mumbled.

"No, it's not great! I don't want to be the best man for his wedding with Eric." - He said and I chuckled.

"I don't understand, guys. You both told me a bunch of times that Eric was actually a nice guy, why do you hate him now?"

"We don't hate him."- Liam said.

"Speak for yourself, mate. I'm team Harry all the way." - Niall huffed and it was time for Liam to roll his eyes.

"He is a nice guy. He's just... he is not Louis' type. That's all."

"That's why you need to step in, Harry!" - Niall insisted. - "Please, I'm begging you! I really don't want to be the best man for that stupid wedding." - He pouted, dramatically falling on his knees in front of me.

"I can't, Ni." - I sighed, extending my hand and helping him get up on his feet again. - "And you guys seriously need to go now. I can't waste any more time, I need to finish reading my scenes for tomorrow."

"Oh right. You're flying to Canada tomorrow, yeah?" - Liam asked.

"Just for three days but yeah." - I sighed.

"Then even better!" - Niall exclaimed. - "Write one right now!"

"What?"

"Make one now! Give it to me and we'll be out of your hair. I'll go by Louis' flat and give it to him without Eric noticing."

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"It totally is!"

"With you two watching me right now? No way."

"You can lock yourself in your room for a bit." - He shrugged.

"And then I'd have to trust you to go deliver it to Louis without reading it? Ha."

"So that means you're actually considering it?" - Niall smirked.

"No." - I said.

"I'll go with him. I won't let him read it." - Liam added with a soft smile.

"Hey!" - Niall pouted.

"Guys..." - I sighed. - "I don't know."

"Just..." - Liam stepped closer to me with another soft smile, characteristic of him. - "Can you try and see if there's anything else you want to tell him? It doesn't even have to be about the wedding. You can just try, and if nothing comes out of it then it's okay too. But I saw how revved he was today while mentioning your letter. You clearly still have an effect on him. It's worth the try."

I looked at Liam in his eyes, seeing nothing but sincerity and hope.

"Okay." - I nodded. - "I'll try."

Niall punched the air while grinning. And, as I retired to my bedroom for more privacy, I grabbed a stack of blank papers from my desk and a pen.

I sat in my large bed with my legs criss crossed, looking out the floor-to-ceiling windows.

Settling the papers in my lap, I sighed and started writing once more.

Louis
You got my first letter and now here I am, writing a second one.
Why? I'm still trying to figure that out.

Honestly, I was kinda hoping the first one would get lost in the mail so this nightmare I'm living wouldn't become real.

But it is real, isn't it? You're getting married.

With a man that didn't even make it special for you. That proposal you waited for so long, and he didn't make it memorable. Ironic, right?

Do you feel accomplished by going through with this wedding? Is it everything you've ever dreamed of?

Also, I've been wondering. Does he know about me?
Does he know why you ended things between us?
How does he feel about it?

Losing you became the lowest moment of my life. The worst memory I kept replaying over and over.
Missing you? Damn Louis, I've never felt so alone.
Trying to move on with my life and forget about you? Impossible. You're still present in the back of my mind as an echo even after a year and a half of not seeing you.
And I tried. I really tried.

But Louis, loving you was everything. It was the exhilarating feeling of having someone to share the rest of my life with. It was faster than the wind, passionate as sin. It was knowing that all I ever wanted was right in front of me and didn't need anything else.

I burned with love for you. Everyone knew, everyone saw.
I saw life in bright colors back then, but now I can only remember it in gray.
I tell myself, over and over again, that I have to let you go. You're in love with someone else now.
But how can I? Moving on from you is impossible, you're imprinted in my head.

I like to pretend I don't love you anymore. That the day you ended things was the day my love for you died. But it wasn't.
I still love you. Or at least I still love the memories and pieces I still own.

Because I don't own you. And I'll have to live with that.

Thank you for making me know that I'm capable of loving this way.

I hope Eric loves you even better. And I hope you feel for him the same way.

Thank you Louis, for making my heart beat even after all this time.

Don't reply to this and maybe Niall will stop insisting.
Don't comment. Don't react.
If I don't hear back from you, I'll stop.

This is my ultimate goodbye.

I moved away from the paper, noticing how my fresh tears were falling on it, blurring the ink just a little bit. Not enough to make an illegible stain, but blurry enough to recognize I was crying upon it.

Taking a new paper, I folded it, making an improvised envelope and shoving the letter inside.

After wiping my tears away, I went back to the kitchen, and without a word I gave the envelope to Niall.

"Now please go. I need to continue working." - I said, rudely opening the door of my penthouse and staring at them. - "Goodbye."

And so they left.